Meet is in the Boston area.
I wore mechanic gloves, coated my thighs in baby powder or ballsack powder, and had suit slippers (grocery bags can work instead like mentioned) I weighed 212-215, and got it on within 10-15 min by myself. Just takes practice.
I raised the bar on the smith machine about head height, put a strap on one of the bar ends, and hung and shimmied. Maybe that can work for you? If you have people to help, you can have two people each grab a strap and yank up while you squat down. Once it's over your hips, the straps are easy.
You'll get it eventually dude. I gave up the first time trying also.