Building Back Up

I'm with you if I'm being honest.I've always been jealous of the overweight guys who dont look sloppy, just strongMy gyno and love handles drive me nuts.
I've just about made my peace with my gyno since I'm unwilling to have surgery, so the live handles gotta go. Then again, if I was huge, I probably wouldn't care much about that either. On the other hand, I'm also unwilling to buy even more pants (just had to buy 2 pairs of 36 jeans 😔), so I gotta get it together.
Not me, I am working on putting together my down payment for my Gyno surgery even at 50 give me 20 years of no gyno and it will easily be worth it. I have easily wasted 10g on mostly useless or very minimally effective supplements that didn't have a big pay out so I can't justify not spending it on something that will change my confidence level, comfort level and appearance so much for the positive now.
 
Not me, I am working on putting together my down payment for my Gyno surgery even at 50 give me 20 years of no gyno and it will easily be worth it. I have easily wasted 10g on mostly useless or very minimally effective supplements that didn't have a big pay out so I can't justify not spending it on something that will change my confidence level, comfort level and appearance so much for the positive now.
I hear ya. I'm also not a fan of being put under, so there's that. But I definitely understand wasting thousands on minimal effective supplements and would rather put it to good cause. If I make a surplus of money on my amc and crypto investments, that might be back on the table, but as of now, it's just not in the cards for me. How noticeable is yours when your very lean?
 
I hear ya. I'm also not a fan of being put under, so there's that. But I definitely understand wasting thousands on minimal effective supplements and would rather put it to good cause. If I make a surplus of money on my amc and crypto investments, that might be back on the table, but as of now, it's just not in the cards for me. How noticeable is yours when your very lean?
Well I haven't been very lean in about 4 years but even around 12% they were noticeable and bounce separately under my pecs when moving or jumping around. The points tend to go under the lip of my pec but just kind of hang off under them. I also think they have gotten worse as when I quit working out for a while I got sporadic on my shots and the fact I am getting older I think they have grown some. I won't know before I get back down around 12-15% but by that time I should be able to get the surgery.

If you look at my avatar closely you can see the whole outer bottom lip is still hidden by breast tissue and estrogen sensitive fat.
 
Well I haven't been very lean in about 4 years but even around 12% they were noticeable and bounce separately under my pecs when moving or jumping around. The points tend to go under the lip of my pec but just kind of hang off under them. I also think they have gotten worse as when I quit working out for a while I got sporadic on my shots and the fact I am getting older I think they have grown some. I won't know before I get back down around 12-15% but by that time I should be able to get the surgery.

If you look at my avatar closely you can see the whole outer bottom lip is still hidden by breast tissue and estrogen sensitive fat.
Gotcha. Super frustrating I know!
 
Gotcha. Super frustrating I know!
More importantly for me anyway is that I have had gyno since I started going into pre-puberty so it has been a lifelong insecurity of mine so shedding that will be amazing for me.

As a matter of fact what got me lifting when I was 12 was the girl I was infatuated with turned me down when I asked her to be my girl and for some reason felt it was necessary to tell me why. He reason was "I like guys who are in shape and not trying to be mean but you kind of have boobies like a girl..." I went home from the pool crying. My older sister was friends with the super jock from her high school and he was at the house. When he asked what was wrong he told me "Man just start lifting weights. You are already stocky so you will get really big muscles, and then no one will care." Then he brought me his old weight bench and concrete weights to work out with. The rest is history!
 
More importantly for me anyway is that I have had gyno since I started going into pre-puberty so it has been a lifelong insecurity of mine so shedding that will be amazing for me.

As a matter of fact what got me lifting when I was 12 was the girl I was infatuated with turned me down when I asked her to be my girl and for some reason felt it was necessary to tell me why. He reason was "I like guys who are in shape and not trying to be mean but you kind of have boobies like a girl..." I went home from the pool crying. My older sister was friends with the super jock from her high school and he was at the house. When he asked what was wrong he told me "Man just start lifting weights. You are already stocky so you will get really big muscles, and then no one will care." Then he brought me his old weight bench and concrete weights to work out with. The rest is history!
Holy smokes. Sorry man. I only had 1 friend day something to me once and it was after I already knew I had gyno about age 17, and wasn't that offensive. But that was cool of the super jock! I don't blame you for wanting to get rid of it they bad, I would too.
 
