Marriage......An open discussion.

[DAdams91982]

I'll throw in my two cents... I am just waiting to seperate from good old uncle sam, so I can actually be together. Then the union will happen.

That is UNLESS.. I ACCIDENTLY knock her up first.

Adams

 

[DAdams91982]

Perhaps you should really read the bible, and note the utter mass of disgusting things that occur, not only condoned but ordered by that fraud of a "moral" being you call god.

Back up now. Not condoning the previous argument, but dont go calling my faith a fraud. I can tolerate alot of things, and disrespect, but to attack someones faith is uncouth at best.

Adams

 

[Trauma1]

I'll throw in my two cents... I am just waiting to seperate from good old uncle sam, so I can actually be together. Then the union will happen.

That is UNLESS.. I ACCIDENTLY knock her up first.

Adams

Rain coats' are your friend!

 

[DAdams91982]

Rain coats' are your friend!

You work in the hospital... thats your duty to say that.

Plus... I want the opposite... I want her belly fat as hell with my seed.

Oh yes my friend.... oh yes.

Adams

 

[Mrs. Gimpy!]

wow its toasty in here.... meanies :run but in all seriousness, i really do not see the need in disrespecting others. expressing one's opinion is one thing but verbally attacking another person without true reason is not right.


anyways, stepping off my soap box, i used to have more screaming fits on the road, but that rarely happens nowadays. It only happens when some stupid fcukr nearly ended my life just so he could get to "point b" 5 seconds faster. I just can't seem to let that stuff go

 

[AE14]

Perhaps you should really read the bible, and note the utter mass of disgusting things that occur, not only condoned but ordered by that fraud of a "moral" being you call god.

well said..... the bible can be an utterly horrible book in many ways.

the fact that this thread is going in the direction it is, is quite sad. To each his own, no one here is being hurt by another so lets make sure that these attacks remain civil or just walk away:hammer:

 

[Trauma1]

You work in the hospital... thats your duty to say that.

Plus... I want the opposite... I want her belly fat as hell with my seed.

Oh yes my friend.... oh yes.

Adams

Awesome man! Hopefully sometime after the olympia the mrs. and i will be trying for the first little trauma.

 

[Trauma1]

well said..... the bible can be an utterly horrible book in many ways.

the fact that this thread is going in the direction it is, is quite sad. To each his own, no one here is being hurt by another so lets make sure that these attacks remain civil or just walk away:hammer:

Agreed. I don't argue religion or politics because it's absolutely pointless, so lets keep them both out of the thread. Everyones beliefs should be respected even if you don't agree with them.

Now back to a discussion about our lovely marriage life haha!

 

[Iron Lungz]

I feel the same way. Those two topics are best suited for another sub-forum. I respect everyone's stance, as long it's not pushed on me.

Agreed. I don't argue religion or politics because it's absolutely pointless, so lets keep them both out of the thread. Everyones beliefs should be respected even if you don't agree with them.

Now back to a discussion about our lovely marriage life haha!

 

[dsade]

I feel the same way. Those two topics are best suited for another sub-forum. I respect everyone's stance, as long it's not pushed on me.

My point exactly..I did not bring religion or the bible into the discussion - this was my incredibly blunt way of saying "keep it OUT of the discussion".

 

[Irish Cannon]

Ok, so this was supposed to be a discussion on marriage. Last time I checked we were talking about road rage. Now it's religion? Am I correct?

I'd like to get it back to the marriage discussion.

Pros and cons of marriage...GOGOGOGOGOGO!!

 

[Trauma1]

Now that road rage is out of the way, lets discuss finance. I can honestly say that my wife controls most of it mainly because she's very good at it. It's not that i'm THAT bad with money, however i do like to go a little crazy with the spending on ocassion.

Especially now that we're in the process of buying a home she's become the money nazi! :frustrate However, it's for good reason.

I will have a ZO6 vette oneday, oh yes, i will!

