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RickyBlobby

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DemntedCowboy

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Honestly the main thing I miss, now that I've had a couple months to explore my thoughts and feelings, is having someone that i care for, feel connected with and that i can trust.

Sex would be really nice but honestly other than the brief high from the whole ordeal it really hasn't brought me any sort of sustainable break from the emptiness.

I was depressed and felt really empty and alone until we started talking. Now I feel normal.

So for me the only thing I need/ missed is the feeling of being connected.

And she seems pretty content doing the mom thing. And I think she feels the same way about feeling a connection. She really isn't that worried about sex except for a couple times we got on the subject/ swapped pics (which she doesnt like to do) and she got hot and bothered and was like ok we need this to happen soon lol. But I can tell that she really does NOT want to rush into that and apparently feels like I'm gonna hurt/ betray her if she gives it up.

I guess what I'm saying in a nutshell is that neither of us is really missing anything more than companionship right now.
Thats what me and my second wife where missing. She was missing a father of her kids, I was missing being married. And that can take a while to get over. You need to experience single life again. It's tough but, I can admit it takes time. My wife now, and I dated for 2 yrs, and at times we still have our issues after 10 yrs. And I'm not ashamed to say that sometimes I feel alone, but the fear of losing my 1st and only ever daughter keep me from doing anything about it. I know that God brought her into my life for a reason, and that after 10 yrs with MS she is still here to protect me from myself. My ex's contact me all the time, cause they realize what they lost. But, I know they are no longer in my life for a reason. I may never know the reason. But, there is a reason they are no longer there.
There is no reason why they leave us. But, there is always reason. Even if you don't know why.
 
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Hyde

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I agree that crazy nasty sex is going to occur.

What do you mean by co dependent relationship and by we arent mature enough? Genuinely curious
Thats what me and my second wife where missing. She was missing a father of her kids, I was missing being married. And that can take a while to get over. You need to experience single life again. It's tough but, I can admit it takes time. My wife now, and I dated for 2 yrs, and at times we still have our issues after 10 yrs. And I'm not ashamed to say that sometimes I feel alone, but the fear of losing my 1st and only ever daughter keep me from doing anything about it. I know that God brought her into my life for a reason, and that after 10 yrs with MS she is still here to protect me from myself. My ex's contact me all the time, cause they realize what they lost. But, I know they are no longer in my life for a reason. I may never know the reason. But, there is a reason they are no longer there.
There is no reason why they leave us. But, there is always reason. Even if you don't know why.
@RickyBlobby, DC really expressed it perfectly - and this post from him illustrates the maturity I am speaking of.

Humans are built to be social creatures and desire at least some companionship. BUT we cannot create high-functioning, healthy relationships when they are built on a foundation of “gimme”. You have to get to a state where you desire a relationship because you have love to share, not needs that must be met. Do you have a best friend just because he has a sweet boat? Of course not - you go boating together BECAUSE of your great friendship. Nobody will have a good time boating with an asshole, and that’s what will happen in a codependent relationship.

Reread your post above about what you want and replace the words about a relationship with “heroine” - can you see how in your current state you are going to this woman to get what you need to feel whole, to GET your fix? When you are really ready again to have a serious relationship, you will be coming to it to GIVE.

You will achieve this state in due time, but for now, you need to heal - and it’s going to fucking hurt for a while.
 
Matthersby

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@RickyBlobby, DC really expressed it perfectly - and this post from him illustrates the maturity I am speaking of.

Humans are built to be social creatures and desire at least some companionship. BUT we cannot create high-functioning, healthy relationships when they are built on a foundation of “gimme”. You have to get to a state where you desire a relationship because you have love to share, not needs that must be met. Do you have a best friend just because he has a sweet boat? Of course not - you go boating together BECAUSE of your great friendship. Nobody will have a good time boating with an asshole, and that’s what will happen in a codependent relationship.

Reread your post above about what you want and replace the words about a relationship with “heroine” - can you see how in your current state you are going to this woman to get what you need to feel whole, to GET your fix? When you are really ready again to have a serious relationship, you will be coming to it to GIVE.

You will achieve this state in due time, but for now, you need to heal - and it’s going to fucking hurt for a while.
Places one can learn this: BS Psych, MS Psych-mental health counseling, Alcoholics Anonymous.

All of what you say is true.
My most healthy functioning relationships have only been healthy if both parties give more than they intend to receive.
My rebound relationships where I was getting something desperately needed ended in catastrophe.
 
RickyBlobby

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@RickyBlobby, DC really expressed it perfectly - and this post from him illustrates the maturity I am speaking of.

