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I just.....i feel empty

1) Cut back on the drama. Regardless if you want to believe it or not, there's much more important things going on in your life than lifting and your ex-gf combined.

2) Stop Whining. All you're doing in this thread is whining about highschool heartbreak, something you'll laugh at when you're older. Whining doesn't solve problems, it potentiates them, and aggrevates people who are trying to help.

3) Unsubscribe to this thread and get yourself a hobby. When you have a void that you want full, the sensible thing to do is fill it. Of course, you could also opt to sit back and cry about how the square beg doesn't fit in the round hole, but at the end of the day, the void is still there.

If life didn't have it's low points, how could we tell when we reach a high point? Dry your tears, have some milk and cookies, and learn how to get on with life because it sure as **** isn't going to get any easier.
 
East1600Plus said:
thnxs guys for the tips...i just like did everything for her and i put so much into it and i love her so much, i like dont even have the motivation to lift...
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Look at it this way. With few minor exceptions, she should be going to you if she's feeling bad, not away. For the whole support and nurturing thing. She doesn't have the (figurative) balls to break up straight out so she's stringing you along. That kind of disrespect should light a fire under your ass to start setting some new lifting records out of pure rage.
 
East,
Grow some balls bro. You are learning how women work. She's not interested anymore - so LEAVE HER.

If you think otherwise - you are wasting your damn time and energy.
 
all good advice, but really your 18, not that I am diminishing your feelings I AM NOT, BUT come on move on, enough is enough, your senoir yr is your best yr, HAVE FUN :) and for godsakes LIFT!!!!!!!!! dont let one girl effect you like this, in the long run your going to be more mad at yourself that you wasted such, time and thought on her........................

TC
 
Rejection and desire are closely related , it is easy to take for granted what you have and think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.

she may or may not have someone lined up, she may be unsure about her feelings for you or just need a break, maybe is a bit bored and wants a bit of drama between you two. One thing is for sure she has the upper hand. relationships can be very much like a complicated strategy game.

At the moment she is calling the shots leaving you vulnerable and empty in no mans land.

If you want her you need to play the game the right way.

One strategy. Let her know you accept she needs time but you been thinking about things and the way forward you think is to call it a day for the time being , right there you have the upper hand and the rejection desire balance should swing in your favour. you can say ive been thinking a lot about this and you were hurting a lot but youve got over it now and you want to get on with things and there is a girl who has asked you on a date but you dont want to feel like you are being dishonest.
 
ya so she is being really gay..and just says its nothing about guys and she is just figuring out what she wants and ****...and she says she is scared of being in a long-term relationship so ya know what...**** it lol I'm just gonna move on keep her as a friend who knows maybe she will wise up..but then she will have to work to get back with me after the **** she put me through

back to the gym i go!
 
Screw the friendship man. All it's going to do is bother you. Why be friends with somebody who can't be real with you? She obviously lacks the friendship qualities along with the relationship qualities. Kick her to the curb and don't look back. If she wants some sexual play get some hed and when she expects you to get her back tell her you gotta be somewhere and leave or kick her out the house.
 
East1600Plus said:
ya so she is being really gay..and just says its nothing about guys and she is just figuring out what she wants and ****...and she says she is scared of being in a long-term relationship so ya know what...**** it lol I'm just gonna move on keep her as a friend who knows maybe she will wise up..but then she will have to work to get back with me after the **** she put me through

back to the gym i go!
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The friendship thing is just a security blanket, when the feelings fade you wont want a friend... You might find yourself saying "even if we arent together i hope she is happy" well thats normal. Hopefully you never "hate" her as this helps noone, but realise she is choosing to be part of your past, now look to your future. Im glad your starting to realise the selfishness, be yourself, act like a gentlemen and you can never regret your actions. If you let anger and blame cloud your mind it will only slow your recovery and hurt your character.
 
TheCSWFighter said:
Screw the friendship man. All it's going to do is bother you. Why be friends with somebody who can't be real with you? She obviously lacks the friendship qualities along with the relationship qualities. Kick her to the curb and don't look back. If she wants some sexual play get some hed and when she expects you to get her back tell her you gotta be somewhere and leave or kick her out the house.
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What he said!!!!!!!

