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Gym Confessions (yup, I have been that guy)

brownieapple said:
meh. this is going to make me look like an ass. so take it easy on me fellas. remember im sorta-ish new to this.

i just maxed at 225 on bench this past week. and just two weeks before i was the kid who dumped 185. had it for 3 reps and it just came down wrong any my buddy couldn't spot it. and it just kinda tumpped over like a bag of bricks. funny thing is i didn't feel like an ass afterward.since i rarely ever see anyone ever go bigger than 135.

isnt really a d-bag kinda story but just a one of those guys kinda thing.
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1. A spotter who can't help you with 185 is worthless. Find someone who can actually keep you safe.

2. Change gyms - nobody every goes over 135 on bench? My wife can bench more than that!

3. Everybody makes mistakes; the key is to learn from them. Why did you fail with 185? Are you not paying enough attention to what your body is telling you? Is your form sub-par? It's all a learning experience. :D
 
BMCLouzee said:
I've been that girl that tries to look tough and finds the skinniest, weakest guy and do more weight and reps
Yeah, I know, I'm horrible.
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LOL

Girls in Iraq better expect to be looked at if they have nice asses, even if they are wearing 5x sweatsuits lol.

I lift in my uniform, and run on the treadmill in my boots?

Heres one that's def DB though: there's one mirror in my gym that is messed up or magic and it makes me look bigger than I am, so I walk by it maybe 3 or 4 times a day to check my "future progress"
 
Oh I have another one!

When I do shrugs one side of my lip goes up, into a snarl. I look PHEARSOMEZ whenever I do shrugs, but I also feel like a douche, and look around to see if anyone saw me. Everyone looks away because they don't want me to headbutt their faces into oblivion. At leas thtat's what I tell myself. Seriously though, i shrug up and one sid eof my lip goes up w me, I shrug down and it goes down. LOL.

Oh yeah, Keyahs or grunts or whatever release adrenaline, giving you an extra little bit. It doesnt work if you are doing it every rep though, if thats the case you just need to learn how to breath lol
 
alright well this is kinda bad but not really.... i just had a really douche moment at my gym.

This fat guy in his mid 30's who must weight at least 400lbs and not even close to being in shape i mean he is fat as hell. everytime he sees me he makes some comment about juice or talks **** when i am around, not directly to me but definately about me and i know this cause he makes it blatantly obvious.

So the other day he is benching and he starts up with the ronnie coleman "light weight, the BOOOO, and ya buddy" stuff. Gets under the bench and fails miserably at like 315. After his buddies pick the weight off his chest i walk over and say "ronnie coleman can actually lift weights, u cant even lift ur own body weight, ur a fat useless **** and oh yeah the ****ing treadmills are over there (points to cardio section) u miserable bitch, how about u stop spending ur pay check on the dollar menu and learn how to ****ing diet and train, u are the furtherst thing in the world from ronnie coleman and no girl has any interest in ur fat ****ing ugly ass"... Now what i exactly said may have differed a little bit cause i have had it with this guys crap and im sure i included a few more swears and im sure the english wasnt perfect, however i did feel a little bit like i over did it after i left.... oh fyi 750mg test e didnt make me any more level headed at that moment..... fail.....
 
to add to the above statement this guy has been on my ass for about 3 months now.... hopefully this will have ended it.
 
slacker86 said:
to add to the above statement this guy has been on my ass for about 3 months now.... hopefully this will have ended it.
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HAHAHA.... Screw that guy, you did what anyone would have. He shouldn't have been talking sh*t about you. He's probably scared to death now lol...
I wouldn't doubt it if he left the gym and ate away his frustrations at the closest Wendy's ...
 
EustisPanther said:
HAHAHA.... Screw that guy, you did what anyone would have. He shouldn't have been talking sh*t about you. He's probably scared to death now lol...
I wouldn't doubt it if he left the gym and ate away his frustrations at the closest Wendy's ...
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He's probably a masochist and just went and rubbed one out afterwards. He probably wont leave you alone until you bring a whip and and beat him silly.
 
Shane0Mac said:
woah dude!
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Just saying, its a weird world we live in. Totally kidding though :D About the masochist/whip thing. I think it's important to raise masochism awareness though, its a sickness, and if you know someone who does that, you need to find them help.
 
I wear wife beaters
I T-bag my little brother on the bench
I don't do legs half the time
I flex in mirrors
I take huge dumps before i workout
I fart into the fan point towards my buddies
Whoever can't lift as much as me i call a *****

Imma d-bag at times
 
I've definitely been the guy to talk for 80% of my workout.

But that's only when I visit my old hometown, and I see people I haven't talked to in 6 months.

