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Some good French jokes

CDB

Registered User
Q. How do you say "Give me liberty or give me death!" in French?
A. I give up.


Q. How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris?
A. Nobody knows. It's never been tried.


Q. What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?
A. The French Army.


Q. Why was the Chunnel built under the English Channel?
A. So the French government could to flee to London.


Q: Did you hear about the new French tanks?
A: They have 5 gears...4 in reverse, and one forward gear just in case they're attacked from behind!


Q: Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney?
A: Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.


Q: Why do they have trees in Paris?
A: So the Germans can march in the shade instead of the sun


Q: Why is good to be French?
A: You can surrender at the beginning of the war, and US will win it for you.


Q: What is the first thing you are taught when joining the French army?
A: To say "I surrender" in German




Q: Why was Jesus not born in France?
A: Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
Q: Did you hear about France's new weapons contracts?
A: They gave one to Ace Hardware to produce 250,000 wood sticks...they are still looking for a company to produce 250,000 little white flags.


Q: Where are the brave French soldiers buried?
A: There aren't any so they had to bury some of ours on their soil.
 
Yeah bro, you've had some amazing avatars lately.

Maybe you'd like to give Methyl1 some pointers? :lol:
 
bda55 said:
I guess those jokes are hilarious if you live in the US :rolleyes:
I really don't mind the French that much. They have a different view of their national interests than we do and they're entitled to it. They could just be a bit more polite about it given past circumstances and alliances, where we've both helped each other.
 
BigP0ppa3 said:
Yeah bro, you've had some amazing avatars lately.

Maybe you'd like to give Methyl1 some pointers? :lol:
I try and find a new one every so often and change them up. Makes the boards a bit of a nicer place. I actually like Methyl1's avatars. I'm generally a fan of anything visually disturbing, though real world violence doesn't sit well with me. No need for most of it.
 
That girls name is Caprice, I've jer.. Read many issues of mens mags with her in them.. :thumbsup:
 
LOL @ Pete

P.S. Can you share those magazines with me? Oh, ok, I just got it. NO, please keep 'em to yourself

And about French jokes... That's just mean. But funny as hell. LOL
 
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