KLEEN - STRONG BODY STRONG MIND!
- Thread starter MrKleen73
- Start date
MrKleen73
Legend
Thanks!
Merry Christmas to you and everyone else on here as well!!!!
Had a good one this year. Jo and I kept things minimal for each other and focused on Trinity for gifts, she is the only "child" aged kid we have left. I hit the big time getting tickets for the Katy Perry concert, she actually cried when she saw them. LOL Should be a fun show. She is definitely nice to look at.
Will be hitting up the gym tonight get in some nice work, and plan to hit the gym the rest of the week. I sure had fun with foods yesterday, I don't even want to think about how many calories I may have taken in. I am not quite done either. We have a pecan pie at the house that was bought just for me and I have only had one piece so far... So that bad boy is going down.
I have the rest of the week off but didn't realize that the 26th wasn't one of our work Holidays. So I had to come in today but will be off the rest of the week. Looking forward to that. I am pretty massive right now, just a giant mass of bloated fury! LMAO. Amazing what a ton of carbs and salt does to a physique. My face is a bit puffy, but on a positive note, I am expecting some ridiculous pumps the rest of the week. After that I will start to employ some caloric and carb cycling to get this recomp moving.
I made a 13lb prime rib roast for Christmas dinner and it came out perfectly! Everyone loved it and the ham that my Step Mother brought over was ignored. LOL So good!!!!!
booneman77
Legend
Thanks!
Merry Christmas to you and everyone else on here as well!!!!
Had a good one this year. Jo and I kept things minimal for each other and focused on Trinity for gifts, she is the only "child" aged kid we have left. I hit the big time getting tickets for the Katy Perry concert, she actually cried when she saw them. LOL Should be a fun show. She is definitely nice to look at.
Will be hitting up the gym tonight get in some nice work, and plan to hit the gym the rest of the week. I sure had fun with foods yesterday, I don't even want to think about how many calories I may have taken in. I am not quite done either. We have a pecan pie at the house that was bought just for me and I have only had one piece so far... So that bad boy is going down.
I have the rest of the week off but didn't realize that the 26th wasn't one of our work Holidays. So I had to come in today but will be off the rest of the week. Looking forward to that. I am pretty massive right now, just a giant mass of bloated fury! LMAO. Amazing what a ton of carbs and salt does to a physique. My face is a bit puffy, but on a positive note, I am expecting some ridiculous pumps the rest of the week. After that I will start to employ some caloric and carb cycling to get this recomp moving.
I made a 13lb prime rib roast for Christmas dinner and it came out perfectly! Everyone loved it and the ham that my Step Mother brought over was ignored. LOL So good!!!!!
We did a prime rib roast as well at my dads and it was amazing. Perfectly rare too
love2liftkat
Board Sponsor
Yumm! We had prime rib at home last week! We weren’t quite as nice as you (to share with family though lol) Love that Trinity was so shocked by her tickets!! That’s awesome!!! Surprising the kids is so much fun!
MrKleen73
Legend
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!
About to head to the gym for the first workout of the year. Going back to a little bit of the program I had hit up on last year but with a bit lower volume on the heavier stuff. See how well this elbow of mine holds up to that. It has just been bitching a lot lately. I know that it is something I can work with or around but would like to stat seeing some recovery. I have been bad about icing it so that is on me too!
I may end up hopping on some peptides to help out with that part of things.
Either way with how I adjusted things on these 2 days I have less sets and exercises to hit so I can add a little conditioning or GPP in. Today is a Push focused load day. I had 2 exercises for legs and chest but removed the accessory lifts to limit volume. If I feel I need more I can always add a back off set or two on the main lifts. I will post back up later to report how things went.
I have a penchant for wanting to do as much as possible and train how I used to but realize I need to back off on that mentality to account for my overuse injuries I have developed over the years. So hopefully removing some of that will help me hone in on my ideal volume and intensity for the more frequent training sessions.
Got called away here is today's post...
Well not only did I not submit this yesterday, I also wasn't able to squat. I am heading up there soon to get that done. I was shocked to see that every single squat rack was in use for the entire time I was at the gym. I ended up doing my bench first to pass the time since it was scheduled. Yhen did some shoulders hoping a place to squat would open up. Once that was done I just turned it into a push workout.
Incline BB Bench 45x15, 95x12, 135x5, 155x5, 185x5, 225x5, 235x5, 245x3, 225x9
Shoulder Press Hoist RocIt Machine - 90x12, 140x8, 190x6, 240x3
OH Triceps Ext. 40lbs x 20, 4 sets while waiting for dip machine....
Gave up and went to real dips for pump work
Dips 35, 25, 14
Impact Lateral Raise Machine Blood Flow work 20kg worked to total failure then rested 15 seconds and did another round
Oh yeah, like I mentioned before I had eaten quite a bit over the last 2 weeks. I woke up yesterday a whopping 223.6!!!! The good news is that I don;t look anywhere near as sloppy as I would expect. Definitely a little bit softer and my waist is thicker but A LOT of the size is in my muscle. All pant legs and shirt sleeves are noticeably fuller, my shirts all hug my shoulders and I look like I am a foot thick from my chest to my back.
Tomorrow all the reigns get tightened back in on calories and we see what kind of size came with that influx of calories over the next couple of weeks of cleaning things back up. I think the water and carb bloat will be gone over the course of the week, and any fat gained will be minimal.
I just ate about 20 minutes ago and once it is digested enough I will hit the gym and get some squatting in!
About to head to the gym for the first workout of the year. Going back to a little bit of the program I had hit up on last year but with a bit lower volume on the heavier stuff. See how well this elbow of mine holds up to that. It has just been bitching a lot lately. I know that it is something I can work with or around but would like to stat seeing some recovery. I have been bad about icing it so that is on me too!
I may end up hopping on some peptides to help out with that part of things.
Either way with how I adjusted things on these 2 days I have less sets and exercises to hit so I can add a little conditioning or GPP in. Today is a Push focused load day. I had 2 exercises for legs and chest but removed the accessory lifts to limit volume. If I feel I need more I can always add a back off set or two on the main lifts. I will post back up later to report how things went.
