lamonster14
Member
Extremely true, my gym has been infested
i swear to ****ing god I was trying to deadlift and this mother****er kept walking behind me and talking with his buddy. 5 minutes went by and this guy didnt move. I turned my music off, stood up, turned around, and said to these two ****ers "Hey guys if you dont mind im trying to move weight, so stop moving your lips and take your conversation elsewhere." I got a disgusted look since im only 19, they mustve thought im some type of douchebaglol. But seriously I've been getting really heated at this sh1t around the gym lately. ****.
If you have enough energy to carry on a conversation in between sets then your not lifting hard enough. That's my motto. Hell half the time between dead lifting or squatting sets I can barely stand.
Last night Habibi and his middle eastern pals ( 5 of them ) were playing a game I like to call " how many hadjis does it take to lift a weight?!" Seriously , every gym I go to in south eastern michigan has these packs of early 20 year old Arabs that seem to think its a team sport. They never really lift , they talk hadji gossip to eachother (I assume that's what they're doin) , look at their "muscles" in the mirror as if its automatically grown after some half assed cable curls and waste space all along wearing the closest thing to gym attire in their wardrobe which usually means a Nike shirt and jeans with some ugly ass high tops. When you actually need to use the equipment they're wasting time on they look condo fused when you ask to use it and move on like a school of fish to get in someone else's way.
I apologize to anyone of middle eastern decent. If your reading this your here and you're most likely not like that but its true.
Don't you love that? I had two groups have conversations in the middle of the area I was using, first on deadlifts behind me, then on the pull up bar when I was doing core, which I had been doing for the past 5 minutes. I'm sure they noticed. ah well. I have a rule for my friends at the gym. Lift more, talk less.
So another one puttin myself on blast tonight. If/when I decide to be a douche I like to pretend I'm in a movie and do it for the timing and humor regardless how anyone else sees it. Most the time I'm the only laughing and look like a dick , but hey at least I got a laugh and you can always apologize for words. Later on it'll make a funny story once the buttthurt wears off... So anyway I come home tonight after working out and a nice little 12 mile ride on my bike and I'm all wound up. I walk in and my wife's getting out of the shower so being that I have a penis I decide to make a move. She tells me "no I'm still on my period". I reply without a thought "is your mouth on its period?". I thought it was funny as hell and luckily got away without ducking a busted lip. Luckily she adores me and knows I love her like crazy and have a sick sense of humor. Tonight I was a post gym douche ......
P.s. feel free to use that line if you dare ;-)
I had a guy ask me to spot him on military press. I said sure. He says he is going for 6 reps. He gets to the 3rd rep and it starts going back down. So I help assist a little. Of course he has to go for rep number 4. This time I have to help lift it. Guess what, yup he has to go for rep number 5. I am basically up right rowing it at this point. I pull the weight back to the rack. The bar misses the rack. I sh1t you not he was going for rep number 6. Trying to get reps at any cost.
I cant stand when my friends talk to me at the gym lol. I just lose focus and it blows. I was doing DB Bench the other day, really into it, about to attempt 85lbs DBs after previously doing 70s. I'm in the zone pretty much and then my friend taps me on the shoulder.... concentration broken. STill got them up but took a little bit to regain my focus. I'd rather just keep my headphones in and keep chugging along my workout.
Haha I could see that. Definitely don't like when people "help" me for no reason. But damn he had no business trying that weight. At least warn me "hey I am weak so expect to pull this weight off my lifeless body." With that said if he ever asks for a spot again I will decline.
CountryLiftin said:Sucks to suck. Hahaha. I have guys do this to me and try to impress then fail... Same deal. It's sad.
So another one puttin myself on blast tonight. If/when I decide to be a douche I like to pretend I'm in a movie and do it for the timing and humor regardless how anyone else sees it. Most the time I'm the only laughing and look like a dick , but hey at least I got a laugh and you can always apologize for words. Later on it'll make a funny story once the buttthurt wears off... So anyway I come home tonight after working out and a nice little 12 mile ride on my bike and I'm all wound up. I walk in and my wife's getting out of the shower so being that I have a penis I decide to make a move. She tells me "no I'm still on my period". I reply without a thought "is your mouth on its period?". I thought it was funny as hell and luckily got away without ducking a busted lip. Luckily she adores me and knows I love her like crazy and have a sick sense of humor. Tonight I was a post gym douche ......