 

[DAdams91982]

Now that road rage is out of the way, lets discuss finance. I can honestly say that my wife controls most of it mainly because she's very good at it. It's not that i'm THAT bad with money, however i do like to go a little crazy with the spending on ocassion.

Especially now that we're in the process of buying a home she's become the money nazi! :frustrate However, it's for good reason.

I will have a ZO6 vette oneday, oh yes, i will!

I am in the same boat... my girl is a fvckin brain child with money... me not so much.

Adams

 

[B5150]

marriage is seriously overrated... the sanctity of marriage is dead... i'd rather just have a live in girlfriend who keeps her own apartment.. its easier and less headaches

I would have to disagree. Bad marriages are giving marriage a bad rap.

 

[B5150]

One of the charachteristics i love about my wife is she likes football(College and Pro) and baseball. It makes going to and watching games SOO much easier.

On of the characteristics I love about mine is that she can tolerate me

I will be the first to admit that I got the better end of the deal.

 

[Trauma1]

On of the characteristics I love about mine is that she can tolerate me

I will be the first to admit that I got the better end of the deal.

I have no idea how my wife tolerates me.

I agree that i also got the better end of the deal. She effectively makes me a better person in every way. When i realized this, i knew she was the one for me.

 

[ReaperX]

Invalid Link Removed

 

[AE14]

in terms of finances I am in charge, out of sheer necessity. She almost bankrupted us a few years ago when our daughter was born, so since then I take care of it. I always look at it that we all have strengths and weaknesses and math is not her strong suit

 

[dsade]

Barbie: "Math is Hard."

We're both in charge of finances, but since I run the business, I am a bit more cognizant of our overall picture. Unfortunately, combining households is massively expensive - as are growing kids - so there is more pressure to try to impress and reassure.

Honestly, I would recommend 3 accounts - one combined account for bills, rent, etc and SHARED entertainment, then 1 account for each of you to do with what you please.

 

[Trauma1]

Barbie: "Math is Hard."

We're both in charge of finances, but since I run the business, I am a bit more cognizant of our overall picture. Unfortunately, combining households is massively expensive - as are growing kids - so there is more pressure to try to impress and reassure.

Honestly, I would recommend 3 accounts - one combined account for bills, rent, etc and SHARED entertainment, then 1 account for each of you to do with what you please.

This is exactly how we have it set up also. I agree that it works well.

 

[Usf97j4x4]

I figure we need a nice and healthy marriage discussion here on AM.

I'll start........How many of you guys can't stand the wife when driving? Now i say this because my wife likes to yell at me when i feel the need to curse out some moron that has no clue on driving in general. If it were up to my wife......everyone would be happy all the time. LOL :blink:

The passenger driver mentality KILLS ME!!! :hammer:

My wife was yelling at me in the car the other day saying I am too slow a driver even though I was already 15 over the limit. About 20 seconds later I was pulled over and am now the proud owner of a $180 ticket.

That biotch.

 

[Usf97j4x4]

Barbie: "Math is Hard."

We're both in charge of finances, but since I run the business, I am a bit more cognizant of our overall picture. Unfortunately, combining households is massively expensive - as are growing kids - so there is more pressure to try to impress and reassure.

Honestly, I would recommend 3 accounts - one combined account for bills, rent, etc and SHARED entertainment, then 1 account for each of you to do with what you please.

Great advice. My wife and I have been married a year and finally got the finances situated.

We each have our own checking account and have one joint checking account for the big bills. Additionally we have a joint savings account. I handle all of the investments and she does the bills.

 

[AE14]

that right there is friggin hilarious :goodpost:


edit: two posts up

 

[B5150]

I am the provider and my wife is the caretaker. That is the arrangement today because we are both in agreement that her value is much greater in the care for our daughter. She is a great mom who is the primary reason I have such a capable and competent little girl. She used to work and can make a afir amount of money but there is always time to work but little time to raise my last one...our only one together.

We have three budgets. I budget our household expenses including groceries, utilities, gas and gymnastics and the likes. This goes direct deposit into her account. There is a slight buffer in the budget but as life is there is never enough. If she is thrifty she can save and splurge. If she runs short because of an unexpected expense I transfer her some money...there are always unexpected expenses.