I have a penchant for wanting to do as much as possible and train how I used to but realize I need to back off on that mentality to account for my overuse injuries I have developed over the years. So hopefully removing some of that will help me hone in on my ideal volume and intensity for the more frequent training sessions.
Got called away here is today's post...
Well not only did I not submit this yesterday, I also wasn't able to squat. I am heading up there soon to get that done. I was shocked to see that every single squat rack was in use for the entire time I was at the gym. I ended up doing my bench first to pass the time since it was scheduled. Yhen did some shoulders hoping a place to squat would open up. Once that was done I just turned it into a push workout.
Incline BB Bench 45x15, 95x12, 135x5, 155x5, 185x5, 225x5, 235x5, 245x3, 225x9
Shoulder Press Hoist RocIt Machine - 90x12, 140x8, 190x6, 240x3
OH Triceps Ext. 40lbs x 20, 4 sets while waiting for dip machine....
Gave up and went to real dips for pump work
Dips 35, 25, 14
Impact Lateral Raise Machine Blood Flow work 20kg worked to total failure then rested 15 seconds and did another round
Oh yeah, like I mentioned before I had eaten quite a bit over the last 2 weeks. I woke up yesterday a whopping 223.6!!!! The good news is that I don;t look anywhere near as sloppy as I would expect. Definitely a little bit softer and my waist is thicker but A LOT of the size is in my muscle. All pant legs and shirt sleeves are noticeably fuller, my shirts all hug my shoulders and I look like I am a foot thick from my chest to my back.
Tomorrow all the reigns get tightened back in on calories and we see what kind of size came with that influx of calories over the next couple of weeks of cleaning things back up. I think the water and carb bloat will be gone over the course of the week, and any fat gained will be minimal.
I just ate about 20 minutes ago and once it is digested enough I will hit the gym and get some squatting in!
kenpoengineer
Well-known member
Happy 2018 Lifting!
MrKleen73
Legend
Squatting was good and uneventful. I was feeling a bit off so I stopped warming up at 275 and did 10 sets of 3 @275. It felt good, nice work without any fan fair Just got in some volume and pattern work. Lower back / Hips held up nicely, should be able to start pushing a bit more weight soon.
Carbs will be going back to right around training and not anywhere else for a little while. Time to clean things up a bit and see what all sticks...
Carbs will be going back to right around training and not anywhere else for a little while. Time to clean things up a bit and see what all sticks...
MrKleen73
Legend
Last night I decided to do some bodyweight Bulgarian Squats and boy did I find out I have major imbalance there. My gluteus medial and minimus are not firing well at all on my right leg. I could feel my GM twinging and straining while doing the BGS on the right leg. Stability was horrible too. I am going to see what I can do to address this. I think I am going to need to work on abduction on that side as well as loosening up the adductors on that side to allow the GM to contract with more force.
This is something I can work on while also still working legs but it was very eye opening doing them yesterday. It is something I need to get a handle on before it causes an injury or a permanent imbalance.
This is something I can work on while also still working legs but it was very eye opening doing them yesterday. It is something I need to get a handle on before it causes an injury or a permanent imbalance.
MrKleen73
Legend
Yeah, this has me a little concerned. I am going to do what I can for now regarding home remedy techniques. However, I think I need to maybe see a movement specialist as well to see what they think and suggest to improve it long term. There has been somewhat of an imbalance for years but with this last tweak of the back / hips something shifted or something making it worse. Now to figure out if insurance will cover it too. I need someone in network, that stuff is expensive. I think all of this stems from a severe psoas and hip flexor sprain I had about 7 years ago. I feel the psoas is probably just so tight that it pulls the glutes into a stretch initiating autogenic inhibition. So that is going to be my first point of attack while also using some activation methods for the glute med and min.
Tonight is going to be a pull night, depending on how cold it is I may opt to stay at the house and do some Deads, Chin ups and bloodflow work for arms and rear delts. Otherwise I will end up going to the gym later tonight maybe around 9 when things start to die down a bit.
MrKleen73
Legend
Hit up dead lifts and chins then blood flow work on rear and medial delta as well as triceps.
I worked up to a triple at 495 on dead’s. Video below.
[video]https://youtu.be/yb3xYXIiZGQ[/video]
7 sets of 5 on chins then assisted for a burnout set.
Rear delts 25kg 90 seconds nonstop then 30 seconds rest and 30 more seconds of constant work. Went down to partials and pulses just to keep tension and blood flow.
Same with medial delts and DB overhead triceps extensions.
Got asked if I was going to compete so I know I am looking big as hell!
I worked up to a triple at 495 on dead’s. Video below.
[video]https://youtu.be/yb3xYXIiZGQ[/video]
7 sets of 5 on chins then assisted for a burnout set.
Rear delts 25kg 90 seconds nonstop then 30 seconds rest and 30 more seconds of constant work. Went down to partials and pulses just to keep tension and blood flow.
Same with medial delts and DB overhead triceps extensions.
Got asked if I was going to compete so I know I am looking big as hell!
MrKleen73
Legend
Hit up a Bro type pump workout yesterday for chest, arms, and shoulders. I really just pumped the crap out of the push muscles in kind of a circuit then hit bi's and yolk for the win!
I started out very light and really focused on the contractions at first then worked up to about 2 away from failure between 15-20 and hovered in that area changing weights to remain in that rep range for about 6 rounds until finally pushing the last set to failure all the way into pulses.
Pump Time - 6 rounds increasing intensity, 2-3 shy of failure on 1st 4 rounds, RPE 9 on 5th and Failure down into pulses on 6th
Machine Bench from deep stretch - Starting Rep range 15-20 worked up to an RPE9 @ 15 then did partials and pulses to failure
French Curl Bar High Incline Squeeze Press - 35lbs x RPE8 reps from in the 50's down to 8
Rope Triceps Extension - 2-3 shy of failure on 1st 4 rounds, RPE 9 on 5th and Failure down into pulses on 6th
Barbell Curls 50lbs x 42, 33, 27, 19, 12 all done to RPE 8-9 and failure on last set 30 seconds rest
Karwoski Rows - increasing intensity, reps done to an RPE 8-9 then failure on final sets.
