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keep on coughing what is the problem

phasar said:
really??? what can i say. i hang my head in shame. *goes to the end of the roid monkey fan club lineup*

how about a 9.5 + rep points then?
Click to expand...


Now that's more like it bro!! And who knows maybe one of these days we'll get a visit from the "real roid monkey".
 
hey Phasar and Yeahright thanks for the points!! guess there's a payoff to being a "roid monkey" fan after all ... i've even started throwing weights across the gym.. not 100lbs yet but i'm working my way up... after all Saluu did say that "chicks look for two things in side the club when they are drunk who is the biggest roid monkey if you have a big gorilla chest and arms the size of any black guys banana down under consider yourself laid." i even tried flapping like a chicken but it hasn't really helped my game so far i think i need more BF or should I say "water retention"
 
I just found this thread, and it made me scared to touch another anabolic again. His pictures scared me. But his posts are pure comedy.
 
PVSkyHigh said:
I just found this thread, and it made me scared to touch another anabolic again. His pictures scared me. But his posts are pure comedy.
Click to expand...

If you are scared to touch another anabolic due to this thread then how smart are you???:trout:
 
1ad man said:
spit death you have broken board rules bud no posting of other members pictures without their permission. This is sad my reputation points are going down from this trash talking i guess rants sell . just like sex sells. anyways im on 1000mg of test im horny as hell on this stuff im constantly on limewire downloading all the possible gangbang pornos possbile. im jerking off around the clock aint nothing coming out except for that excess juice i been injecting in my hard ass roid monkey ass.

By the way im a driving instructor down here in canada and my last student was a blonde hot as hell 19 yrs old and was wearing a mini skirt half the time i wasnt even looking up ahead but rather between her legs . I guess being the teacher has some advantages maybe i could teach her some positions we use in the jungle .

Anthony roberts is a moron and steriod.com is too strict they ban you for the stupidest reasons. If your 275 i guess the whole world hits you except for the girls in the club.

Half the time when i ask a girl to dance with me she says yes because she is scared her boyfriend is gonna get beat up by the monkey . Remember do anything to get laid if it means by the ladies a drink do it , if it means putting those ghb drug pills in her drink do it. If it means telling her your roid monkey ass is harder than her nipples do it.

I once told this girl that the monkey banana was 17 inches cold when we got to the hotel she was so horny and ready then when i took my underwear off she realized my balls were the size of nipples that is when you know your roid monkey.

remember life is a box of vials and amps. Juice up or shut up.
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Sorry guys, I was in need of a good laugh so I decide to bring this one back to life. All the other good threads initiated by saluu have been shut down. I wonder if The Roid Monkey is still alive.... What an idiot:fool2:
 
man , i agree..........that post is definately one of the funniest things i've read on the internet. especially since we can put a face to the words....
 
animalXXX said:
hey Phasar and Yeahright thanks for the points!! guess there's a payoff to being a "roid monkey" fan after all ... i've even started throwing weights across the gym.. not 100lbs yet but i'm working my way up... after all Saluu did say that "chicks look for two things in side the club when they are drunk who is the biggest roid monkey if you have a big gorilla chest and arms the size of any black guys banana down under consider yourself laid." i even tried flapping like a chicken but it hasn't really helped my game so far i think i need more BF or should I say "water retention"
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that is just too funny. dude: you probably need more BF. go for the fat! go for the fat! girls dig it
 
Leggo my Ego said:
Actually, my gold membership initiation is right around the corner!! :head:
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Glad to hear it, then we can teach you the secret handshake.....just don't follow Jayhawkk if he asks you to come with him for the "initiation."
 
Innings Eater said:
Are you on an ACE inhibitor for high blood pressure perhaps? These drugs are notorious for their unsolicited cough side effect.
Click to expand...

1ad man (the idiot who started this thread) is long gone, so he wont be replying to your question. I just brought this thread back to life to give myself and other board members a nice little chuckle
 
Innings Eater said:
Are you on an ACE inhibitor for high blood pressure perhaps? These drugs are notorious for their unsolicited cough side effect.
Click to expand...

