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anxiety came back

boricuarage

boricuarage

Banned
fellas I was diagnosed with PTSD and anxiety disorder almost 3 years ago... I been out of the military for 6 years now and not once went to the gym after that. I only managed to gain some belly fat during that time, but nothing serious and I ate like crap. well to make a long story short I was put on meds last year and responded great that I became my normal self and went back to the gym. no fast food and eating right. started to feel good and body looking good again. been off my meds for about 2 months and was still doing good, up until 2 weeks ago I felt something was wrong with my inner self... having a new born, I haven't had the time to go to the gym as much, haven't been eating right, loss of appetite and no good sleep.. now I have force myself to get back on my meds. I just hope that I can get back to my normal self again and make this anxiety go away...and be able to go the gym again.
 
Best of luck to you, bro. Hope everything works out.

Hope this is not offensive to you, you should check out some of the spiritual treads here, it just might help.
 
This isnt advice, Im not a Doc. but, the anxiety may always be there, the key is in learning to control it, whatever it takes to control it, you will learn to deal with it. Accept the fact that it will always be there, not just you, everyone experiences it. I would go back on meds only if they were something I didnt have to take unless I was having an attack, and as you know those can be daily on a regular basis. Eventually it goes away and stops happening so frequently. Androgens can prompt attacks.
 
I feel for ya'. I have been dealing with anxiety all my life. It's not fun---I have my up days and down days. At one point i thought that i was bi-polar,i went to several doctors and they concluded that it was not bi-polarism.

All i can say is either i am on or i am off---as simple as that. I think that years of ingesting toxins and chemicals have not helped,and slowly i am trying to pin-point the root cause of all this. I mean i have days where i feel as if the whole world is conspiring against me,and i really don't even want to socialize or be around anyone.

I know a lot of my co-worker's probably talk about me,and my sometimes bizarre behavior,but....they haven't walked a mile in my shoes.

Keep your head up and hang in there....it will get better.
 
I was doing a Rhodiola,Bacopa combo a while ago. I dunno if it helped or not---to be honest i felt like i was stoned.
 
Knowbull said:
This isnt advice, Im not a Doc. but, the anxiety may always be there, the key is in learning to control it, whatever it takes to control it, you will learn to deal with it. Accept the fact that it will always be there, not just you, everyone experiences it. I would go back on meds only if they were something I didnt have to take unless I was having an attack, and as you know those can be daily on a regular basis. Eventually it goes away and stops happening so frequently. Androgens can prompt attacks.
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yeh I know the anxiety may always be there and been coping with it...
actually I never had problems with androgens, no attacks whatsoever, but I was also on meds as well. my anxiety is kind of different, I don't have panic attack like shortness of breath or heart raising.. it's very very psycological...kind of like your brain is racing..., but I will get back in my feet....
thanks guys..
 
Well i have general or social anxiety so the doc says. Had the meds and all that stuff didnt notice any difference, and ive had it for quite awhile now. If im in control or know the people in the situation im in. Im fine! If its an unfamiliar situation or im not in control ill start to get that feeling where i just have to get out....

The best thing that i (think) may have been starting to help me, is the whole just do it who gives a s**t mentality. Im a strong believer in the power of the mind. alot more then having to take meds. Which i havent taken for a long time now!

So of recent ive been in a few situations where i did not want to be and had that panic feeling where i had to get out!!! and really had to FORCE myself to be there and stay doing what i was doing. When i get that anxiety feeling i feel really sick, then i think i make myself more anxious about being in sick in a public place. SO to combat that feeling i slowly ate a banana and sipped some water to bring the blood back to my stomach even though i felt sick and didnt want it i made myself have it and felt that bit better.

Once the occasion that i was at was finished and i was home, you wonder what all the fuss was about, and it feels good to prove to yourself that you can overcome these things mentally and feel like you used to when you were younger.

I used to be the biggest adrenalin junkie and thought i was invincible. Now with anxiety im a different person as in wanting to do things that i used to do that i now know im going to get that feeling and will try to avoid it!