135x in twenties x 2, 185x17, & 15, 135x18, 135x12 + partials = now these will work the heck out of your traps, medial, & rear delts like a mofo!!!! I just tried them today and loved them!!!!
Also took Trinity to see Katy Perry last night. She loved it, but I am dead tired now after getting too sleep around 1:00AM. Lucky her she is still off school for the holidays. Tomorrow is her rude awakening!
Doing the high incline squeeze press with the French Curl bar added a whole knew dimension to the squeeze press for me. I was able to get a better pectoral squeeze with it. The contraction was intense especially for the clavicular area of the pecs which is very hard to work due to the different innervation a lot of people never really hit is well.
Oh yeah, weight is on the way back down now. I am still not where I need to be and holding a little extra from the Christmas week off but I am down 5lbs to 217. We shall see where I am this Saturday after I have had a week of being more disciplined. Last week was a mixed bag of tricks and too many things to finish off. This week is going to be more disciplined so I am expecting more change.
I may take my weight down even more we shall see what I need to get down to. I have decided to go for the look I want, and will start adding in more energy work to burn off some fat and increase general health. Once I get my abs showing again I will reassess what I need to do with my physique to compete, or decide if I am going to push myself and my family through it after the year we just had with caring for her mother. I might decide not to stress the biosphere with competition prep while it is recovering from having her mother there. It has not been an easy thing to deal with.
People with dementia symptoms are so hard and challenging the toll it has had on me and my family has been staggering. We have a lot of emotional damage that has resulted from some of her behavior toward my wife and daughter too. She is supposed to be picked up this week but the guy seems to be putting off actually buying the tickets for some reason. I think he is not internet savvy enough to do it and will end up going to the airport to buy them... I hope that is the reason and not 2nd thoughts. I know that sounds horrible but this has been a very trying period and now that we are so close to the finish line this hemming and hawing over when he is actually coming is creating a fear he is going to back out. He knows how to care for her and well he is a man. For what ever reason Jan does not seem to like other females very much. So JoAnn an Trinity have had their feelings hurt quite a bit. She adores me and my son's but treats them like they are 2nd handed citizens.
Anyway, sorry not trying to dump on you guys but sometimes you just have to release a little pressure, just a little stressed with this guy and his "soft arrival date" feeling like a total lack of commitment to pick her up which is a fear of ours...
I started out very light and really focused on the contractions at first then worked up to about 2 away from failure between 15-20 and hovered in that area changing weights to remain in that rep range for about 6 rounds until finally pushing the last set to failure all the way into pulses.
Pump Time - 6 rounds increasing intensity, 2-3 shy of failure on 1st 4 rounds, RPE 9 on 5th and Failure down into pulses on 6th
Machine Bench from deep stretch - Starting Rep range 15-20 worked up to an RPE9 @ 15 then did partials and pulses to failure
French Curl Bar High Incline Squeeze Press - 35lbs x RPE8 reps from in the 50's down to 8
Rope Triceps Extension - 2-3 shy of failure on 1st 4 rounds, RPE 9 on 5th and Failure down into pulses on 6th
Barbell Curls 50lbs x 42, 33, 27, 19, 12 all done to RPE 8-9 and failure on last set 30 seconds rest
Karwoski Rows - increasing intensity, reps done to an RPE 8-9 then failure on final sets.
135x in twenties x 2, 185x17, & 15, 135x18, 135x12 + partials = now these will work the heck out of your traps, medial, & rear delts like a mofo!!!! I just tried them today and loved them!!!!
Also took Trinity to see Katy Perry last night. She loved it, but I am dead tired now after getting too sleep around 1:00AM. Lucky her she is still off school for the holidays. Tomorrow is her rude awakening!
Doing the high incline squeeze press with the French Curl bar added a whole knew dimension to the squeeze press for me. I was able to get a better pectoral squeeze with it. The contraction was intense especially for the clavicular area of the pecs which is very hard to work due to the different innervation a lot of people never really hit is well.
Oh yeah, weight is on the way back down now. I am still not where I need to be and holding a little extra from the Christmas week off but I am down 5lbs to 217. We shall see where I am this Saturday after I have had a week of being more disciplined. Last week was a mixed bag of tricks and too many things to finish off. This week is going to be more disciplined so I am expecting more change.
I may take my weight down even more we shall see what I need to get down to. I have decided to go for the look I want, and will start adding in more energy work to burn off some fat and increase general health. Once I get my abs showing again I will reassess what I need to do with my physique to compete, or decide if I am going to push myself and my family through it after the year we just had with caring for her mother. I might decide not to stress the biosphere with competition prep while it is recovering from having her mother there. It has not been an easy thing to deal with.
People with dementia symptoms are so hard and challenging the toll it has had on me and my family has been staggering. We have a lot of emotional damage that has resulted from some of her behavior toward my wife and daughter too. She is supposed to be picked up this week but the guy seems to be putting off actually buying the tickets for some reason. I think he is not internet savvy enough to do it and will end up going to the airport to buy them... I hope that is the reason and not 2nd thoughts. I know that sounds horrible but this has been a very trying period and now that we are so close to the finish line this hemming and hawing over when he is actually coming is creating a fear he is going to back out. He knows how to care for her and well he is a man. For what ever reason Jan does not seem to like other females very much. So JoAnn an Trinity have had their feelings hurt quite a bit. She adores me and my son's but treats them like they are 2nd handed citizens.