Holy smokes. Sorry man. I only had 1 friend day something to me once and it was after I already knew I had gyno about age 17, and wasn't that offensive. But that was cool of the super jock! I don't blame you for wanting to get rid of it they bad, I would too.
Yeah it was pretty rough, plus I don't want to have to fight my thick nature 100% of the time to stay in the single digits to keep them small enough you cant see them through my shirt at all times. I look good even have abs in the 15% range and would love to be able to just rock that or even 20% without having to worry about what I wear so they don't show.
 
Today's Workout:

BB Bench 8x175, 7x180, 6x185
Squat 3x235, 3x265
Cable Upright Row 12x20, 10x25, 8x30
OH Cable Extension 3x8x30
DB Curls 3x8x20's
Quoted the last workout to track progress.

Today:
BB Bench 3x5x185, set 4 amrap of 6 (possibly 1 rir)
Squat Top Set 3x275
BB Row 10x95, 2x8x115
Cable Upright Row 12x25, 10x30, 10x35
OH Tricep Extension 8x35, 7x35, 5x35
DB Curl 3x8x20's

Bench and squat progressing well. I think next bench workout I'll go for 4x6 of 185, unless anyone has a different recommendation. BB Row was likely RPE7 or 8, no big deal. Definitely picked the wrong weight of overhead cable extension since every set went to failure basically, but I may have not rested long enough either between sets. DB Curls are stuck...
 
Yeah it was pretty rough, plus I don't want to have to fight my thick nature 100% of the time to stay in the single digits to keep them small enough you cant see them through my shirt at all times. I look good even have abs in the 15% range and would love to be able to just rock that or even 20% without having to worry about what I wear so they don't show.
Ugh, I know the daily fight of what I'm going to wear to hide it. You're slowly talking me back into surgery 😆
 
Quoted the last workout to track progress.

Today:
BB Bench 3x5x185, set 4 amrap of 6 (possibly 1 rir)
Squat Top Set 3x275
BB Row 10x95, 2x8x115
Cable Upright Row 12x25, 10x30, 10x35
OH Tricep Extension 8x35, 7x35, 5x35
DB Curl 3x8x20's

Bench and squat progressing well. I think next bench workout I'll go for 4x6 of 185, unless anyone has a different recommendation. BB Row was likely RPE7 or 8, no big deal. Definitely picked the wrong weight of overhead cable extension since every set went to failure basically, but I may have not rested long enough either between sets. DB Curls are stuck...
You increased your bench volume quite a bit this session so it goes to say that you increased you triceps volume a lot with that as well. It is no wonder your OH Triceps Extension was not able to go up. Personally I would focus on overhead pressing instead of the extensions. You can go heavier and give the front delts a little more love.
 
You increased your bench volume quite a bit this session so it goes to say that you increased you triceps volume a lot with that as well. It is no wonder your OH Triceps Extension was not able to go up. Personally I would focus on overhead pressing instead of the extensions. You can go heavier and give the front delts a little more love.
Do you mean to drop the triceps extension in favor of overhead pressing, so I'm ohp twice per week?
If so, DB or standing BB like the other workout?
 
Do you mean to drop the triceps extension in favor of overhead pressing, so I'm ohp twice per week?
If so, DB or standing BB like the other workout?
I guess that depends on how well developed your delts are. If you would like to see them grow then yes. If less worried about them then stick with the extensions. I have just found overhead pressing to really develop the long head of the triceps quite a bit, or even overhead lockouts which take a little of the delts out. To be honest I didn't remember what your other workout looked like either.
 
I guess that depends on how well developed your delts are. If you would like to see them grow then yes. If less worried about them then stick with the extensions. I have just found overhead pressing to really develop the long head of the triceps quite a bit, or even overhead lockouts which take a little of the delts out. To be honest I didn't remember what your other workout looked like either.
Gotcha. Well, the way my workout is designed is everything is hit directly once, and indirectly one more time. So, overhead press one day, other day bench and upright row, so front and Lateral delts are hit twice. The reason for this is my terrible recovery. But, I may have figured something out and if so, I can amend the workout and add a little more direct work. I would love to be OHP and bench twice per week with more volume.
 
