Post-detox Bulk Up

DaveyCrockett

DaveyCrockett

Member
New here. First forum I've ever participated in, and a little backstory.

38 y.o. and have trained on and off since age 20. Sober on and off as well. No prior AAS use.

1 year ago, got labs done for an unrelated issue and checked testosterone levels just for fun. Total test 180. Guessing genetics and bipolar disorder (true story, Google that sh*t lol).

TRT prohibitively expensive so I start learning, sourcing, and blasting. Never seen or felt anything like it. Abused it, ate like sh*t, and started the recreational drugs again.

Kicked the drugs almost 3 months ago. Bedridden for 3 weeks and no training/AAS/PCT for a month.

Started training again, and light cycle as follows....
140mg test e
140mg deca
70mg tren e
Weekly doses
20mg dbol daily
DIET ON POINT


3 pics. One is pre AAS, second is post detox, and third is 6 weeks into cycle. I am up 12 lbs. since start.

Phasing out dbol this week, continuing rest for a few more. I have all the in between pics as well. Also, im out in the woods and all I own are a few sets of dumbbells and a slant bar 🤣.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to participating here. Thanks.

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Thanks. The first pic is a year old tho, pre AAS. But 2 and 3 are just 6 weeks apart. Funny, you know, I've used (abused) 5-7 times as much gear per week, but ate like crap and lifted half-assed. I put in an hour plus every day now and eat a LOT of brown rice and chicken breast lol....this is so much more rewarding than the "heavy" cycles
 
Tried to dig up back pics from beginning of cycle but alas, those never made it to the cloud and died with my crap Moto phone. So I guess I'll start with today's....BTW diet always includes 150+g protein and I have completely cut processed sugar except for my morning coffee. Only sides so far are an hour less sleep and sweaty sheets. Oh, and general feelings of awesomeness lol.
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And legs. They were pretty rough after detox but I'm hittin' em on leg days til I puke sometimes....I'll update with any changes, sides, etc as they occur as well as progress by the week. Invalid Link Removed
 
Pushing through today. No energy. It's hard to tell sometimes if it's a normal fluctuation or if I need to mash some carbs, or if my bipolar has decided to drop me into the sh*tter for a while....

Farmer carries today, dumbbell bent over rows, and rear delt work.

All drop sets, all the time. If I'm not screaming in pain, I feel cheated lol....
 
Chest and arms day. Again, drop sets for all....

Flat dumbbell press
50x35 (to see where I'm at)
50x10/30x8/20x7 drop
50x8/30x7/20x6 drop
....left shoulder is tweaked today....
Steep incline dumbbell press
50x6/30x5/20x5 drop
50x5/30x3 and done....at this point I stop cuz of the shoulder.

Job interview today, hopefully I'll be able to buy some new equipment as I feel my chest progression has stalled.

Dropped dbol, Test/Deca/Tren up to 200/200/100 a week....
 
Well, second workout yesterday was preacher curls, drop sets of course. Leaned over to grab the dumbbell (it was on the floor in front of my preacher setup) and had to reach down a little further than I thought. Ribs pressed against the padding an wood and.....CRACK I feel one give. I scream which wakes my son up... He comes out of the room as asks what body part I just broke 😆

Today is leg day, and I tried to start my usual goblet squats with the 50 lb...normally I get 40 in on the first set. Stopped at 10 from the pain.

Bummer.
 
Well, got the job I interviewed and I start tomorrow. Can't wait to buy some more equipment.

Going to attempt farmer carries and shrugs in the morning, rib permitting.

Also, got my gram of anastrozole in and made a 2.7mg/ml solution with grain alcohol....needed it for developing gyno. Also wanted to try out my Test Acetate.

Will report how morning workout goes.
 
Well......I'm the only normal sized guy at a job full of tiny ladies and a tiny man, so they figured out what I'm good for quickly yesterday. I was hurting so bad I skipped the workout but pinned 2ml of Ace and 1ml of my regular to try and get something going today thru the weekend.