My account is for our car payment, mortgage, my gas allowance as well as support for my two older ones who live out of state.

We have a third account for savings that I try to skim off of my budget whenever possible. The opportunity for OT at work usually allows for this from time to time.

I do have a 401k at work for 10% (the company matches 50% up to the first 6%) so at this time with child support, a little one in gymnastics there is no direct deposit for savings yet.

But quite honestly, at my age and in my experience, I will ALWAYS have debt of some sort, there will NEVER be enough money so ENJOY your self (responsibly and within reason) because the right time never seems to come but the days do pass rather quickly. I am just now beginning to DO the things I want to do instead of waiting for the right time. The right time is when you decide it is. Life is over when it decides it is. There is no do over

 

[Palo Alto Labs]

Now that road rage is out of the way, lets discuss finance. I can honestly say that my wife controls most of it mainly because she's very good at it. It's not that i'm THAT bad with money, however i do like to go a little crazy with the spending on ocassion.

Especially now that we're in the process of buying a home she's become the money nazi! :frustrate However, it's for good reason.

I will have a ZO6 vette oneday, oh yes, i will!

get the house now... in 6-8 years... it will buy you the Z06! I always tell my gf "work hard at school now... pappa needs a z06 someday!" cant wait to get a vette... what a sexy car. Im thinking of going for a 60s instead of a new one thou... i dont like fitting in.

Im trying to teach my gf the power of money. All it takes is a little each year and you can retire nicely. Its so easy to get caught up buying stupid little things that add up to just more junk.



lets keep the religious arguments to the 'other forums' where they tolerate closed minded thinking. i think the bible says something about not judging others. its somewhere on page 1.

 

[Usf97j4x4]

I am the provider and my wife is the caretaker. That is the arrangement today because we are both in agreement that her value is much greater in the care for our daughter. She is a great mom who is the primary reason I have such a capable and competent little girl. She used to work and can make a afir amount of money but there is always time to work but little time to raise my last one...our only one together.

We have three budgets. I budget our household expenses including groceries, utilities, gas and gymnastics and the likes. This goes direct deposit into her account. There is a slight buffer in the budget but as life is there is never enough. If she is thrifty she can save and splurge. If she runs short because of an unexpected expense I transfer her some money...there are always unexpected expenses.

My account is for our car payment, mortgage, my gas allowance as well as support for my two older ones who live out of state.

We have a third account for savings that I try to skim off of my budget whenever possible. The opportunity for OT at work usually allows for this from time to time.

I do have a 401k at work for 10% (the company matches 50% up to the first 6%) so at this time with child support, a little one in gymnastics there is no direct deposit for savings yet.

But quite honestly, at my age and in my experience, I will ALWAYS have debt of some sort, there will never be enough money so ENJOY your self (responsibly and within reason) because the right time never seems to come but the days do pass rather quickly. I am just now beginning to DO the things I want to do instead of waiting for the right time. The right time is when you decide it is. Life is over when it decides it is. There is no do over

With no kids we put EVERY extra dollar into our IRA and 401k plans. I'm almost 26 and she's 28 and we've already saved about 50k between the 2 accounts. I am averaging 30% on them too.

Finances are the hardest part of marriage. Whenever we fight it is usually related to money. Now that we've got it straight our relationship has really improved. The 1st year of marriage is so difficult its no wonder the divorce rate is high... although there's less religious pressure these days.

We're catholic - even if we hated eachother we'd stick it out, kids or not.

 

[Trauma1]

I'd also like to hear about everyone experience(s) with their In-laws. I'm myself actually get along very well with my In-laws, so i consider myself pretty LUCKY! It surely makes things much easier overall. They don't interfer in our marriage in anyway and are supportive when need be. I almost thought it was too good to be true. :blink:

I actually even get along pretty good with my wife's two sisters.

