bader85
New member
52
So a man gets done with work and heads to the bar, he orders a beer and finishes it up. The bartender asks if he wants another. "no, no. I can't. My wife would kill me if she knew I was out drinking, I promised I wouldn't"
Bartender fills up his glass and says "no worries, here's one on the house"
The man after his second beer can't stop himself and stays at the bar for a couple hours when he vomits on himself. "Damn! How am i going to keep this from my wife knowing? I smell awful and have throw up on my shirt!"
The bartender says "Hey, no worries! All you got to do, is put a twenty dollar in your shirt pocket, and when your wife asks, pull it out and tell her that some guy was really drunk and threw up on you so he gave you this twenty to get it cleaned."
"Hey, that's a really good idea! I guess I'll drink a little more then." So the man has a few more drinks and heads home.
His wife is standing at the door furious, "Look at you! You have vomit all over yourself, you smell like beer and look awful!"
"No, no.. hunny" the man slurs out "I was at the bar, but I only had a two drinks when this guy throws up all over me... here look! He gave me this twenty bucks to get it cleaned" And he pulls out the money and hands it to his wife.
"You are such a liar, there's fifty dollars here, it's your own money!" She yells back.
"Oh.. well honey... he **** in my pants too."
So a man gets done with work and heads to the bar, he orders a beer and finishes it up. The bartender asks if he wants another. "no, no. I can't. My wife would kill me if she knew I was out drinking, I promised I wouldn't"
Bartender fills up his glass and says "no worries, here's one on the house"
The man after his second beer can't stop himself and stays at the bar for a couple hours when he vomits on himself. "Damn! How am i going to keep this from my wife knowing? I smell awful and have throw up on my shirt!"
The bartender says "Hey, no worries! All you got to do, is put a twenty dollar in your shirt pocket, and when your wife asks, pull it out and tell her that some guy was really drunk and threw up on you so he gave you this twenty to get it cleaned."
"Hey, that's a really good idea! I guess I'll drink a little more then." So the man has a few more drinks and heads home.
His wife is standing at the door furious, "Look at you! You have vomit all over yourself, you smell like beer and look awful!"
"No, no.. hunny" the man slurs out "I was at the bar, but I only had a two drinks when this guy throws up all over me... here look! He gave me this twenty bucks to get it cleaned" And he pulls out the money and hands it to his wife.
"You are such a liar, there's fifty dollars here, it's your own money!" She yells back.
"Oh.. well honey... he **** in my pants too."