Anyway, sorry not trying to dump on you guys but sometimes you just have to release a little pressure, just a little stressed with this guy and his "soft arrival date" feeling like a total lack of commitment to pick her up which is a fear of ours...
stacy1212
Well-known member
Dementia ... hardest thing is watching someone you love and care about completely changing with no remembrance of who one is or their loved ones. My Grandma .... raised all of us kids plus anyone else that needed her... loved kids 100%. Now she's meaner than a rattlesnake. It is hard in both aspects ... I feel for you and your family.
jswain34
Well-known member
If you end up seeing that movement specialist id love to hear what they tell you. I have that same issue with my glute medius and have honestly been wanting to see a movement specialist for years, ive just been too lazy and stubborn (and cheap) to work on the process of doing it. Its hard to be objective on yourself, and honestly, its what they specialize in so id hope they would know more about it than i would anyhow.
MrKleen73
Legend
Luckily hers is not quite that severe yet, and may not get that way, it is related to her MS which typically doesn't represent like that but you never know depending on where the lesions happen in the brain.
Absolutely will. I am not even sure how to go about it through my insurance the website doesn't get down to that type of detail in the menu options. Has been something I have been thinking about too and just not made happen. Now it is a little more in the forefront because it felt WAY off when I did the bulgarian split squats.
DemntedCowboy
Well-known member
What type of MS, my wife has Aggressive Remissive....she hasnt had a flair up in years thanks to her pills. When she was on the shot she was put in the hospital a couple of times
love2liftkat
Board Sponsor
Can’t even imagine what you are going through but I do know it’s very impressive how you have continued to push yourself and your goals! Although you may not feel it all the time, you are doing amazing!
As for the movement specialist, I think that’s a great idea! I feel a good bit of my hip issues derive from imbalances.
As for the movement specialist, I think that’s a great idea! I feel a good bit of my hip issues derive from imbalances.
MrKleen73
Legend
She has remissive but for some reason they have not put her on medication. Due to her shakes and tremors they think she may also have Parkinsons and they didn't want to giver her the MS meds until they verify if she has Parkinson's also. It really doesn't make sense to us as she has been diagnosed with MS for over 20 years via Spinal Tap and MRI... but we got shuffled around twice while she was here trying to get her back into another specialist because her neurologist was dumbfounded and wanted a 2nd opinion. We had to wait 6 months to get into the 2nd one to find out they put in the referral wrong so they sent us away at the door since we didn't want to pay 500 cash to be seen.
Now she is going home so not sure if her boyfriend will continue to pursue things or not. We had another appointment scheduled for February but she is leaving so we cancelled it. She doesn't want to be here any more and doesn't actually see the value in being able to walk and do things because she is expected to do as much for herself as possible so she doesn't lose the ability. She wants to be taken care of 100% of the time which is what she got accustomed to before with him. Also why she had an S sore on her foot all the way to the bone when we picked her up. So bad at one point they mentioned amputation as a possibility. Since they agreed for her to go home she cancelled all of her therapy sessions almost 2 months ago and her ability to walk and do things has progressively gotten worse as she refuses to do any of her exercise or anything anymore.
I think it may be a bit of whatever that "patient syndrome" is where people who are sick prefer to stay sick to receive the extra attention. Once she came home from the Nursing home after getting used to having everything done for her again she has wanted our home to be the same way. At the instruction of the therapists, we try to have her do as much as she can for herself so she doesn't lose the ability. Especially now that she has refused doing any of her therapy work. So she doesn't like that and has said it is part of why she wants to go home to her Ex now that she is in a place he can take care of her again.
JoAnn and I are trying to take the attitude of "Okay, maybe our job wasn't to care for her for the rest of her life like we thought. Maybe it was just to nurse her back to health so she could go back to her old life she was happy with." Apparently they thought she would never recover from this last fall. Now that she has they want to be together so that is what needs to happen if it makes her happy. Just worried her health is going to decline. Hopefully he has learned a few things from us regarding having to ger her up regularly and what not so she at least doesn't get another 'bed sore" on her foot.
Thanks! You are right I don't feel that way most of the time. More like a struggle to keep my head above water. As for the movement specialist, yeah definitely, and although I am not that worried about what this imbalance means for me right now, it will likely mean a hip replacement later if I don't get it corrected now.
Yesterday was an off day, just took Trinity to the gym for a Hip Hop Cardio class. Chest and clavicular pec area is a bit sore from the pump work the other day. Triceps are fine now but felt them yesterday, and my biceps definitely have some DOMS. Tonight I have a lower body workout using muscle rounds planned.
Most likely Leg Press = MR, Leg Extensions = MR, Leg Curls = MR, Abductor Machine = MR, Calves=MR, Reverse Curls = PUMP, and Biceps Curls=MR or a Pump (5 Into the hole set) tonight.
kenpoengineer
Well-known member
Makes me sad about your MIL but also makes me mad as freaking hell as well! What’s in it for the “boyfriend”? Social security check?
You and your family are the best for at least trying to take care of her and teach her to do the same. I sure hope your wife realizes that this is her Mom’s end of days.
You and your family are the best for at least trying to take care of her and teach her to do the same. I sure hope your wife realizes that this is her Mom’s end of days.
MrKleen73
Legend
You know, we are both kind of in that thought process too regarding him. Do you just need her money so you can have your old lifestyle back? Is this about money, or did you really miss her that bad, and truly want her back.
It is really hard to say which is true. When we first picked her up we were very righteous in our views of him. Those who have not been through an experience find it easier to pass judgement on those who have, and that is what we were doing. The reality of it was that after her fall he could not have taken care of her by himself. He is also kind of feeble minded when it comes to a lot of things. I am not saying he has a mental disability, just that he is not overly intelligent and also seems to hate technology so a lot of what was available to them he had no ideas about. So we were of the mentality that things got a little hard and he got rid of her.
Once she was living with us it became apparent that he would not have been able to care for her in her debilitated state. Honestly once we had her here we realized maybe we bit off more than we could chew.
After living with her for a while it became apparent that he literally did EVERYTHING FOR HER! I think things got to the point that it was easier for him to dote over her and do everything for her than to have the patience required to have her do it herself so that she doesn't lose the ability. It is one of the things we have really stressed to him since he is coming to get her. That he needs to have her doing some of her own stuff, and have her go out for walks in the evening. Hopefully he will.