This morning not so sore. Out there gettin' it with farmer carries and shrugs, various delt raises.....rib makes an audible pop like knuckles cracking in my torso.

Not sure yet whether that was good or bad. Hurts a little more but it could be better in the long run.

For sure, if I made it worse I'll take a couple days off training.

I mean it. I really do. 😆
 
Receiving/stocking at a grocery store thats half a mile away from my house. Pays less than my last job but there is literally zero stress, and plenty exercise. Super healthy for me as I bounce back from the bipolar/substance abuse.....plus the girls in the meat market seem very.....friendly 😉
 
So......think I may have gone a little high on the Arimidex. Had zero energy today after 7 hours sleep. Every part of me is weak. Went ahead with a leg workout, goblet squats with a 25 lb dumbbell to give rib a break, but could only manage 35 reps which is the same I do as when a use a 50 lb.

And I've taken 3 naps. Feels gross. Like flipping gross. No more adex, bumping up the Test Ace in a couple days to expedite the process if necessary. Hopefully estrogen rebound will occur shortly as I've only taken it twice since I got it on Wednesday.
 
Well, screw it, went ahead and hit the bench anyway. Whaddya know, new PR for dumbbell press, 50x38 reps. Could only manage one drop set tho before the rib quit on me. Up 2 lbs since initial post sitting at 186 in the morning now. Bodyfat is not completely appalling. I like it a bit lower cuz it hides my old gyno but I think the abs are on their way back in. Couldnt do any standard poses cuz of rib, but skipping workouts was driving me nuts.Invalid Link Removed
Hoping estro will climb back up a little.....in the meantime maybe another nap lol
 
Bad news, new friends. Pain today after work. Throwing around heavy stuff at work today made workout impossible. I don't know when I'll be able to hit upper body again. Legs only for a while. Sucks man, I'm hoping it only lasts a couple weeks....
 
Ok so I'm gonna close this one out. Injury may have me sidined Here is the a comparison pose from my initial one roughly 8 weeks ago. I believe I was sitting at 186 lbs which would've been a 14 lb gain. Thanks for all your feedback guys, I'll be starting a new thread in cycle logs once I'm able to train again.Invalid Link Removed
 
Matthersby said:
In late, but in here now bro.
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Appreciate it, man. I'm bummed because I wanted to see just how far I could get on a bulk on what I considered a low amount of gear. After I dropped dbol I went 200/200/100 test/deca/tren with an extra 1-200 of test Ace to kinda replace the dbol kick. Learned the following:

A) 2 lb gain per week was possible....
B) on point diet was absolutely critical
C) Had to get creative with angles and drop sets about halfway in. Workout duration also doubled as cycle continued

I'm chilling for now, saving up for some good raws. Next one's gonna be a beast, I can feel it.
 
Don’t know if we’ve talked about this yet, but I’m several years sober, drinking was the most damaging.
But had a pretty bad opiate problem back in 2009 that pretty much destroyed a career, a marriage, and several hundred thousand in assets. Burned it all to the ground and ended up withdrawing from 75/day methadone cold turkey in rehab. There’s a grip of guys here same or similar situations
 
I know you'd mentioned it in passing but I didn't know the details. I ran 100g a day of kratom for a couple years and drank like a fish....then I started up the Schedule I fat burners and really sh*t the bed. Other than having to rebuild my life from the ground up, the only permanent damage seems to be that I made my bipolar disorder exponentially worse. But I'm sure glad I found this forum and I'm glad there's folks like me here.
 
Matthersby said:
Don’t know if we’ve talked about this yet, but I’m several years sober, drinking was the most damaging.
But had a pretty bad opiate problem back in 2009 that pretty much destroyed a career, a marriage, and several hundred thousand in assets. Burned it all to the ground and ended up withdrawing from 75/day methadone cold turkey in rehab. There’s a grip of guys here same or similar situations
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That’s some really heavy **** man. Have you came out of it unharmed or would you say there are still demons there??
 
Definitely not. I truly feel like I've been given a second chance here. And I'm scared of going back. It was killing me and I didn't care.