If you keep her around as a friend she will only mess with your head more and if she see's you with another girl she could f*** it up for you.
 
sdmf45 said:
What he said!!!!!!!

If you keep her around as a friend she will only mess with your head more and if she see's you with another girl she could f*** it up for you.
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ex's that are remain friendly with you LOVE to **** up your future relationships. It get's them goin that they can't possibly have you anymore. It's a game to them. They'll start calling you, trying to talk to you, etc. until when your new relationship goes to **** she'll be gone yet again. So don't ever think that he coming back is sincere. 9 times out 10 it isn't
 
she really likes me as a friend right now...thats what she really wants from me and i respect that and i enjoy her as a friend...its weird i guess...but u know i really love her, but i am just letting it all go...i told her if she wants to figure her **** out come talk to me and we can so whats going on but otherwise im just kinda moving on...i lifted today i feel great...i went out to lunch today with some other girls that r real good friends of mine and i dont know i'm just feeling pretty good about things
 
i cant wait for like a few years or even months from now when youll look back on this and clown you ownself for still even trying to be friends. YOu'll learn young buck. Stay in the gym, get big and refine your game, most of all have confidence. You will see the gayest ass ugly dudes with dime pieces just because they have confidence and verbal game. Sh1t I get every girl i want, but then again I p1ss excellence.:icon_lol:
 
East,
You'll learn when you get older (I hope).

You need to avoid contact with her for the next 2 to 3 months. If she sees you smile - but don't stop and talk to her. Avoid her when you can. Don't return calls/emails/IMs/whatever.

As close as you were with her - it's for the best for your frame of mind just to drop her like a bad habit. Stop hanging around her. Don't be her friend.
I know it'll be hard. But - you gotta man up.
 
jmh80 said:
East,
You'll learn when you get older (I hope).

You need to avoid contact with her for the next 2 to 3 months. If she sees you smile - but don't stop and talk to her. Avoid her when you can. Don't return calls/emails/IMs/whatever.

As close as you were with her - it's for the best for your frame of mind just to drop her like a bad habit. Stop hanging around her. Don't be her friend.
I know it'll be hard. But - you gotta man up.
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really? wow that kinda seems extreme...even if we actually really are really good friends? b/c we have so many memories with eachother ya know? and she likes to joke around and talk about em still...(even the sex parts lol) but i understand just to forget about getting back with her I'll let her come to me...but I'm gonna move on its hard to move on from a girl u love but ya know... i'll just do this :bb2: and they come a runnin :)
 
East1600Plus said:
really? wow that kinda seems extreme...even if we actually really are really good friends? b/c we have so many memories with eachother ya know? and she likes to joke around and talk about em still...(even the sex parts lol) but i understand just to forget about getting back with her I'll let her come to me...but I'm gonna move on its hard to move on from a girl u love but ya know... i'll just do this :bb2: and they come a runnin :)
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We're all speaking from experience here. You should avoid contact because it will stop the rollercoaster ride. If you hang around her you will look for a sign that she wants to get back with you, and the second you get it you will get your hopes up again, only to come crashing back down later. Its much easier to sever the emotional ties by cutting her out of your life completely. If you want to be friends after 2 or so months then thats fine, but shes going to jerk you around for the ego boost. Sorry, reality is a *****.

Also don't say thats shes "different" or "not like that" I thought so at one point to, but its never true. If she was, she wouldn't be doing this in the first place, regardless of her "reasons". You can learn this now or later, but you're going to learn it. Ask every guy in this thread, its happened to them before and we're trying to pass our knowledge on to you. Your life though, you can take it or leave it.
 
That is extreme - but I think you need to do extreme at this point. In fact, I'm sure of it.

Think about it - you are changing your lifestyle totally at this point because she's still on your mind.
That isn't fair to you.


I think someone said it here already - she has the POWER in this relationship (friendship/GF/whatever - she has you by the balls).
It's damn near impossible to turn the tables when that happens.