You don’t have to be put under for gyno removal. My surgeon did the lipo while under and thought that was good enough. I told him after when I came to that the deal was to take the glands out! I was pissed.

So he honored the agreement and cut on me, but we had already blown the anesthesia money on the first go at the hospital. So he wrote me a script for a full Xanax, put on some chill music & make a little paper towel barrier so you can’t watch, and you just lay back on the table in the office.

Obviously they prep you with iodine & shoot a bunch of lidocaine then local anesthetic first, but I was wide awake for mine, just high. You feel the tugging and cutting some, but very little pain & you’re very mentally relaxed. You just don’t care.
 
You don’t have to be put under for gyno removal. My surgeon did the lipo while under and thought that was good enough. I told him after when I came to that the deal was to take the glands out! I was pissed.

So he honored the agreement and cut on me, but we had already blown the anesthesia money on the first go at the hospital. So he wrote me a script for a full Xanax, put on some chill music & make a little paper towel barrier so you can’t watch, and you just lay back on the table in the office.

Obviously they prep you with iodine & shoot a bunch of lidocaine then local anesthetic first, but I was wide awake for mine, just high. You feel the tugging and cutting some, but very little pain & you’re very mentally relaxed. You just don’t care.
Gotcha. Interesting. That sounds terrible as well 😆
 
Forgot to update weight...218 today. I've had 4 days of appropriate kcal finally. Today I may have went to maintenance, but that's OK. Hopefully tomorrow I can keep it together but we have a Thanksgiving event at our house tomorrow night. That'll be difficult.
 
Thought I figured out this insomnia thing. Guess not.
Fell asleep just fine at 9:30pm with 2mg melatonin, woke up at 10:30pm, then 12am and took 500mg lemon balm and 2mg more melatonin, and then woke up at 2am and have been awake ever since. Another mg of melatonin and 200mg theanine hasn't done anything.
 
Quoted the last workout to track progress.

Today:
BB Bench 3x5x185, set 4 amrap of 6 (possibly 1 rir)
Squat Top Set 3x275
BB Row 10x95, 2x8x115
Cable Upright Row 12x25, 10x30, 10x35
OH Tricep Extension 8x35, 7x35, 5x35
DB Curl 3x8x20's

Bench and squat progressing well. I think next bench workout I'll go for 4x6 of 185, unless anyone has a different recommendation. BB Row was likely RPE7 or 8, no big deal. Definitely picked the wrong weight of overhead cable extension since every set went to failure basically, but I may have not rested long enough either between sets. DB Curls are stuck...
Some more notes on this:
Ever since finishing the overhead triceps extensions, I've had some mild pain in my left triceps. I've been doing this exercise about once per week for about a month but usually not to failure, sometimes 2 sets and sometimes 3; this time all 3 sets were likely 0 rir. My health anxiety ridden brain is scared to death of rhabdo. None of the obvious signs of rhabdo like brown urine or muscle swelling so at this point, I know I'm just being silly. And, aren't there plenty of studies of untrained subjects doing 3 sets to failure in the literature? I just need to rationalize this outside of my own head; Left to myself, I'm capable of convincing myself of incredible things 😆
 
Thought I figured out this insomnia thing. Guess not.
Fell asleep just fine at 9:30pm with 2mg melatonin, woke up at 10:30pm, then 12am and took 500mg lemon balm and 2mg more melatonin, and then woke up at 2am and have been awake ever since. Another mg of melatonin and 200mg theanine hasn't done anything.
Try baby doses of melatonin, they have found high doses like that often create anxiety and wild dreams that are not conducive to rest. If you can get a CBD tincture they are awesome before bed, and also aid with inflammation.
Some more notes on this:
Ever since finishing the overhead triceps extensions, I've had some mild pain in my left triceps. I've been doing this exercise about once per week for about a month but usually not to failure, sometimes 2 sets and sometimes 3; this time all 3 sets were likely 0 rir. My health anxiety ridden brain is scared to death of rhabdo. None of the obvious signs of rhabdo like brown urine or muscle swelling so at this point, I know I'm just being silly. And, aren't there plenty of studies of untrained subjects doing 3 sets to failure in the literature? I just need to rationalize this outside of my own head; Left to myself, I'm capable of convincing myself of incredible things 😆
No worries there you would need total body muscle damage to go into rhabdo. That is when you damage so much muscle at once that the proteins being broken down get into your blood and overwhelm your kidneys to the point they can not function properly. You probably just pushed the connective tissue a bit and it needs to recover.
 