Now the problem with the drugs is they tend only to address the symptoms, not the root cause(s) of anxiety and panic attacks. At its worst, anxiety can be debilitating, causing you to avoid doing things we find threatening or worrying. Such people are avoiding facing their anxieties, limiting the joy you get from life. Too often, however, when you seek therapy to help you deal with the situation, you will be told to overcome their anxiety rather than confront it. That, imo is just another form of avoidance – the very issue that sent you to therapy in the first place. It is important to remember that some of life's best moments also come with great anxiety.

So sorry about the massive rant just feel it cant be summed up in a few words. Plus i thought i would share my experiences with it as its always good to know other people are going through the same STUPID :D ANNOYING FEELINGS LOL!!! i get very frustrated with it all. So imo try leave the meds alone as i mentioned before its not a FIX just another way of avoidance! if your having trouble going into the gym JUST GO! force yourself when your at your worst.

I am still currently as im typing this have my anxiety and a few big events coming up that i have to do where im am going to be s**tting myself and would avoid normally. But with this new take on anxiety ive opted to do this thing and hopefully i will come out mentally stronger once ive done it! I mean whats the worst thats gonna happen shortness breath, bit of a panic, a little quezy! Sounds likes the big nights out in town i used to have back in the day :D and that was fun...... lmao

OK off to dip fingers in tigerbalm and wrap them in bandages after typing this

Not sure if i even helped after that rant. You probably already new all those things! :D
But i Hope your feelings subside and you can get on with and enjoy life :) Take it easy m8!
 
Newtonselite said:
Well i have general or social anxiety so the doc says. Had the meds and all that stuff didnt notice any difference, and ive had it for quite awhile now. If im in control or know the people in the situation im in. Im fine! If its an unfamiliar situation or im not in control ill start to get that feeling where i just have to get out....

The best thing that i (think) may have been starting to help me, is the whole just do it who gives a s**t mentality. Im a strong believer in the power of the mind. alot more then having to take meds. Which i havent taken for a long time now!

So of recent ive been in a few situations where i did not want to be and had that panic feeling where i had to get out!!! and really had to FORCE myself to be there and stay doing what i was doing. When i get that anxiety feeling i feel really sick, then i think i make myself more anxious about being in sick in a public place. SO to combat that feeling i slowly ate a banana and sipped some water to bring the blood back to my stomach even though i felt sick and didnt want it i made myself have it and felt that bit better.

Once the occasion that i was at was finished and i was home, you wonder what all the fuss was about, and it feels good to prove to yourself that you can overcome these things mentally and feel like you used to when you were younger.

I used to be the biggest adrenalin junkie and thought i was invincible. Now with anxiety im a different person as in wanting to do things that i used to do that i now know im going to get that feeling and will try to avoid it!

Now the problem with the drugs is they tend only to address the symptoms, not the root cause(s) of anxiety and panic attacks. At its worst, anxiety can be debilitating, causing you to avoid doing things we find threatening or worrying. Such people are avoiding facing their anxieties, limiting the joy you get from life. Too often, however, when you seek therapy to help you deal with the situation, you will be told to overcome their anxiety rather than confront it. That, imo is just another form of avoidance
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Dude, Boricua, that sucks, and I'm truly sorry! I deal with something very similar after several incidents during my first deployment (I was a crew-chief in the Air Force). I was an early responder to an aircraft explosion (no one died or anything) in one of the incidents, for example. All these things really took a toll on me, I can't really explain why though, because by themselves, they really weren't that big of a deal. But, I started having panic attacks in public, and I still do years later. I will tell you the ONLY drugs that have SIGNIFICANTLY helped me were narcotics (which COMPLETELY got rid of my anxiety), which led to my 160mg per day Oxycontin habit (which I just broke off a few months ago). For me, it's either a horrible heroin habit, or horrible social anxiety (I get the EXTREME fight-or-flight response if someone so much as stands next to me at Wal-Mart). I really hope you have better luck than me, but it seems this problem is really difficult to treat. I will tell you they put me on Prozac when it began, and I almost killed myself. After being treated for that, they switched me to Celexa, which still didn't do much of anything (although I was no longer trying to kill myself, so that's a net gain I guess)! I did notice though that at the height of my anxiety, I did a blood test and my Estradiol was high. IDK, maybe something to investigate... Anywho, just wanted to share my story with ya, and let you know you're not alone! Whatever branch you were in, we're all brothers, and unfortunately, a LOT of us are going through these types of problems. I'm here for ya Boricua buddy! Good luck!
--Brian
 