Humans are built to be social creatures and desire at least some companionship. BUT we cannot create high-functioning, healthy relationships when they are built on a foundation of “gimme”. You have to get to a state where you desire a relationship because you have love to share, not needs that must be met. Do you have a best friend just because he has a sweet boat? Of course not - you go boating together BECAUSE of your great friendship. Nobody will have a good time boating with an asshole, and that’s what will happen in a codependent relationship.

Reread your post above about what you want and replace the words about a relationship with “heroine” - can you see how in your current state you are going to this woman to get what you need to feel whole, to GET your fix? When you are really ready again to have a serious relationship, you will be coming to it to GIVE.

You will achieve this state in due time, but for now, you need to heal - and it’s going to fucking hurt for a while.

You saying you dont think there is any way to make this work?
 
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Wobmarvel

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You saying you dont think there is any way to make this work?
I think the point is that it's too soon to be worrying about trying to make something work. Take time out, like lots of time. If this is meant to be it will happen later.
 
SkRaw85

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Just found this goldmine. Single, trest, college campus, are you fahking kidding me?!?! SUBBED!
 
Hyde

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You saying you dont think there is any way to make this work?
I think the point is that it's too soon to be worrying about trying to make something work. Take time out, like lots of time. If this is meant to be it will happen later.
100% this.

That’s what I meant when I said go camping by yourself. Start reading something. Practice meditation drills. Get serious about your time in the gym. Maybe focus on cooking/meal prep, or any other hobby that intrigues you. But spend time developing yourself. Time to think, grow, heal.
 
SkRaw85

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Hell yeah bro time to live it up. Hit the gym eat big and lay out by the pool on the daily. Swarming with hot young ass. Gawd lol I just need to get my mojo back in full swing and it's already up after less than a week on trest. I
Prolly cruise on trest D after this vial of ace is out and run primo or DhB the rest of the summer. I just want a feel good cycle so probably primo 400 trest 100 and 3iu of high. Maybe indefinately.

I get depressed still but dude I get excited thinking about how much more I'm gonna be living from here on out.

Got a road trip planned end of June and 2-3 booty calls on the way, probably a 3sum, MX nationals at red but and my ho.ie in Chicage has a fucking sick boat were gonna take out on lake michigan.

Might stop in Colorado on the way home to pick up some blue dream and do white water rafting.

And no more nagging bitch to ruin my time. Its gonna be a good one fellas. I need to find a scale and weigh in. Before long. If I can put on and keep 20lbs and keep the fat off I think I'll be happy there. I hope lol. I've kinda got a baby face so I dont think 250lbs would look great on me.
Holler at me if you make it to CO and need primo blue dream. My buddy has a 10,000 sq foot operation and a super delish blue dream crop always in rotation.
 
Wobmarvel

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Holler at me if you make it to CO and need primo blue dream. My buddy has a 10,000 sq foot operation and a super delish blue dream crop always in rotation.
Never thought I would say this but this would be much healthier for you at this stage in your life.
 
mixedup

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Im in Mississippi now and working nights starting tonight. My sleep is gonna suck and my workouts are gonna be shyte for the next 2 weeks so I'm gonna drop trest down to 10mg a day and just eat as clean as possible to avoid accumulating any fat.
Modafinil if you can get a script it's used alot for shift workers
 
mixedup

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Im in Mississippi now and working nights starting tonight. My sleep is gonna suck and my workouts are gonna be shyte for the next 2 weeks so I'm gonna drop trest down to 10mg a day and just eat as clean as possible to avoid accumulating any fat.
Modafinil if you can get a script it's used alot for shift workers
 
RickyBlobby

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Holler at me if you make it to CO and need primo blue dream. My buddy has a 10,000 sq foot operation and a super delish blue dream crop always in rotation.
Fukkin A bro!!!!!
 
Matthersby

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Ugh. Bitch hit me up 9am this morning to say GM. I woke up about 4pm, replied hey I'm up hows your day going. Read, but no reply 6hrs later. Blocked her, fukk the dumb shyt. FML
That “read” feature on iPhone should never have existed. I disabled mine, but before that, I constantly would try to read the entire preview so It wouldn’t actually show up that I read it, if it was someone that I didn’t want to think I was blowing them off.
Too exhausting that feature...


She sounds like a serious pain, as cool and hot as she was.
 
RickyBlobby

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Wow. Picked up an awesome Ebook

Loads of amazing eye opening advice

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Hyde

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Good, you aren’t ready for a relationship right now anyway.

And take all the writing on masculinity with a grain of salt. Chew it over for yourself and spit out the bone. I see good and bad advice in that excerpt. Good: explaining the addicted lover symptoms. Bad: telling you a good lover loves fine art, GTFO. Loving something because somebody says you should just makes you a sheep. Having passion for some things is indeed healthy though. But don’t mix the notion of living passionately with appreciation for modern or classic culture.

Everything with a grain of salt - even everything I say, they’re just bropinions.
 
