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The Charmin Toilet Paper Commercials... With Those Bears.

Those bears are filthy...and I never quite understood what absorbency and people-paper have to do with one another. It's not like I'm sopping up a flood back there.
 
I mean, bears don't even use toilet paper.

And the newest ad I've seen, they show the bear with freaking dingleberries. I don't need to see that. Stuff creeps me out more than the Snuggle Bear (totally looks like it eats children).
 
The bear is sort of a methaphor for the softness of the paper. soft cuddly bears (teddy bears). The delivery may need to be researched.
 
The bear is sort of a methaphor for the softness of the paper. soft cuddly bears (teddy bears). The delivery may need to be researched.

Theodore Roosevelt's presidential campaign committee must've been smoking some crazy assed drugs (this is where the term "Teddy Bear" was derived, in case you don't see the connection). If you ever tried to snuggle or spoon with a bear, that sucker would maul you to death in a heartbeat. It would later **** you out, and never once think about wiping, let alone using Charmin Ultra. :bandit:
 
Teddy was a big nature guy. I'm sure he fornicated with many-a-bear, and probably came across a snuggly one once in a while...Perhaps more estrogen than the average bear.
 
Yeah, he was a person named Theodore that you didn't want to mess with. I wouldn't be surprised if he put a bear into submission and forced it to perform fellatio (without biting); afterall, he pen is supposedly mightier than any sword. ;) ;) I wonder if bears spit or swallow. :think:
 
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