I'm scared enough that I go to meetings, support groups, a therapist too lol. At this point in my life I work, sleep, lift (finally got a couple sets of curls in today), and do sober stuff with sober people. I noticed early on that lifting gave me goals I could work toward as well as endorphins that filled a hole in my brain chemistry.

I'm not pretentious or judgemental and I understand that a lot of people can use recreational drugs safely. I'm tired of hurting people I love and Im tired of rebuilding my life and dammit im tired of being locked up too. That's what that life gets me.
 
DaveyCrockett said:
Definitely not. I truly feel like I've been given a second chance here. And I'm scared of going back. It was killing me and I didn't care.

I'm scared enough that I go to meetings, support groups, a therapist too lol. At this point in my life I work, sleep, lift (finally got a couple sets of curls in today), and do sober stuff with sober people. I noticed early on that lifting gave me goals I could work toward as well as endorphins that filled a hole in my brain chemistry.

I'm not pretentious or judgemental and I understand that a lot of people can use recreational drugs safely. I'm tired of hurting people I love and Im tired of rebuilding my life and dammit im tired of being locked up too. That's what that life gets me.
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if it were easy everyone could do it....I've been around AA/NA for many years and the amount of people who relapse is really sad.

I wish you well and hope you are among the few who succeed in long term sobriety. I feel that my sobriety is my greatest achievement.
 
Sheriff Morri said:
That’s some really heavy **** man. Have you came out of it unharmed or would you say there are still demons there??
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I love my life now. I just wake up every day and do my best to work for my kids and my girl and her kids. It’s worked for years so I’m not worried.
But I can assure you, you may be living the sober life every day, but your addiction is out in the parking lot doing push-ups, getting ready to mess your world up.
 
DaveyCrockett said:
Definitely not. I truly feel like I've been given a second chance here. And I'm scared of going back. It was killing me and I didn't care.

I'm scared enough that I go to meetings, support groups, a therapist too lol. At this point in my life I work, sleep, lift (finally got a couple sets of curls in today), and do sober stuff with sober people. I noticed early on that lifting gave me goals I could work toward as well as endorphins that filled a hole in my brain chemistry.

I'm not pretentious or judgemental and I understand that a lot of people can use recreational drugs safely. I'm tired of hurting people I love and Im tired of rebuilding my life and dammit im tired of being locked up too. That's what that life gets me.
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Somewhere in the process there’s some magic. For me it’s acts of service. It’s worked so well I just wake up daily and ask to be selfless. And if I go to sleep at night and I’ve accomplished that, it’s a day I didn’t once think about drinking. For others it may be sharing, or amends. Or whatever but NA/AA work so Ill never say they don’t. I took what I learned there and apply it daily. There might be a day where I’m gonna need to hit meetings every day.. don’t know but I’m not giving up what I’ve got today for a substance ever again.
 
Matthersby said:
Somewhere in the process there’s some magic. For me it’s acts of service. It’s worked so well I just wake up daily and ask to be selfless. And if I go to sleep at night and I’ve accomplished that, it’s a day I didn’t once think about drinking. For others it may be sharing, or amends. Or whatever but NA/AA work so Ill never say they don’t. I took what I learned there and apply it daily. There might be a day where I’m gonna need to hit meetings every day.. don’t know but I’m not giving up what I’ve got today for a substance ever again.
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Right now, I'm focusing on consistency. Consistent meetings, spending time with the kids, doing the housework (single dad as GF doesn't live with me), etc.

There is meaning to be found, for me, in becoming a better person. The program is great for that, it's like a road map for that purpose.