Living 3 hours away from my In-laws makes my situation even better. They actually wouldn't show up unannoucned anyway, but it's still nice to have that extended reassurance.

I have quite a few buddies that have nightmare In-laws that have almost ruined their marriages. This is why i say i'm lucky because i don't have to endure as many additional headaches along the way.

Lets hear some of your stories.

 

[B5150]

Finances are the hardest part of marriage. Whenever we fight it is usually related to money. Now that we've got it straight our relationship has really improved.

Super! That means the sex problem/issue is on it's way

The 1st year of marriage is so difficult its no wonder the divorce rate is high... although there's less religious pressure these days.

We're catholic - even if we hated eachother we'd stick it out, kids or not.

I understand. BUT if the kids know you hate each other (kids discern MUCH more than you even know) it produces adults that will be in marriages with people they hate too.

Just some food for thought

 

[Trauma1]

get the house now... in 6-8 years... it will buy you the Z06! I always tell my gf "work hard at school now... pappa needs a z06 someday!" cant wait to get a vette... what a sexy car. Im thinking of going for a 60s instead of a new one thou... i dont like fitting in.

Im trying to teach my gf the power of money. All it takes is a little each year and you can retire nicely. Its so easy to get caught up buying stupid little things that add up to just more junk.



lets keep the religious arguments to the 'other forums' where they tolerate closed minded thinking. i think the bible says something about not judging others. its somewhere on page 1.

Man i love a nice vette!

I'm the one that needed to learn the power of money......and i think the wife would say i've come a long way.

However, MAN is really want that Z06 RIGHT NOW lol! :lol:

Yes, i know.......the house first, then a nice family, so maybe oneday my dream will be my reality. Actually, i'll be happy with whatever i have. I've grown to accept my limitations, but i continually strive to better myself and my family all the time. T1 may actually be going back to school for Physician Assistant soon.

 

[Trauma1]

I am the provider and my wife is the caretaker. That is the arrangement today because we are both in agreement that her value is much greater in the care for our daughter. She is a great mom who is the primary reason I have such a capable and competent little girl. She used to work and can make a afir amount of money but there is always time to work but little time to raise my last one...our only one together.

We have three budgets. I budget our household expenses including groceries, utilities, gas and gymnastics and the likes. This goes direct deposit into her account. There is a slight buffer in the budget but as life is there is never enough. If she is thrifty she can save and splurge. If she runs short because of an unexpected expense I transfer her some money...there are always unexpected expenses.

My account is for our car payment, mortgage, my gas allowance as well as support for my two older ones who live out of state.

We have a third account for savings that I try to skim off of my budget whenever possible. The opportunity for OT at work usually allows for this from time to time.

I do have a 401k at work for 10% (the company matches 50% up to the first 6%) so at this time with child support, a little one in gymnastics there is no direct deposit for savings yet.

But quite honestly, at my age and in my experience, I will ALWAYS have debt of some sort, there will NEVER be enough money so ENJOY your self (responsibly and within reason) because the right time never seems to come but the days do pass rather quickly. I am just now beginning to DO the things I want to do instead of waiting for the right time. The right time is when you decide it is. Life is over when it decides it is. There is no do over

My wife has always put the max into her 401k and already has a very substantial amount to date. She got me started doing it about 4 years ago. Best move i ever made.

Not to mention my wife works for the government (in the V.A. system as a nurse), so she gets a pension when 20 years are completed.

I think i may need to become a V.A. nurse myself.......i like the word "pension"!

 

[Usf97j4x4]

Super! That means the sex problem/issue is on it's way I understand. BUT if the kids know you hate each other (kids discern MUCH more than you even know) it produces adults that will be in marriages with people they hate too.

Just some food for thought

I'd like to think we wouldn't have kids if we hated eachother

 

[Usf97j4x4]

I'd also like to hear about everyone experience(s) with their In-laws. I'm myself actually get along very well with my In-laws, so i consider myself pretty LUCKY! It surely makes things much easier overall. They don't interfer in our marriage in anyway and are supportive when need be. I almost thought it was too good to be true. :blink:

I actually even get along pretty good with my wife's two sisters.