It's very kind of you to offer considered advice....but if you review this thread from the beginning you'll see that the initiator of the thread was banned long ago (for good reason) and his insane rambling posts have become legend.
 
For good reason?!

Is that validation finally after all the grief I got for banning him?!! lololol

It had to be done. I am the chosen one.
 
When Saluu the roid monkey speaks of his fans he must be speaking of me, how can you not be fan of this guy? He is hilarious. Hearing his name alone leaves me laughing.:toofunny:
 
Since people are still reading this i'm gona post some stuff that i've found on a dif forum posted by none other than the Roid Monkey. Enjoy:

"welcome to the fan club you will get free roid monkey porno videos where i screw hooker and get my hairy chest shaved at the same time roid monkey style, and if she aint down with monkey policy i think im gonna have to inject her with eq and add more veins to her already cocaine addict body. The last thing a hooker who is hooked on drugs needs is more roid monkey eq and more veins sticking out of her neck. cant ban me for this my fan club is too huge they will defend their monkey from canada
im still here the monkey never sleeps. you will finally see pictures of the biggest monkey on the planet after i do my cycle which is like this right now no lie this is for real

1-4 tren acetate 150 eod
1-4 dbol 50mg ed looking to go higher i want anadrol results
1-10 test cypionate 250mg may go up to 500
1-22 sustanon 500mg a week
4-14 tren e 250mg a week may go up to 500
18-24 winny 100mg ed
post cycle therapy clomid 300 day 1
weeks 1-4 100mg clomid ed

i know this is crazy but i wanna hit 330 im 250 right now i wanna gain 80 pds


my sister is getting married soon and i know they may hire security but i plan to be bigger than the guard and be the ultimate roid monkey guard i want people to sigh in shock when they see the monkey .monkey salutes you coming in about 6 month the monkey at 330 pds 6 1 raw muscle this is actuaaly 3 cycles in one only one guy can do this without dying because he has tiny balls and is the monkey from canada the roid monkey saluu


monkey went to safeway bp was 200 high i went to the doctors right away i was wearing a muscle shirt and he asked me what i did for a living i told him and then he asked was i into sport or stress related things and he told me to take off my clothes i was scared you never know with these doctors last thing the monkey needs is a monkey style porno. Anyways i took off my shirt and he goes gee your a big guy and bp was 190 he said that is high 120 is normal. Then out of nowhere he ask me questions and he must have seen the marks on my shoulder on the delts im guess or just couldnt stand my sheer size and he goes do you do steroids i **** in my pants. he told me to stop taking roids and it is bad for you . the monkey almost lost it i felt like kicking his ass inside the place and ask him for a change do you have roid monkey medical insurance. but i kept my cool and told him kindly that i take once in a while little does he know im a roid monkey and on this **** 24 seven. he said my heart will enlarge and stuff like that i was about to tell him my sex drive is through the roof on 1000 mg of test a week and i wanted to bang his blonde receptionst. inside his office and he could watch the monkey in action. anyways he told me to go to the lab get a urine test no point in that because if they used a microscope all they would find in my piss is monkey piss. so i teared up the lab sheet and didnt even go and he gave me free samples of altace for bp i have no idea what that is but said it would keep my bp down good thing now i can save money and by more juice. **** these doctors of so stupid i asked him im on hawthorne berry for the bp he was like what is that i though he was suppose to know his ****. anyways this story is true like all my stories and when i got home even with 200 bp i jammed some 6 dbol pills with water. i dont care if my bp goes to 300 because the monkey needs to grow grow each day. you know the doc gave me a lecture and **** and i though he was just suppose to tap the roid monkey on the back and say go monkey go. . Another thing is pissing me off are these zits and pimples i got on my back it makes me look like **** thank god the only tool that doesnt have a pimple is the one that i would have used on that blonde receptionist. how do i get rid of these monkey pimples. okay gotta go man sleep time im gonna eat my bananas and sleep bye"
 
well here's the story of the monkey in his own words:

"here is a true story and it is saluu story . i went to india to marry this hot girl and once she married me she took off once she got to canada and i found out later that she was cheating on me and had a boyfriend back home and married me just for the green card i was severly depressed . than i got my mind into bodybuilding and i always loved it but now i love it even more i think this is the greatest sport in the world. The monkey couldnt give two hoots about that whore to my ex suck it . i started resorting to drugs at first i started drinking heavy and started doing marijuana then i realized instead of ruining my life and my health why dont i improve it and find another love bodybuilding i have always loved it. seeing arnold do joint and watching pumping iron was priceless. THen i started juciing and became a roid monkey . now i cant live without juice. this is the story of the roid monkey now it is not a bout the *****es it is about the monkey grow monkey grow. My plan is to hit 330 pds and kick my ex ass and beat her boyfriend up like brett hart beat up vince mcmahon. and if i have to go to jail i will consider it a gift. this is true bro im not making this stuff up i should have known she was a whore lets do doggy style the loser used to say. then one night i was like the energizer bunny kept pumping her hard and she goes saluu i dont have that much stamina. i go well start running around do cardio and increase because the monkey needs his 3 hr sex time. what a loser. this is how i became a roid monkey never trust a whore but trust a monkey."
 
haha Yet another wild thread here at AM. This is two in one day, we're on a role. lol Well, two that I've sat through and read. This guy has a few issues, huh? Understatement of the year right? I'll say this for that... Pure comedy gold! Keep up the good work Saluu!
 
say dawg when the roid monkey with big gorrilla chest rolls up in the gym and grunts doing 20lb dumb bell kick backs them gym ladies be wettin they pussies.
 
animalXXX said:
Since people are still reading this i'm gona post some stuff that i've found on a dif forum posted by none other than the Roid Monkey. Enjoy:

"welcome to the fan club you will get free roid monkey porno videos where i screw hooker and get my hairy chest shaved at the same time roid monkey style, and if she aint down with monkey policy i think im gonna have to inject her with eq and add more veins to her already cocaine addict body. The last thing a hooker who is hooked on drugs needs is more roid monkey eq and more veins sticking out of her neck. cant ban me for this my fan club is too huge they will defend their monkey from canada
im still here the monkey never sleeps. you will finally see pictures of the biggest monkey on the planet after i do my cycle which is like this right now no lie this is for real

1-4 tren acetate 150 eod
1-4 dbol 50mg ed looking to go higher i want anadrol results
1-10 test cypionate 250mg may go up to 500
1-22 sustanon 500mg a week
4-14 tren e 250mg a week may go up to 500
18-24 winny 100mg ed
post cycle therapy clomid 300 day 1
weeks 1-4 100mg clomid ed

i know this is crazy but i wanna hit 330 im 250 right now i wanna gain 80 pds


my sister is getting married soon and i know they may hire security but i plan to be bigger than the guard and be the ultimate roid monkey guard i want people to sigh in shock when they see the monkey .monkey salutes you coming in about 6 month the monkey at 330 pds 6 1 raw muscle this is actuaaly 3 cycles in one only one guy can do this without dying because he has tiny balls and is the monkey from canada the roid monkey saluu


monkey went to safeway bp was 200 high i went to the doctors right away i was wearing a muscle shirt and he asked me what i did for a living i told him and then he asked was i into sport or stress related things and he told me to take off my clothes i was scared you never know with these doctors last thing the monkey needs is a monkey style porno. Anyways i took off my shirt and he goes gee your a big guy and bp was 190 he said that is high 120 is normal. Then out of nowhere he ask me questions and he must have seen the marks on my shoulder on the delts im guess or just couldnt stand my sheer size and he goes do you do steroids i **** in my pants. he told me to stop taking roids and it is bad for you . the monkey almost lost it i felt like kicking his ass inside the place and ask him for a change do you have roid monkey medical insurance. but i kept my cool and told him kindly that i take once in a while little does he know im a roid monkey and on this **** 24 seven. he said my heart will enlarge and stuff like that i was about to tell him my sex drive is through the roof on 1000 mg of test a week and i wanted to bang his blonde receptionst. inside his office and he could watch the monkey in action. anyways he told me to go to the lab get a urine test no point in that because if they used a microscope all they would find in my piss is monkey piss. so i teared up the lab sheet and didnt even go and he gave me free samples of altace for bp i have no idea what that is but said it would keep my bp down good thing now i can save money and by more juice. **** these doctors of so stupid i asked him im on hawthorne berry for the bp he was like what is that i though he was suppose to know his ****. anyways this story is true like all my stories and when i got home even with 200 bp i jammed some 6 dbol pills with water. i dont care if my bp goes to 300 because the monkey needs to grow grow each day. you know the doc gave me a lecture and **** and i though he was just suppose to tap the roid monkey on the back and say go monkey go. . Another thing is pissing me off are these zits and pimples i got on my back it makes me look like **** thank god the only tool that doesnt have a pimple is the one that i would have used on that blonde receptionist. how do i get rid of these monkey pimples. okay gotta go man sleep time im gonna eat my bananas and sleep bye"
Click to expand...