PTSD is not clearly understood. There are some therapy applications and theories that have shown to be very beneficial. Medication for this situation is helpful, however, the therapy and consistency of therapy combined with medication are going to give you the best option for assuaging PTSD symptoms. Some of these therapies that are showing benefits are related to Exposure therapies, such as Flooding, In Vivo Exposure, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). The last showing the most benefits. I am just posting this to give you some ideas and information about how PTSD is being treated. My suggestion would be to find a therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, who is versed in these areas and see what they can do for you.
 
ryansm said:
PTSD is not clearly understood. There are some therapy applications and theories that have shown to be very beneficial. Medication for this situation is helpful, however, the therapy and consistency of therapy combined with medication are going to give you the best option for assuaging PTSD symptoms. Some of these therapies that are showing benefits are related to Exposure therapies, such as Flooding, In Vivo Exposure, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). The last showing the most benefits. I am just posting this to give you some ideas and information about how PTSD is being treated. My suggestion would be to find a therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, who is versed in these areas and see what they can do for you.
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Thanks a lot Ryansm, there's some things to look into. I know nothing about Exposure therapies, but I will shortly! Thanks again!
 
purple heart recipient from rocket mortar attack...sharpnel to the body, I think that's where it all began.
without the meds I don't even wana get out of bed. luckily I work security in a retail store so I'm in a nice cozy office with no one bugging me much.
glad we sharing some experience guys.
 
That would certainly do it for me! I'm sure we'll get better with time, though you may take longer than me! Keep us informed!
--Brian
 
boricuarage said:
oxycotin? never heard that med before
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Highly addictive, stay away from it if at all possible.

I did a search and rescue mission on a mountain side in Europe back in the mid 80's. (plane crash) Lock it away in an impenetrable vault in the farthest, darkest place of your brain that you can find and forget about it, it'll get better.
 
bluehealer said:
Highly addictive, stay away from it if at all possible.

I did a search and rescue mission on a mountain side in Europe back in the mid 80's. (plane crash) Lock it away in an impenetrable vault in the farthest, darkest place of your brain that you can find and forget about it, it'll get better.
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I'm assuming you been on this before. wasn't intending on trying it. I was addicted to Valium.. well my body was.. and the withdrawals were horrendous...
 
boricuarage said:
I'm assuming you been on this before. wasn't intending on trying it. I was addicted to Valium.. well my body was.. and the withdrawals were horrendous...
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No... I don't do drugs, legal or illegal. I did however have a long time alcohol addiction. I just know alot of people that are or have been addicted. Loritab, xanex, oxy, valium... even adderal is being abused. Iknow this one kid that had a ruptured appendix and didn't even know until his body became toxic and almost died, he was on oxy.
 
Ya, I did the valium thing. Great drug, but end up horrendously addicted within weeks (and those withdrawals can kill you). Oxycontin is twice as strong as morphine! It got so bad that when they finally got around to giving me my hip surgeries (2 years after symptoms started; military health care system, I'm sure you understand), they had to give me fentanyl because they couldn't give me enough oxycontin! Either way, oxycontin is being investigated by psychologists as a cure for for depression, as it cures almost 100% of anxiety and depression cases. Unfortunately, it has side effects, but I found it to be nowhere near as addictive as nicotine, caffeine, or valium. Just my experience. If you can do without it though, I definitely would (I have 3 bottles of it in different forms, but I haven't taken any in months).
 
