Anavar libido/anxiety update

Whisky

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Actually I understood his point completely. I understand that I'm going to suffer to get the kind of physique I want and that's all
not really what I was getting at bro. Yeah you’ll suffer mentally to get the physique you want but my first sentence was making the point that you still won’t be happy regardless of how you look, if your mental health is suffering.

I’m fortunate that I can say I don’t think I’ve ever had a mental health issue, but the last 12 months due to some harsh personal stuff have certainly been mentally challenging and the solutions haven’t been as clear cut (in my case getting even with a mate who shafted me badly, very badly, affected my kids lives etc). Things I thought would help to calm me mentally actually haven’t.

my point is that I think your not addressing the route cause of your mental illness and instead putting your hopes on achieving this physique as being the answer. In my humble opinion I suspect it won’t be, so you’ll have suffered and you won’t feel better for having done it, you’ll probably feel worse as it’s not what you hoped would be the case.

mental health isn’t a matter to take lightly. Physical health is far easier to understand and resolve.

Personally I would take a step back from the anabolics and try to understand better what the route cause of my anxiety/issues are and address them. Get professional help to do it, life’s too short for wasting time trying to deal with it by yourself

then come back to this **** when your heads in the right place. You’ll enjoy the process so much more. The only suffering you do should be training related. You should be enjoying the process of getting jacked, feeling strong etc
 

CroLifter

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Listen bro I am a nerd. I am also mentally ill so I truly believe that this **** is just irritating my already horrible anxiety, and yeah maybe ur right maybe it could be fake anavar. Whatever I'm using is making me extremely strong in the gym, anxious and my libido has increased substantially. I am not getting any kind of acne whatsoever and Im not getting bloated or puffy so I think it's safe to assume that whatever I'm on is at least something that isint converting to estrogen. Right?

Oh and calm your tits. How many holes did you punch in your wall before you replied to me 🤣
Bro, you are not ill. We are phuking with our hormones here, of course sh1t is bound to get wrecked. I was prescribed xanax due to panic attacks i was experiencing with crashed testosterone and on clomid (never took it though as i knew it would eventually resolve).

Also dhts dont agree with me. Higher dose masteron? Man i am a lunatic feeling like world is coming to an end any moment. I am talking about running out of the house or public transportation as i cant remain still.


Why torture yourself with compounds that dont agree with you?

As far as libido...yeah man it sucks. Feel like i just cant find it.

If i am off everything a little bit of aromasin sends it sky high. But on any dose of test it it almost non existent.


Elevated bp is like others said due to anxiety. Try some chamomille and lavender tea, used to help me sleep in the evenings while i was on 300mg of mast.

Thats the problem with ug sh1t. We dont know what it is actually.
 
Punkrocker

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Bro, you are not ill. We are phuking with our hormones here, of course sh1t is bound to get wrecked. I was prescribed xanax due to panic attacks i was experiencing with crashed testosterone and on clomid (never took it though as i knew it would eventually resolve).

Also dhts dont agree with me. Higher dose masteron? Man i am a lunatic feeling like world is coming to an end any moment. I am talking about running out of the house or public transportation as i cant remain still.


Why torture yourself with compounds that dont agree with you?

As far as libido...yeah man it sucks. Feel like i just cant find it.

If i am off everything a little bit of aromasin sends it sky high. But on any dose of test it it almost non existent.


Elevated bp is like others said due to anxiety. Try some chamomille and lavender tea, used to help me sleep in the evenings while i was on 300mg of mast.

Thats the problem with ug sh1t. We dont know what it is actually.
I just got back from the gym. Today was a rest day so I just did a little bit of calves abs and cardio. The stupid treadmills at my gym make you set the time and incline before you start even if you just want to do a manual run it like makes you set something up and I wanted to do my cardio for 35 minutes but it stopped at 30 and I wasn't finished yet and I was listening to the song I liked and I got super mad and punched the dashboard of the treadmill and yelled out loud and everybody was looking at me 🤣
I think I have roid rage from 25mg of anavar 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
 
KvanH

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Gents, you have lost focus.