You just gotta understand it's just how most women work. They'll use you if you let them - and this chick is doing just that.



Seriously - do you honestly think I'd be helping a dude that thinks the '95 Huskers are the GOAT unless I really, really, really thought he needed it???????
 
East1600Plus said:
but I'm gonna move on its hard to move on from a girl u love but ya know... i'll just do this :bb2: and they come a runnin :)
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Define love, and ask youself if it's really love that you're feeling, or is it more of a security blanket, like when a child refuses to go to sleep without a nite-lite.

I've always defined love as the unconditional concern for another person's best interests and well-being. If you follow this definition, you'll see that you do not love her, since letting her move on and do her own thing would be something of her best interest, (something you don't want to do). You want to be able to give a rat's-*** about her under the conditions that you two will be able to say you're 'together', hang out with her, etc. That's not love, that's conditional love, and conditional love is just being selfish (which is why it almost always ends in a divorce court). Under this rationale, which I'm sure other's have already touched up upon, it would be a greater sign of loving this girl if you were to let her move on and do her own thing. You've said those 3 little words too many times, that you started to believe it, I know, I've been there. The bottom line is that you need to realize that whatever feelings you think you have, you don't have, and it's time for a cheeseburger.

:burger:
 
East1600Plus said:
really? wow that kinda seems extreme...even if we actually really are really good friends? b/c we have so many memories with eachother ya know? and she likes to joke around and talk about em still...(even the sex parts lol) but i understand just to forget about getting back with her I'll let her come to me...but I'm gonna move on its hard to move on from a girl u love but ya know... i'll just do this :bb2: and they come a runnin :)
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DUDE YOU ARE GETTING PLAYED! She jokes about them because she wants YOU to keep thinking about those moments! She wants YOU to stay around as a safety blanket! She knows that you're a sucker for bull**** therefore she's just playing mind games with you making you think that she is just sitting there day dreaming about all the good times. If that was the case then the broad would have never needed a break in the first place!

Man up and step outside the box for a second bub. You are not good friends! If you were then she would have been real with you from the beginning of this. Get it through your head! She wants you as a friend because she feels a sense of control over you in case she plays the field of dicks and needs someone to fall back on emotionally when things go wrong.

Overall learn a lesson from this. If you keep her around her mindgames are going to drive you nuts and your gonna lose your **** with her. Say some things you don't want to and ultimatly feel guilty for something she did wrong. That's how it goes. You can either play the game or move on.

Believe me when I say your girl is no different from all of our past girls. We speak from experience and these are the tall-tell signs of a skeeze. She is obviously not your friend if she couldn't be up front and be real. Get over it. Lose her number, lose her e-mail, lose the pictures, pack your bags and get the **** out before you do damage to yourself trying to hold onto something for the next three months that isn't there.
 
I didnt read all of the posts but i have to say when my gf that i loved with all my heart and soul left me it was the greatest thing for my bodybuilding! Thats really the only plus that came out of it but oh well. I just pumped like nobody'd business and let her move on with her life because i loved her that much. Love is not selfish and you will want her to be happy if you really loved her. Alot of the time, infact mostly always, we guys have to suck it up and let the girl break our hearts, its just the manly thing to do lol take the pain. Anyway after 9 months she will probably not come back and most likely (i hate to say it) has someone else she wants to be with. Girls hardly leave a relationship that is not abusive and such unless they want to be with someone else imo. Keep your head up and use it as motivation to lift with some serious intensity! good luck.
 
The problem with some women as they cant handle power, theyre nice and sweet... next thing ya know she realises how easy it is to get and control men. Pu$$y is power and some women use it like a piece or cheese on a mouse trap. BAM !!
"women can fake an orgasm, men can fake a whole relationship" you must learn this art until she deserves your heart.
 
somewhatgifted said:
The problem with some women as they cant handle power, theyre nice and sweet... next thing ya know she realises how easy it is to get and control men. Pu$$y is power and some women use it like a piece or cheese on a mouse trap. BAM !!
"women can fake an orgasm, men can fake a whole relationship" you must learn this art until she deserves your heart.
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i like that quote.
 