Living 3 hours away from my In-laws makes my situation even better. They actually wouldn't show up unannoucned anyway, but it's still nice to have that extended reassurance.

I have quite a few buddies that have nightmare In-laws that have almost ruined their marriages. This is why i say i'm lucky because i don't have to endure as many additional headaches along the way.

Lets hear some of your stories.

Funny... my in laws are great! Her dad cut us a check for $1000 this weekend just because he had a great month and wanted to help us out as we are restoring a period bathroom in our house... I was blown away. They live about 7 hours away which helps b/c if they were close i'm sure we'd eventually get into it. I am a very politically opinionated person and me and my wifes dad are bound to clash one day.

I've actually gone on a few vacations with them and didnt completely pull my head off - I think that speaks volumes.

My wife has 2 brothers... I have 3 sisters so I never experienced what it was like to have a brother. Now I come over there for Christmas and get tackled and have to fight them both before I even put my stuff down lol.

Now I feel BAD for my wife because my parents are terrible people. She, if anyone, has total freedom to ***** about her in laws!!

 

[Trauma1]

Funny... my in laws are great! Her dad cut us a check for $1000 this weekend just because he had a great month and wanted to help us out as we are restoring a period bathroom in our house... I was blown away. They live about 7 hours away which helps b/c if they were close i'm sure we'd eventually get into it. I am a very politically opinionated person and me and my wifes dad are bound to clash one day.

I've actually gone on a few vacations with them and didnt completely pull my head off - I think that speaks volumes.

My wife has 2 brothers... I have 3 sisters so I never experienced what it was like to have a brother. Now I come over there for Christmas and get tackled and have to fight them both before I even put my stuff down lol.

Now I feel BAD for my wife because my parents are terrible people. She, if anyone, has total freedom to ***** about her in laws!!

I went on a 10 day cruise with my wife's family a few years ago and i actually didn't want to throw any of them overboard for the most part. Well, her older sister gets on my nerves at times.

Her older sister is VERY organized and has the whole day planned/mapped out EVERYDAY. I'm not like that all the time, especially when i'm on vacation. There are times i like to play it by ear and go where the day takes me. Usually that's either by the pool or the ocean with a beer in hand.

Now i'm a pretty organized person myself, but she takes it to a horrible extreme. So, she almost went overboard......oh i would have thrown her a life jacket.

 

[AE14]

I'd also like to hear about everyone experience(s) with their In-laws. I'm myself actually get along very well with my In-laws, so i consider myself pretty LUCKY! It surely makes things much easier overall. They don't interfer in our marriage in anyway and are supportive when need be. I almost thought it was too good to be true. :blink:

I actually even get along pretty good with my wife's two sisters.

Living 3 hours away from my In-laws makes my situation even better. They actually wouldn't show up unannoucned anyway, but it's still nice to have that extended reassurance.

I have quite a few buddies that have nightmare In-laws that have almost ruined their marriages. This is why i say i'm lucky because i don't have to endure as many additional headaches along the way.

Lets hear some of your stories.

I hope we have some time for this.

LEts see, my wife and I have been together 11 years this Sunday, and from the beginning I was not approved of, b/c I was the poor kid from the other side of town kinda thing.

Over time and many fights, my m/i/l (mother in law) and I buried the hatchet and became good friends. Not so with my father in law. In August of 05 my m/i/l died of cancer at 55. We contemplated allowing her father to move in for a bit, howevber his behavior became as such that it just did not work. He started chasing ass, and had a women living with him within the year. On July 4 they arew to be married #3 for him and #4 for her.

HE also changed his appearance. He was a typical button down-khakis guy, now he dresses in all black and black leather, grew out a mullett with a pony tail and wears excessive amounts of jewlery. He also became more overt in his discussions about his sex life, discussions began to take place in front of my daughter 4 at the time, my nephew now 7 and my 4.5 year old neice. This escalated tensions that almost cost me my marriage, coupled with him downloading pornographic pictures of himself and his girlfirend on my computer. Due to his behavior our daughter is no longer allowed at his house, my poor wife is in therapy and they refuse to be in my presence.