Time for a teambuilding exercise, but which one? Hmmmm.

I know - please work together to secure pics of nurse at urgent care clinic.
They were these two nurses, but they had some kind of theme week at the hospital. Something to do with summer, high temp, beach.. Anyway the staff had a lot less clothes on.
20210219_090047.png

Unitex-Nursing-Shortage-1.jpg
 

CroLifter

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I just got back from the gym. Today was a rest day so I just did a little bit of calves abs and cardio. The stupid treadmills at my gym make you set the time and incline before you start even if you just want to do a manual run it like makes you set something up and I wanted to do my cardio for 35 minutes but it stopped at 30 and I wasn't finished yet and I was listening to the song I liked and I got super mad and punched the dashboard of the treadmill and yelled out loud and everybody was looking at me 🤣
I think I have roid rage from 25mg of anavar 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Yeah i behave like a 16 yo at 23 while on test. Drifting on the road etc hahaha its crazy

btw i love it.


Al kindsss of unstable individuals up in this b1tch!
 
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Jinsun

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not really what I was getting at bro. Yeah you’ll suffer mentally to get the physique you want but my first sentence was making the point that you still won’t be happy regardless of how you look, if your mental health is suffering.

I’m fortunate that I can say I don’t think I’ve ever had a mental health issue, but the last 12 months due to some harsh personal stuff have certainly been mentally challenging and the solutions haven’t been as clear cut (in my case getting even with a mate who shafted me badly, very badly, affected my kids lives etc). Things I thought would help to calm me mentally actually haven’t.

my point is that I think your not addressing the route cause of your mental illness and instead putting your hopes on achieving this physique as being the answer. In my humble opinion I suspect it won’t be, so you’ll have suffered and you won’t feel better for having done it, you’ll probably feel worse as it’s not what you hoped would be the case.

mental health isn’t a matter to take lightly. Physical health is far easier to understand and resolve.

Personally I would take a step back from the anabolics and try to understand better what the route cause of my anxiety/issues are and address them. Get professional help to do it, life’s too short for wasting time trying to deal with it by yourself

then come back to this **** when your heads in the right place. You’ll enjoy the process so much more. The only suffering you do should be training related. You should be enjoying the process of getting jacked, feeling strong etc
I really can't agree with this more. But you have to grow up to really understand this. Once you're young and you just blindly follow your mental urges, you wont think why you're doing something, at least not in a way you should be thinking about it.

You have some mental chit that is driving you to do this or that, in our example aas use, and you just do it, you don't see it as an extension of that mental imbalances. Everything that we huuumans do is an action towards balance, we are creatures of entropy non the less right, ... so @Punkrocker think about why you need to do this. And you would think that being bigger = being stronger. Nope. Taking drugs to balance out mental instability is making you weaker. A 120 pound girl could dismantle you with a few well placed words.

Think about it; who is driving the car? You? Or your fears, insecurities, etc.? Who is calling the shot really. Are you calm, present, ... or are you just blindfolding yourself and letting the horse drive to wherever? And let's be honest, we all know where the end is. Face yourself, that is all that is important, nothing else.

It took me quite some time to figure this out. And I'm in my 30's ... You could be 250 at 8%bf, but you'll be as weak as an 8'yo boy who just got his first milk teeth removed.

then come back to this **** when your heads in the right place. You’ll enjoy the process so much more. The only suffering you do should be training related. You should be enjoying the process of getting jacked, feeling strong etc
But that's just it, he isn't really doing this in order to enjoy him self, but in order to race blindfolded. Once he'll be able to stop and breath he'll understand, but that's years from now imo.
 

CroLifter

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but that's years from now imo.
Isnt that always the case? Its only later on that you get the ability to take an objective 3rd person view of your past situations.