East1600Plus said:
So today my girlfriend tells me she needs to take a break..she is having a lot of stress. She told me know i cant just end things with you just like that because i love you, but i need some "me" time. I just feel empty right now and torn up....i just dont know what to do. I pray she really does want to just take a break and just spend some time relaxing..and wants to get back together soon, but its just so hard to think of it like that. We have been going out for about 9 months, and i honestly love her to death, I will do anything for her thats why its just so hard to say ok...I'll live until u r ready for me again...

:saw: i just kind of want that to happen to me right now
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lol- I just went through something like that...

The translations of her statement include:
" For some reason She's feeling lost, and it's one of those times she needs to get her head right""

She realizes that you and her are getting serious and she needs to figure out if your the right man for her"OR

There are other reasons as well, but if she said she needs time, then it's becasue of a feeling. Females go on feeling, and it's going to mess with ya becasue your going to try and figure out what she's thinking,... and she's not "thinking".

Honestly, the best thing you can do, it go hang out with some other females, maybe a date or two.
Dont ask her WHEN she's comming back, or how much time she needs becasue she wont have answers.
Dont hide the fact that other females are intereted in you either. Dont flaunt it, but dont hide it.

If it's anythign to do with her feelings for you (like wether your the right man for her, becasue it could be that she's comptplating something longer, of she's going through some depression....) then she will feel VERY strongly that she doens't like it that your at least dating other women. That will be the answer SHE was looking for, and eventually, she'll come back- (she has to be confronted with the idea that your in demand, and she doesn't have forever... she'll FEEL this)

She may also NOT be feeling that attraction, but she has effection for you...
Remedy- remember exactly how you were like when ya'll were still dating, and get in that mindset, and get your ass back there! Be who she was ATTRACTED to again!

These are the only things you can influence- your actions.

Honestly, all the other possibilities you can't do anythign about, and you sure as hell dont want to know about them :P

lol- when my gf did this a few weeks ago, It took ALL that I had to do what I mentioned...
She's conflicted- but she also can not "choose" wether or not to be attracted to you... it's never a choice.

I lost 7lbs durring that week- get yourself some Retain or something :P Make sure you have other people around, and this will work itself out trust me
 
xtraflossy said:
Females go on feeling, and it's going to mess with ya becasue your going to try and figure out what she's thinking,... and she's not "thinking".
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That's high school girls in a nutshell.
 
She's 16!!!!!!!!

xtraflossy I understand what your saying but you are talking about women not high school girls. This girl won't have any clue what she wants for another 4 years or so. Women our age may need some time to see if they want to go down the serious path because if its getting serious then the next step could be engagement.

I don't think this is the case with this girl at all. See girls respond to a confident guy, one who is on the edge of being an a$$hole and can still be nice and listen to her. If you were with her almost all the time then you probably just smothered her and "changed" according to what she likes instead of saying "No way am I doing that" or just disagreeing with her at all.

The big mistake almost everyone makes when their that age is they want to be with their girlfriends all the time. That never leaves any room for either person. You will just turn into the "good friend" or what is happening to you right now.

You need to move on and forget about all hope with her. SHE IS PLAYING YOU!!!!!!! PU$$Y POWER!!!!!!!
 
thesinner said:
That's high school girls in a nutshell.
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That's ALL females.

I'm not saying that females are unable to express themselves logicly, but her struggle seems to be one of the heart....
And the heart doesnt listen to reason
 
jmh80 said:
Seriously - do you honestly think I'd be helping a dude that thinks the '95 Huskers are the GOAT unless I really, really, really thought he needed it???????
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They are the GOAT......for now. We'll see after Calahan gets that West Coast offense pumping in the next few years.
 
xtraflossy said:
That's ALL females.

I'm not saying that females are unable to express themselves logicly, but her struggle seems to be one of the heart....
And the heart doesnt listen to reason
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I highly doubt a descent looking highschool girl who is 16 is seriously contemplating right now whether she wants to stay together forever with her boyfriend. She just doesn't feel like stickin to him anymore and it's fairly obvious considering college is down the road.

