I work with a lady here at my company. She see's how I prep all my own meals and eat very clean, no junk. If I am ever nice enough to go out and grab her lunch for her cause its cold out and make a comment on her food, she gets extremely defensive. The comments are words such as " So how is your food today? Is it good?"
Just trying to make conversation with her and she goes "Extremely healthy! Yeah."
WTF is her problem? I just can't stand it.
When she learned I was into bodybuilding she preached to me how protein powder kills people cause she read about a girl who died from it. Unreal.
Well first off STOP GETTING HER FOOD! She doesn't appreciate it, and is rude to you so don't offer anymore. If she wants to know why then tell her the truth. You have only been nice to her and never judged her for her food choices but her responses toward small talk regarding the food you brought to her were rude and dismissive and you just don't have time for pettiness.
Secondly I don't really think it any more fair to try and generalize that most people outside of fitness think or feel anything any more than I think it would be fair for them to assume we are all egotistical. The ones that make noise are the ones who feel this way. The majority are silent or don't care enough for it to matter. In other words, there will always be haters, and haters gonna hate, but just because they are the louder doesn't make them the majority.
Ive noticed that many people who do not workout and have no interest in the gym find that when a person posts a progress pic on social media, its as if they get offended by it. These people are usually out of shape individuals. Post a progress pic up on social media and if you get positive feedback its more than likely going to come from a fellow lifter/bodybuilder/gym rat etc. Does this basically explain that the reason for this is because non workout people feel that gym guys and girls are judgemental and seeing pics posted by them is like them rubbing it in that the non workout people are fat ****ers?
Thoughts?
Again, asking us to think for others when their are 7 billion people with 7 billion different minds and personalities... trying to lump them into a mindset that allows you to dismiss their opinion based on a generalization is an exercise to validate to yourself that you are on the side of right. In the end each person has their reasons. You want to know why, you have a person right there that you could ask why she has that attitude. Then you aren't speculating. Think of how many reasons why you might like to post progress or flex pics. Could be you are narcissistic, could be you are extremely insecure and need validation. Could be that you just love what you have accomplished are proud of it and want to share it with the world. Could be a way to be accountable. Could be you just really enjoy the attention it gives you. I am sure you get the point.
There are just as many reasons why they might think we are douche like. Bottom line is they see it as an imbalance in what they prioritize as important, or what behavior is normal TO THEM and the fact you prioritize these things is foreign in nature to them. How they deal with it is also going to be different. Some may be vocal some may laugh, some may compliment or applaud, and some may get an attitude or be negative to us.
Either way asking a bunch of people to come up, or agree with reasons why it must be some sort of insecrurity, or shortcoming and not just being wired different and having different personalities is an attempt to put things on an entire group when we can not know the individuals reasons is no different then them as people saying or having the impression we are all egotistical. If you don't like it coming our way... then you shouldn't want to put that on them either.
There is nothing wrong with progress photos, but why does one need to post pictures of themselves flexing online for others to see? If one is posting those progress photos on a site like this, I get it, but social media, I really don't see the point. Unless the entire following is bodybuilding/fitness related.
I am a teacher, one subject I teach is sociology. I think this topic is not just related to bodybuilding or gym folks, but to everyone in society. I am in shape and do not post pictures, except one avatar, because I do not feel the need too. Personally, I think our society is full narcissistic individuals. I don't care if the person is in shape, out of shape, posting selfies, or posting group photos, there is no need, in my opinion to post pictures of oneself on a daily or bi-daily basis. Again, personal opinion here, but I think society as a whole is full of narcissistic people and social media is the cause of that.
EDIT - I think that people in general now feel as though they need to “prove” (maybe the wrong word) as to what they are doing in today’s society. There is no need to post on social media where one is or take pictures of everything where ever one is. People focus too much on posting about their experience versus just enjoying it.
You are absolutely correct, one does not need to post pictures of themselves posing or flexing online. One doesn't need to post in online forums. One doesn't need to ride bicycles, or to celebrate birthdays. One doesn't need to eat foods they enjoy, or feel the touch of a woman. One doesn't need an education or to be able to read and write for that matter. One doesn't need to do anything they enjoy... Life would suck pretty damn bad if we only did what was needed...
The things that bring value to life are those things that bring us joy. Those things bring them joy... don't be a killjoy just because it doesn't give you joy to do so.
I would also have to say that we can not pin this phenomenon on social media in anyway. Sure it is more pervasive yes, the platform is now bigger. However, the same guys posting flexing pics online are the same guys who typically don't have a shirt on in public or are always wearing a tanktop. I know because that is me! Has always been that way... I have been flexing since I was 5, I was aware of my muscle and liked it. I also became aware others liked muscles too and when i showed them off I got positive feedback. It is a great symbiotic relationship. I am a bit of an exhibitionist, it is in my nature and I am wired that way. Why I don't know... but it has always been that way and I am sure is the case for most people like that.
There is not one negative thing about a person posting up pictures of themselves they are proud of. Assuming something negative about that person because they value that aspect of their life is definitely negative though. Just let people be themselves... you aren't wired that way and that is awesome for you. I can see you as the head down in a hoodie with headphones on in the gym. Those guys typically aren't too impressed with those who prefer to exhibit their physiques. I often see them referred to as douches by that type. To that I say no, just different, and different motivations that they don't understand because they don't motivate them...
I won't lie, Vanity is probably one of my biggest factors for working out. I want to look good. I appreciate the side effects of being healthy but in the end I just really want to be big, impressive, and strong. When I am those things, I am going to show my hard work and enjoy it. Enjoy it for myself because I love the way I look when in shape. I love the mirror when i am in shape. I love my reflection in windows when I am in shape. I love it when other people love it too!!! I love getting compliments, and I love getting support from those with similar goals.
So you are correct, there is no need for me or anyone to do any of this. More importantly there is ZERO reasons why I should not... they bring me joy and if it bothers you it has to do with how you are wired and whether you choose to treat it as inconsequential, or give it the power be become a personal hang up that annoys you. I would say just ignore it rather than being annoyed or sinking to becoming judgmental...