Try baby doses of melatonin, they have found high doses like that often create anxiety and wild dreams that are not conducive to rest. If you can get a CBD tincture they are awesome before bed, and also aid with inflammation.
You might be right about the melatonin. When I have a bad night like last night, I end up taking more, and when it doesn't work, I get intense anxiety, restlessness, restless legs and internal tremors. I didn't know it was the melatonin doing this until now though. 300mcg works well, but I think I need to limit to 1mg when I need more and try something different instead. My anxiety prevents me from trying these other things though 😆
CBD hasn't ever helped my anxiety or sleep though.

No worries there you would need total body muscle damage to go into rhabdo. That is when you damage so much muscle at once that the proteins being broken down get into your blood and overwhelm your kidneys to the point they can not function properly. You probably just pushed the connective tissue a bit and it needs to recover.
Right on. Thanks.
 
You might be right about the melatonin. When I have a bad night like last night, I end up taking more, and when it doesn't work, I get intense anxiety, restlessness, restless legs and internal tremors. I didn't know it was the melatonin doing this until now though. 300mcg works well, but I think I need to limit to 1mg when I need more and try something different instead. My anxiety prevents me from trying these other things though 😆
CBD hasn't ever helped my anxiety or sleep though.


Right on. Thanks.
On the CBD have you ever tried the tinctures? It is one of the most direct and strongest ways to take them. You use them sublingually so most of the cbd isn't destroyed in the gut. Also you could try RELAX by APEX ALCHEMY which is transdermal and keeps the CBD from being destroyed in the gut. Definitely helps me with sleeping and shoulder discomfort. I bet they are running a Bogo or something for Veteran's Day. @Marne40 are you all running a special for Veteran's day?
 
On the CBD have you ever tried the tinctures? It is one of the most direct and strongest ways to take them. You use them sublingually so most of the cbd isn't destroyed in the gut. Also you could try RELAX by APEX ALCHEMY which is transdermal and keeps the CBD from being destroyed in the gut. Definitely helps me with sleeping and shoulder discomfort. I bet they are running a Bogo or something for Veteran's Day. @Marne40 are you all running a special for Veteran's day?
I've taken up to 100mg sublingual cbd at a time with little effect. I'm pretty sure this is because my comt mutations causing a buildup of dopamine and norepinephrine. That transdermal cbd sounds interesting though.
 
Don’t take this the wrong way, but you aren’t training remotely hard enough for rhabdo to be a consideration. You would need about 10x the volume pushing to failure before we could even consider that. It’s more common in things line CrossFit where the volume gets crazy.

You can absolutely take a single high intensity set to the brink of utter destruction, and rhabdo isn’t going to happen. I mean I have had widowmaker rest-pause Legpress sets working with a spotter where I swear I saw God, and I didn’t get close to rhabdo - I just had knee pain from connective tissue damage for 2-3 weeks. I frequently aggravate connective tissue in my elbows on tricep work; my right one has been buggy off and on for months from a past block of heavy lying EZBar extensions.
 
Don’t take this the wrong way, but you aren’t training remotely hard enough for rhabdo to be a consideration. You would need about 10x the volume pushing to failure before we could even consider that. It’s more common in things line CrossFit where the volume gets crazy.

