The thing I am struggling with right now is not weighing myself every week. I have to do it, its like a religion to me. Its how I monitor my progress but it also creates a sense of OCD for myself because I always want to make the weight I am shooting for the following week. So that means tons of dedication and sacrifice away from other things. Such as tonight, weigh in is tomorrow morning. I have the opportunity to go out tonight and I'm choosing not to because I decided a few weeks ago to do a mini cut. Tomorrow is my day to cheat so my reward will be after I step on that scale at 5 am.
That not only is a huge red flag, it shows you have a horrible relationship with a scale (A tool), body image and relationship with food to negate going out. Who cares if you do a mini cut 2 weeks from today or a month from today? nobody but yourself. Your structing your life around your sacle and weighting in which is a bad thing.
You are not getting paid to track calories
You are not in contest prep
You don't have to spend your nights thinking about waking up and weighing in.
Unless you are 2 weeks out from a show, in contest prep, or doing a photoshoot for you to ignore going out, enjoying moderation, or practicing social balance is a huge red flag. You need to re-evaluate your goals, priorities, and your mental mindset. Sounds like you may need to seek a psycologist to deal with your mental thoughts.
You should stop and take a step back and totally re evaluate your goals and relationship towards what your doing. Your balance lacks.