-I've been the guy who eats rice cakes and jelly in the locker room post-workout
-I've been the guy who did worthless sets/lifts just because I knew there was a girl in my line of sight who was going to see me... d-bagish lol
 
jjds2099 said:
I have been the guy to rip such horrid farts everyone within about 20 ft get a sick look on their face
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I've been the guy that smelled naturally lol... Overdosing on L-Carnitine.. Made my sweat smell like a fish that had been baking in the sun for days lol.. My lifting partner wouldn't stand next to me unless he was spotting me.

The bad part is, I couldn't smell myself, so I wouldn't know and I'd go talk to someone and then BAM the smell hit them HAHA
 
BigBeazy said:
I wear wife beaters
I T-bag my little brother on the bench
I don't do legs half the time
I flex in mirrors
I take huge dumps before i workout
I fart into the fan point towards my buddies
Whoever can't lift as much as me i call a *****

Imma d-bag at times
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Lmaoo...I take huge dumps b4 workouts too from eating massive amounts of food hrs b4 during work, I HATE that dude that wanna work in wit u...now u gotta spot his lite lifts and keep readding ur plates back on plus more...then he spot u n u turning ur head back n forth eyes squeezing shut not from the lift but from his sack swinging ova ur forehead...and wats wrong with wifebeaters, I get off from work and take my shirt off and lift regardless what I pack in my gymbag...sorry everybody don't buy 300 dollars worth of matching nike or underarmor outfits just to do curls and stare in the mirror
 
I'm the d-bag who walks around with shorts that smell like ass and everytime I walk it fans my sweaty swamp ass smell out. Especially at towards the middle/end of my wo.

I only have one pair of gym shorts. I have tried to wash the smell out. **** you
 
^ the only time I'm really embarrassed is in the mornings when doing my cardio and the ladies are out. Running and those shorts flopping around just wafting the smell everywhere...

I usually spray them with Axe for those times. But then it's just a blend of **** and crap cologne in the air
 
Dizmal said:
^ the only time I'm really embarrassed is in the mornings when doing my cardio and the ladies are out. Running and those shorts flopping around just wafting the smell everywhere...

I usually spray them with Axe for those times. But then it's just a blend of **** and crap cologne in the air
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I've been wearing the same gym shorts for 4 years. They smell like battery acid and rancid dead fish towards the end of my workout... I own new shorts too lol, but they all smell the same after awhile. I've been told to put a cup of vinegar in the wash with your gym clothes, never tried it though.
 
I'll have to try that. I just soaked them all day yesterday in the wash machine. STILL smelled like ass in the ass area fresh out of the dryer... and yeah, why buy more only to have them smell the same in 2 weeks?
 
Dam that's pretty brutal.

The only smell I've never been able to get out of clothes is the smokey chemical smell that comes new on some black or dark grey dyed jeans. I even did an internet search trying to find out a way to get rid of that smell and no one seems to have figured it out.

Here's one: I totally ass-ripped a pair of boxers over the weekend while doing ass to grass squats. They were an old pair anyway so no real loss, but dammit if I wasn't checking to make sure I didn't actually rip my workout shorts!
 
Squats in boxers = major ball pincher for me. Gotta go with something stretchy, and that provides more support. Gotta hold the boys out of harms way! :)

buuzer0 said:
Dam that's pretty brutal.

The only smell I've never been able to get out of clothes is the smokey chemical smell that comes new on some black or dark grey dyed jeans. I even did an internet search trying to find out a way to get rid of that smell and no one seems to have figured it out.

Here's one: I totally ass-ripped a pair of boxers over the weekend while doing ass to grass squats. They were an old pair anyway so no real loss, but dammit if I wasn't checking to make sure I didn't actually rip my workout shorts!
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I can't ever do boxers =x they own my crack, boxer briefs for me, just like Michael jordan and charlie sheen. I've grabbed my w/o shorts before and hopped into bed with them, started to get frisky with my lady, and then heard, "something stinks really bad" tried to play it off like it was coming from the vent or something, but in the end it was still my shorts. lol.
 
for those with stinky shorts = soak in strong solution of water and oxy-clean (like two scoops to enough hot water to cover shorts)
Works for me anyways...
 
drivehard said:
I have spent a good amount of time laughing it up at the many threads associated with getting a laugh out of the guys we see at the gym. Well, this morning I realized...hey, I have been that guy a time or two. So, its time to throw it in reverse, and confess when we were "That guy"

What got me thinking is just this morning I was doing curls with an empty curl bar - 4 sets of 50 reps trying to re-hab my bicep tear. I could see a guy looking at me funny like "how are you going to get big doing that?" I realized we all have certain circumstance that make us do things that aren't "cool" in the gym, so I thought I would come clean.

I have...