RickyBlobby

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Yeah I get it man. I'm pretty good at pulling helpful knowledge out of stuff. I dont think he is necessarily saying you must love fine art, but more so find stuff you are passionate about and learn to find life in them.

One of the 7 strategies he talks about is going on a 3 day camping trip, just like you recommended, lol

It really is an excellent book
 
RickyBlobby

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Got off work at 6am and drove to the beach, sat there and took it all in for a couple hours.
 
Hyde

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Yeah I get it man. I'm pretty good at pulling helpful knowledge out of stuff. I dont think he is necessarily saying you must love fine art, but more so find stuff you are passionate about and learn to find life in them.

One of the 7 strategies he talks about is going on a 3 day camping trip, just like you recommended, lol

It really is an excellent book
Sounds like you have the right idea about it all!
 
RickyBlobby

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mixedup

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That book part looks pretty good to me as long things you take the parts that work for you.
 
Matthersby

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That book part looks pretty good to me as long things you take the parts that work for you.
Yes. You’ll benefit more in the long run if you do it the way Hyde and that book have mentioned. But what sold me, and this is no slight against you, is your response to her when she doesn’t text back. It’s kind of what he’s been talking about. It’s damn near impossible to be in your situation(which I’ve been in minus the decade marriage) and be fully able to try to make someone happier than they make you. It takes a minute to get back there. And that may come from you doing you for a while and working on healing and self improvement. No need to jump into something that’s going to derail you and be a take-take consuming fling.
Do I think you should find something fun and low key or a solid booty cal”? Or even a couple divorce’s that have a lot to offer in the bedroom just so they can feel desired again. **** yes. That’s my favorite morale booster after something shitty like what you’ve experienced. Something that no one can get hurt from or emotionally demanding.
I see no problem with that at all.
I think a lot of guys are trying to help and giving different advice, but when it comes down to it, have some fun, nobody HAS to be celibate post breakup but Hyde speaks the truth that it’s not the time to jump into something to get your endless needs met to fill a void. You’ve got to let that bullshit heal but I’d be crazy trying to tell you to just forego your newfound singleness and not go out and get some ass. I certainly wouldn’t.
But I’ve been lucky in that I specifically look for someone that just wants what I want: to have a little fun and feel wanted. I highly recommend a cute 6 or 7 TOPS that had either a porn addict ex or a neglectful workaholic. They’ll give you the best sex of your life and mail you a thank you card after and won’t give a damn if you call them again.
 
RickyBlobby

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Yes. You’ll benefit more in the long run if you do it the way Hyde and that book have mentioned. But what sold me, and this is no slight against you, is your response to her when she doesn’t text back. It’s kind of what he’s been talking about. It’s damn near impossible to be in your situation(which I’ve been in minus the decade marriage) and be fully able to try to make someone happier than they make you. It takes a minute to get back there. And that may come from you doing you for a while and working on healing and self improvement. No need to jump into something that’s going to derail you and be a take-take consuming fling.
Do I think you should find something fun and low key or a solid booty cal”? Or even a couple divorce’s that have a lot to offer in the bedroom just so they can feel desired again. **** yes. That’s my favorite morale booster after something shitty like what you’ve experienced. Something that no one can get hurt from or emotionally demanding.
I see no problem with that at all.
I think a lot of guys are trying to help and giving different advice, but when it comes down to it, have some fun, nobody HAS to be celibate post breakup but Hyde speaks the truth that it’s not the time to jump into something to get your endless needs met to fill a void. You’ve got to let that bullshit heal but I’d be crazy trying to tell you to just forego your newfound singleness and not go out and get some ass. I certainly wouldn’t.
But I’ve been lucky in that I specifically look for someone that just wants what I want: to have a little fun and feel wanted. I highly recommend a cute 6 or 7 TOPS that had either a porn addict ex or a neglectful workaholic. They’ll give you the best sex of your life and mail you a thank you card after and won’t give a damn if you call them again.
You lost me at 6 or 7
 
Matthersby

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You lost me at 6 or 7
**** 9s and 10s. I hate them. They suck. They’re shitty lays. And they’re entitled and selfish. I haven’t gone over an 8 since 2009 and I’m a happy man. Plus they are all gonna be 4s in another 10-15. I want the ones that I’m still gonna be happy with when we are old.
So, if the goal for me is for sex: 6-7
It’s is for marriage: 6-7
That’s where I live. Doesn’t even bug me when I see or meet a 9-10 I could easily get since I’ve been there and was miserable.
 
Matthersby

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Kidding. Yeah you've probably got a good point. Young hot bitches be crazy.

