Are you a Democrat or Republican???
- Thread starter Chad
- Start date
CDB
Registered User
If I had to choose between the two, which is like choosing between two fat whores as far as I'm concerned, I'd choose Republicans. They're scum, but at least when they take my money they give it to greedy corporations who might at least employ me. Democrats take my money and give it to welfare queens. Try getting a job off of one of them.
CDB
Registered User
No, it hasn't. But Haliburton might give me a job. Hilda in the trailer park, choking on deep fried oreos, likely wouldn't.
TripDog
Bananas
you thought wrong..........:ntome:
Chad
Banned
:rasp:
Trauma1
Legend
put your pants on son.........
Chad
Banned
did he run around naked a lot when he was a kid?
Trauma1
Legend
of course..... he was the retarded red headed step child....i bought him his first helmet for christmas one year
Chad
Banned
of course..... he was the retarded red headed step child....i bought him his first helmet for christmas one year
LOL!!! got him a helmet but no pants huh?
Trauma1
Legend
Lol, but be careful as a result he has ben known to occasionaly go commando in another man's fatigues :run:
Chad
Banned
oh he`s one of those huh? ok no sleep overs at trip`s house.:ntome:
spunkles182
Member
its hard to get it to go down when the Democrats control the House and Senate. but he does what he can.
Invalid Link Removed
Trauma1
Legend
yepper he is. I did my part with the helmet.....someone please buy the man some pants.:lol:
Chad
Banned
really? well he had his whole first term to do something. but i guess making up stories about WMD so we could go to war was more important. :thumbsup:
spunkles182
Member
spunkles182
Member
:cheers:
fair enough. im not a big bush fan, btw. i just dont believe he is satan (like the media portrays him as).
Chad
Banned
:thumbsup: no he`s not satan. he isn`t smart enough to be. :lol:
precious_roy
New member
Libertarian?I think both parties suck ass. That being said, I feel like I have a more left-wing viewpoint on social issues but when it comes to finance I'd rather not have the government telling me what I have to do with my money. I am a Republocrat.
BV
Tiberius
Member
I think both parties suck ass. That being said, I feel like I have a more left-wing viewpoint on social issues but when it comes to finance I'd rather not have the government telling me what I have to do with my money. I am a Republocrat.
BV
That fits the Libertarian viewpoint.
Government out of personal lives
Government stop interfering with economy
basically smaller government in general. What the Republicans used to be about.
spunkles182
Member
CDB
Registered User
The Libertarian party is a bit of a waste, though their ideology is the closest to mine. They had one good shot at the tree and ever since haven't even been able to pick up the axe.
BigVrunga
Well-known member
Yeah, I definitely share those views - unfortuantely the political system is corrupt, so the only choice you *really* have is either Democrat or Republican. I think smaller parties will have a shot eventually, but only if the major players continue to **** up long enough and the wealthy start losing money, and the general populace can get off their collective asses long enough to see through media hype and propaganda.
However, most folks who know how money works can succeed in any economy one way or another, so they'll keep voting for the party where they have the most influence.
bv
spatch
Registered User
What has hundreds of legs but only 8 teeth?
The front row at the Republican national convention.
Do republicans want sick people to use medical marijuana?
No, but presidents can use cocane.
Why dont republicans get mad when people write jokes about them?
because they cant read.
The front row at the Republican national convention.
Do republicans want sick people to use medical marijuana?
No, but presidents can use cocane.
Why dont republicans get mad when people write jokes about them?
because they cant read.
Tiberius
Member
Third parties can never work in a first past post system when national information is widely accessible everywhere as it is.
In years gone by, third parties were capable of gaining ground only because of people being unaware of the national trend and which 2 parties were the most popular nationwide. Now that the information is readily available on a minute by minute basis, no third party will ever be capable of gaining any more than 10% or so of the vote at most.
In years gone by, third parties were capable of gaining ground only because of people being unaware of the national trend and which 2 parties were the most popular nationwide. Now that the information is readily available on a minute by minute basis, no third party will ever be capable of gaining any more than 10% or so of the vote at most.
CDB
Registered User
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am!" The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon approximately 30 feet above sea level. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude." She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Republican.""I am," replied the man. "How did you guess?" "Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me." The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Democrat." "I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?" "Well" said the man, "You don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You've made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect ME to solve your problem. You're in EXACTLY the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's MY fault."
CDB
Registered User
A woman married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for her fourth wedding. "Of course, madam," replied the sales clerk, "exactly what type and color dress are you looking for?"
The bride to be said: "A long frilly white dress with a veil." The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married the first time - for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean? Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?"