You can absolutely take a single high intensity set to the brink of utter destruction, and rhabdo isn’t going to happen. I mean I have had widowmaker rest-pause Legpress sets working with a spotter where I swear I saw God, and I didn’t get close to rhabdo - I just had knee pain from connective tissue damage for 2-3 weeks. I frequently aggravate connective tissue in my elbows on tricep work; my right one has been buggy off and on for months from a past block of heavy lying EZBar extensions.
Thats what my rational brain says too 😆
But I've read some journal articles about athletes or very fit individuals taking time off, then resuming and bam, rhabdo. Granted, I've been back at it for a few months already so again, that shouldn't apply to me. Nevertheless, thanks for the reassurance. Part of this log is to document my insanity and the recovery of such 🤪
 
Thats what my rational brain says too
But I've read some journal articles about athletes or very fit individuals taking time off, then resuming and bam, rhabdo. Granted, I've been back at it for a few months already so again, that shouldn't apply to me. Nevertheless, thanks for the reassurance. Part of this log is to document my insanity and the recovery of such 🤪

You would know; like you said you understand what to watch for. You are very observant with your body so something like that won’t ever sneak up on you! You’re all good
 
Well, been laying here an hour and no hope of sleep tonight. 300mcg melatonin and 500mg lemon balm hasn't cut it and feel over the top restless inside, like a motor running. At least my diet was tight all day.
 
Weight: 218

After this weekend, I expected to have gained a little more so I'm glad about that. Not a terrible diet this weekend, but more food then I planned.

Slept very well last night actually and didn't take anything before hand, in the middle of the night took 500mg lemon balm. On a whim of desperation, I unplugged our wireless internet. Absolutely could be and most likely is just coincidence but I'll be doing that again tonight just in case. I never bought in to the whole EMF thing, but I'm desperate for sleep, health and wellness.

Today's workout:

Deadlift top set 2x365
Standing OHP 8x115, 6x125, 5x135
Assisted Pullups 3x5xBW-50
Incline Smith Press 2x5x90
Smith Shrugs 3x5x140

Notes: I've been only going down to about chin level on standing OHP, because I thought the bottom portion was too much triceps only, but went back to full ROM after watching a video by Jeff Nippard. Being that I increased the ROM, added a rep to the last set, mostly glycogen depleted, and hit it without any preWO carbs, I call it a win. Next, I'll most likely be working in incline presses for the upper chest and extra shoulder development. I want to do dips also, but considering my recovery, I just gotta do what I can. My upper chest needs far more work than what chest dips will provide.
 
Weight: 218 once again.

After dinner, ate some pumpkin roll and pumpkin pie. Lunch was turkey and mashed potatoes, so that could easily account for the lack of weight drop.

Turned off all sources of emf last night before sleep, and didn't make a difference. Woke up every hour. Took 500mg lemon balm at midnight then 1mg melatonin at 2 or 3am to really ensure I got some sleep. I really gotta figure this out. I'll be having an organic acid test by Great Plains in the next couple weeks. Hopefully that sheds some light.
 
Weight: 218.4

Birthday week, so kcal are a bit high these past few days. I haven't gorged yet, but tomorrow night the family and I are headed to a Brazilian steakhouse, so I won't beholding back there.

Slept fairly well last night. My egg theory on sleep is gone. Looking forward to the OAT test.
 
Weight: 217.8

Yes! Even ate a little cheesecake and a couple smores out back last night and still a little lighter. Sleep was not great though. Up at 4am without reason again, and also waking up about an hour after going to sleep...so...

I'm looking for any recommendation on blue light blocking glasses if anyone wears them. There's so many on Amazon with both good and bad reviews...can't tell which are fake. Thanks.
 
Today's Workout:

BB Bench 4x6x185
BB Row 10x95, 2x8x115
Squat 5x185
Cable Upright Row 12x30, 10x35, 8x42.5
DB Curl 2x10x20's, 8x20's
Overhead Cable Extension 12x25, 10x30, 8x35

Notes:
Barbell bench up a little from last time once again, even somewhat low on carbs, but I did have any 50g CHO before the workout. Only the last set was truly 0rir. Barbell Row was a bit light and squat was very light because I want to see how I sleep with only one hard compound exercise (or 2, if Cable Upright Row counts), followed by isolation work. I wonder if my body just can't handle that much heavy compound work in one session. Another workout, I may only do upper push and see how I sleep. Otherwise, progress on Upright Row, Curls and Tricep Extension.

Tonight is Brazilian steakhouse! W00t!
 
Not sure if it was the workout, or what I ate at the Brazilian steakhouse, but I only slept from 10pm to 12am. Friday was pretty rough obviously.

Weight: 218

Headed out of town to visit wife's family for the next week; doubt I'll get any workouts in but I'll try to still get a few 20 minutes walks in per day.
 
