KLEEN LIVING - A log about Life, Training, and Nutrition.

[MrKleen73]

Oh wow man that sucks….yeah, whenever you run a fever with congestion and lose your sense of taste, you pretty much know you have COVID. It is handy that they have the over the counter tests so you know for sure. Sounds like you got hit by one of the bad ones. Hopefully you’ll recover well and it won’t be a long setback for you.

It was odd because the heavy chest, no smell and taste stuff all came on at different points that didn't present like covid at first. I had no cough, or chest tightness at all and the first couple of meals that seemed off I could kind of justify why for various reasons. The fact I didn't really want to eat with a fever didn't surprise me, so my not wanting to chew or swallow made sense to me. Plus I could still taste a few flavors at first, they were just off. Tuesday the heavy chest started, and I told the wife I needed an inhaler, she said she saw a Covid/Flu A/Flu B test at the store and I told her nah who cares I won't do anything differently either way, but also thought well if it isn't one of those I probably need antibiotics. However, the way it slowly reared it's head, covid was the furthest from my mind at first. I was like Flu or Strep... Done. WRONG!!!

 

[Dustin07]

well if it isn't one of those I probably need antibiotics.

It was odd because the heavy chest,

yeah man tight/heavy chest is the worst in my head, that's the type of thing that is just gonna stress me out and give me anxiety. I agree with you on the covid thing but you do make a good point about eliminating it and knowing if you need to deal with something else. I'm glad you are bouncing back though!!! I don't remember having a tight chest when I went through covid, although who knows how many times I did. the only time I tested cause I was flying it was just like a bad headcold, loss of taste/smell were very very short lived for me, but it was more like that I'm really tired and achey thing so I just drank more coffee/redbull and had ibuprofen every morning lol. the second time I thought I had it cause my wife had exposure at work so we opted out of attending an event where our whole social circle was over the age of 70 and that weekend for ONE day, I felt like I had shortness of breath on easy walks and had the runs. which at the time was considered a big symptom.

but yeah, tight chest is no fun. I'm really bad about that when I think my chest is tight or breathing labored, I get all in my head. maybe its like childhood ptsd from crupe, those nasty heaving coughs where you're trying to clear your throught just so you can breathe and you almost panic thinking you're suffocating.

 

[MrKleen73]

yeah man tight/heavy chest is the worst in my head, that's the type of thing that is just gonna stress me out and give me anxiety. I agree with you on the covid thing but you do make a good point about eliminating it and knowing if you need to deal with something else. I'm glad you are bouncing back though!!! I don't remember having a tight chest when I went through covid, although who knows how many times I did. the only time I tested cause I was flying it was just like a bad headcold, loss of taste/smell were very very short lived for me, but it was more like that I'm really tired and achey thing so I just drank more coffee/redbull and had ibuprofen every morning lol. the second time I thought I had it cause my wife had exposure at work so we opted out of attending an event where our whole social circle was over the age of 70 and that weekend for ONE day, I felt like I had shortness of breath on easy walks and had the runs. which at the time was considered a big symptom.

but yeah, tight chest is no fun. I'm really bad about that when I think my chest is tight or breathing labored, I get all in my head. maybe its like childhood ptsd from crupe, those nasty heaving coughs where you're trying to clear your throught just so you can breathe and you almost panic thinking you're suffocating.

Yeah, I had childhood asthmatic bronchitis so bad, I will still get it and have my lungs completely lock up. I have had fluid on my lungs too many times. Which is odd because they say my lung health is great, but I am super sensitive to getting asthmatic bronchitis now if I start feeling my chest get tight and don't locate an inhaler of some sort pretty quickly.

 

[MrKleen73]

I moved this part of the convo over from Segan's log because I didn't want to completely derail his thread. Especially since this response unintentionally got very personal, I felt it belonged in my log.

I fully relate to this... lol


na I'm the same way entirely. I gotta force myself in to do most things, be it a simple training session, or yard work. but dang it feels good when you follow through!! I always know that the discipline today will yield results tomorrow !

Agreed, on the top half, but that second part, I know in my head, not so much the same in my heart. What the voice inside tells me when there is no motivation and discipline is required is quite different. Old statements of you are going to end up dead or in prison, why can't you just do right, you aren't going to amount to much, you screw everything up anyways, why even bother. Those are the messages that play for me in those times. .

This is the unfortunate self messaging a lot of people that grew up with ADHD have play over and over in their heads. Especially if they grew up before ADHD was more widely recognized and understood. I am not blaming ADHD for any of my current issues, we all have challenges we have to deal with. However when the internal voices are giving feedback like that, instead of having a positive base of encouragement and the belief that "Discipline today brings results tomorrow" you can imagine how hard it is to have to defeat the voice inside telling you that "you are going to fail anyway so why try", before you can even make the decision to do the right thing.