If it's not called off now it will be then. I agree completely that this is a mindset with women and not little highschool girls. Other huge factors are financial stability, goals in life, etc. All of these are factors that can't be determined at this point in time but can be as they both grow up. So if he gets a job and the income isn't enough to spoil her how she see's fit then he's done for.
 
PS

Women can pick up on if your trying to make them jealous or not. If your making blatant attempts she'll know and she'll just use the oppurtunity to gloat about her own experiences which she KNOWS will hurt you even more. So instead of going on dates with girls with an intent to make her notice that your up for grabs go on dates with the intent to meet a much better girl. If that's not your goal then it's just as bad as waiting in your room sobbing and asking her "So how much longer?"

Oh and one more major thing. Avoid whining about how you got your heart broken on these other dates. I mean, unless you want them looking around for a quick exit. This immediatly puts you in the friend zone and girls don't want someone around with a piss poor attitude. Especially towards other girls because one of them did him wrong.
 
sdmf45 said:
She's 16!!!!!!!!

xtraflossy I understand what your saying but you are talking about women not high school girls. This girl won't have any clue what she wants for another 4 years or so. Women our age may need some time to see if they want to go down the serious path because if its getting serious then the next step could be engagement.

I don't think this is the case with this girl at all. See girls respond to a confident guy, one who is on the edge of being an a$$hole and can still be nice and listen to her. If you were with her almost all the time then you probably just smothered her and "changed" according to what she likes instead of saying "No way am I doing that" or just disagreeing with her at all.

The big mistake almost everyone makes when their that age is they want to be with their girlfriends all the time. That never leaves any room for either person. You will just turn into the "good friend" or what is happening to you right now.

You need to move on and forget about all hope with her. SHE IS PLAYING YOU!!!!!!! PU$$Y POWER!!!!!!!
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lol- I said the exact same thing.
Again, I never ment to imply that she had any clue what happened, or why she feels like that. Even if she did have a clue (as older females do) She "FELT" it first. thought about it second..

Rule # 1 in dating much younger women: You have to let them do their own thing.
Otherwise, you'll end up being a father in their eyes, -that kills attraction, which leaves you with that curious dry feeling below your waist, or, in other words, leaves her effectionate for you, but not sexually attracted. (that probably is EXACTLY what she's feeling now. the good ol' "I love you, but Im not IN love with you)and that's no good.
Take her out, treat her as a more mature lady, let her feel grown up,... but you have to make yourself the center of HER world, not the center of yours!!
This is what oyu had when you started out, and that kept her comming back.
What happened was you changed (in the ways mentioned above). The "Dating an older guy" excitement, anticipation and attraction/sorta taboo left once you took all those things that caused them in the first place away.

She needs space. she doesn't FEEL that attraction the way she used to.
If your lucky, you can get back to your old self (being indifferent to wether she comes back or not) or at least make it appear that way, and she'll notice.
HEll,.. if she comes back,you can even tell her that you'd like to go back to just "dating" her for a bit, see how it goes (OMG does that work wonders!!! - she will scratch and claw for every oppertunity to get your approval ... but that's assuming you have the "elusive" social proof that she cant get dating guys her own age.)
Honestly, you have to be wanted by OTHER GIRLS SHE KNOWS if your going to get this one back.
 
great advice on all...who knows what will happen i am gonna learn not to be with a g/f as much and not to worry as much so i have "learned" **** and plus i have learned that well...GIRLS R ****ING INSANE! lol only a girl can come up with this statement and i quote

I dont want to be single but i dont want to be in a relationship --WHAT...THE...****??
 
xtraflossy said:
That's ALL females.
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Damn, I was hoping it would get better as time goes on. I'm not quite old enough to broaden the conclusion to older females.



I dont want to be single but i dont want to be in a relationship --WHAT...THE...****??
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You realize your describing every man's dream, don't you? To have the ladies without behind bound by the constraints of commitment in a relationship. Who wouldn't want that? Be there for all the good times, and skip town during the bad. Quit worrying about pussy, and just take the time to have a little fun.
 
jas123 said:
They are the GOAT......for now. We'll see after Calahan gets that West Coast offense pumping in the next few years.
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B*tch please.