Done 3" knee bend squats - yup, I hated them

Picked my butt off the bench during a max attempt - oh yeah, I used to get a good arch going back in the day

Curled in the squat rack - oh yes, I still do...but I get there at 5:00am, and am the ONLY person there

stopped and chatted it up with an old friend while hogging a bench

worn a wife-beater to the gym

lifted in jeans

lifted my shirt to check out my abs after a set of crunches

OK, I feel better now :silly:

So, what have you done????????????
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Done all the above but never, and i repeat NEVER lifted in jeans. Thats just not cool, cool at all man, and everybody here knows that. Thats like in the top 5 in all-time rules, unless your OG then you go by a totally different rule book.
 
drivehard said:
for those with stinky shorts = soak in strong solution of water and oxy-clean (like two scoops to enough hot water to cover shorts)
Works for me anyways...
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THAAAAANK you soooo much! I usually just soak them with ax pre w/o. But your way sounds waaay better.
 
ive lfited in jeans- yeah im that guy- i have also lifted in my work uniform- what I was a full time student/part time worker- i was low on time lol
 
buuzer0 said:
I wear tank tops/wife beaters 90% of the time when I go to the gym, especially in the summer. Not trying to show off, they're just more comfortable and keep me cooler.
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haha ya deep into my cut phase I must admit I've recently become one of those guys who wears those shirts that are ripped apart and only tied at the very bottom.... douche yes I know. But its ok because I fit in w/ all the other college douche lifters here :)


I know there are more of you out there.... its ok
 
ROFL at some of these. Some funny crap I see almost daily :P

On the smell thing, I've also heard putting lemon juice in the washer with them will take any smell out.

Now, my list:

I take hardcore battle dumps pre-WO...stay away from the stall with the mushroom clouf over it.

I used to be the 1/4 length squatter. The one that goes a few inches then pops back up like a prairie dog outta his hole.

I used to do BB curls without watching my back, and was amazed how my weight went up so much (and didn't realize I was just swinging more each time)

I'm the guy that picks up weights left around, even by bigger guys than me

I used to get a drink from the fountain after every single set/exercise

I will get pissed if you stand between me and the mirror(even at hot chicks...after a few seconds). I'm in front of it to check my form, not to stare at your nasty hairy back while you curl 20 lbs.

I rarely ever smile, unless it's a really old lady

I hate working in with someone or having them work in with me... I would bring a team of lifters with me if I wanted to unrack and re-rack my weights after every freaking set.

I get that "WTF" look when I see someone bigger than me doing less weight

I hate waiting in the line for the fountain when some douche decides to bring his empty bottle and fill it at the gym(not talking mid-workout fill)

That's all I can think of for now :P
 
+10 points shadow, bahahaha.

I also get pissed when someone is between me and the mirror, and I have to move the dip bar every time because some jackass does dips super fast and moves scoots the ****ing bar away from the mirror lol
 
i guess i'm blessed because I don't have the stinky gym shorts from hell problem. but i have broken some of the basic rules of the gym:

I'm guilty of curling in the squat rack (in my defense we have 3 and none were being used)

I tend to check out my calves in the mirror most often. they are what i'm working to improve the most.

When a hottie is on the leg abductor machine i'm guilty of sneaking a peak betwixt the legs. Usually greeted by a thong of some sort :32:

was doing military press the other day and the bar went behnind the support when i was racking it and fell seven feet to the ground and made a fuk load of noise.

when i do legs i've let a noticeable toot go every so often. but i'm guilty of breathing hard and pushing it through closed lips which can make loud ass fart noises sometimes...:grumpy:
 
JoHNnyNuTZ said:
I have a Non Homo problem.....Had to put NON-HOMO... Ijust got into bodybuilding like a year and a half ago....When I started going to the gym obviously i wasnt in the best shape of my life.....My problem....I stare!!!! No seriously all those big ass mo'fo's throwing weights around looking that they could consume my 260pound body)at the time) in seconds.) Im not gay, dont like Peni, But I appreciate dudes that are jacked....I find myself ingulfed in there workout...What are they doin that im not ou know...I think I spent 30 full minutes watching this monstyer destroy weights...I was actually more intrigued buy what he was doing that I forgot to workout myself!!
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Ha, this still happens to me on occasion. Since I have only been bodybuilding for about 1 1/2 years and just getting into college, I admit that I'm not the biggest dude at the gym. So when some of my friends show up (guys who have been doing this for years and who are older than I), it always amazes me to see someone who's 6' 260 lbs. hack squating 5 plates and benching 315+. Everything takes time to achieve, except patience!
 
I was that guy who would be bent half over at the waist trying to squeeze out my last couple of reps when squatting...............Now I that guy who had one back surgery at 34 and now at 39 have one coming up this fall!!
 
Ive flexed in mirriors and worn a beater, idc. If people wanna hate on me let them

wearing my sleevless puma shirt in my avi, idc. if people are so focused on what others are doing they got some self confidence problems.
 
