How much time does it take to fall in love?

EasyEJL said:
That is so true. Thats why I rated mine at an 8. Its no hollywood romance, and I wouldn't die without her, but its real love in that we both have made that commitment to make it work. We've have been together 12 years now (after me having 1 failed marriage). We've decided that each other is the one we will be with till we die, and thats what I call love. Calling it love but it falling apart in 2, 4, 6, 10 years means it wasn't really love, just infatuation mxed with lust.

And generally I don't agree with what ReaperX says ;)
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I have to also add to this, me and my girlfriend have been through up and downs...a lot of times, and I feel like during one of these cycles that is when some people decide to split on their relationship rather than work things out. Some of the most difficult periods in my relationship with my girlfriend have been the most trying and straining, but we both made a committment to work through it and to be supportive good or bad. A lot of people I know and even my friends maybe go through a couple of these rollercoaster rides before calling it quits.

Someone who will be there both good and bad is not common in fact it is EXTREMELY RARE that you find someone who is like this that's why the divorce rate is so high (among other things too).
 
Mrs. Gimpy! said:
what can i say b5150? it may be considered arrogance to some, but i can not help but to be damn proud of myself :)
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You have much to be proud of. Your father is likely very proud of you as well. As a father of a 19 yo daughter who is undertaking her nursing courses I can also appreciate what you have accomplished. :)
 
My wife and I just split up a week after our ten year wedding anniversary, so please disregard any advice from earlier.
 
Jayhawkk said:
As in yesterday.
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Damn Jay! Very sorry to hear that. I've been there twice now with ex's. The second one really hurt and I'm still feeling it now a little.

Was there a dealbreaker? Or do you both just need some time to cool off and work through things?
 
Jayhawkk said:
I think it's done but so far my thoughts on where things are, are not too accurate. If you know what I mean.
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I know exactly what you mean. Stick by your close friends and family. Sometimes they have a better view of everything (in these sitautions) than you do and their advice and support can be valuable.

Good luck man! I remember that pain very clearly, but at least it doesn't hurt anymore. Does that make sense?
 
Yeah, i'm trying to take it one step at a time right now. I wasn't able to sleep the first night and lastnight I actually got about 4 hours so at least that's a positive.
 
Jayhawkk said:
Yeah, i'm trying to take it one step at a time right now. I wasn't able to sleep the first night and lastnight I actually got about 4 hours so at least that's a positive.
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hang in there bro
 
Jayhawkk said:
Yeah, i'm trying to take it one step at a time right now. I wasn't able to sleep the first night and lastnight I actually got about 4 hours so at least that's a positive.
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Bro this is ridiculous... I hope things get better for you... I found what you lost I think. I know it's not the best thing to be told in your situation, but pray about it man, God will take care of ya.
 
Well love as a feeling can happen almost instantly,love as a verb/choice takes work but can also start just as fast.It just depends where you are in your selfish/selfless place in life.

Love as an action is putting the others persons wellbeing ahead of our own needs and interests and that is something that is decided day by day.Moment by moment even.

Ive been through 1 fall in love but not demonstrate the actions of love marriage.And well lets just say it was a great catylist for doing some soul searching.:D

I am now 7yrs into my relationship with my second wife and love as the action is the basis for our relationship.Feelings are nice but self sacrifice for another is what defines a true love relationship.This is what has gained respect and honor from my wife which is a ton more important than the butterflys.

JAY You will continue to be in my prayers.I wish you the best and through our pain we often times find our greatest purpose.
 
mmowry said:
Well love as a feeling can happen almost instantly,love as a verb/choice takes work but can also start just as fast.It just depends where you are in your selfish/selfless place in life.

Love as an action is putting the others persons wellbeing ahead of our own needs and interests and that is something that is decided day by day.Moment by moment even.

Ive been through 1 fall in love but not demonstrate the actions of love marriage.And well lets just say it was a great catylist for doing some soul searching.:D

I am now 7yrs into my relationship with my second wife and love as the action is the basis for our relationship.Feelings are nice but self sacrifice for another is what defines a true love relationship.This is what has gained respect and honor from my wife which is a ton more important than the butterflys.

JAY You will continue to be in my prayers.I wish you the best and through our pain we often times find our greatest purpose.
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You couldn't have put that any better. I am basically in the same situation and have gone through similar situations as you, and I agree, I couldn't be happier right now, I'm lost in emotion.

And the last paragraph... damn dude, that one is wayy to true. I would explain more, but I'm just gonna keep some private things private lol.
 
mmowry said:
Well love as a feeling can happen almost instantly,love as a verb/choice takes work but can also start just as fast.It just depends where you are in your selfish/selfless place in life.

Love as an action is putting the others persons wellbeing ahead of our own needs and interests and that is something that is decided day by day.Moment by moment even.

Ive been through 1 fall in love but not demonstrate the actions of love marriage.And well lets just say it was a great catylist for doing some soul searching.:D

I am now 7yrs into my relationship with my second wife and love as the action is the basis for our relationship.Feelings are nice but self sacrifice for another is what defines a true love relationship.This is what has gained respect and honor from my wife which is a ton more important than the butterflys.

JAY You will continue to be in my prayers.I wish you the best and through our pain we often times find our greatest purpose.
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Amen to that.
 
Jayhawkk said:
As in yesterday.
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I am in the process of this as we speak. Very hard. My wife told me on Mothers day that she is miserable, with no real reasoning. Its terrible, we have a 4.5 year old who has to be around the tension as we try to sort out if this will work
 
Jay, I'm going on my usual random extended Hiatus from the board starting at 12am local time. When I finally do come back, I want to hear all about you and your wife reconciling and want you back to your fabulously entertaining self. I won't have it any other way.


This is my last post until my return.. get to fixin'
 
motiv8er said:
SO everybody chime in, not lust here guys. How much time did it take for you to fall in love with your signifigant other and on a scale of 1-10, how happy are you? 10+ being you cant live without her.
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when i first met her.. 10, after about 5 months i was at 6, now a year later.... 2
 
kwyckemynd00 said:
So you fell in love right away, and then got to know her :P I think that's what most ppl do.
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yea, atleast i know im like that, whenever i first meet someone im all into her, like big time... then after awhile its gone... i always want what i cant have. sucks.. i wish i wasnt like that but i am.
 
Jayhawkk said:
My wife and I just split up a week after our ten year wedding anniversary, so please disregard any advice from earlier.
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Hawkky,

You know we still love you dude.
 
I still remember the first time I saw Chad! He walked out in a yellow polor shirt ( dont ask) and I did a double take! Biggest f**king sholders I have ever seen on a guy! He gave me the tipical *wink* and had me from there! Then I became a stalker on his ass! Kinda scary I know, but he hasnt left me yet ( crossed fingers haha ) so I can't be to bad!!!!

Love you Chad!
 
Ubiquitous said:
Jay, I'm going on my usual random extended Hiatus from the board starting at 12am local time. When I finally do come back, I want to hear all about you and your wife reconciling and want you back to your fabulously entertaining self. I won't have it any other way.


This is my last post until my return.. get to fixin'
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Crap, I only did 4 days. No pressure. Disregard.


Namaste.
 
NickyNoNames said:
yea, atleast i know im like that, whenever i first meet someone im all into her, like big time... then after awhile its gone... i always want what i cant have. sucks.. i wish i wasnt like that but i am.
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LOL I know that feeling. I was so whooped over this chick in college and I wanted her badly. I just lost the attraction and passion I had for her after 3-4 months. Sometimes what we want isn't what we thought it would be.
 
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