Brazilian steak house for the win! That Fogo de Chao (spelling?) chain loses big money when I go in. They are bringing the bill and I send them away for more meats. Don’t insult me, I will be fed at your expense! 🤣
 
Brazilian steak house for the win! That Fogo de Chao (spelling?) chain loses big money when I go in. They are bringing the bill and I send them away for more meats. Don’t insult me, I will be fed at your expense! 🤣
Do you ever get the meat sweats from that? I woke up at midnight sweating and heart pounding like I haven't had in a while.
 
So 42mg a week sounds pretty darn low IMHO, I would think a minimum of 10mg a day if you want decent results.
For 99.99999999% of ppl it's too low, but he's got some weird crazy response to low dose testosterone, but if I remember correctly his 6mg daily was the same as 100mg 1x week or something like that.
 
It's not actually pleasant

I just hadn’t heard of that! I may have too good of digestion and metabolism. Or maybe I haven’t eaten enough. I’ve never been to one of those buffets you guys talked about. But I’ve eaten like 16oz steaks and no issue.
 
For 99.99999999% of ppl it's too low, but he's got some weird crazy response to low dose testosterone, but if I remember correctly his 6mg daily was the same as 100mg 1x week or something like that.
Yeah, exactly. I have labs coming up in a few weeks to confirm.
I just hadn’t heard of that! I may have too good of digestion and metabolism. Or maybe I haven’t eaten enough. I’ve never been to one of those buffets you guys talked about. But I’ve eaten like 16oz steaks and no issue.
Same here. 1lb of meat won't do it. And it doesn't happen every time I go. But this last time was a doozy.
 
Since this is becoming a lot of my health and symptom tracking. I've had a couple revelations.

AM Blood Pressure: 117/72
This was after 100mg theanine, before eating. I've been off telmisartan for almost 2 weeks, so I call this a win.

Otherwise:

According to my Chris Masterjohn choline calculator, I should be getting the equivalent amount of choline in 6 egg yolks daily. Currently I'm only getting 4 to 5. That could explain why when I stopped eating eggs this few days, I eventually stopped sleeping.

Another thing I've noticed...scrambled eggs vs. hardboiled. If I eat scrambled, I don't get much overstimulation, no anxiety aggravation, but I get a little constipated. Hardboiled results in overstimulation, anxiety, better mood, and better 'regularity'..

Another observation, if I drop my folinic acid dose to under 300mcg, I don't feel as stimulated. But, if I take melatonin with my folinic too low, I get an overwhelming depression from 2pm to 7pm the next day.
 
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I just hadn’t heard of that! I may have too good of digestion and metabolism. Or maybe I haven’t eaten enough. I’ve never been to one of those buffets you guys talked about. But I’ve eaten like 16oz steaks and no issue.

Yeah, exactly. I have labs coming up in a few weeks to confirm.

Same here. 1lb of meat won't do it. And it doesn't happen every time I go. But this last time was a doozy.

I pass on everything except meat when I go. Literally zero bread, salad, dessert; just meat on meat. That’s really the only time I get the meat sweats
 
Don't take this the wrong way but have you seen a psychiatrist? My wife had to see a psychiatrist to get help with her anxiety and sleeping issues. She had a chemical imbalance and needed it corrected in order to sleep.
 
I just hadn’t heard of that! I may have too good of digestion and metabolism. Or maybe I haven’t eaten enough. I’ve never been to one of those buffets you guys talked about. But I’ve eaten like 16oz steaks and no issue.

Lol c’mon man 16oz is a solid steak, but if you want big boy metabolic disruption you need to put down some big boy numbers for the sweats!

I probably need at least 50% more than that to get into sweats territory, but rest assured if you push far enough you’ll earn them.

Not fun at all though
 
Lol c’mon man 16oz is a solid steak, but if you want big boy metabolic disruption you need to put down some big boy numbers for the sweats!

I probably need at least 50% more than that to get into sweats territory, but rest assured if you push far enough you’ll earn them.

Not fun at all though
Right, I also like to get my meat sweat inducing meals in earlier as opposed to a late evening feeding. That way there is a chance that I might still get to sleep decently.
 
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