That team ain't had no balance on offense. Canes would roll a young Sean Taylor up to the line to put 8 in the box (5 1st round picks and 3 Pro Bowlers) while Ed Reed locks down those white WR's Nebraska had that caught like 1000 yards TOTAL passing.
Jon Vilma showed ya boy Crouch how we handle the option in 2001, eh? ;) (Que Tom Jackson - "Jacked Up!!!")

2001 Miami had a better back-field than 1995 Nebraska.
Bet on that.

Frank Gore (pre-ACL injury mind you), Willis McGahee, Clinton Portis, and Najeh Davenport.

Come on bruh - that's 3 Pro Bowlers.
Nebraska had a sophmore Ahman Green and Lawrence Phillips and Joel Mackevica w/ Frazier.

Nebraska wasn't battle tested period in '95 - they did blow teams out, I'll give them definate credit for that. But - put them in a dog fight - not sure if they got it.
And that Fiesta domination of the Gators should probably be known as the last Gator team before Bob Stoops came on as defensive coordinator - TOTALLY soft.


Finally - the Canes are 3-1 against Nebraska in champsionship games ('83, '91, and '01 vs. '94 for NU).

Canes win by 10 after "holding" Nebraska to 275 yards on the ground - but Reed picks off Frazier twice. Jeremy Shockey runs wild on that Nebraska D without an LB athletic enough or big enough to guard. There were some damn good pash rushers on that team (Bryce Paup I think) though - but I don't see any good WIL's to cover Shockey.




Alright - didn't mean to turn this into a football thread.
 
LOL I read most posts, and you guys say women are confusing, you guys are the ones.........Someone made a comment and i dont remember who, that when a girl breaks it off its because she wants to date someone else, not always true WHEN YOUR OLDER, I did just that it was poor treatment that made me do that.............I would rather be alone for the right reason than with someone for the wrong.............

Good luck east :) move on, date, be single, have fun your a senior...........best yr of your life................
 
East1600Plus said:
great advice on all...who knows what will happen i am gonna learn not to be with a g/f as much and not to worry as much so i have "learned" **** and plus i have learned that well...GIRLS R ****ING INSANE! lol only a girl can come up with this statement and i quote

I dont want to be single but i dont want to be in a relationship --WHAT...THE...****??
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lol- I asked my girl bout that...
means she just wants to date.
MY translation,.. she wants to see other guys... and um,.. probably has one in mind. OR, you just got yourself a FB ...
 
TheCSWFighter said:
I highly doubt a descent looking highschool girl who is 16 is seriously contemplating right now whether she wants to stay together forever with her boyfriend. She just doesn't feel like stickin to him anymore and it's fairly obvious considering college is down the road.

If it's not called off now it will be then. I agree completely that this is a mindset with women and not little highschool girls. Other huge factors are financial stability, goals in life, etc. All of these are factors that can't be determined at this point in time but can be as they both grow up. So if he gets a job and the income isn't enough to spoil her how she see's fit then he's done for.
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lol- #1 thing a girl "wants" is to feel special.
Highschool or woman. She's not comptplating wether everything is right... she's acting on feeling. she's not thinking about those things, she feeling something (yeah, I repeated that)
But, your right,.. I went throught the same thing before collage. But we choose to stick together until then. We had to hate each other in order to "do that" (make the break easier).

I will tell you, there IS a chance you can get her back, but ya kinda have to transend all this now- to be the man you'd need to be to get her back, well,.. that man also wouldn't want her back, becasue he knows he has options. kinda a catch 22

The best thing to do is learn from this. Just except it as is, and grow from the expirence.
 
toughchick401 said:
LOL I read most posts, and you guys say women are confusing, you guys are the ones.........Someone made a comment and i dont remember who, that when a girl breaks it off its because she wants to date someone else, not always true WHEN YOUR OLDER, I did just that it was poor treatment that made me do that.............I would rather be alone for the right reason than with someone for the wrong.............