"Well," replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk's directness, "I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as any first-time bride. You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding, he died as we were checking into our hotel.
My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the Limo on our way to our honeymoon that we had that wedding annulled Immediately and never spoke to each other again."
"What about your third husband?" asked the sales clerk.
"That one was a Democrat," said the woman, "and every night for four years, he just sat on the edge of the bed and told me how good it was going to be."
The bride to be said: "A long frilly white dress with a veil." The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married the first time - for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean? Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?"
"Well," replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk's directness, "I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as any first-time bride. You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding, he died as we were checking into our hotel.
My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the Limo on our way to our honeymoon that we had that wedding annulled Immediately and never spoke to each other again."
"What about your third husband?" asked the sales clerk.
"That one was a Democrat," said the woman, "and every night for four years, he just sat on the edge of the bed and told me how good it was going to be."
CDB
Registered User
Explaining Economics with Cows
LIBERAL
- You have two cows.
- Your neighbor has none.
- You feel guilty for being successful.
- Instead of giving your neighbor one of your cows, you write to your congressman, demanding that he pass legislation for more government programs to help your neighbor get a cow.
- You hold a concert to raise awareness for the cow-lessness.
- Barbara Streisand sings for the cow-less, who couldn't attend because ticket prices are so expensive that only people with 3 or 4 cows can afford to attend.
- You wear a ribbon that signifies that you care about cowless people, even though you really haven't done anything to help them at all.
CONSERVATIVE
- You have two cows.
- Your neighbor has none.
- So?
SOCIALIST
- You have two cows.
- The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
- You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.
COMMUNIST
- You have two cows.
- The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
- You wait in line for hours to get it.
- It is expensive and sour.
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
- You have two cows.
- You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
- You have two cows.
- The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.
BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
- You have two cows.
- The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours the milk down the drain.
AMERICAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
- You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows.
- You are surprised when one cow drops dead.
- You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have down sized and are reducing expenses.
- Your stock goes up.
FRENCH CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You go on strike because you want three cows.
- You go to lunch and drink wine.
- Life is good.
JAPANESE CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
- They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
- Most are at the top of their class at cow school.
GERMAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
- Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.
ITALIAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
- While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
- You break for lunch.
- Life is good.
RUSSIAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You have some vodka.
- You count them and learn you have four cows.
- You have some more vodka.
- You count them again and learn you have eight cows.
- The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.
TALIBAN CORPORATION
- You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
- You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts.
- Then you kill them and claim a US bomb blew them up while they were in the hospital.
IRAQI CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- They go into hiding.
- They send radio tapes of their mooing.
POLISH CORPORATION
- You have two bulls.
- Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.
CALIFORNIAN
- You have a cow and a bull.
- The bull is depressed.
- It has spent its life living a lie.
- It goes away for two weeks.
- It comes back after a taxpayer-paid sex-change operation.
- You now have two cows.
- One makes milk; the other doesn't.
- You try to sell the transgender cow.
- Its lawyer sues you for discrimination.
- You lose in court.
- You sell the milk-generating cow to pay the damages.
- You now have one rich, transgender, non-milk-producing cow.
- You change your business to beef.
- PETA pickets your farm.
- Jesse Jackson makes a speech in your driveway.
- Cruz Bustamante calls for higher farm taxes to help "working cows."
- Hillary Clinton calls for the nationalization of 1/7 of your farm "for the children."
- Gray Davis signs a law giving your farm to Mexico.
- The L.A. Times quotes five anonymous cows claiming you groped their teats.
- You declare bankruptcy and shut down all operations.
- The cow starves to death.
- The L.A.Times' analysis shows your business failure is Bush's fault.
LIBERAL
- You have two cows.
- Your neighbor has none.
- You feel guilty for being successful.
- Instead of giving your neighbor one of your cows, you write to your congressman, demanding that he pass legislation for more government programs to help your neighbor get a cow.
- You hold a concert to raise awareness for the cow-lessness.
- Barbara Streisand sings for the cow-less, who couldn't attend because ticket prices are so expensive that only people with 3 or 4 cows can afford to attend.
- You wear a ribbon that signifies that you care about cowless people, even though you really haven't done anything to help them at all.
CONSERVATIVE
- You have two cows.
- Your neighbor has none.
- So?
SOCIALIST
- You have two cows.
- The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
- You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.
COMMUNIST
- You have two cows.
- The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
- You wait in line for hours to get it.
- It is expensive and sour.
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
- You have two cows.
- You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
- You have two cows.