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” — Søren Kierkegaard
 
KvanH

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Isnt that always the case? Its only later on that you get the ability to take an objective 3rd person view of your past situations.

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” — Søren Kierkegaard
You could try lsd or srooms for that 3rd person view.
 
Jinsun

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Isnt that always the case? Its only later on that you get the ability to take an objective 3rd person view of your past situations.

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” — Søren Kierkegaard
I mean, yes, it is, BUT, in one point in time, you start seeing your actions as externalized extensions of your inner instabilities. And at this point in your development, your actions become much more ... how would I say it ... in line with whats really best for you.
 
KvanH

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Lot of different psychedelics like psilocybin, mdma and ketamin (=dissociative to be exact) are gaining popularity in the field of therapy and psychological health care.

But I wouldn't advice a person with some kind of mental challenges to just grab some srooms and go do some soul searching = )
 
Jinsun

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Lot of different psychedelics like psilocybin, mdma and ketamin (=dissociative to be exact) are gaining popularity in the field of therapy and psychological health care.

But I wouldn't advice a person with some kind of mental challenges to just grab some srooms and go do some soul searching = )
I agree.

But I would advise it to people with anxiety, not to just start blasting shrooms, but to start meditating and to start shrooms with low dosages. Why? because with shrooms, your anxiety will become as clear as the chair or table you are looking in front of you with your eyes. You will deal with your anxiety in a way you never thought possible.

Starting out slow is the key. Drugs are, as we all know, dose dependent effect. So, just start with 0.5g or even less, and slowly, as you become stronger mentally (!!!), work your way up to bigger dosages.
 
Punkrocker

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Wow you guys are so insightful seriously. I can't believe what incredible feedback im getting from all of you. I don't know the cause of my insecurity in terms of my body image. I don't want to be some giant monster but I just want to look perfect in my what I consider that to be. Think like Steve reeves or like early 90s marky mark when he was ripped. Why do I want this? Because I want to stand out. I want to be different and unusual but in a well disciplined good way. Like a piece of Renaissance art. I am willing to sacrifice my mental health to do it however I think a big part of this is learning how to control my mental weakness like anxiety. the biggest thing I need to understand is that these symptoms are simply my anxiety and the more I learn about anxiety the more I am able to control it because once you fully understand that all these what seem to be health problem symptoms are just a manifestation from an imbalance of chemicals in your brain I think you can regain control which I have been making some improvements. But wow I really can't thank all you guys enough even that dude who got mad and wants to beat me up LOL. You all have given me such great input and open my eyes to a lot of things I didn't notice and are helping me through this and I can't thank you all enough lol I'm getting emotional as I type this🤣
 
Jinsun

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I don't know the cause of my insecurity in terms of my body image. I don't want to be some giant monster but I just want to look perfect in my what I consider that to be. Why do I want this? Because I want to stand out.
It's rather simple in regards to the structure not the cause (though usually it's the parents that are insecure and that trickles down to kids): you feel anxious because you have a bad self image, you don't feel like you are good enough when compared to other people and you are taking control of reality by taking control of your body, as it's the only thing you are capable of controlling really. Now your self worth will be determined by your body's image. That is a very fragile state to be in.

Anorexics or bulimics do the same thing. Anorexia is an extreme form of an anxiety disorder. They control their body. Anxiety = fear of death (once you get down to it), it's fear of chaos, and then you make order out of chaos by controlling the one thing you can control: your body. And so the reality conforms to your will and thus you regain some semblance of control, which eases the anxiety.

And thus, you are a big weakling, who can't stand the reality in it's true form: chaos. You hide from it and hope it wont come peaking from the corner or that the walls that you build are big enough so it wont be able to jump over. But the fear remains there and the bigger the walls, the bigger the anxiety. This is why it's bad to let it control you, in this case this means giving into body dysmorphia, bodybuilding, aas ...
 
Jinsun

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Try to understand: you are good enough, no matter how you look. Once you really feel this to be true, then it's going to be healthy to delve into this hobby.
 