Good luck east :) move on, date, be single, have fun your a senior...........best yr of your life................
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well,. I jsut didnt think THAT one needed to be mentioned,.. more obvious reasoning like that is just kind of a given.

(lol- just for a mind fuk, ask yourself how long you dated the last "nice guy" and compare that to the asshol3 you ended it with... usually that answer is an interesting one :P
-ok, Im done here. I dont know what else I can add.

Good luck in the future man. I honestly kow how you feel
(PM me if you want a great way to past all this,..)
 
xtraflossy said:
lol- #1 thing a girl "wants" is to feel special.
Highschool or woman. She's not comptplating wether everything is right... she's acting on feeling. she's not thinking about those things, she feeling something (yeah, I repeated that)
But, your right,.. I went throught the same thing before collage. But we choose to stick together until then. We had to hate each other in order to "do that" (make the break easier).

I will tell you, there IS a chance you can get her back, but ya kinda have to transend all this now- to be the man you'd need to be to get her back, well,.. that man also wouldn't want her back, becasue he knows he has options. kinda a catch 22

The best thing to do is learn from this. Just except it as is, and grow from the expirence.
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Oh believe me. Me and my girl went on hiatus over some **** for awhile and weren't even on good enough terms to say a word to one another. Then awhile later we just started talking before and everything came out in the open with both of us.

We both had matured and knew then what we wanted. Sometimes it just takes getting out there to make sure that what you feel is really what you want to feel. I'm a firm believer in making sure a woman has been out there and had experience with relationships and growing as a person before we date. If not then she could find her mind wandering.

You look at the huge divorce rate that's surfaced and a majority of relationships involving cheating are normally because they got married WAY too young. People are getting married right out of highschool. Yea it's cool, you can be highschool sweethearts but wait till after college to tie the knot. You can't have a succesful and secure relationship if you yourself lack confidence in being succesful and security on your own.
 
TheCSWFighter said:
I highly doubt a descent looking highschool girl who is 16 is seriously contemplating right now whether she wants to stay together forever with her boyfriend.

If it's not called off now it will be then. I agree completely that this is a mindset with women and not little highschool girls. Other huge factors are financial stability, goals in life, etc. All of these are factors that can't be determined at this point in time but can be as they both grow up. So if he gets a job and the income isn't enough to spoil her how she see's fit then he's done for.
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all so true, but not all 16 year olds are bad! most are..... but some make excellent girlfriends. honestly, most girls/women arent evil. they just tend to want the both of best worlds alot of times, especially when they are young.

your girlfriend probably is kinda doing her last cling on to you because you are someone shes grown comfortable having around but she still wants to have her single fun. most people cant let go of comfortable relationships very easily. most people arent ready to settle so young.

the key to having a great young relationship is to really put your expectations on the table, be real, love doesnt conquer all..... and also being able to really know yourselves... many people dont know themselves as well as they think they do:

views on:
life
finances
politics (some may think this is irrelevant but its truly important)
motivation
dreams
realistic/pessimistic/optimistic
strengths
weaknesses

most really dont know what they think of the above and if they do, they cant answer honestly. the ones that do and can are usually quite happy,and confident from what i've encountered.

too many people compromise and make excuses for their significant others instead of just letting go. people almost never change..... an unconfident, jealous, unsure, negative, etc.... person is usually that same person forever....sad to say....
 
Quoted:

"your girlfriend probably is kinda doing her last cling on to you because you are someone shes grown comfortable having around but she still wants to have her single fun. most people cant let go of comfortable relationships very easily. most people arent ready to settle so young."


This is true for all people. Using age in a senerio where this is the case is only using age as an excuse. This is also true with guys as well. And my current exploration is finding ways to bring her OUT of this comfort zone, through ways Im still exploring. I'm not tring to eleminate ALL comfort, as stability, safe, cozy, assurence all have a place in a relationship.
People's view on all the subjects listed above:
life
finances
politics (some may think this is irrelevant but its truly important)
motivation
dreams
realistic/pessimistic/optimistic
strengths
weaknesses...........