Either way though, we don't know if he just loves and misses her and wants her home now that she is in a place he can care for her. OR he can't pay his bills and wants her back to bring the money back into the house. I really don't know but she wants to be with him, and he wants to have her there.
We made it abundantly clear that if she chose to leave the house to go back that she would not be able to move back in with us. This has been very unhealthy for JoAnn with stress being such a major factor with her illness she has just gotten progressively thinner, weaker and more tired from all of the digestive problems the stress of this has caused. So we explained to her mother, and her boyfriend that under no circumstances could she return to our home if they decided she needed to move out again. She was welcome to stay but JoAnn can't go through all of this again. I am already worried about what the separation from her mother is going to do to her stress levels.
Yes we are aware that her mother will probably be cutting her life short by 5 years or more by going home. Giving up and preferring to just sit and what TV at all times can only lead to that. She basically has given up and just wants to be comfortable and entertained until she passes. If that is her decision that is okay for her to do out there. However it was never going to be accepted at my home because it would teach my children that giving up and waiting for death is acceptable.
kenpoengineer
Well-known member
You are a SAINT brother! Prayers for you and MIL.
HIT4ME
Well-known member
I too am sorry to hear about all the trials here. One thing I will say - if you want to compete, don't let this keep you down. Win or lose, stressful or not, going through this and pushing forward anyway (if handled correctly) should help you all get through and find the light at the end of the tunnel. And I have no doubt you can do it and do it "correctly".
Beyond the dementia, I see a lot of parallel's with my grandmother and her health. She does not have dementia really, but has poor physical health. Basically she is lazy, avoids all pain at all costs, etc. and will not go through the smallest discomforts. She lost her ability to stand from a chair on her own 5 years ago or so, can't walk without much effort and assistance, etc. This is my grandmother and anyone who knows me and her knows that we love each other immensely, but I also see that she has done A LOT of this to herself. It is one of my biggest motivations for taking control of my own health. She refuses to do any work to get better. She says she wants to walk again, but does not want to put in any effort. And a lot of this is obviously because so many doctors have told her and my mom/aunt it is hopeless and she believes it, so why try? But they don't tell her this isn't "normal" and that there are people her age doing just fine. It's amazing to me how people, human nature, can become so accustomed to something and not realize the pain they are causing themselves. Like walking on a regular basis to stay in shape was more painful than letting joints and bones deteriorate and becoming unable to get out of a chair and go to the bathroom on your own. I know this sounds heartless - but it's human nature. It's not about what is actually painful, it's about what we THINK of the pain.
And I can see what you mean about biting off more than you can chew. Caring for someone who can't even take care of themselves is near impossible.
As far as the boyfriend - I think human nature is at play here too. There is a quirk in human nature where if I help you with something, you would think that YOU would like ME better because I helped you. But the studies actually show that scenario will make ME like YOU better because I helped you. It's backwards. I think it has to do with the function of serotonin and feeling like part of a community and being helpful. We are wired for it. And maybe that's what is going on with the BF. He's used to the pain of taking care of her, and it made him feel like part of something and useful - and when it was gone he probably did miss that a little. It isn't necessarily love and may have some selfishness in it, but it's not directly selfish either. And, maybe it will be good for them to be together and he will hopefully take good care of her.
As far as the stress/digestion problems - I have been playing with Glycine lately. You may want to look at it. It's has a neurological inhibitory effect like GABA and is certainly helpful for sleep in my experience but it has also been shown to have a strong positive effect on gut health and may help with ulcers and leaky gut. I've been taking 14 grams before bed (I read a study where it increased GH strongly at this dose) with 2 g of GABA and ZMA and my sleep has been great...it's simple and effective. I'd put it up there with Phenibut but less hangover. And on days when I get less sleep than normal, I seem to function better, as if the sleep I'm getting is higher quality. Overall, it may help gut health, sleep and anxiety - probably worth a shot. I got a KG for $14 so it's cheap - and sweet enough you can mix it with water and down it no problem.
MrKleen73
Legend
Thanks Mark, I have gone through the entire gamut of emotions with her being at the house. I dealt with so many challenges I had never experienced before. I have never had my patience tested so much, and unfortunately did not always pass... I definitely did not feel like a Saint at those times. Good thing is if I mention any of those instances and say I am not proud of how I handled myself there, she looks at me like I am crazy and tells me how good of a man and son in law I am... So I guess I am probably just being hard on myself over the times I got too frustrated.
To make it more confusing, she is in that state in between mental cohesiveness and dementia, and slides back and forth so it is often hard to tell what, or whom I am dealing with. Am I dealing with the sweet heart of an old lady that just wants to smile, the extremely confused woman who has no clue what its going on around her, or the manipulative / angry one that hurts my wife and daughter's feelings regularly.
I am not sure why but it is very obvious that Jan does not like other females. She treats my wife and daughter with disdain, often gets an attitude with them or completely ignores them if she doesn't feel like being bothered. Yet you let me or one of my sons come into the room and she will light up and be super sweet to us. All of that while still ignoring them, or treating them as an annoyance. Kind of odd but then again, my mother was the same way about boys as her mother is about girls...
MrKleen73
Legend
I totally agree on the causing their own demise on a lot of this. With Jan you simply can not reason with her, that part is gone. When you try to reason with her now you get the dead stare which means I am listening to the words but have no clue what you are talking to me about... She will listen but can not follow the conversation for very long. So her making a good decision is unlikely but forcing her to do exercises only creates a contentious situation. One where the ONLY thing she knows is that she does not want to be doing it and you are the jerk forcing the situation. For a while we took the lumps and forced her do the exercise because she did not protest heavily. However as the protests got heavier and especially once she found out she could go back to California it became an argument and was disrupting the entire family so we respected her decision rather than have a house in contention at all times. What is sad is in the time she started refusing to do stuff she has already relapsed into being less coordinated, having a much harder time walking with her cane, and getting tired very quickly. We mention this to her and tell her why and ask her to do some exercises but she still refuses. She just doesn't want to do anything that is not watching television to be honest.