Whisky

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Try to understand: you are good enough, no matter how you look. Once you really feel this to be true, then it's going to be healthy to delve into this hobby.
yes, this, all of this.

you say you want to look perfect in what consider to be perfect. But you acknowledge you have insecurity because of your body image.

having better arms or standout quads isn’t going to address that insecurity, theres always going to be something that isn’t ‘perfect’ in your eyes and therefore constant state of turmoil.

you need to love yourself as you are bro (yeah this is corny as **** but actually true, if you don’t rate yourself how the **** can you expect anyone else to. When was the last time you stepped back and said ‘you know what, damn my xxxx is spot on’

everyone has things that are awesome about them (same as we all have flaws) but instead of focusing on the negatives learn to celebrate your positives.

then building a body you want becomes about adding the extras to your bmw rather than trying to build the whole car from the outside
 

BBiceps

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I would also recommend to get OFF, reset and figure out your issues before you continue your cycle. Doing roids right now will only put a bandage on your issues, it might seem like the best solution now but it’s only temporary, don’t let the drugs fool you to believe anything else.

Also, I can guarantee that your cycles will be better when you’re mentally stable. If you feel like you have to take anything stay on a low TRT dose.

Good luck!
 
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CroLifter

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I mean, yes, it is, BUT, in one point in time, you start seeing your actions as externalized extensions of your inner instabilities. And at this point in your development, your actions become much more ... how would I say it ... in line with whats really best for you.
I am aware of the fact that my gear use stems from my insecurities and me attaching the idea of my ideal self to a certain body image.

I dont feel "inadequate" in any shape or form when i dont have that look. Its simply addictive.

Also the fact that you feel better on it doesnt help the situation at all.

And the fact that when you take gear your personality changes...i mean you know what i am talking about, you become more competitive and different things matter to you more than while off (at least thats in my case)

Its a problem...once you see what you perceive a "better" image of yourself, to let it go forever is hard. Keeps coming back to you..."i want to be like that again".


Maybe at one point it wont matter to me any longer so i drop it for good.
 

BBiceps

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I am aware of the fact that my gear use stems from my insecurities and me attaching the idea of my ideal self to a certain body image.

Also the fact that you feel better on it doesnt help the situation at all.


Its a problem...once you see what you perceive a "better" image of yourself, to let it go forever is hard. Keeps coming back to you..."i want to be like that again".


Maybe at one point it wont matter to me any longer so i drop it for good.
Well, we all take PED’s for our own reason, everyone have their own issues and insecurities, some more than others, the goal is to try to do it as “healthy and responsible” as possible, that’s why we trying to help each other out to be the best we can be.

and like any addict would say, it’s just more fun with drugs 😉
 
Jinsun

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And the fact that when you take gear your personality changes...i mean you know what i am talking about, you become more competitive and different things matter to you more than while off (at least thats in my case)
Yeah, I know. It's the one thing I wish aas wouldnt do. I change so much while on cycle that it's hilarious and then the crash after the cycle is the opposite; not funny at all. This is the reason I haven't done a cycle in 13 months now. The personality changes and then the personality/anxiety/sleep problems are just something I cant mentally afford now. It's much different for b$c. But cycling is imo mentally so unhealthy that most will eventually stop bc of it or start to b$c.
 

BBiceps

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Yeah, I know. It's the one thing I wish aas wouldnt do. I change so much while on cycle that it's hilarious and then the crash after the cycle is the opposite; not funny at all. This is the reason I haven't done a cycle in 13 months now. The personality changes and then the personality/anxiety/sleep problems are just something I cant mentally afford now. It's much different for b$c. But cycling is imo mentally so unhealthy that most will eventually stop bc of it or start to b$c.
I feel this is very individual, for me, I don’t “feel” anything OFF or ON gear, sure, strength wise it’s a big difference (strength is the only reason I take gear) but gear have no mental effect on me.
 