diablosho said:
Ya, I did the valium thing. Great drug, but end up horrendously addicted within weeks (and those withdrawals can kill you). Oxycontin is twice as strong as morphine! It got so bad that when they finally got around to giving me my hip surgeries (2 years after symptoms started; military health care system, I'm sure you understand), they had to give me fentanyl because they couldn't give me enough oxycontin! Either way, oxycontin is being investigated by psychologists as a cure for for depression, as it cures almost 100% of anxiety and depression cases. Unfortunately, it has side effects, but I found it to be nowhere near as addictive as nicotine, caffeine, or valium. Just my experience. If you can do without it though, I definitely would (I have 3 bottles of it in different forms, but I haven't taken any in months).
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seems like you been through alot like me. man it's crazy how anxiety can take over your life. all those things we use to loved to do can't. I can't even get on a rollercoaster no more.
**** I wish I was reborn sometimes!
 
HA! I accidentally posted this in another message, but I meant to post it here! Anywho, I read a year or two ago in some scientific studies that the alpha-2 adrenergic receptor is largely responsible for anxiety symptoms, so I started using Alpha-Yohimbine (Alpha-2 AR Antagonist), mainly to replace the aspirin in my ECA stack. I found it got rid of the jitters from the ECA stack, and did a lot for my anxiety as well! Something for you to look into (must be Alpha-Yohimbine or Rauwolscine, not basic Yohimbe or Yohimbine-they are not selective to the a2 AR receptor, but Rauwolscine is). Just a suggestion, maybe check out some studies!
--Brian
 
boricuarage said:
Brian,
what are your symptoms?
this seems like an interesting route.
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Well, I always have it where, when I'm at Wal-Mart for example, if someone so much as walks past me in an aisle, I'm constantly watching what they're doing/where they're going. Heart rate racing, Insanely high aggression, Muscle Tension (Every muscle in my back flexes so hard, by the time I get home, I'm sore!) I always FEEL like people are "plotting" on me at the mall, even though I KNOW they're not! It really sucks to always be on guard all the time when I'm in public! I think the best way to describe it would be like the worst case of road rage you've ever had (where you get tunnel vision/aggression/homicidal rage/etc.), but for the whole time you're out in public. Really scary ****! And the thing that sucks is, the Oxycontin COMPLETELY got rid of ALL of that ****! I would actually strike up conversations with strangers, so if anything, it was too liberating! But the Alpha-Yohimbine worked for me in combination with the Ephedrine in the ECA stack, hopefully it's effects aren't different on an individual basis.
 
Wow, very enlightening thread. So happy I clicked on it.

First of all, god bless you soldiers. Your sacrifice is appreciated and some one like me will never understand the true manhood experience of war and battle. You soldiers are of a greeater breed than I. You are better men.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking medication to help you with your anxiety. However, I totally feel you on it being another form of avoidance and just a short term fix because ya...once you go off the meds your initial problems come back. Sucks. I'm in the same boat.

One thing I've done is meditation. I got this meditation self hypnosis app on my droid phone and it's friggin awesome. It's helped me a lot in my life. I encourage you to try some form of yoga or meditation. Good luck and God bless.
 
VeganMike said:
Wow, very enlightening thread. So happy I clicked on it.

First of all, god bless you soldiers. Your sacrifice is appreciated and some one like me will never understand the true manhood experience of war and battle. You soldiers are of a greeater breed than I. You are better men.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking medication to help you with your anxiety. However, I totally feel you on it being another form of avoidance and just a short term fix because ya...once you go off the meds your initial problems come back. Sucks. I'm in the same boat.

One thing I've done is meditation. I got this meditation self hypnosis app on my droid phone and it's friggin awesome. It's helped me a lot in my life. I encourage you to try some form of yoga or meditation. Good luck and God bless.
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what name of the app?
 
boricuarage said:
what name of the app?
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"Hypnosis Meditation" ....it was the one with the highest rating when I searched meditation in market place.