wow. this guy must seriously be dead at this point.
 
So a guy posts that his girlfriend's ex wants to kick his ass. Here's Saluu's response to that:
"go tyson style eat his ears first bad talk him it works say im a roid monkey im gonna kicks your ass so bad your gonna be in er hooked up to monkey piss. then kick him in the balls it dont matter if cheating the guy has 50 pds on you. If i was fighting a big guy no questions asked i would knee him in the balls otherwise your gonna get **** kicked. If someone does that to me no effect because i dont have any balls anymore they are the size of peanuts now. do it monkey style jump on his back and take the classic oe old english 8 ball and smash it on his head you will lose only 8 dollars, then kick him in the balls. and the tko move punch him in the adams apple lightly so you dont kill him if you go to jail i will send your gear there in the mean time i will bang your chick in the saluu monkey jungle and my porno well be called my boyfriend aint man enough but the monkey is. remember if you fight him go far the balls dont be a coward fight him like a lion even if you get **** kicked dont back down. if you do dont ever come on this forum and dont ever inject yourself wit roids. roids well not make you man enough balls is what makes you have balls its all heart . i had this one guy talking trash he was smaller than me he kept on chatting and saying im a kickboxer and **** i didnt fool for it let him bark i kicked his ass so bad his chick came at me she pepper sprayed me didnt effect me i dont know why i didnt feel **** she was native. i guess i was so drunk and hammered i didnt feel it. Funny thing is about 4 months later i banged that same native chick when she was hammered she had no idea who i was i love native girls they a minority because they are the only ones that are whores. peace roid monkey put or shut up ."



if you like it trow some point my way, cuz research takes time :)
 
Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Edit: We need a Saluu the roid monkey thingy. Like this...
except a fat monkey.

:bruce2:
 
i'll pay $40 usd if he attempts stand up commedy. but the show must last an hour. after the initial 20 minutes of rambling, i want to see what he'll have left in the tank in the remaining 40 minutes.

first 20 minutes: roid monkey rambling/teachings
next 20 scratches head and flexes muscles (fat)
last 20: panics to finish the show. attempts to pin self and show that he is a true monkey by slamming own head against wooden planks whilst singing canadian anthem.
 
animalXXX said:
So a guy posts that his girlfriend's ex wants to kick his ass. Here's Saluu's response to that:
"go tyson style eat his ears first bad talk him it works say im a roid monkey im gonna kicks your ass so bad your gonna be in er hooked up to monkey piss. then kick him in the balls it dont matter if cheating the guy has 50 pds on you. If i was fighting a big guy no questions asked i would knee him in the balls otherwise your gonna get **** kicked. If someone does that to me no effect because i dont have any balls anymore they are the size of peanuts now. do it monkey style jump on his back and take the classic oe old english 8 ball and smash it on his head you will lose only 8 dollars, then kick him in the balls. and the tko move punch him in the adams apple lightly so you dont kill him if you go to jail i will send your gear there in the mean time i will bang your chick in the saluu monkey jungle and my porno well be called my boyfriend aint man enough but the monkey is. remember if you fight him go far the balls dont be a coward fight him like a lion even if you get **** kicked dont back down. if you do dont ever come on this forum and dont ever inject yourself wit roids. roids well not make you man enough balls is what makes you have balls its all heart . i had this one guy talking trash he was smaller than me he kept on chatting and saying im a kickboxer and **** i didnt fool for it let him bark i kicked his ass so bad his chick came at me she pepper sprayed me didnt effect me i dont know why i didnt feel **** she was native. i guess i was so drunk and hammered i didnt feel it. Funny thing is about 4 months later i banged that same native chick when she was hammered she had no idea who i was i love native girls they a minority because they are the only ones that are whores. peace roid monkey put or shut up ."