I will have to look into that for Jo for sure. Thanks!
HIT4ME
Well-known member
Yes, this is something that is hard. And watching them relapse so quickly can be so hard. It's kind of devastating to watch and realize that they can't even perceived what they've lost.
I can't imagine having the full-blown symptoms of dementia to deal with and having someone who can go between being normal, to having cognitive issues, back to normal would be a difficult situation to say the least. Just imagining the situation, I FEEL like it would create PTSD.
One thing about my grandmother - my aunt and my mom and everyone around her are always very serious and I think this makes her more resilient against them. One thing I do with her all the time is try to be humorous and say something that nobody expects you to say to an old lady - especially in the presence of someone she is very serious with (even doctors). For instance, when she's was in a nursing home one time trying to walk down the hallway for rehab, she moves very slow and she would try to be serious with the trainer and I would wait a minute and then I would just say, "Nona, is this gonna take all day?"
Or if she needs something I will say, "Spit it out, I have **** to do!"
Other people may be shocked or think it's not very funny, but she gets so little of it that she cracks up and she will do things for me that no one else can get her to do.
The other thing I did was to get some rubber bands - she has a weak upper body and weak legs. She can't stand from a chair and needs upper arm strength to press up on the arms of the chair to get up - so I started having her do a bench-press motion with the rubber bands. Instead of making it hard, I started her off on something that was easy and did a 5X5 routine with just that one exercise 3X per week. After a couple weeks I moved up the bands for more tension. By the time it became difficult, she was used to the "routine" and it wasn't a big deal. But it's ALWAYS a struggle. I mean, even I struggle with working out sometimes...
kenpoengineer
Well-known member
Time to take care of and worry about your immediate family only. Compete and be proud of your accomplishments. You tried but did NOT FAIL your MIL. She is making a decision and there is nothing more you can do.
MrKleen73
Legend
Oh, I do this with her too. She loves off handed type of humor. I made her spit out her drink the other day by stepping out of the doorway with my shirt lifted up over my chest, and I pretended to lick my fingers and tweak my nipples. She just fell out laughing. I also jump out of the doors next to her seat acting like a spastic fool to startle her and make her laugh. She loves that. It scares the crap out of her but it makes her feel alive. This past weekend I snuck up good and jumped out right in front of her chair yelling ROAR with my hands up. I have to say hearing old ladies cuss it too funny. She was like "Oh F#CK!!!!" then there was a pause and a look of surprise at what she said. Then she pinched me while laughing and said... "You scared the **** out of me you turd!" We both just started laughing.
Yeah, I can see how this situation could create PTSD type of situation with people. I would definitely be gunshy of taking on a responsibility like this again. I imagine the anxiety of even having to think of it would cause me great discomfort. To be honest now that we have accepted she is leaving and have started looking forward to having some freedom and a bit of normalcy in our life again him dragging his feet about buying th tickets for the flight has us both very stressed and anxious. I think we both kind of have the fear that now that we have gotten used to the idea of getting our lives back he might change his mind. We are getting anxious considering he is supposed to be here between the 9th and the 14th but has not bought his ticket yet and today is the 9th... He said he has to be back at work on the 19th so he better hurry up if he wants to make it back in time. That is a heck of a drive for one man driving the whole way with a woman who has continence issues. I think it is a 22-24 hour drive from our house to where he lives now.
MrKleen73
Legend
Thanks Mark, means a lot brother! I told JoAnn the same thing. We did not fail her, we took her from not being able to pick her chin up off of her chest and or being able to walk to being able to walk without a cane. It wasn't until she chose not to do the work required to maintain it did she start to backslide.
If you look at a picture of Jan from April last year to now she looks like a completely different person. She is so much prettier, and healthier. She has lost 35lbs since she has been with us, she can walk, she can cook her own food (microwaved meals) and make her own beverages. Her medicine is managed by a time released pill lock box with an alarm on it so she can be left at the house on her own and still not miss her meds. She really got a lot of her independence back being here. Unfortunately she does not want it. She wants to be pampered and doted over and has lost the ability to see value in doing things for herself. I asked her the other day if she was happy about being able to do these things for herself and having some independence. She said "No, I like it better when you all do stuff for me." Well there you have it...
I do believe I am going to compete and plan to keep working toward it, but like I said if I start being a douche from the stress I am backing out of it because my family doesn't need that right now. We need recovery, so we shall see how things go. Prep won't start for quite a while so I have a long way to go to get there. Right now I am just going to work toward leaning up, growing biceps, medial delts and maybe a little more on my legs. All the things I need to get that ideal physique whether I compete or not.
HIT4ME
Well-known member
X2 to the power of 1,000,000.
You can only do what you can do. You gave her the help she needed when she needed it. Sounds like she made tremendous progress and, whether she admits it or not, she is much happier than she would have been if you weren't there.
hahaha - Those are the times to remember. I think when people get older, everyone becomes so serious around them and it's easy to forget they are just like everyone else and need some humor in their life, etc.
MrKleen73
Legend
Yeah, I am pretty sure once she goes home she is really going to miss having so much stimulation and people who love her all around her. She would get so excited to go see Trinity's performances and stuff like that. With Trinity's schedule it was about once a month and more during the fall! She was talking about how much she really loved going to these things at the Christmas Parade Trinity was in. When I asked if she realized she was going to be leaving all of this behind when she went home I could tell that it had not occurred to her what she would be leaving in order to go back home.
This was the first time she was ever "Grandma" to anyone that she was actually around to see and or get to know.
My only wish is that her and Trinity could have bonded but she said a few too many cold and callous things to Trinity during her time here and caused a bit of damage. Stuff like openly admitting she has never taken the time to watch any of the DVD's we sent her of Trinity's competitions or concerts. When Trinity got her feelings hurt and asked why not she just said "I didn't feel like it..."
Another time Trinity was trying to love on her and hold her hand and she jerked it away. Trinity said "Grandma I just want to hold your hand and love on you..." to which Jan responds in a very matter of fact manner. "I don't want to hold your hand." then put her hand in her lap so Trinity couldn't touch it.
