Thanks for the replies. Yes, I am very dedicated. I have had several injuries halt my results over the years and It seemed like every year or 2 I was starting from the ground up again. It sucks. But I'm healthy again, been back in it for almost a year and going strong.
I look better now than I have in a long time and that's mainly because of my diet. Im smaller in size but in better shape and better definition than previously. Ill try to get more info on a new diet for my goals. I am strict with my current diet believe me, and I've stripped a lot of the fat that accrued over the years because I put myself in a calorie deficit. I definitely lost some muscle, which is why I'm down to 155, but I needed the stomach fat gone quick as well as the puffiness all around. The muscle I can rebuild faster than I can burn the fat. That's just the way my body works. I just can't seem to get "there" which is why I'm doing another cycle. It's been several years since my last one. And they've always given me the boost I need to break a new barrier. The same reason everybody takes these things.
So with all due respect to you guys, you can stop preaching to me about why i shouldn't do a cycle unless you yourself are all natural and are against performance enhancing supplements because anybody on this forum is doing the same thing for the same reason as i am. Now, with that said, I've tried many, many meal plans over the years via bb.com, forums, etc and nothing has got me the body I know I'm capable of. The hard work is easy, I love working out and i love crossfit also, both have their place in my world for my goals, but it's the science behind it that's hard for me to dial in. i.e. a meal plan that works for me. I can pack on size, but I want size, and low bf%. That's where it gets tricky for me anyway. Thanks again and any other advice on this is always welcome.