These all change with the evolution of a person, and their "place in life".
I honestly wish that Love could conquor all, but the type of love that one would expirence in the beginning of a relationship is different then the matured love expirenced later, and THAT love DOES tend to factor other things, mentioned above.

All this being said, and not being sure if the poster is even keeping track of this thread anymore, theoriticly, it IS possible to get her back, but that would have way more implications about your view about yourself that it might not be worth to acknowlage these to yourself until you've grown more as a person and those views that you did have regarding yourself are no longer in Your reality.

The thing is, when people READ this thread, and are contributing to it, they are THINKING rationally. But when things happen , their in real life. The difference is emotion, guiding and playing a part.... and for women (all women) emotion will play MORE of a role in actions then it would a guy, in comparrision.

The questiion is not what women want, but what they RESPOND to.

You (the poster) have to ask yourself what you want FIRST, and THEN take action to accomplish that task (wether that be staying with her if she comes back, not excepting this type of behavior from her, realizing that most relationships will end and end things on a good note, and maybe you'll run into her 10 years from now, and she'll have respect for you, plus she may become attracted yet again, and who knows.

But remember; SHE is a GUEST in YOUR reality. Once you allow your life to revolve around HER actions, your no longer in control of your reality.
 
xtraflossy said:
Quoted:



But remember; SHE is a GUEST in YOUR reality. Once you allow your life to revolve around HER actions, your no longer in control of your reality.
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that is prolly the best thing i've heard ever...

i havent been talking to her and lately she has been calling my friend crying about me and all upset..and now she has been calling me and asking me to hang out and im just going eh maybe and today we are suppose to hang out i guess but who knows something happens cool...something doesnt...w/e...i know if she does wanna go back out im setting things in perspective that if she wants to do this "break" thing again Its over for good and i'll tell her straight up
 
if she wants to do this "break" thing again Its over for good and i'll tell her straight up

I hope so after 4 pages worth of posts on this...lots of good advice
 
sdmf45 said:
if she wants to do this "break" thing again Its over for good and i'll tell her straight up

I hope so after 4 pages worth of posts on this...lots of good advice
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ya..would u imagine that though? she didnt call lol ha..i half expected it and she said sorry i was doing h/w with jamie (her ***** of a friend) and i was just going ya w/e no big deal its just an xmas tree doesnt bother me and she kept saying oh well plz plz dont be mad at me and i kept just going w/e im fine just an xmas tree...but i do feel like punching a tree b/c it seems she really is kinda just ****ing around with me (well **** there r so many girls out there are tehy all evil?)
 
East, I would kill to be 18 again with what I know now because I at one point I was stupid enough to believe my high school sweethart would be the only girl I'd be with and we'd live happy in happy land but I'm not very romantic anymore.

You're gonna have to do some fishing and experiment with many women out there. Not all women are evil, most are actually good people, but that doesn't mean you should settle for the first good woman you find. Another thing, don't have any expectations and don't ever put the "pu$$y on the pedestal". Good luck and enjoy your youth because that can't be purchased.

XTRAFLOSSY gave you great advice, I suggest you incorporate his recommendations.
 
I hope its not just me but ive been followin this thread and I just cant take it anymore. I dont know why i keep reading all the great responses to the posters problem, because clearly he still hasnt got it yet. You can tell by the way he talks about her. Im sorry bro Im not tryin to offend anyone, especially the MEN including myself who have passed on great experience and advice but to no avail. Later....
 
When she called (to say she's sorry) you shouldnt have answered the phone.

Answer ever OTHER call, regardless.
Answer ever OTHER call, regardless.
Answer ever OTHER call, regardless.
Answer ever OTHER call, regardless.

The kicker is, when you don't answer, wait 20min, and send a text message,... the first one would say "so what's up"...

She will be wondering what the hell your doing, why youi didn't just call. She will assume your with another woman...

A few times of answering every other call, and returning the others with text masszages that are short, and you dont freaking turn it into something as long as this thread, and you'll have your answer in a week.

GO BE BUSY!
 
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