Now we know a lot of that has a bit to do with the disease, but also a bit to do with Jan being Jan because this was how she treated JoAnn as well.
Just a lot of little things that made Trinity painfully aware that she was not one of her Grandmothers priorities. It is HARD not to resent someone who is causing your daughter emotional pain, whether it is intentional or not. Unfortunately I think that Trinity will probably be a little callous toward her in the future. Right now she is literally just waiting for her to go home.
Well today has turned into Tucker Therapy Session 101 hasn't it.
kenpoengineer
Well-known member
Keep talking brother. We all need to talk things out of us from time to time. Besides, it gives everyone a reason to keep pushing the weights and keeping healthy.
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HIT4ME
Well-known member
Yeah, keep talking man. I was thinking about what you were saying about your MIL saying she wasn't interested in watching your daughter's videos but she was very excited to see it when she was there in person. It then occurred to me that you said she had never been "grandma" to anyone who was present.
I am thinking it was all a big change for her too and she may have been sad about all she missed out on, and is afraid to enjoy it too much because, well, she doesn't know how and can't admit she regrets it now that she sees what she missed. We are funny like that and sometimes it is easier to act disinterested then to let your true feelings in...
Or maybe I am wrong...You know it all better.
Either way, keep talking all you need or even call me if you want. I don't know everything but I sure think I do so I have to believe I can help, hahaha.
Great great quote. So true.
MrKleen73
Legend
No doubt!
Thanks, and no unfortunately with Trinity and Jan it is just really an issue. She loves Trinity but she just has issues with girls and she treats them differently. They don't get any of her niceness, just kind of indifference. JoAnn said she was the same way when she was a kid. She adored Jeff, but rode Jo hard, and still acts that way today. She lights up for him, it is odd to see the difference in how she treats males and females... Like I said me, and my sons both get the "special" treatment from her, and the hugs and hand holds. She says something every time we walk through the room. Trinity and JoAnn can walk through the room, sit down and speak to her and never get acknowledged... or just get looked over at and then she looks back at the TV without responding to them. Stuff like that. For a 13 year old little girl who is dying to have her grandma to love her being treated like that repeatedly just broke her heart.
MrKleen73
Legend
WOOHOO!!!!
Sir DragsHisFeet has finally purchased his tickets and will be here tomorrow evening to pick Mom up and will be leaving out First thing Friday morning. We are both excited and in a way sad to see her go. Today she just realized she only had one more day and started balling to JoAnn that she was really going to miss her which really surprised JoAnn. Like I said affection towards JoAnn, and Trinity has never been something she shows much of. So this was a surprise.
The gym was a nightmare last night. I did 2 different warm ups and still nothing available to workout on... After being there 30 minutes all I had managed to do was 15 minutes of warm ups and 3 sets of 15 on the Push Press machine? Not sure what the name is but it is like a horizontal push press or squat thrust machine... The lines for the legs stuff were 2-3 deep and that was pairs of people. I was going to do some upper body instead but to be honest everything was taken. It was quite literally packed in there. I swear it was probably close to legal capacity if not over...
I love that they put a functional fitness section in there but that took up half of the old weight room so now the actual lifting equipment is just not enough with all the resolutioners. Hell it is barely enough with the normal crowd.
Anyway after 40 minutes at the gym and not a work set done I said screw it and went home. It was already getting kind of late so I didn't try to lift in the garage at that point.
I think tonight I am just going to go to the garage and hit up squats, extensions, probably some shelc's for hammies. I will have to figure something out for the adductors, and I have a calf raise platform at the house too. I just don't feel like messing with that crowd and would rather be outside in the cold...
Sir DragsHisFeet has finally purchased his tickets and will be here tomorrow evening to pick Mom up and will be leaving out First thing Friday morning. We are both excited and in a way sad to see her go. Today she just realized she only had one more day and started balling to JoAnn that she was really going to miss her which really surprised JoAnn. Like I said affection towards JoAnn, and Trinity has never been something she shows much of. So this was a surprise.
The gym was a nightmare last night. I did 2 different warm ups and still nothing available to workout on... After being there 30 minutes all I had managed to do was 15 minutes of warm ups and 3 sets of 15 on the Push Press machine? Not sure what the name is but it is like a horizontal push press or squat thrust machine... The lines for the legs stuff were 2-3 deep and that was pairs of people. I was going to do some upper body instead but to be honest everything was taken. It was quite literally packed in there. I swear it was probably close to legal capacity if not over...
I love that they put a functional fitness section in there but that took up half of the old weight room so now the actual lifting equipment is just not enough with all the resolutioners. Hell it is barely enough with the normal crowd.
Anyway after 40 minutes at the gym and not a work set done I said screw it and went home. It was already getting kind of late so I didn't try to lift in the garage at that point.
I think tonight I am just going to go to the garage and hit up squats, extensions, probably some shelc's for hammies. I will have to figure something out for the adductors, and I have a calf raise platform at the house too. I just don't feel like messing with that crowd and would rather be outside in the cold...
kenpoengineer
Well-known member
Simple solution. Move to the house next to mine. Gym time starts at 6 AM every morning!
booneman77
Legend
ugh the resolution crowd is the worst... I jsut got back up here in WI and the planet fitness here is the same as you described... packed full of people I've never seen before and all doing the dumbest things i've ever seen. saw a guy yesterday literally curling 20lb dumbells using what can only be described as a "spinabifida-esquq" form and motion... I really wanted to ask him if he was trying to work his biceps or his hip thusters and lower back ha
MrKleen73
Legend
Can you even imagine the places those workouts could take us! Martial Arts drills, rolling, flexibility work, strength and hypertrophy work, conditioning drills, heck even sparring...
MrKleen73
Legend
Spinabifida-esque form of motion!!!! LMAO I could picture that. Great, now I am an insensitive prick for laughing at this. It's all your fault.
booneman77
Legend
Spinabifida-esque form of motion!!!! LMAO I could picture that. Great, now I am an insensitive prick for laughing at this. It's all your fault.
