My story (warning LONG POST)
I am writing this more for me, as I have gone from almost a year ago looking like this:
To now looking like this:
View attachment 47391
Sadly, not much difference and my body comp is not much better. I’m up a little in weight about 5lbs, but that’s probably a fat/LBM ratio of 50:50. Not very impressive. Seeing all that I have done to enhance my physique over the last two years it seems as though my “young” years in bodybuilding have ended.
Lets start all the way back in elementary. Around the age of 11 I was diagnosed with some odd phenomenon where one of my testies just stopped growing. Just stopped. It didn’t die, it just ceased all functionality. So I didn’t have to get it removed, it would just never get any bigger, be of any use, etc. Now being 11 I had no idea what this meant other than my balls weren’t gonna be even. I had the choice to get surgery to take it out or to just let it be. I chose the later… being 11 and going into some surgery for my nuts was not going to happen. I didn’t want to miss out on summer fun lol.
Effect: Now I donno if this mattered really, as I still was able to mature and become a full fledged male. Read up online and found that this, while rare, has not hindered anyone from becoming a man has me wondering exactly HOW I was able to get all my hormones in order to become a man… With all the stuff I know now does this basically mean my leydig cells are halved and I am able to create a “balance” in my body hormonally through other pathways? Do I have better aromatase control? I doubt it I was overweight every since 1st grade…
Cause: I am pretty sure this has to do with my mom’s love for feeding me tasteless soy products, and white rice. My dinner when I was little was Tofu, natto, and some miso soup. All with rice. Also, once I was able to drink juice I was given juice whenever I wanted it. Estrogen promoting substances plus high fructose consumption = not a very healthy male. While I could have just been predisposed to this I will never know, and I doubt anyone will but I guess I am not upset about it, just kinda irritated that nothing was done or asked when I went to the doctor about the cause of this problem.
Fast forward to HS.
In HS, if I have a pic I’ll post it. Everyday of my high school life I remember popping two Extra Strength Tylenols because my mom said it was good for my headaches. I’d cycle in Aspirin whenever the headache would become “sharp”. Then I’d eat something for breakfast, usually some cereal in water, many days I wouldn’t eat anything at all. Get to school, buy a coke from the vending machine and start my day. I was gifted with brains so being the last picked for sports was excusable. My mom always told me I was smart so I couldn’t be athletic too. That’s just how it was. Lunch would either be nachos, or whatever they had in the café. In Hawaii the cafeteria is a little different than what I’ve seen on TV of High Schools so I will elaborate on what lunch was. It cost a dollar and was pretty much standard; one main dish, fruit, veggie, bread, milk. Very small portioned. After that my next meal would be dinner. Usually 1-2 cups of rice with some kind of meat and 1-3 cups of juice, depending on how thirsty I was. Oh and some days I would skip lunch and just get some coke. Now you can imagine how screwed up I must have been knowing all I know now. Meh. I am saddened by all the gains I could have had if I knew what I know now and just started to train… haha.
Effect: Well I imagine my liver must have been SHOT from non stop use of Tylenol, and aspirin. Plus the extra crap of pretty much processed sugar/fructose, and the horrible nutrition. Oh, and snacks.. I would eat snacks all the time. This seriously hurt my already hurting physique due to only having one testi working. Though I still somehow made it out a man on the other end. No gyno, no estrogenic sides etc. Lucky, as one of my friends who was a little overweight during HS has gyno he cant get rid of. I seriously think this is where my natural limit is set. I don’t think I can get much more LBM than I was at my max weight of 260lbs. Even if I was 40% bf I would have still had 156lbs of LBM… Which is not far off what my estimated LBM is now… maybe 8lbs more?
Cause: No info, no one to guide me, excuses.
Picture:
View attachment 47392
Lastly, lets go to college. College was a long experience for me. Lived at home mostly and didn’t do too much of the college lifestyle stuff. I worked, had family stuff (My parents got divorced when I was a Junior in HS so I had to help my mom out a lot). Worked out 3-4 times a week, got into basketball, tennis. Still while I was above average at the gym I was never anything of awe. While trying a variety of diets, workouts, etc. Nothing worked once I hit the sticking point of around 210. I got down to 200 following some rapid fat loss diet or something, but I also felt like crap and didn’t have any energy to play tennis, or even live…. Still no abs (now I got some as you can see in the pics… nothing special though). During this time I probably created so much cortisol and blasted. I’d workout fasted, then go straight to tennis. Have a protein shake, hit class, workout again, then hit tennis again, eat some dinner. Pass out. Pretty much that was my college life. Sadly… No improvement in body comp. But during this time I was still not paying attn to anything online. Didn’t ask anyone for advice or anything on training/diet, I just went with what was going on. It worked, or so I thought.