Punkrocker

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Man all of you guys are on fire you should all have your own therapist clinics lol. As far as my cycle goes I'm going to continue as I am into my third week and plan to be on this stuff for like six weeks. I'm actually starting to see some results in the mirror now looking much harder and Fuller and people are complimenting me and you know something I probably would have died by now if there was an actual physical problem so I'm just going to stick to it and finish it off but I'm glad that you guys are here during this little rocky mental time for me even though I am doing something that I probably shouldn't be doing I really appreciate all of you
 
solidsnake

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My honest opinion? Fuk that. Why are you putting yourself through all this Shiite just look good? Imagine the stress your body is going through.I’d sack the whole lot and rethink the whole plan. Make a plan with stuff that ain’t gonna fuk ya mental health
 
Punkrocker

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My honest opinion? Fuk that. Why are you putting yourself through all this Shiite just look good? Imagine the stress your body is going through.I’d sack the whole lot and rethink the whole plan. Make a plan with stuff that ain’t gonna fuk ya mental health
Alot of this is me allowing my mental health to get the best of me. If I can learn to work with it then maybe I can overcome this. I should be able to use a reasonable dose of anavar without freaking out. It's not like I'm on tren or something
 

CroLifter

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Yeah, I know. It's the one thing I wish aas wouldnt do. I change so much while on cycle that it's hilarious and then the crash after the cycle is the opposite; not funny at all. This is the reason I haven't done a cycle in 13 months now. The personality changes and then the personality/anxiety/sleep problems are just something I cant mentally afford now. It's much different for b$c. But cycling is imo mentally so unhealthy that most will eventually stop bc of it or start to b$c.
Off topic, but i found out that you can even manipulate how you feel on cycle by manipulating your estrogen levels. If I let them rise and on test only, i feel more like my off cycle me.

If i keep them lower or add in dry androgens, i am different.


OP, higher estrogen levels definitely help you feel more serene, therefore lowering any potential anxiety.
 
Jinsun

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Off topic, but i found out that you can even manipulate how you feel on cycle by manipulating your estrogen levels. If I let them rise and on test only, i feel more like my off cycle me.

If i keep them lower or add in dry androgens, i am different.


OP, higher estrogen levels definitely help you feel more serene, therefore lowering any potential anxiety.
I was thinking of running ralox for the duration of the whole cycle next time and let estro rise to, idk ... 40's ...
 

CroLifter

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I was thinking of running ralox for the duration of the whole cycle next time and let estro rise to, idk ... 40's ...
In my case over 200 test with no ai i get very mellow at times, too mellow for my liking at times. Like tearing up for little reason.
So its not really all that good.

I vividly remmber adding in tren, damn son, talk about an 180 degree change in mental state, from crying at Saving Private Ryan to imagining guts flying through the air while unloading a rifle mag at the paper target.


Like you said this sh1t is potent and dangerous, but you actually get used to personality changes and come to expect them so you dont find it that disturbing, at least i dont

It certainly causes issues for people around you who cant figure out who the f you actually are hahah. Quite a few individuals inhabiting this shell.

I have come to enjoy 2 different persons actually.

But despite beinng aggressive and amped, sleep is miless better on test than off. While off my cortisol wreaks havoc and i tend to stress about bullsh1t.

Its not all roses, but it certainly isnt all that bad when it comes to gear.



Try this little experiment next time you cycle, take note of songs you feel like listening and compare to the songs you normally listen to while off. You will be surprised i am telling ya.



Again too much rambling on my part. Like always, its evening and i am bored, so lets close this one out with one of my favourites

 
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Punkrocker

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Ok guys I have great news! Today was my first semi normal day! I'm 3 weeks in. Maybe my body is getting used to the gear at this point and im starting to level off? Also my coffee intake has been cut waaaay back and that's definitely helped as well. I think it should be smooth sailing from here on in. I'll keep you guys updated! God bless!
 
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