All in all, solid relationship

There is much, much more, but figured I would let this digest. Dont even get me started on his competitive nature with me

 

[Trauma1]

I hope we have some time for this.

LEts see, my wife and I have been together 11 years this Sunday, and from the beginning I was not approved of, b/c I was the poor kid from the other side of town kinda thing.

Over time and many fights, my m/i/l (mother in law) and I buried the hatchet and became good friends. Not so with my father in law. In August of 05 my m/i/l died of cancer at 55. We contemplated allowing her father to move in for a bit, howevber his behavior became as such that it just did not work. He started chasing ass, and had a women living with him within the year. On July 4 they arew to be married #3 for him and #4 for her.

HE also changed his appearance. He was a typical button down-khakis guy, now he dresses in all black and black leather, grew out a mullett with a pony tail and wears excessive amounts of jewlery. He also became more overt in his discussions about his sex life, discussions began to take place in front of my daughter 4 at the time, my nephew now 7 and my 4.5 year old neice. This escalated tensions that almost cost me my marriage, coupled with him downloading pornographic pictures of himself and his girlfirend on my computer. Due to his behavior our daughter is no longer allowed at his house, my poor wife is in therapy and they refuse to be in my presence.

All in all, solid relationship

There is much, much more, but figured I would let this digest. Dont even get me started on his competitive nature with me

Good god i'm sorry to hear about this brother.

That is one twisted situation man. I seriously wish you the best outcome with this, however i know that some things are better off left alone. The hard part though is when family is directly involved.

 

[AE14]

it is a bit much I agree, but it is good that she has finally realized that he is a turd.

It is funny, when I am around they refuse to get out of the car, or come in the house. I have allowed them access to our daughter at our house in our state, that is it. He will try to bring it up on the phone to our daughter, but she knows its a no go

 

[Trauma1]

it is a bit much I agree, but it is good that she has finally realized that he is a turd.
It is funny, when I am around they refuse to get out of the car, or come in the house. I have allowed them access to our daughter at our house in our state, that is it. He will try to bring it up on the phone to our daughter, but she knows its a no go

Yes that is very good indeed.

 

[B5150]

I'd like to think we wouldn't have kids if we hated eachother

I hope I was not coming of as judgmental or holier than thow.

I am a product of parents sticking it out for the sake of the kids. For the sake of the kids they should have divorced. The religious denomination of my childhood home was dysfunctional non-practicing Catholic.

What you live, you learn.
What you learn, you practice.
What you practice, you become.

I am 43 in two days. I have a 20yo daughter and 18yo son and a 6yo daughter, a current wife of 12 years and an ex-wife (mother of the two oldest).

You would not believe how many behaviors I am having to relearn. I had know idea where I learned them from until I became a parent and watched my kids "learn what they live".

 

[DmitryWI]

I hope I was not coming of as judgmental or holier than thow.

I am a product of parents sticking it out for the sake of the kids. For the sake of the kids they should have divorced. The religious denomination of my childhood home was dysfunctional non-practicing Catholic.

What you live, you learn.
What you learn, you practice.
What you practice, you become.

I am 43 in two days. I have a 20yo daughter and 18yo son and a 6yo daughter, a current wife of 12 years and an ex-wife (mother of the two oldest).

You would not believe how many behaviors I am having to relearn. I had know idea where I learned them from until I became a parent and watched my kids "learn what they live".

I'm so glad my parents finally got divorced after few years of constant fighting with each other, I was 15 years old at the time and my little sister 12. Over the years I've learned how to love them not as my parents but as individuals, my mom and my dad and then I could see how much happier everyone became after few years of "hell", living together "just for the kids".

 

[crader]

My parents were another who stayed together for the kids, it did alot of damage, especially to my sister.

I divorced so i could show my kids a better life and two parents who were happier and not fighting all the time, they are young and don't understand it now, but they will later as they get older.

