Mental destruction

Mattinde520

New member
At 16 when my voice was cracking I and my friends jumped right into prohormones. I was working out since 14 and trained primarily for baseball and to get the girls. My buds didn't tell me anything about Pct or side affects. I started with a cycle of methl 1 d and at the time it came with HGH. Working out 5 days a week and eating like a horse I made amazing gains in strength and my athletic performance increased tenfold. I've always been an all star athlete but now I really stood out. Loved the results so much I did another 4 week cycle right after the first, no break. Not much gains this time and plateaud at the gym. People noticed my size and mental attitude and the women couldn't stay away. Then one day I went to school and it seemed all my friends didn't give a **** about me. I started losing size, grades slided downhill and my wit and humor was gone. Before the 'roids' I was popular; witty & extremely outgoing. So I took another cycle, no results. Ever since then I've spiraled downhill, thought I was God, joined the marines in pursuit of world domination but got discharged due to mental incompetency. I'm extremely unmotivated, diagnosed with schizophrenia and basically just existing. I'm now 22 and have made a little progress but still unconfident and depressed. Did I trash my endocrine system completely? I get blood work done Friday and assume it will tell all. Is TRT my only option at this point? All Supps are pointless and have been on every anti depressant and antipsychotic on the market. Any educated impute would be nice, Thanks
 
You're condition did not come from pro hormone use. Unfortunately you have been diagnosed with schizophrenia, which commonly manifests in men in their early twenties.
My grandmother had schizophrenia, so I know a little bit about it. The good news is it is treatable. You can live a great and happy life. However you must seek treatment from a psychiatrist. Schizophrenia must be treated with medication. No amount of eating right and training and supplements can get your brain chemistry right. Those things will benefit your life in other ways, but you must treat your condition under the supervision of a psychiatrist.
Good luck.
Peace
 
Their is a good chance you became permanently 'shutdown' if what you said is true about the cycle you ran and how you ran them at that fragile age. I think TRT will definitely be a better option at this point to take instead of any anti-depressants or such which can have their own side effects as well, TRT would be the smartest thing to do IMHO if I was in your shoes. Just my .02 cents
 
Thank you for the concern but i no longer have schizophrenia. I had schizophrenic symptoms and i know all about the disease and trust me i dont have it. I am convinced it is from Low T. I have been taking PES Erase which lowers my estrogen and cortisol and i feel pretty damn "normal". I know it wont boost my T levels to a normal range but i does help and brings my wit and humor, sensitivity, anger, focus, ect. all back to a functional level. Assuming that, IMO i think raising my test back to normal ranges would make me a productive person once again. Unfortunately it says only to take Erase for 8 weeks at a time and then 4 weeks off, so im at the end and thats why i went to the doc. If you really study schizophrenia you will realize thats not what im dealing with. Low T and schizo have basically the same symptoms but i aint no Hitler! Now that guy was a real paranoid schizophrenic! Thanks for the input
 
Mattinde520 said:
Thank you for the concern but i no longer have schizophrenia. I had schizophrenic symptoms and i know all about the disease and trust me i dont have it. I am convinced it is from Low T. I have been taking PES Erase which lowers my estrogen and cortisol and i feel pretty damn "normal". I know it wont boost my T levels to a normal range but i does help and brings my wit and humor, sensitivity, anger, focus, ect. all back to a functional level. Assuming that, IMO i think raising my test back to normal ranges would make me a productive person once again. Unfortunately it says only to take Erase for 8 weeks at a time and then 4 weeks off, so im at the end and thats why i went to the doc. If you really study schizophrenia you will realize thats not what im dealing with. Low T and schizo have basically the same symptoms but i aint no Hitler! Now that guy was a real paranoid schizophrenic! Thanks for the input
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No Problem kid, best of luck to your blood results on Friday
 
I agree Lacross. Im assuming ill be on TRT for the rest of my life but the benefits would greatly out weigh the fact that im merely existing and have no enjoyment in just about anything. I play guitar and the creative aspect of it is absolutely neccessary! Something i am incapable of at the moment. Hey, people take insulin shots everyday and dont think twice about it, its life or death for them.
 
Mattinde520 said:
I agree Lacross. Im assuming ill be on TRT for the rest of my life but the benefits would greatly out weigh the fact that im merely existing and have no enjoyment in just about anything. I play guitar and the creative aspect of it is absolutely neccessary! Something i am incapable of at the moment. Hey, people take insulin shots everyday and dont think twice about it, its life or death for them.
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Agreed, best of luck to ya
 
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