if you like it trow some point my way, cuz research takes time :)
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lol.. i like how he seems to show off the fact that his balls are "the size of peanuts". you shoud try and find the pics from that other board of him flexing his 30% bf arms.
 
"This is how I became a roid monkey. Never trust a whore but trust a monkey."

More pricless wisdom from saluu the roid monkey. This guy is the best!

Oh and can we get a link to the board Saluu is at right now? I must join this board!
 
id like to know that too because im pretty sure he's banned everywhere lol but it dont matter for the roid monkey as long as he has his pins and juice he grows big and women flock to gorilla chest
 
As long as the women see the big roid monkey slam his 110 dbells to the ground and his gorilla testicles the size of peanuts, they'll know he's the big roid monkey SALUU!!
 
well you guys asked for pics, although you've probably seen them before, but here they are again along side with some words of wisdom:
"okay i wanted to show you guys pictures of me here im at 6 1 260 and to tell you the truth this is week and half of my cycle when i took these pictures so the injectables have not kicked in. it is tren , sustanton 250, tren e , winny at the end , test cypoinate , fronloading with dbol and m1t i am bloated as hell. Let me know what you guys think my strenghts and weaknesses please keep it positive . I know im not the hugest guy on this board this is just for my fans so enjoy this is saluu the monkey The reason i post pictures is for the fans but also i wanna know what are my strenghts and weaknesses please fans critizicize me and praise me as well on what i need to work on . "



Thanks y'all for the points and hey as long as you keep them coming i'll keep the posts coming :)
 

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Who can find the most recent post on any board of this saluu character? I will rep them, consider it a roid monkey scavenger hunt! haha find him and bring him back to the board LOL!
 
"to the people that dissed my ass you all wanna look like me and be me look at the popularity i have acheived here. im going for the lee priest Look at those lou forreigrno traps . To the people that supported me thanks . i am gonna do the monkey way and trust me 260 and 20 percent that is still 200 pds of muscle probably equal to what some of you weight. You can beat me on any shot except for one my lats they are wide really wide i will leave you in da dust just like coleman said lights out game over . i will post my lat shot than anybody here post there see if they can compare to the great salu. If i scared any of the roid monkey fans im sorry. Im just from different jungle down under.
i woke up in the morning and eat 4 orea cookies and then jammed chocolate milk , and then ate 1 whole hamburger this is not an average day and then i jammed 52 grams of protein and 152 carbs and 900 caloreis of heavyweightgainer 900. If i eat subway most of the time i eat a footlong meatball sub. I got a plan im gonna get my diet a little more strict most of my calores come from heavyweightgainer 900 and i will take 5 or 6 scoops a day . calories would be 6000 protein around 300 carbs around 500 .Remember not all carbs are fat they are used as energy for working out the extra is stored as fat and good fats can never hurt you infact the build muscle by increasing. Im good at cutting up i went down from 280 to 240 in about 3 months . mind you i did take eca im taking dbol 30mg and m1t 20mg and test cypionate and sustanon once in a while . i usually get in around 1000mg of test a week and tren is eod 150mg . i got winny at the end to harden me up and get rid of the water. i am thinking of going 2000 test a week. I am also holding lots of water atleast 10pds right now. monkey dont like to sweat but now im gonna hit that cardio. I need to lower bodyfat i know but i can always do that later once i pass 330 . I figure with dbol i will put on 20 pds and m1t 20pds and test c 20 pds and with 20 amps of sus 20 to 30 pds and tren a and tren e 20 pds and winny 5pds grandtotal of new added muscle 105 t0 110 pds .right now im about 260 and slap on 100 more pds and that will be 360 in da house i have just started my cycle not even a week."
 
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