I figure if I'm going to hell, I'll try to take some of the good guys with me to help ease the transition haha
MrKleen73
Legend
Finished up my muscle round workout a little while ago. Man my legs were getting their ass kicked!!!! I used the SSB for squats, took a minute to readjust to them.
Muscle rounds are 6 cluster sets of 4 with 10 seconds between them. You shoot for somewhere around your 15 rep max to start.
SSB Squats - 245x4,4,4,4,4,3 - I figured in my current shape I could squat 275 straight bar for 15 reps and the SSB feels 20-30lbs heavier so 245 should have been close to my 15 rep max. I was right! I failed on the last set. I will jump to 255 or 265 next time I do them.
Leg Extensions - 12 plates x 4,4,4,4,4,2
Alternating SHELC 4,4,4,4,4,4 - Sliding Hamstring Elevated Leg Curl
Occluded thigh stretches
Barbell Biceps Curls 75x4,4,4,4,4,1
Reverse Curls 25x25 x 3 sets, tennis elbow requires much lighter weight... but still training to get the blood flow to the area...
Occluded Biceps stretches
Came in the house looking big then had some lean turkey spaghetti with extra meat along with finishing my peri workout shake.
Muscle rounds are 6 cluster sets of 4 with 10 seconds between them. You shoot for somewhere around your 15 rep max to start.
SSB Squats - 245x4,4,4,4,4,3 - I figured in my current shape I could squat 275 straight bar for 15 reps and the SSB feels 20-30lbs heavier so 245 should have been close to my 15 rep max. I was right! I failed on the last set. I will jump to 255 or 265 next time I do them.
Leg Extensions - 12 plates x 4,4,4,4,4,2
Alternating SHELC 4,4,4,4,4,4 - Sliding Hamstring Elevated Leg Curl
Occluded thigh stretches
Barbell Biceps Curls 75x4,4,4,4,4,1
Reverse Curls 25x25 x 3 sets, tennis elbow requires much lighter weight... but still training to get the blood flow to the area...
Occluded Biceps stretches
Came in the house looking big then had some lean turkey spaghetti with extra meat along with finishing my peri workout shake.
Hyde
Legend
So much room for activities! Lol
What kind of gym are you at? I guess it helps that I always train mornings, when resolutioners don’t have the resolve to train apparently
MrKleen73
Legend
I am sure we would expand and share space to make it all work!
It is a 24Hr Fitness, and not one of the bigger ones. It's a sport, but after the floods they added a large section of cushioned astro turf, 4 of those rope climbing machines. Some sleds and one of those prowler on wheels things. A few cushioned flipping tires and what not. It basically took up half of the old weight room floor. So now there are maybe 2-3 machines per body part tops and the resolutioners just filled that up completely.
Between the masses of people and the lack of gym etiquette there was no getting anything done. All of the vets were just shaking their heads looking frustrated.
Studhorse
Legend
Got to love the first of the year. give it 30 days and it will be back to normal.
My gym has been a nightmare. I just walk up and say I'm working in. they just look at you like what are you doing I was using that.
I had a guy on monday night that was just standing on the Hack slide on his cell phone. I told him I was going to work in. he told me he had one set left. I was like thats cool went over to get me a sip of my Intra and came back and he was still there on his cell phone. after about 3 min. I told him there were some texting chairs over there and he just looked at me and kept surfing on his phone. I told him to sh it or get off the pot and he left and went and talked to the manager. the manager came over and asked what the problem was.I told him I was going to work in with him. he told me he had one more set left. I was like cool I will just wait. after 5 min. He was still surfing the internet and I told him there were some chairs over there, this is used for exercise. the manager just laughed and the guy walked off and went out the door.
MrKleen73
Legend
Oh I have done that before, I tend to ask people. You didn't read the contract you signed when you became a member did you? Says that you must allow others to work in with you. No big deal, I will just go get the manager and they will remove you from the machine... maybe even out of the club for the day.
Normally there is something muttered like a$$hole or something but they move. However with this crowd that would have probably been at every station... Another person I went up and asked how many set left and it was a lot so I told them I was going to work in with them on triceps extensions. So the only difference was just moving a pin from one weight to the other was all that was needed. The person got upset and walked away telling someone else that I stole their station. That person asked me why I did it and I laughed and said I didn't steal anything. I worked in with her and she walked away. She is welcome to do her sets, but I am going to do my sets in between her sets... That's what work in with you means.
I would not expect anyone to work me in if they or me were using much more weight than the other. To me that gets to be a bit inconvenient and would be inconsiderate of me to impose. However when it comes down to moving a pin up or down in the weight stack, there is no excuse not to let someone work in.
I honestly keep an eye out for others who are looking at the equipment I am using. When I notice them eyeballing my station. I ACTUALLY OFFER THEM TO WORK IN WITH ME!!!! HOLY CRAP IMAGINE THAT!!!!!!!!
booneman77
Legend
i wouldnt be the slightest bit mad if a gym banned cell phones. I literally made it a point to leave mine in a locker until I had to use it for the training app for my coaching right now. Soon as thats over, im back to peace and quiet ha
MrKleen73
Legend
I always have my phone on me as it is my source of music but often I sit in in the side pocket of my gym bag. I only really pull it out to record the occasional set to check form or record an attempted PR. My wife knows that if she needs me while I am at the gym she will either have to wait, come get me, or call the gym and have them locate me if an emergency. Now I have my old phone and am loading a bunch of music on there to use. Once that is done my normal phone will likely be back in the locker.
Studhorse
Legend
I hear ya! I will have voice mails or text when I get done working out. Like: Oh you must be at the gym give me a call when your done.
I'm old school and use paper spreadsheet logs. I'm sure I piss off a few people because I take up a table with all my stuff on it.
Now my daughter logs her workouts on her phone.
Studhorse
Legend
I still have my little Ipod shuffle I think it is called with my tunes on it. its so small! I don't know what I will do if it stops working.