Can I at least fukk her? Lol she won't leave me alone
Totally. There’s got to be 9s and 10s that are good in bed. I jus never find them.
 
hairygrandpa

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Totally. There’s got to be 9s and 10s that are good in bed. I jus never find them.
9s-10s? They are all here, with me. For sex: 4s (like: awesome body but a lazy eye). They are awesome, because they don't know when the chance for sex comes again -and they are grateful.
 
RickyBlobby

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She all “sorry my kid had the phone, don’t block me!” ?
YES!!!!!!!! And then I dont hear from her till 10 oclock the next night. Like at least drop me a line a couple times a day. I'm ready to say f it and re-download tinder. Although that's not my style when I tell somebody they can trust me when it comes to whatever.
Like, I'm not trying to be super serious. I'm good texting a few times a day, fucking 1-2x a week and taking it slow like that for the next year till she graduated. Then see how we feel.

But I have a feeling somebody else snuck in there during our 2 day hiatus. I'm not gonna tey not to let it bother me anymore. Imm start hitting on other women again. Whatever happens happens.
 
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RickyBlobby

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9s-10s? They are all here, with me. For sex: 4s (like: awesome body but a lazy eye). They are awesome, because they don't know when the chance for sex comes again -and they are grateful.
Nice body with a lazy eye
 
mixedup

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Hey RB another how is the trest going I have to vials at home and was thinking of picking some more
 
RickyBlobby

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Hey RB another how is the trest going I have to vials at home and was thinking of picking some more
Going good gyno is hard to control tho. Not going back up until I get ralox and caber
 
RickyBlobby

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RickyBlobby

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More good shyt
 

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RickyBlobby

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More good shyt that is somewhat readable lol

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RickyBlobby

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Tinder gold byotches....Its on now
 
RickyBlobby

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You gotta watch the whole thing... Some funny shyt
Lol yeah that's good shyt. Sad but true unfortunately.

Yeah looks like me and old girl ain't talkin no more. For the best.

On the bright side a really cute girl I chaperoned 5 years ago on her senior trip hit me up saying she wanted to hang out as soon as I get back to Baton Rouge. This one has been stewing for a while too.
 
RickyBlobby

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Excellent article talking about the exact thing I have been suffering from my entire adult life.. co dependence on a single woman... typically the wrong women too

 
Wobmarvel

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Lol yeah that's good shyt. Sad but true unfortunately.

Yeah looks like me and old girl ain't talkin no more. For the best.

On the bright side a really cute girl I chaperoned 5 years ago on her senior trip hit me up saying she wanted to hang out as soon as I get back to Baton Rouge. This one has been stewing for a while too.
Just stop, stop. This woman has messed you around.

The bright side would be you deciding this is the hint to leave women alone for a bit and listen to some of the advice on here.

Instead you have already picked your next online woman obsession.

I realise I'm not your dad and it's purely up to you what you do but you asked for advice and most of the best advice on here was to leave them alone for a while. I think you are just waiting for the guys that will say "great, go chase that tail" you want the advice to fit your already made up mind.

It's a bit like those guys that say "what do you think of this guys, I'm gonna run a 6 week dbol only cycle" fifty guys say don't do it, the guy will keep fishing for the one comment that says "I did a dbol only cycle and got okay gains" jumps on that one comment and is like "it's on!" his mind is already made up before he asks for the advice.
 
RickyBlobby

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Just stop, stop. This woman has messed you around.

The bright side would be you deciding this is the hint to leave women alone for a bit and listen to some of the advice on here.

Instead you have already picked your next online woman obsession.

I realise I'm not your dad and it's purely up to you what you do but you asked for advice and most of the best advice on here was to leave them alone for a while. I think you are just waiting for the guys that will say "great, go chase that tail" you want the advice to fit your already made up mind.

It's a bit like those guys that say "what do you think of this guys, I'm gonna run a 6 week dbol only cycle" fifty guys say don't do it, the guy will keep fishing for the one comment that says "I did a dbol only cycle and got okay gains" jumps on that one comment and is like "it's on!" his mind is already made up before he asks for the advice.
Pipe down there wobbly one. I think you have the wrong idea bro. I'm not letting myself fall into the same trap. I have read, re-read, and re re read the article on oneitis and I'm gonna do everything in my power to stay out of that mindset.

Things are done between this girl and I number one.

This other girl doesnt live anywhere near me. No feels. She just wants to have fun and that's all its gonna be.

I started talking back to a girl I dated when I was a teenager too. I always liked her a lot, found her on FB and she is still cute af I was shocked. Anyway she seems real into me but my eyes have been opened lol. No more oneitis for me. I have set a goal to NOT have another steady girlfriend for at least a year or until I've been with 20 women, whichever comes first. Goals brah

I'm telling you these ebooks I have been reading have really opened my eyes and made me feel alot better about myself. Reading. Fukk yeah
 
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RickyBlobby

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I've started setting goals for myself as well. If anyone wants to add any advice on these I'm all ears

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