I was sharing the other day though, how the ups and downs have really become more apparent in my life. Bipolar disorder doesn't help that either. But I have to give myself a break and realize that every day is not going to have this huge spiritual a ha moment.... Some days the victory is simply not drinking or using, and handling my business as a man no matter how I crappy I feel that day. Life is trending toward better, not every day is a new spiritual PR lol
 
the 12 step program is not only a guide to sobriety it is a roadmap for a better life...they should offer a 12 step program in high school, would teach kids how to be better people!!!
 
thebigt said:
the 12 step program is not only a guide to sobriety it is a roadmap for a better life...they should offer a 12 step program in high school, would teach kids how to be better people!!!
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I try to teach my kids a modified version practicing accountability, selflessness and determination.
Nothing pisses me off more than hearing an addict took his/her own life.
You fucking coward. You fight this until the death even if you fail 364 days a year, you got one day to be better than your disease and give your family and friends the person they want and not the addict. My kids deserved me to fight even if I relapsed 100 times, I fought until I figured it out and they get the dad they deserve now. Best feeling ever.
 
Matthersby said:
I try to teach my kids a modified version practicing accountability, selflessness and determination.
Nothing pisses me off more than hearing an addict took his/her own life.
You fucking coward. You fight this until the death even if you fail 364 days a year, you got one day to be better than your disease and give your family and friends the person they want and not the addict. My kids deserved me to fight even if I relapsed 100 times, I fought until I figured it out and they get the dad they deserve now. Best feeling ever.
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You know it's funny, no matter how down and out a drunk/dope fiend I was, I've always been my children's hero. Children pay attention very closely to everything we do even if they don't talk about it with us. What an amazing example to set, dropping the bad habits and choosing to live a principled, meaningful life.
 
DaveyCrockett said:
You know it's funny, no matter how down and out a drunk/dope fiend I was, I've always been my children's hero. Children pay attention very closely to everything we do even if they don't talk about it with us. What an amazing example to set, dropping the bad habits and choosing to live a principled, meaningful life.
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My kids were about fed up but wouldn’t give up on me.
I’ve never been closer to them in their lives. They couldn’t even wait to give me Father’s Day presents. Every year I’ve been sober I’ve been able to give them more and more, pay for sports, buy them new shoes, get them haircuts, get them everything they could ever need, take them to places their mom will never be able to. We decided last week we were taking all kids to Hawaii next March and looked at VRBOs. I wouldn’t trade this for anything. Even when I have a panic attack and desperately need something to calm me down, I think of what I’m able to do for my kids and drink some Kava tea and move on with my life. I wish I could give what I’ve got to every addict out there and show them there’s hope. Invalid Link RemovedInvalid Link Removed
They always get me Deadpool stuff.
 
Matthersby said:
My kids were about fed up but wouldn’t give up on me.
I’ve never been closer to them in their lives. They couldn’t even wait to give me Father’s Day presents. Every year I’ve been sober I’ve been able to give them more and more, pay for sports, buy them new shoes, get them haircuts, get them everything they could ever need, take them to places their mom will never be able to. We decided last week we were taking all kids to Hawaii next March and looked at VRBOs. I wouldn’t trade this for anything. Even when I have a panic attack and desperately need something to calm me down, I think of what I’m able to do for my kids and drink some Kava tea and move on with my life. I wish I could give what I’ve got to every addict out there and show them there’s hope. Invalid Link RemovedInvalid Link Removed
They always get me Deadpool stuff.
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it keeps getting better!!! grandkids are the best dope ever, lol.
 
Matthersby said:
My kids were about fed up but wouldn’t give up on me.
I’ve never been closer to them in their lives. They couldn’t even wait to give me Father’s Day presents. Every year I’ve been sober I’ve been able to give them more and more, pay for sports, buy them new shoes, get them haircuts, get them everything they could ever need, take them to places their mom will never be able to. We decided last week we were taking all kids to Hawaii next March and looked at VRBOs. I wouldn’t trade this for anything. Even when I have a panic attack and desperately need something to calm me down, I think of what I’m able to do for my kids and drink some Kava tea and move on with my life. I wish I could give what I’ve got to every addict out there and show them there’s hope. Invalid Link RemovedInvalid Link Removed
They always get me Deadpool stuff.
Click to expand...
Right now my 16 year old is whipping up some chicken fried rice for dad's special Father's Day Meal 😁
 
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