Another really good one for meditation is the iZen app. OMG, AMAZING! I literally get a high off of it. It uses these crazy brain frequencies and all these different sound effects like monks chanting, water pouring, jingles and bells, so intense.
 
That's really cool! I would NEVER have guessed that would even be possible! Too bad I still have a LG Chocolate 2 (don't even have texting/internet). I just decided not to go outside into public places (except the gym, but I think that's kind of an EXTENSION of my home, so no anxiety there thank God). And Vegan, thanks for the kind words, but please don't knock yourself down man, it makes me feel bad! You'd be amazed at what you can do when you're in the position to have to do so, and anybody can be a hero when they have to be.
 
Haha, don't feel bad Diablo. I feel you on that man, thx for the kind words, I really think I can be a hero in other ways, all of us can pitch in and try to make Earth better for all of us. Or even just being a hero to my family would be good enough for me.

Good news, Diablo, you don't need a droid. I just googled meditation hypnosis and I found this on youtube...it's exactly like the app I have...

[nomedia="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ESxma87Vjk"]YouTube - Mirror of the Mind - manifestation technique[/nomedia]
 
boricuarage said:
damn Brian you can't even leave the house? that's ****ty!!!
are you working or you getting disability from VA?
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Well, I can leave the house, but I always feel like I'm in imminent danger when I do, so I prefer not to (working on it though). I'm not on disability, as no one told me about that until the week before my separation date, so I'm working on that too. I'm also unemployed (I saved all my deployment money thank God, so I'm living on that with the GI Bill until I'm done with school-sitting in a room filled w/ strangers is terrifying for me, but I'm getting through it). Sometimes when I absolutely have to make a good appearance (appointments, etc.), I take a painkiller, and I'm myself again within an hour. I have noticed my symptoms getting better, though, as time has gone by. Not AS anxious as I used to be! It used to be so bad, I would get "tunnel hearing" (very strange, I know) and tunnel vision at the grocery store. But, as I continued to expose myself to those conditions, I have been getting better. Now I can reassure myself it's all in my head, and actually believe it. Really helps calm me down! But, I still limit my exposure. And that really sucks about your weight loss man! All I have to say is, "Vanilla ice cream on a heated brownie w/ hot fudge on top." Comfort food is VERY helpful to my psyche in these kind of circumstances!
 
boricuarage said:
I started making my own 1000 cal shakes.. milk, whey, walnut, oats,almonds,olive oil and bluberries...yummy
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Damn, that sounds delicious! I love blueberries! I am definitely going to try that recipe! Although I have Strawberry Whey. I wonder if that would go well? Kinda sounds like it would, I'm going to have to try it!
 
diablosho said:
Well, I can leave the house, but I always feel like I'm in imminent danger when I do, so I prefer not to (working on it though). I'm not on disability, as no one told me about that until the week before my separation date, so I'm working on that too. I'm also unemployed (I saved all my deployment money thank God, so I'm living on that with the GI Bill until I'm done with school-sitting in a room filled w/ strangers is terrifying for me, but I'm getting through it). Sometimes when I absolutely have to make a good appearance (appointments, etc.), I take a painkiller, and I'm myself again within an hour. I have noticed my symptoms getting better, though, as time has gone by. Not AS anxious as I used to be! It used to be so bad, I would get "tunnel hearing" (very strange, I know) and tunnel vision at the grocery store. But, as I continued to expose myself to those conditions, I have been getting better. Now I can reassure myself it's all in my head, and actually believe it. Really helps calm me down! But, I still limit my exposure. And that really sucks about your weight loss man! All I have to say is, "Vanilla ice cream on a heated brownie w/ hot fudge on top." Comfort food is VERY helpful to my psyche in these kind of circumstances!
Click to expand...

Actually the the tunnel vision and hearing are two very common symptoms with PTSD. It sounds to me like you are taking your own steps in using exposure therapy and are having some success. I think you would benefit well from a guided counseling and therapy routine. The fact that you took the steps yourself and have noticed the beneficial changes is incredibly productive and positive for you to overcome your current struggles. I wish the best for you.
 
