Meds only made me worse. The only reason I'm sick is I've been poisoned and grown in bad soil (society). I fight to live in an environment not created by or for me, nor to really benefit me in any way that would come as natural gratification or equate to happiness of any sort. I can't afford the dream that we are programmed to seek out relentlessly and most often unlikely and hopeless, yet I'm forced to live under expectations and being judged by those who do, and also most likely not acquire it as well. I find myself as I get older increasingly become more anti social and unable to connect or communicate on a real humanly emotional level with others. Everyone seems to be wearing a mask to me and I never expect a "real" response as don't treat them or the conversations I have with these people as reality. I feel I'm talking to robots, non stop, and I always get the programmed response. So much so at times I can answer my own questions before I think to ask. I'm simply trying to fake it and make conversation so I'm not found out that I know the truth only to be chastised and called an outcast. I call em as I see them and its not exceptable to the masses but i am also willing more so now then ever to except criticism about my own behavior..... I'm bat shît crazy and that's how god made me!
"....human beings are the only creatures on earth who claim a god..... And the only living thing who behaves as if they havent got one..."