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This Girl

x_muscle

Active member
Ok this semester i met this girl in my class. She was sitting behind me, at the beginning of the semester i didn’t even notice she exist, then half way through the semester i had a group project, and she was in my group. She seemed really into me, she was really friendly. We exchanged calls and emails about the school project, then i we started to hang on campus together after class, study in the library. At the beginning i thought im lowering my standards because she isn’t the prettiest girl out there, but the more i talked to here the more i became attracted to here. Finally at the last week at school i finally got the balls and asked here out. She smiled and said sure, so we agreed to go out after the finals are over.

Well problem is she is really shy, so am i. At the begging she had an a excuse to call me and talk to me because the school project, but now that school is over, i didn’t here from here. I called here once to see if i can set a date first she said she is busy, and now she is sick. Im sure she is saying the truth.

Problem is im on cycle, and i cant stop obsessing about here. At the begging when i met here i talked to here like any other chick i know, but the more i grew attached to here the more anxious i feel. My heart is beating fat, and my speech sucks ass. I also feel she has changed her feeling towards me. she used to call me or email me every couple of days, but now i haven’t here from here from here for a week!!!!

I cant stop checking my cell phone to see if she called, and im checking my email every 10min. I cant help it. I don’t want to call here again and show here im that desperate.

Is she ditching me or is it that dam test making me crazy. Dam I cant stop thinking about here. I cant believe I didn’t even care about here in the when I first knew here.!!!!
 
In my experience - yes, she's ditching you (or whatever you want to call it).

I went through an eerily similar situation my frosh. year of college.
 
Step one: Relax

Step two: Stop obsessing

Step three: If you haven't set a date yet, call her and do it. If she says no then that's fine. The build-up is the worst part esp. for a shy guy.
 
Yeah dude, the initial attraction she felt for you aptly stated in your own words..At the begging when i met here i talked to here like any other chick i know. She most likely recognized the anxious vibe you were resonating and got a little spooked. I am not advocating playing that aloof, hard-to-get game, but just go back to being yourself. That's obviously what attracted her in the first place...Also, I hope you displayed better grammatical uh, finesse while you were in her class!
 
jmh80 said:
In my experience - yes, she's ditching you (or whatever you want to call it).

I went through an eerily similar situation my frosh. year of college.
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Also take note that he said she's very shy like him, so it could definitaly be simply she's to shy to call with nothing to say.
 
I say- she is a little nervous! Here's what you do:

You call her and say, you know I really like being your FRIEND so lets not call this dating........bla bla bla...... But how about going to a movie, I know a good one you might like, you know just to hang out, no strings, nothing.

If she says yes, start slowly, dont push it, dont try to kiss her or nothing! Be a gentleman. Then maybe ask her to lunch etc just so she can slowly get to know you, since you have no "project"

If she says no, or doesnt call you back within one day, she is not interested at all.

And just cause your on cycle doesnt mean go for the first thing you see! LOL thats how young men get in trouble :)
 
GDogg - I've just seen myself get the exact same way he described and subsequently the female got the hell out real fast!

Maybe she is just shy though and can't handle the attention.


Might as well try FnF's idea - she's obviously a female.
 
jmh80 said:
GDogg - I've just seen myself get the exact same way he described and subsequently the female got the hell out real fast!

Maybe she is just shy though and can't handle the attention.


Might as well try FnF's idea - she's obviously a female.
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Never take a females advice on women :ntome:
 
definatly chill out on the obsession part...go rub a few out and see if that helps. If you call her daily, then stop, see if she returns a call after a week of not calling her.
 
FitnFirm said:
I say- she is a little nervous! Here's what you do:

You call her and say, you know I really like being your FRIEND so lets not call this dating........bla bla bla...... But how about going to a movie, I know a good one you might like, you know just to hang out, no strings, nothing.

If she says yes, start slowly, dont push it, dont try to kiss her or nothing! Be a gentleman. Then maybe ask her to lunch etc just so she can slowly get to know you, since you have no "project"

If she says no, or doesnt call you back within one day, she is not interested at all.

And just cause your on cycle doesnt mean go for the first thing you see! LOL thats how young men get in trouble :)
Click to expand...

agreed...good advice
 
Here is what im going to do.

Im going to call here one last time, and if she didnt call me call within a week or so. Then its over.