Of course, that is just me going off of what happens in my head, but it can be so paralyzing at times. It is kind of where I am now, fighting those demons and trying to shut that negative mother fcker up, so I can get my head right and back in the game. I can't tell you all how many times in the last few months I have almost made a statement that I am doing this now or this, or that, then rethink it telling myself this same BS every damn time and being like I am not ready to fight for it yet, so I delete an entire post not believing I am ready to stick to it. Which simply leads to more non-committal behavior.

I imagine some of you have intuitively noticed that I am fighting with something. I am, it is that damn voice inside screaming at me. However, I am also building toward something, toward being sick and tired of being sick and tired. So stay tuned, I am going to drowned that mother fcker out!!! Then we are all going to see me fly again.

While this was an unexpected derailment, and more vulnerable than I ever really intended to be with this post, I am just going to leave it out here. It is real, it is raw, and hopefully it is also helpful for others to know what demons rattle around in peoples heads, even the people we respect and or may look up to at times. So with this a share a little of my pain, a little of my heart, and a lot of my vulnerability with you.

 

[Segansational]

It was odd because the heavy chest, no smell and taste stuff all came on at different points that didn't present like covid at first. I had no cough, or chest tightness at all and the first couple of meals that seemed off I could kind of justify why for various reasons. The fact I didn't really want to eat with a fever didn't surprise me, so my not wanting to chew or swallow made sense to me. Plus I could still taste a few flavors at first, they were just off. Tuesday the heavy chest started, and I told the wife I needed an inhaler, she said she saw a Covid/Flu A/Flu B test at the store and I told her nah who cares I won't do anything differently either way, but also thought well if it isn't one of those I probably need antibiotics. However, the way it slowly reared it's head, covid was the furthest from my mind at first. I was like Flu or Strep... Done. WRONG!!!

Ah dang man, hate to see you down for the count! 70% capacity right now is no joke. Rest up, lots of fluids, etc. The loss of taste thing has to be really weird. But I do remember when I had it, I was super fatigued from basic stuff - can't imagine trying to workout while having COVID.

 

[Hyde]

I moved this part of the convo over from Segan's log because I didn't want to completely derail his thread. Especially since this response unintentionally got very personal, I felt it belonged in my log.


Agreed, on the top half, but that second part, I know in my head, not so much the same in my heart. What the voice inside tells me when there is no motivation and discipline is required is quite different. Old statements of you are going to end up dead or in prison, why can't you just do right, you aren't going to amount to much, you screw everything up anyways, why even bother. Those are the messages that play for me in those times. .

This is the unfortunate self messaging a lot of people that grew up with ADHD have play over and over in their heads. Especially if they grew up before ADHD was more widely recognized and understood. I am not blaming ADHD for any of my current issues, we all have challenges we have to deal with. However when the internal voices are giving feedback like that, instead of having a positive base of encouragement and the belief that "Discipline today brings results tomorrow" you can imagine how hard it is to have to defeat the voice inside telling you that "you are going to fail anyway so why try", before you can even make the decision to do the right thing.

Of course, that is just me going off of what happens in my head, but it can be so paralyzing at times. It is kind of where I am now, fighting those demons and trying to shut that negative mother fcker up, so I can get my head right and back in the game. I can't tell you all how many times in the last few months I have almost made a statement that I am doing this now or this, or that, then rethink it telling myself this same BS every damn time and being like I am not ready to fight for it yet, so I delete an entire post not believing I am ready to stick to it. Which simply leads to more non-committal behavior.

I imagine some of you have intuitively noticed that I am fighting with something. I am, it is that damn voice inside screaming at me. However, I am also building toward something, toward being sick and tired of being sick and tired. So stay tuned, I am going to drowned that mother fcker out!!! Then we are all going to see me fly again.

While this was an unexpected derailment, and more vulnerable than I ever really intended to be with this post, I am just going to leave it out here. It is real, it is raw, and hopefully it is also helpful for others to know what demons rattle around in peoples heads, even the people we respect and or may look up to at times. So with this a share a little of my pain, a little of my heart, and a lot of my vulnerability with you.

When it comes to reaching a specific objective goal, if you can’t go the distance… you won’t.

That absolute truth acknowledged, a lot of what we value, the real reasons we do it, in the world of pumping iron IS NOT absolute. I mean if you want to lift X or get to Y bodyfat or win Z contest, those either happen or don’t. BUT, every little step you take, every choice and action, ultimately may be moving you closer or further from those type of goals. And if you make progress towards them, that is usually enjoyable/rewarding as a process.

Doing a workout can feel good. Making a dietary decision at one meal can be satisfying & empowering. Getting down just 5lbs, even if you want to lose 50, puts you 5lbs leaner, healthier, and closer to your ideal goal. It’s not all or nothing! The process in any capacity of completion, at any pace, leaves you better off than had you not done anything.

I realize all of that doesn’t facilitate the achievement of grand goals, but there is so much to be said for both enjoying whatever you do accomplish as well as realizing that wins build momentum towards more wins.

The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step…and what people neglect to mention is that the entire thing remains a journey of individual steps, over and over. Every little one, no matter how often you rest or slow, ultimately is taking you closer to the destination.

Try to live for the steps!