Then about in around 2008 I started bleeding from my belly button…. I found I had an umbilical hernia… crap… BUT, instead of doing anything about it… I just played on it. I didn’t want to get fat! So I went on an even lower cal diet because I obviously couldn’t workout as hard. Healed up my hernia after about 6 months or so, though I assume it was because during this time I completely eliminated wheat. Basically, I told myself “If Imma eat carbs it’s either a Jamba Juice or a some brown rice with my meat meal”. Physique goals not met, still barely above average in the gym… meh.
Effect: Well I got from 260 in HS to around a solid 230 when I graduated. Then hit around 210 or so in college and got stuck there. Over all I guess better insulin sensitivity and better body comp.
Cause: Gym, wanted to be athletic, didn’t want to have to shop in the big and tall section and pay more for clothes lol.
Now the year is 2009. Going to Japan in August. When getting to Japan I was able to make friends relatively quickly with another Teacher who was from Hawaii but had been up in Japan for over 5 years. Training BJJ, and lifting. Fortunately, he had some exp with AAS and advised I run a cycle. Unfortunately, no bashing him, I doubt he let me get to my true potential due to his competitive nature, or perhaps he was telling me stuff but I was too stubborn to listen. Now thinking back on it, I was probably too stubborn to take his advice. He always told me “Matt, cortisol is your #1 enemy. That’s all.” My hdrol cycle was amazing. Like I said before I went from a bench of 225X3-5 to 335X4 in 6 weeks. I took my squat from 225X5 to 395X5. Deadlift from 135X10, to 315X5. All in 6 weeks. I was shocked. Happy, wasn’t “Cut” but I noticed some recomp while just focusing on keeping my over all cals high and drinking a couple protein shakes a day. I could eat, no problem with eating. Then… I did the dumbest thing ever for PCT…. I cut… And not only did I cut, I upped the volume of my workouts. While I don’t remember my exact numbers my cut probably brought me back down to pre cycle weights. Which IMO is weaker because I didn’t have proper programming prior to coming to Japan, hell I didn’t even know what that meant until this year.
In 2010, I got on the scivation diet, followed it to the T. In 3 months I got in the best shape of my life, but still I could not get leaner… The pic up there is of me at the end of my cut. I was nearing 80kgs.. .and my muscle to fat ratio was getting worse…someplace I didn’t want to be. That pic was of me @ 85kgs or so and when I was at 80kgs I looked worse…. Hell I workout so I can look good naked AND be able to eat something once in a while. I don’t want to starve myself all the time. So in fear of losing all my muscle, and not being able to enjoy food I tried to turn the tables around and bulk. I thought, this time I’ll do it right, good food, good timing, and volume training. Sadly… when I say volume I meant volume. I read Arnolds 2 a day rotation of 3 days on 1 day off… Legs every morning… Well I’ll tell you one thing.. I don’t recover THAT fast… worked till my hernia exploded again. That was March. Took a break and did wendler 531 just to keep strength up… but man… My numbers were so sad. Got married in July, so during that time had my mom and uncle up and took a week off the gym. The day I got back I decided to ME dead lifts…. Pulled my back. My numbers on deadlift are just coming around now… 4 months later… as you can see this is a very badly planned training and diet cycle. While I’m pretty sure I’ve dieted off all my PH gains from Hdrol I am almost certain I am going to need another cycle to get to where I wanna be. Why? Because mentally… I’m weak lol. Also, I tend to over do it when I diet. I’ve done 2days off one day on with FOOD. While a full hormonal panel is probably in order, along with a visit to the therapist about my body image issues, in Japan this is just not going to happen.
Now why am I doing all this?
Well after being training/diet ADD for around 2 years I figure I need to write everything down. Keep tabs on myself because I tend to get lost in the moment, in the article, in the training programs, in all the information out there.
This is not only a reminder to me to show me that I can’t be doing dumb stuff like this (hell ups and downs throughout this whole time amounted to … almost nothing??? A learning experience basically, a good one, but I can’t be making these mistakes again! Haha). I hope I can help anyone else, not by providing data on health, nutrition, or training as I’m not someone you should be looking to for advice, but as someone who is not a genetic freak getting it done, doing what needs to be done and sticking to something to reach his goals.
Good luck to us all, and if you read this all then reps to you. I’m typing this in word and I am on page 3 lol.
-Matt