The wired thing is that we both volunteered to work for the same research lab for the summer, so it will be uncomfortable working with her, if she ditched me.
 
x_muscle said:
Here is what im going to do.

Im going to call here one last time, and if she didnt call me call within a week or so. Then its over.

The wired thing is that we both volunteered to work for the same research lab for the summer, so it will be uncomfortable working with her, if she ditched me.
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Ok, let's get some things out of the way. First, its no big deal that you both are shy. Don't sweat sounding nervous. Next, be very careful that you haven't missed anything. I was in a similar situation once and it wasn't until I was taking a dump years later that it occured to me that I totally misunderstood the situation. Assuming you haven't, just don't call her period. STOP. Since you have to spend time together this summer, just do the following. Walk up to her smiling and lay the compliments thick. If she doesn't turn to butter, you can assuming the worst and tell her that she looks fat if you are that kind of guy. Anyhow, if she does turn to butter, follow up right away with a date and time.

Play it cool bro. Its hardly ever over...
 
VitaminT said:
Assuming you haven't, just don't call her period. STOP. Since you have to spend time together this summer, just do the following. Walk up to her smiling and lay the compliments thick. If she doesn't turn to butter, you can assuming the worst and tell her that she looks fat if you are that kind of guy. Anyhow, if she does turn to butter, follow up right away with a date and time.

Play it cool bro. Its hardly ever over...
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IMHO, ignore this post. :wtf:
 
Update:

I didn’t call her or anything, but i got an email from here saying that there is something is wrong with here cell phone, and the phone address book got deleted. Se also said she tried to call me earlier, and asked me to message here my cell phone number. She motioned she is still feeling sick, but improving.....blah blah blah.

So i dont know how to interpret her email; i dont know if she is lying or saying the truth. Should i call her back or ignore here. I need some advice here guys.

Anyway spending 2 hours in the gym sure feels good ………..
 
x_muscle said:
Update:

I didn’t call her or anything, but i got an email from here saying that there is something is wrong with here cell phone, and the phone address book got deleted. Se also said she tried to call me earlier, and asked me to message here my cell phone number. She motioned she is still feeling sick, but improving.....blah blah blah.

So i dont know how to interpret her email; i dont know if she is lying or saying the truth. Should i call her back or ignore here. I need some advice here guys.

Anyway spending 2 hours in the gym sure feels good ………..
Click to expand...

If you do anything about this, just *text* her your number. Keep it short and simple, text the number and leave it to her to make the next move. Also, if you decide to text your number, don't worry about it afterwards. If she calls, she calls, if not who gives a shvt, there are many many more women out there who will appriciate you! So if you want, put the ball in her court, but just remember if she doesn't follow through it is her loss, not yours :head:
 
yes she ditching, women always IMO can't seems to tell you the truth, they rather play this type of game. personally i rather she say it , "i'm done with you, **** off!" communication is always a problem or a weakest for people.. personally i rather she tell me the truth, that she not interested in me, and i can move on... but then again, i'm bitter and jaded, from past relationship.. so fucck it.
cheers,
joe
 
I dont think you should play hard to get or obsess about her, be yourself, and you are curious, so lets get some answers to lay your mind at ease a bit. Your living between two healthy places, in a good relationship and single.
I think shes prolly got an issue with herself and not you. It seems like she was geniunely interested in you and when it started being apparent that she has a chance she started over thinking it. She is distancing herself cause she prolly has something about her life or self she is embarrased about or ashamed of. So to save the embarrasment she is keeping you at a comfortable distance. Now it is hard to rationalise with a womens tactics but she may have been treated poorly and now every man to follow is going to pay for it. IMO just say EG> "I have gotten to know you a bit and i am interested to know more about you, your beautiful inside and out and im wondering what you think about me. Its hard to act like friends but if thats what you want im still there for you"
Theres nothing wrong with honesty, it will always prevail. In scenario one shes totally uncomfortable and never calls you again, if you cant be honest with someone and talk any prospects of love are futile. scenario two its still abit awkward but lays to rest any thoughts she been contemplating based upon your reactions. If you tell the truth you cannot feel bad you have to move on. You said yourself that you dont act the same so, you dont appear to be the same person she once liked. Theres a good possiblity that she is genuinly sick and make sure to adress it but dont accuse her of making excuses just say how it must suck for her, sympathise a little.
 
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