^^ I wear low hats and beaters all the time in the gym.. I just don't give a fock..
and ya I do quick flexes frequently in the mirror.. like you said if ppl want to hate then let them, and if they dont like me so be it
 
Cass9311 said:
some people get their pants in a wad and say "why would you wear one indoors"??....
lol I do it for the sweat getting in my eyes personally
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oh i got ya, i do the same thing sometimes i just wasn't even sure that there was an argument against them haha.
 
votum said:
Just saying, its a weird world we live in. Totally kidding though :D About the masochist/whip thing. I think it's important to raise masochism awareness though, its a sickness, and if you know someone who does that, you need to find them help.
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dude, i am laughing my a$$ off right now. it's national masochist awareness month, find help for you or your loved ones by calling 1-800-1-fetish.

seriously though, i've been the bad fart guy on the squat rack, i jumped in on the squat rack cause the dudes waiting for it were too busy hitting on the chick wearing the spandex and sport bra. my gym has a pool, and i swim alot after i lift and there was a guy that would come in also about the same time and eventually asked me about how many laps to do, what strokes, etc, etc. i got a big head thinking yeah i'm cool, swimming as fast as i could (backstroke), BOOM, into the wall, i haven't seen stars like that since taking a 40 oz bottle over the head.
 
bigsexy74 said:
dude, i am laughing my a$$ off right now. it's national masochist awareness month, find help for you or your loved ones by calling 1-800-1-fetish.

seriously though, i've been the bad fart guy on the squat rack, i jumped in on the squat rack cause the dudes waiting for it were too busy hitting on the chick wearing the spandex and sport bra. my gym has a pool, and i swim alot after i lift and there was a guy that would come in also about the same time and eventually asked me about how many laps to do, what strokes, etc, etc. i got a big head thinking yeah i'm cool, swimming as fast as i could (backstroke), BOOM, into the wall, i haven't seen stars like that since taking a 40 oz bottle over the head.
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I swam on the high school and club level when I was younger. I was doing a 200IM at one event and was dominating everyone and I lost concentration and forgot to count my strokes from the flags to the wall while doing backstroke.... headsmash.
 
bikeswimlive said:
I swam on the high school and club level when I was younger. I was doing a 200IM at one event and was dominating everyone and I lost concentration and forgot to count my strokes from the flags to the wall while doing backstroke.... headsmash.
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I swam in high school as well. One time I was on the starting block for the 200 free and they told us to take our marks....then when they went to say "stand up" I jumped the gun but tried to stop myself so I ended up 1/2 jumping 1/2 falling into the pool and did a big belly flop....then I proceeded to take last place because I had no concentration and was pissed.
 
WILL DA BEAST said:
I swam in high school as well. One time I was on the starting block for the 200 free and they told us to take our marks....then when they went to say "stand up" I jumped the gun but tried to stop myself so I ended up 1/2 jumping 1/2 falling into the pool and did a big belly flop....then I proceeded to take last place because I had no concentration and was pissed.
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HA the same happened to me before. I was on the block in a tucked position and they said stand up instead of beeping us to go. I was stuck in a stage that was half-diving/half trying to stay on the block. I eventually just plopped down in the water. What made it worse is it was at a zone meet and I got DQ'd for a false start.
 
BMCLouzee said:
I've been THAT chick that thinks your perverted self has been staring at my ass and will ultimately glance at your direction with pure hate.
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I've been that guy, but nothing makes me work harder than some eye candy between sets.


My worst offense: a group of three douchebags doing sets of 60# preacher curls. Without asking I cut in on the preacher when they were getting a water break, threw a few more plates on the thing, pumped out my set and walked away as if I were hot ****...

Douchebag calling douchebags douchbags.

Ive also lifted in the same shirt and shorts 5 workouts in a row, without a wash. I smelled damn sexy and you know it!
 
Zero V said:
I

But its proven in Martial Arts, a Kyah(spelling?) causes the user to generate more force. A Kyah is a deep and quick yell, think Bruce Lees chicken squawk. He wasnt benching 500lbs... But they have an actual purpose, you can connect with more power.
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Bruce Lees chicken squawk was simply to piss people off, and get them to screw up. Psychological warfare.

But the Kai thing is real, all the UFC fighters do it now, and it really increases force for some reason.
 
I have yet to ever lift in a wife beater or jeans. But i'm pretty bad i do rock my white T's to the gym and they are mediums for a guy who usually wears large. But i don't care i like the way i look in them and they are plenty cheap. I'm also guilty of being the douchebag who hates the small guys who clearly try to show off for their girlfriend they brought to the gym so i wait till finishes swinging his arm on his bicep curl. Then go over do proper form and go bigger weight than him to show him up. Major douchebag of me.
 
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