 

[Maverick60]

If I can go back a page or two without bringing the mess with me, I must say that my next wife better be just like Sqeaks!

I dont want a wife that is going to be controlling and possessive. Most of the girls Ive dated lately get upset if I even talk to another girl at a bar. Thats the most unattractive trait ever.

But if we are onto finances now, well thats part of what caused my divorce. lol. I was overseas and she spent all of our money while not paying for anything that was in my name for a year. She even moved in with her parents to be able to blow the money she wasnt spending on rent anymore. So I will not be letting the next wife (if) control my money from here on out, thank you very much.

 

[AE14]

Yes that is very good indeed.

it is, better late than never, it is still shocking to her, but it is beneficial for her now

 

[Usf97j4x4]

I hope I was not coming of as judgmental or holier than thow.

I am a product of parents sticking it out for the sake of the kids. For the sake of the kids they should have divorced. The religious denomination of my childhood home was dysfunctional non-practicing Catholic.

What you live, you learn.
What you learn, you practice.
What you practice, you become.

I am 43 in two days. I have a 20yo daughter and 18yo son and a 6yo daughter, a current wife of 12 years and an ex-wife (mother of the two oldest).

You would not believe how many behaviors I am having to relearn. I had know idea where I learned them from until I became a parent and watched my kids "learn what they live".

Not at all, no offense taken here. I'm not here to preach either - I just want to raise my kids in a strong catholic household and it is my belief that to do it right it would require us staying together and trying to work things out. I've heard stories from both sides on this and I guess my faith tugs me in this direction.

Luckily I do love my wife and we really get along great now that we've got the first year of marriage out of the way and things have been settled (finally). You know I thought it would be a breeze as we lived together 2 years before we actually tied the know but I can truly say it is a wholeeee nother' world.

 

[Usf97j4x4]

If I can go back a page or two without bringing the mess with me, I must say that my next wife better be just like Sqeaks!

I dont want a wife that is going to be controlling and possessive. Most of the girls Ive dated lately get upset if I even talk to another girl at a bar. Thats the most unattractive trait ever.

But if we are onto finances now, well thats part of what caused my divorce. lol. I was overseas and she spent all of our money while not paying for anything that was in my name for a year. She even moved in with her parents to be able to blow the money she wasnt spending on rent anymore. So I will not be letting the next wife (if) control my money from here on out, thank you very much.

That's horrible - you're supposed to be able to trust your wife. God, you leave and she goes wild.. that is too bad. Hopefully you find someone with their head screwed on straight. Don't let it bum you on the whole institution of marriage though.

My wife is definitely not controlling or possessive... hell if we go out she'll might tell me to go hit on a girl so she can sit back and get a kick out of it. lol

 

[Palo Alto Labs]

"I asked your father for a divorce"

the 7 sweetest words that I had ever heard... at the time i was about 15, I hated my father, and you could cut the tension in the house with a knife. Mom and dad didnt sleep in the same room..and when they did talk.. it was arguing. We were all miserable. They tried counseling at our catholic church, they tried everything.. but my mom is a difficult person to live with and dad was going through a major transition in his life that conflicted the rest of the family (he went from an average 'church on sundays' catholic to a little extremist, going to church almost 24/7... nothing against church... but it gets bad when you put church before your kids to the point where you neglect them and preach how we are all going to hell... not what a 15 year old needs to hear.)

I am happy to say that I now have an amazing relationship with my dad... it is something that would have never happened if we all stayed in the same house. It took a few years, but now I goto dads every sunday night for dinner... i look forward to it every week.

i think divorce is the last option... my parents were married for almost 20 years.. but both people changed into people that conflicted the other. I look at both of them now and know that it was the right decision

 

[Usf97j4x4]

"I asked your father for a divorce"

the 7 sweetest words that I had ever heard... at the time i was about 15, I hated my father, and you could cut the tension in the house with a knife. Mom and dad didnt sleep in the same room..and when they did talk.. it was arguing. We were all miserable. They tried counseling at our catholic church, they tried everything.. but my mom is a difficult person to live with and dad was going through a major transition in his life that conflicted the rest of the family (he went from an average 'church on sundays' catholic to a little extremist, going to church almost 24/7... nothing against church... but it gets bad when you put church before your kids to the point where you neglect them and preach how we are all going to hell... not what a 15 year old needs to hear.)