P.s. feel free to use that line if you dare ;-)
Periods are the motherf*cking devil. When my wife's friend comes to town, she is like a completely different person. Sometimes I call bullsh*t and tell her she doesn't need to act like that even though she is on her special time. It's like, "Hey, where is my wife and what the hell did you do with her?"
So another one puttin myself on blast tonight. If/when I decide to be a douche I like to pretend I'm in a movie and do it for the timing and humor regardless how anyone else sees it. Most the time I'm the only laughing and look like a dick , but hey at least I got a laugh and you can always apologize for words. Later on it'll make a funny story once the buttthurt wears off... So anyway I come home tonight after working out and a nice little 12 mile ride on my bike and I'm all wound up. I walk in and my wife's getting out of the shower so being that I have a penis I decide to make a move. She tells me "no I'm still on my period". I reply without a thought "is your mouth on its period?". I thought it was funny as hell and luckily got away without ducking a busted lip. Luckily she adores me and knows I love her like crazy and have a sick sense of humor. Tonight I was a post gym douche ......
P.s. feel free to use that line if you dare ;-)
Periods are the motherf*cking devil. When my wife's friend comes to town, she is like a completely different person. Sometimes I call bullsh*t and tell her she doesn't need to act like that even though she is on her special time. It's like, "Hey, where is my wife and what the hell did you do with her?"
I have these two older ladies that are at the gym every morning when I'm there. Prolly about 50 years old. I was there for forty five minutes this morning, and they only did leg press and leg extension with what I'll assume is hardly any weight. They would switch spots occasionally but only those two machines. The thing that is nuts to me is today was the third time this week they were doing the exact same thing. I just dont get it :thinking:
Walked into the gym today to a guy popping a zit in the ****ing dumbbell rack mirror. I looked right at him and was like "really dude, this isn't your ****ing bathroom" he put his head down and walked right out of the gym. Probably one of the grossest things I've ever seen someone do at the gym.
That was me.... I'm sorry ... It's just that it was making my butt itch so bad and it was right in the crack so I had to get at it ASAP :-/
Oh come on man it was his face, his face!!! Bad mental pictures. Lol
divorce. Problem solved :toofunny:
My go to rag joke is..."i don't trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die"
Lol i said that to my wife and her chin was glued to floor! One of the better comments to make by far!
I will say no thank you to child support. haha
Yeah the wife was unhappy when I taught my 8 year old that. He acts surprisingly older than his age and started laughing.
Dirty Dan said:So for the past week I have seen this Spanish guy with a typical 80s Jerry curl and a pencil point mustache on the treadmill with a different fat chick next to him each day. At the end of their hour long walk he kisses each one goodbye....I want to call him a douche but I'm not going to deny being impressed by him lol.
Ladies love the jerry curls and pointy mustaches haha.
I hate the 6'1 160lb kid trying to school me on nutrition. College kids. Blah.
I dont expect to agree with everything people say but damn. You couldnt beat information into him. Honestly thought he was going to say he did crossfit. That is the kind of zealous attitude they LOVE.
I hate the 6'1 160lb kid trying to school me on nutrition. College kids. Blah.
Yeah damn those college kids... I deal with them everyday :rofl:
Rofl sorry! Not referring to you lol.
Of course walking into a gym it's a known fact you'll have to wait for the bench presses. Atleast at college recs anyways.. had a kid do around 12 sets, 5 reps each, with 95lbs. I don't mind waiting but it took him 25 minutes(took leisurely breaks in between).. I just wanna know what kinda program this prick thought of.
Today's d bag... I was doing incline hammer curls and super setting them with dips. I finish my set and jump into my dips. I was gone for less than a minute to finda d bag DUMBELL BENCH PRESSING the 30 lbs dumbbells I was using to curl. He said, " oh my fault bro they've been sitting there for 10 minutes "... With my bag and all my **** there while I was gone for 45 seconds. F that guy. Who benches with 30lbs dumbbells..... He was a grown ass man too at least 30. Christ. Leave my **** alone.
Don't you know you need 5 mins of rest between those heavy max effort sets?! LOL
Dude you can curl tirdys! holy schnikes I bench those - gym bitch
:laughing: