Monkey Tears at Nutraplanet!

N.Woods Giant

N.Woods Giant

Member
I saw this at Nutraplanet and was like WTF!?!?. It says they are the tears of some flying monkey, heres what the site says, "NutraPlanet has been breeding cage free Flying Monkeys -- raised on organic-antibiotic free, black angus beef and pure filtered water. Our Flying Monkeys are far superior in stature and potency due to their intense ninja training and precision supplementation*, yielding a proprietary specialized extract of tears far superior to any other brand.

I think its some kinda joke

I cant post links yet so just put the www in front of this: .nutraplanet.com/product/nutraplanet/flying-ninja-monkey-tears-1-ampule.html
 
Yes they are for real. Just use the search function and you will find plenty of threads on it. I was a beta tester and I gotta say its given me some serious strength gains. I added 30 pounds to my bench in 6 weeks. Sick pumps. Massive libido. Lost fat. What more can I say?
 
T-Bone said:
Yes they are for real. Just use the search function and you will find plenty of threads on it. I was a beta tester and I gotta say its given me some serious strength gains. I added 30 pounds to my bench in 6 weeks. Sick pumps. Massive libido. Lost fat. What more can I say?
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Are you serious?!? I thought this was some kinda joke!

I still dont think I'll be spending any money on them anytime soon. At least not until ive tried the less potent koala snot.
 
N.Woods Giant said:
I saw this at Nutraplanet and was like WTF!?!?. It says they are the tears of some flying monkey, heres what the site says, "NutraPlanet has been breeding cage free Flying Monkeys -- raised on organic-antibiotic free, black angus beef and pure filtered water. Our Flying Monkeys are far superior in stature and potency due to their intense ninja training and precision supplementation*, yielding a proprietary specialized extract of tears far superior to any other brand.

I think its some kinda joke

I cant post links yet so just put the www in front of this: .nutraplanet.com/product/nutraplanet/flying-ninja-monkey-tears-1-ampule.html
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I tried some and didn't really see much. Some strength gains and a little more mass, don't know how much I can attribute to the monkey tears.

Hit or miss really bro, some guys are seeing some really good gains so I guess I'm a non responder.
 
bashman said:
I tried some and didn't really see much. Some strength gains and a little more mass, don't know how much I can attribute to the monkey tears.

Hit or miss really bro, some guys are seeing some really good gains so I guess I'm a non responder.
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Do you think its really monkey tears or is it something else?
 
Its just a shame they are a suppository, hence the smooth shape of the applicator amp that dissolves internally once inserted.
 
That stuff is my go-to any time I run out of rabies and have trouble sourcing more.

Prefer pinning the rabies over Monkey Tears though. Monster pumps!
 
What exactly does this do? How do you us it. slin pins?
 
RoadBlocK said:
Its a suppository, best to buy the whole application kit for safety sake:

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oh man thanks, its what i was thinking....i may use it on a recomp:pat:
 
djbombsquad said:
What exactly does this do? How do you us it. slin pins?
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nah these guys are messing, pop the amp, and shoot it back, its water based so you can drink it, like winny....just itll tste bad, chase it with cranberry juice or something tart
 
sking6464 said:
nah these guys are messing, pop the amp, and shoot it back, its water based so you can drink it, like winny....just itll tste bad, chase it with cranberry juice or something tart
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I've heard grapefruit juice will increase absorption... I've heard a few guys are trying to make eye-dropper delivery systems.
 
BigBlackGuy said:
I've heard grapefruit juice will increase absorption... I've heard a few guys are trying to make eye-dropper delivery systems.
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i found the best dosing method to be injected directly into the testes, then administer the grapefruit juice as a suppository. best absorbtion.
 
I have done some major research on this topic and can divulge a little insider information without infringing any laws.

- 3 companies have applied for patent
- 1 company is coming out with a standardised form and selling licences to other companies for them to distribute
- A seperate company claims that tears from the antelope produce drier and faster gains despite the early studies only being performed on rats and woodlice.

Watch this space. I took them before and gained 15lbs of muscle in 2.5 days. I don't have any photos to show for it or bloodwork to back it up but I am a really nice guy and hope you lot will trust my testimonial because I put the word "bro" on the end.
 
Im still waiting for the release of Chuck Norris' Blood.
 
bdcc said:
I have done some major research on this topic and can divulge a little insider information without infringing any laws.

- 3 companies have applied for patent
- 1 company is coming out with a standardised form and selling licences to other companies for them to distribute
- A seperate company claims that tears from the antelope produce drier and faster gains despite the early studies only being performed on rats and woodlice.

Watch this space. I took them before and gained 15lbs of muscle in 2.5 days. I don't have any photos to show for it or bloodwork to back it up but I am a really nice guy and hope you lot will trust my testimonial because I put the word "bro" on the end.
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I would never question a man who considered my a "bro". Thank you for this unquestionably accurate information.
 
bdcc said:
I have done some major research on this topic and can divulge a little insider information without infringing any laws.

- 3 companies have applied for patent
- 1 company is coming out with a standardised form and selling licences to other companies for them to distribute
- A seperate company claims that tears from the antelope produce drier and faster gains despite the early studies only being performed on rats and woodlice.

Watch this space. I took them before and gained 15lbs of muscle in 2.5 days. I don't have any photos to show for it or bloodwork to back it up but I am a really nice guy and hope you lot will trust my testimonial because I put the word "bro" on the end.
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rolmfao....reps for sure!!!!!!!!!
 
Bump...seriously was this an April Fools joke or something?...
 
Celorza said:
Bump...seriously was this an April Fools joke or something?...
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U never tried em?
 
R they back in stock yet? I'd rather not get mine from one of those 'monkey (tear)-mills" but I heard you can just dose more to even it out
 
This HAS to be an april fools joke...lol or something like that
 
heh...hehe..Ha..HA..Hahaha...HAHA..BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHA :toofunny:

I want it.
 
kokobeware2 said:
I prefer the monkey tears on bb.com
Sorry np
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I'm so negging this persona to red when I get home, nothing from sh1tdotcom is better than NP and AM
 
Celorza said:
I'm so negging this persona to red when I get home, nothing from sh1tdotcom is better than NP and AM
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Haha don't tase me bro. Just joking. I can honestly say I have never ordered anything from the bb.com. Most stuff comes from NP got a package coming tomorrow. My bad broski
 
kokobeware2 said:
Haha don't tase me bro. Just joking. I can honestly say I have never ordered anything from the bb.com. Most stuff comes from NP got a package coming tomorrow. My bad broski
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You do realize I was kidding right? Now back to the monkey tears...would this be different/better/weaker than having Iron Ox Testes for breakfast?
 
Celorza said:
You do realize I was kidding right? Now back to the monkey tears...would this be different/better/weaker than having Iron Ox Testes for breakfast?
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Eh you can be too careful. Wasn't sure how hardcore you were about it.
 
kokobeware2 said:
Eh you can be too careful. Wasn't sure how hardcore you were about it.
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Lol don't worry about it haha, I havent negged someone in a while now haha, I learned it is a mean thing to do :3 that must be left for underage kids doing PH/DS or AAS stuff and advertizing it haha.
 
T-Bone said:
Yes they are for real. Just use the search function and you will find plenty of threads on it. I was a beta tester and I gotta say its given me some serious strength gains. I added 30 pounds to my bench in 6 weeks. Sick pumps. Massive libido. Lost fat. What more can I say?
Click to expand...

I had similar results no complaints here.
 
Celorza said:
Lol don't worry about it haha, I havent negged someone in a while now haha, I learned it is a mean thing to do :3 that must be left for underage kids doing PH/DS or AAS stuff and advertizing it haha.
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Negged.
 
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