I am happy to say that I now have an amazing relationship with my dad... it is something that would have never happened if we all stayed in the same house. It took a few years, but now I goto dads every sunday night for dinner... i look forward to it every week.

i think divorce is the last option... my parents were married for almost 20 years.. but both people changed into people that conflicted the other. I look at both of them now and know that it was the right decision

Wow, glad it all worked out for the best!

 

[Squeaks4ver]

If I can go back a page or two without bringing the mess with me, I must say that my next wife better be just like Sqeaks!

.

YAY! I have a friend in this fight lol. Thank you for the kind words. Most people have a different view on things then my husband and I. We are both 100% in love and in trust with each other... we enjoy each other in all aspects of our union. It is a wonderful feeling knowing that you dont have to act or stifle everything or anything that you are in hopes to not be judged in a negative light. I never had that before and it is grand!

As for some of the comments made.. Yes I like attention. I have never once said anything otherwise. The only time I do not really like attention is when I am at the gym or running outside. Thats ME time. But I enjoy myself, I enjoy my body, it takes hours and hours of dedication to get to how I feel I look best and if others enjoy looking at it as well.. thats great. Sure my clothing may or may not cover as much as the next person. But I view my body as a car of sorts, something to move me around and help me feel, enjoy and learn things in this aspect of life. I use clothing or lack of clothing to "pimp my ride" when the time is right to do so. We all "sex" something up in our lives to maybe turn a head or get a second look. But it doesn't mean everyone gets a ride!

 

[Trauma1]

YAY! I have a friend in this fight lol. Thank you for the kind words. Most people have a different view on things then my husband and I. We are both 100% in love and in trust with each other... we enjoy each other in all aspects of our union. It is a wonderful feeling knowing that you dont have to act or stifle everything or anything that you are in hopes to not be judged in a negative light. I never had that before and it is grand!

As for some of the comments made.. Yes I like attention. I have never once said anything otherwise. The only time I do not really like attention is when I am at the gym or running outside. Thats ME time. But I enjoy myself, I enjoy my body, it takes hours and hours of dedication to get to how I feel I look best and if others enjoy looking at it as well.. thats great. Sure my clothing may or may not cover as much as the next person. But I view my body as a car of sorts, something to move me around and help me feel, enjoy and learn things in this aspect of life. I use clothing or lack of clothing to "pimp my ride" when the time is right to do so. We all "sex" something up in our lives to maybe turn a head or get a second look. But it doesn't mean everyone gets a ride!

I appreciate you contributions to the thread squeaks and respect your stance.

 

[Maverick60]

YAY! I have a friend in this fight lol. Thank you for the kind words. Most people have a different view on things then my husband and I. We are both 100% in love and in trust with each other... we enjoy each other in all aspects of our union. It is a wonderful feeling knowing that you dont have to act or stifle everything or anything that you are in hopes to not be judged in a negative light. I never had that before and it is grand!

Exactly, thats what Im talking about. If you can trust the other person to be completely honest with you, and to care about you enough to not do something that would cross a line that would hurt you, you can have a lot more fun and enjoy the relationship more. Insecurities and jealousy will kill a relationship, and when it doesnt kill the relationship it will most likely bring it down in a number of ways where both parties arent truly happy.

I really think that people are generally to controlling in relationships. Instead of finding someone that they actually care about and are actually compatible with to the point of being life long partners, people will find someone they like certain things about and try to make them conform to everything else they desire of a partner. I think its great that you can find someone that fits you so well Sqeaks.

 

[bpmartyr]

Women pick a man hoping to change him.
Men pick a women hoping she will never change.