- The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.
BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
- You have two cows.
- The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours the milk down the drain.
AMERICAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
- You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows.
- You are surprised when one cow drops dead.
- You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have down sized and are reducing expenses.
- Your stock goes up.
FRENCH CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You go on strike because you want three cows.
- You go to lunch and drink wine.
- Life is good.
JAPANESE CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
- They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
- Most are at the top of their class at cow school.
GERMAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
- Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.
ITALIAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
- While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
- You break for lunch.
- Life is good.
RUSSIAN CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- You have some vodka.
- You count them and learn you have four cows.
- You have some more vodka.
- You count them again and learn you have eight cows.
- The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.
TALIBAN CORPORATION
- You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
- You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts.
- Then you kill them and claim a US bomb blew them up while they were in the hospital.
IRAQI CORPORATION
- You have two cows.
- They go into hiding.
- They send radio tapes of their mooing.
POLISH CORPORATION
- You have two bulls.
- Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.
CALIFORNIAN
- You have a cow and a bull.
- The bull is depressed.
- It has spent its life living a lie.
- It goes away for two weeks.
- It comes back after a taxpayer-paid sex-change operation.
- You now have two cows.
- One makes milk; the other doesn't.
- You try to sell the transgender cow.
- Its lawyer sues you for discrimination.
- You lose in court.
- You sell the milk-generating cow to pay the damages.
- You now have one rich, transgender, non-milk-producing cow.
- You change your business to beef.
- PETA pickets your farm.
- Jesse Jackson makes a speech in your driveway.
- Cruz Bustamante calls for higher farm taxes to help "working cows."
- Hillary Clinton calls for the nationalization of 1/7 of your farm "for the children."
- Gray Davis signs a law giving your farm to Mexico.
- The L.A. Times quotes five anonymous cows claiming you groped their teats.
- You declare bankruptcy and shut down all operations.
- The cow starves to death.
- The L.A.Times' analysis shows your business failure is Bush's fault.
kwyckemynd00
Registered User
You need another option: Libertarian (and you can always include those green party homos, too).
CDB
Registered User
The old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. "I want to become a Democrat. Get me a change of registration form." "You can do it", the lawyer said, "But why? You'll be dead soon, why do you want The old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. "I want to become a Democrat?" "That's my business! Get me the form!"
Four days later, the old man got his registration changed. His lawyer was at his bedside making sure his bill would be paid. Suddenly the old man was racked with fits of coughing, and it was clear that this would be the end. Still curious, the lawyer leaned over and said, "Please, before it's too late, tell me why you wanted to become a Democrat so badly before you died?" In a faint whisper, as he breathed his last, the old man said: "One less Democrat..."
Four days later, the old man got his registration changed. His lawyer was at his bedside making sure his bill would be paid. Suddenly the old man was racked with fits of coughing, and it was clear that this would be the end. Still curious, the lawyer leaned over and said, "Please, before it's too late, tell me why you wanted to become a Democrat so badly before you died?" In a faint whisper, as he breathed his last, the old man said: "One less Democrat..."
Chad
Banned
is there symble a Goat?
thesinner
Recovering AXoholic
A goat holding a bottle of KY
kwyckemynd00
Registered User
Okay, now tell me. How is our government going to save everyone's lives?
Its very naive to think that they can. If you're going to point to places like Canada, etc, as prime examples of how "wonderful" socialized health care is then you're going to have to explain away the fact that getting simple procedures done like MRI's, which can be done on the spot here in the US, often take 3+ months to get an appointment for and how droves of well-off canadians will take their serious health matters to the US?
Would we like to save everyone, yes. Can we, no. Is government the fix for people with insufficient health coverage, no.
In addition, if you think socialized healthcare is "cheap", you're wildly mistaken. The taxation rate for healthcare in the socialized countries is ridiculous.
Most people working in government are there because they are not valuable commodities in the private sector, and by virtue of that, the government run programs generally are much less efficient. Lets not give any more of our money to the less accomplished people in society to handle for us than we have to. I would rather be responsible for myself. (Wait a minute...that's the big difference between human beings and liberals: responsibility)
kwyckemynd00
Registered User
If you throw out ridiculous slogans without providing anything of substance to back your "positions", you are probably a liberal democrat.
thesinner
Recovering AXoholic
There's only one being that I can think of with the knowledge and strength to keep any number of people orderly without overlooking/neglecting other factors; however, the being I'm thinking of is omnipotent. Until this changes, any government or concept of government you'll ever be exposed to is going to be less than perfect, and that's a fact you're just going to have to accept.