Thanks a lot ryan! I'm a big believer in the whole mind over matter thing, it's kinda cool that I've been treating myself with some more professional-approach methods.
 
Given my profession at the moment, working in a locked psych unit, and having been attacked during a restraint in JUly, I find I have become very hyper aware, even when not at work I am on alert all the time, esp when I walk in the hospital, some days are better than others,my heart races, i start to get a sick feeling in my stomach I go white as can be, and I start to shake, like I said some days are better than others, I do know my triggers if you will, but trying to avoid is hard..... keep trying :) and good luck

TC
 
Man, that is what happened to me almost exactly! Have your symptoms gone down yet Boricua? Maybe with the holidays you'll feel better (God knows I do...I've gained 3 pounds since Christmas)!
--Brian
 
Brian
I wanted to write you.. I'm ok, it's better, but of course with meds it help. I be even happier when VA gives me a rating for my PTSD.
I hope you filed for it because you have it as well and I know you can get a really high rating.
My friend gets 100 percent for PTSD and nothing is wrong with him.

we deserved it more than anything..
 
boricuarage said:
Brian
I wanted to write you.. I'm ok, it's better, but of course with meds it help. I be even happier when VA gives me a rating for my PTSD.
I hope you filed for it because you have it as well and I know you can get a really high rating.
My friend gets 100 percent for PTSD and nothing is wrong with him.

we deserved it more than anything..
Click to expand...
Ha, I'm still fighting for disability (they don't know what's wrong with me, which is making it difficult for them to give me a percentage of disability)! Good luck on the PTSD though, I'll cross that bridge when I get to it! I'm glad you're feeling better though. I just got my SuperDrone in the mail Friday after waiting 1 1/2 months for customs to do their thing, so Merry Christmas to me! Planning on starting Jan. 3rd (I'm going to low dose it at 10mg for 3 to 4 weeks to see how us shorter people respond), I'll keep you informed! Have a GRRRRREAATTTT Day (best Tony the Tiger impression)!
--Brian
 
well that sucks!!!
I just got my boladrol and epi in the mail today. gotta get back to the gym before I start anything... weight is coming back, finally appetite again...
hey!! they use to call me Tony the tiger when I was little!!!
anywho... holla for a dolla and good luck on the superdrone!!!
 
HAHA! Ya, I got a few Boladrol's as well (and TONS of epi)! I really want to run Epi, but I am concerned about the hair sides (wish I knew about that BEFORE I bought about 10 cycles worth)! I wanted to run SD Bridged into Epi w/Dermacrine throughout, but now it's just SD w/Dermacrine throughout. Should be good run hopefully! Not really looking for anything massive, just looking to see how I react to SD (I've got a lot of SD, so wasting a little isn't a big deal to me). Anywho, keep me updated on your Epi cycle, I'm very interested! Gonna be BIG things this year!
--Brian
 
Being normal is boring! Gotta admit, all these problems only make life more interesting (well, that's how I like to look at it)! That's what is great about the gym! When life gets too "real", I just go to the gym for an intermission! And, as far as your weight loss, have you tried ECA? I'm using E/C/H.E.A.T. and I love the way it works. I'm not really using it for weight loss though. I'm using it to increase calorie expendature while I'm at the gym, to help blunt fat gain while bulking. I did use it on a cut once, and even though it took a few weeks for me to notice a difference in the mirror, I got down to 10% BF according to my scale (I think it was lower) in 1.5 months. You should look into it if you haven't already, I think you'd like it!
--Brian
 
I got alpha t2 and erase... people can't really notice my weight loss but I do... feel lighter and pants feel loose in the waist.. It's all good though, ain't lose muscle so it's all good....
 
Alpha-T2 is good too (it's got Rauwolscine/Alpha-Yohimbine in it), that's actually what I used the first time I ran the EC stack (great results). I'm using H.E.A.T. with EC now, and it's working great (probably not as well as the Alpha-T2 did though). Never tried Erase though! Let me know how that combination works out for ya!
--Brian
 
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