Dadof2
Active member
I would hope that the white male could get a break eventually. Something has to give.
Men's Issues
- Thread starter LG Sciences
- Start date
I would hope that the white male could get a break eventually. Something has to give.
thebigt
Legend
your point about middle eastern immigrants was very valid. this country seems to value diversity so much, that as more and more middle easterners migrate to the U.S, it seems that social and moral conduct will have to change to accommodate them. funny how the liberals who are pushing so hard to accept middle eastern values, might just be the one's who suffer. you can bet that gay and womens rights groups will be the first target of a muslimized america. vote obama!
thebigt
Legend
we are talking attitudes, legal and ethical issues.
Mo250
Member
so you're syaing they would have survived better if it was one wager?. How did the big businesses bring the salaries down ?
thebigt
Legend
30 years ago when a woman got married she stayed home and took care of the house and kids, haven't you ever seen leave it to beaver. company's had to pay a man a living wage enough to support his family on just his income. by putting women to work, now you had two incomes to support the family. with two incomes coming in company's no longer had to pay a man enough to support his family so wages have stayed stagnant while prices continue to soar. if women would have stayed home wages for men would be much higher. do you see where i am coming from? seriously when i was a boy 90% of mom's stayed home.
FcuktheFDA
Banned
I'm not even gonna bother getting involved in this discussion because I'm involved with a woman's rights group, in the Violence Intervention Program, on probation, go to anger management, etc. Long, long story, but I discuss with this professionals every week, twice per week.
Triple Cs
Member
Divorce stories like that really scare me. Furthermore, I once had a temp job working for the department of child support collections. This place was the definition of misandry. I'll never forget the happiness is one woman's voice as she described the law that makes the husband the legal father of any child born into the marriage. Paternity fraud is legal and studies show it happens 10-20% of the time (Biologically, when a female is cuckolded, she is more likely to get pregnant by the other man).
The male desire for sex is seen in our society as wrong. Women often get to manipulate men by rewarding and witholding sex.
Men should have the right to "paper abortions". A man can have a woman sign an agreement that says that she is on birth control and would get an abortion in the case of an accident. Even, if she pinholes his condom, breaks the agreement and has a baby; the guy has no case in court.
Women should have the same rights as men, but they should not be entitled to profit off relationships. Feminists were right to decry marriage. The man begs for the woman, he gives the ring, he takes part in an expensive party that is all about her. He then enters a contract where he has a 50% chance of losing half or more of his assets. Add to that the fact that most women prefer a man who makes more than they do. Pre-nups are finally becoming more acceptable, but they cost money to draft and have many limits on the conditions to be placed. In divorce, guys are often forced to pay their wife's legal fees, give up the house, pay alimony and often excessive child support. 2/3s of divorces are initiated by women. Most of for the reason of "general discontent".
In the area of relationships, guys have a huge legal disadvantage. Even if he enters into an agreement with a woman, the government can change the rules at any time to his detriment.
The male desire for sex is seen in our society as wrong. Women often get to manipulate men by rewarding and witholding sex.
Men should have the right to "paper abortions". A man can have a woman sign an agreement that says that she is on birth control and would get an abortion in the case of an accident. Even, if she pinholes his condom, breaks the agreement and has a baby; the guy has no case in court.
Women should have the same rights as men, but they should not be entitled to profit off relationships. Feminists were right to decry marriage. The man begs for the woman, he gives the ring, he takes part in an expensive party that is all about her. He then enters a contract where he has a 50% chance of losing half or more of his assets. Add to that the fact that most women prefer a man who makes more than they do. Pre-nups are finally becoming more acceptable, but they cost money to draft and have many limits on the conditions to be placed. In divorce, guys are often forced to pay their wife's legal fees, give up the house, pay alimony and often excessive child support. 2/3s of divorces are initiated by women. Most of for the reason of "general discontent".
In the area of relationships, guys have a huge legal disadvantage. Even if he enters into an agreement with a woman, the government can change the rules at any time to his detriment.
LG Sciences
Board Sponsor
Yes, and this is a valid issue. No one is taking away from the fact that women have struggles, however is it right to be extreme by saying that men have "all of the advantages" which is the bullshit I was appalled with in my first post. There are many advantages to being a female in the US and there are liabilities. However, many womens groups will continuously highlight the disadvantages to a fault.
Was your Significant Other sent to sensitivity training? Why are all of the books written on verbal abuse written by women and have an anti-male bend to them? No offense some of the moms I grew up with were WAY more abusive than the dads were to their children and verbal abuse is WAY more damaging to a child than physical abuse IMHO.
I felt good, I came across a prostate cancer "awareness" and donation program at my local grocery store. According to some people though, it is wrong to even start such a fund since men have all of the advantages...
Do you remember registering for the selective service? Were you scared like I was? I registered around the time of the first Gulf War and I for one was kind of scared and felt like I was a sort of slave. First major war since Vietnam with the worlds 4th largest army (or whatever it was). Did I know as a 19 year old that we would win overwhelmingly? Nope... Did women have to go through that? Nope...
Yes, men have all of the advantages...right? We control society...that's why we don't get ALL of the advantages do we? Don't you think being forced to serve in the military and die for something that we don't believe in to be kind of a big disadvantage? Our national security wasn't being threatened. If someone invaded the US, then fine, but Iraq to free Kuwait?
Was your Significant Other sent to sensitivity training? Why are all of the books written on verbal abuse written by women and have an anti-male bend to them? No offense some of the moms I grew up with were WAY more abusive than the dads were to their children and verbal abuse is WAY more damaging to a child than physical abuse IMHO.
I felt good, I came across a prostate cancer "awareness" and donation program at my local grocery store. According to some people though, it is wrong to even start such a fund since men have all of the advantages...
Do you remember registering for the selective service? Were you scared like I was? I registered around the time of the first Gulf War and I for one was kind of scared and felt like I was a sort of slave. First major war since Vietnam with the worlds 4th largest army (or whatever it was). Did I know as a 19 year old that we would win overwhelmingly? Nope... Did women have to go through that? Nope...
Yes, men have all of the advantages...right? We control society...that's why we don't get ALL of the advantages do we? Don't you think being forced to serve in the military and die for something that we don't believe in to be kind of a big disadvantage? Our national security wasn't being threatened. If someone invaded the US, then fine, but Iraq to free Kuwait?
thebigt
Legend
womens groups are now protesting unfair treatment of female veterans by the veterans administration. haha-why are they singling out females instead of protesting unfair treatment of all vets? the why is because all vets are getting the shaft by the va, women want preferential treatment. hell i bet a great number of homeless guys you see on the street are vietnam vets. women are very late getting to this party.
LilPsychotic
Well-known member
This is good...not to mention affirmative action. So basically, if your a white, heterosexual, law-abiding, normal male, you're screwed. This is what our society has become. Society needs do be diveeersive, unless of course you're white, then you can pound salt.
GuyverX
Well-known member
I will say this, if a man does not want children he better get a vasectomy and use condoms.
My cousin was married for about 3 years. He got married at 20. (he is now 28).
He tried to get the vasectomy when he got married but the docs turned him away.
He said he used protection up until the point his wife said that she would get the shot because they were married and she wanted it to be natural.
Now he was pretty dumb for giving in, but he did.
She got pregnant. He begged her to have an abortion but she refused.
She then divorced him.
She had triplets. He now works like 14 hours a day 6 or 7 days a week because the support takes 50% of his income.
Just to say to be on your p's and q's because after cnception he had no say.
GuyverX
Well-known member
that's just the fault of big business seeing another way to get over on the workers.
hmmm.. two income families... two people working... we'll just split the pay in half and there you go.
even if women didnt enter the workforce, they would have thought of something.
like a lot of 6 figure folks got severance packages at my company so they could promote other people and pay them a third yo a half of what the original people got paid.
say 120,000 down to 40-60 grand with more responsibilities
Zero Tolerance
Registered User
Isn't that what ALL television shows are about these days? That and how all men are stupid with very intelligent wives.
Zero Tolerance
Registered User
LegalGear. I almost gave up on this thread because you couldn't simply use the ignore feature. What a bunch of wasted reading. If you need help with the ignore feature, send me a PM and I'll help you out.
In any event, my wife retired two weeks after we got married. I noticed she wasn't going to work anymore - and I asked her about it. That was it. She says she's crazy. She can't work. Blah, blah, blah. Whatever. I can afford to support the both of us. And I can't physically force her to work. Can I?
Basically she spends everything I make. She can't save money. I have everything I need, so I deal with it. And we have a good relationship otherwise. But I'm sure if I took away her ability to spend my money, I'd be divorced. Being that I own several businesses, I'd surely be basically out of all of them by the end of divorce court.
ANYWAY. I thought it would be cool to marry a younger woman. She's about 8 years younger I am. Now she's thinking about having kids. So, I'll be financially responsible for these kids until the day I retire or longer. Wonderful.
I've been working my ass off to retire early for a long time now. I could have retired in my early 30s - but I got married instead. Now I'm going to have to be a big earner until the day I die... And if I don't follow the procedure, I'll lose everything.
It's fun to be a man.
Oh and that male feminist that you should be ignoring is probably just off a heavy cycle and without ANY testosterone flowing through his veins. Ask him anything about Sex And The City - he knows it all.
In any event, my wife retired two weeks after we got married. I noticed she wasn't going to work anymore - and I asked her about it. That was it. She says she's crazy. She can't work. Blah, blah, blah. Whatever. I can afford to support the both of us. And I can't physically force her to work. Can I?
Basically she spends everything I make. She can't save money. I have everything I need, so I deal with it. And we have a good relationship otherwise. But I'm sure if I took away her ability to spend my money, I'd be divorced. Being that I own several businesses, I'd surely be basically out of all of them by the end of divorce court.
ANYWAY. I thought it would be cool to marry a younger woman. She's about 8 years younger I am. Now she's thinking about having kids. So, I'll be financially responsible for these kids until the day I retire or longer. Wonderful.
I've been working my ass off to retire early for a long time now. I could have retired in my early 30s - but I got married instead. Now I'm going to have to be a big earner until the day I die... And if I don't follow the procedure, I'll lose everything.
It's fun to be a man.
Oh and that male feminist that you should be ignoring is probably just off a heavy cycle and without ANY testosterone flowing through his veins. Ask him anything about Sex And The City - he knows it all.
GuyverX
Well-known member
Zero, thats too tough for words.
And people wonder why i am avoiding marriage like the plague.
Not prejudging all women, but if I do become financially successful instead of just financially stable, I might get taken for all i am worth.
Might sound chauvanist but the only adult woman I am supporting is going to be my mom in her old age.
-----
p.s. Zero you might want to take a trip to get yourself snipped. that is if you dont want kids.
or make sure you keep your condoms in a safe place.
And people wonder why i am avoiding marriage like the plague.
Not prejudging all women, but if I do become financially successful instead of just financially stable, I might get taken for all i am worth.
Might sound chauvanist but the only adult woman I am supporting is going to be my mom in her old age.
-----
p.s. Zero you might want to take a trip to get yourself snipped. that is if you dont want kids.
or make sure you keep your condoms in a safe place.
GuyverX
Well-known member
wasnt old enough to register during the first gulf war.
but I seriously thought and still think they are going to reopen the draft.
dont mind serving my country... but I have friends who lived through iraq and told me about it.
I am not a coward but walking into a death trap... no way.
Triple Cs
Member
I, if you read the thread on marriage, am stridently against it. There is no benefit in getting married vs. having a girlfriend, only a huge financial risk. The legal contract gave her the go ahead to not work. As far as marriage goes, Judeo-Christian theology requires that in order for a marriage to be valid the couple must have an "openness toward children".
Still, guys need to take responsibility. What about asking for a pre-nup (no community property, no alimony)? She always intended to quit work, you ask for a pre-nup and you at least have some protection and it gives a window to her motivations (Is she getting married for love or are there parts of the legal contract that she really wants). If she doesn't work now, do you think she's going to put in the extra work that having kids will take (even as a stay-at-home mom)?
As far as the guy being turned down for a vasectomy, he should have gone to another doctor. Planned Parenthood could refer you to a doctor that believes in the "my body, my choice" philosophy. However, most guys don't realize that the majority of women want babies as badly as we want sex. More women than you would think would be willing to go outside their marriage to get pregnant. Invalid Link Removed Even getting a vasectomy isn't enough protection if you are married, the law doesn't consider paternity fraud because it is still stuck in the age where an adulterous wife would receive brutal punishment. Besides, a vasectomy (if you haven't had a child already), violates the marriage requirement of "openness toward children"
I think guys know what the risks are, they just subscribe to the "it won't happen to me" line of thinking. I have heard of the term marriage strike, maybe there needs to be a baby strike until the law changes.
Still, guys need to take responsibility. What about asking for a pre-nup (no community property, no alimony)? She always intended to quit work, you ask for a pre-nup and you at least have some protection and it gives a window to her motivations (Is she getting married for love or are there parts of the legal contract that she really wants). If she doesn't work now, do you think she's going to put in the extra work that having kids will take (even as a stay-at-home mom)?
As far as the guy being turned down for a vasectomy, he should have gone to another doctor. Planned Parenthood could refer you to a doctor that believes in the "my body, my choice" philosophy. However, most guys don't realize that the majority of women want babies as badly as we want sex. More women than you would think would be willing to go outside their marriage to get pregnant. Invalid Link Removed Even getting a vasectomy isn't enough protection if you are married, the law doesn't consider paternity fraud because it is still stuck in the age where an adulterous wife would receive brutal punishment. Besides, a vasectomy (if you haven't had a child already), violates the marriage requirement of "openness toward children"
I think guys know what the risks are, they just subscribe to the "it won't happen to me" line of thinking. I have heard of the term marriage strike, maybe there needs to be a baby strike until the law changes.
Triple Cs
Member
If I wanted a child (which I don't), I would find an egg donor of the same race as myself and then hire a surrogate mother (either in America or a developing country like India). No custody battles, no confusion. This is the equivalent to all the single women that use sperm donors. Honestly, with the out of wedlock birthrate skyrocketing, why don't women just go to the sperm bank more often? The woman would spend less time trying to conceive and would have no need to lie about birth control or convince the guy to not use protection. The downside is the relinquishment of child support.
Mulletsoldier
Binging on Pure ****ing Rage
You're right: being able to properly interpret data and events, and trying to form fair and balanced gender opinions must mean I'm a feminist.
Simply because I'm not following the crowd and jumping in on the, "women suck!" sentiment, does not mean I'm ignoring the very real issues LG brought up; merely trying to interject some balance into the discussion.
And because you made a horrible decision in whom you'd mate with, and are consequently butthurt about it, does not mean 'the woman' is keeping you down. Do men get unfairly and unrequitedly screwed in family (divorce) court, and paternity related manners? Yes, they sure do; I recognized that a few times. As I said though Zero, you have to; a) separate the ability to insist on decisions in certain legal situations from culture wide power; and b) stop looking at gender issues so ethnocentrically - because women's lot in life has improved very significantly in the West, does not mean we are that far from the mid 1800's in other parts of the world.
Zero Tolerance
Registered User
I'm okay because I secretly save money on my own. So I have plenty in the event I need it for anything. It just sucks having to keep secrets in a marriage. For years I asked her to save just a thousand dollars - and she could not. She's a hot little Puerto Rican woman that has some issues - but I love her and I love taking care of her - so I'll take the **** I get...
Do not get married. Not until you're old. Even pre-nups are a waste of time. Just enjoy life until you can no longer do that by yourself. Or, if you find your dreamgirl - and nothing else matters - than go for it.
If my wife wants a kid or two, I'll give them to her. I feel that even though I don't want them, it's not fair to take that opportunity away from her. If she wants to be a mother, I can't take that away from her. I just hope SHE WANTS a kid and it's not her whole stupid family bothering her with "so when are you going to have a child? You can't wait forever, you know"!
Do not get married. Not until you're old. Even pre-nups are a waste of time. Just enjoy life until you can no longer do that by yourself. Or, if you find your dreamgirl - and nothing else matters - than go for it.
If my wife wants a kid or two, I'll give them to her. I feel that even though I don't want them, it's not fair to take that opportunity away from her. If she wants to be a mother, I can't take that away from her. I just hope SHE WANTS a kid and it's not her whole stupid family bothering her with "so when are you going to have a child? You can't wait forever, you know"!
Zero Tolerance
Registered User
My wife and I got married about the same time I started my business.. Before the actual business, I did the same type of work for myself. We both worked. At that point in time, everything seemed normal. In fact, she made a little more than me being I had left my job and started on my own.
My decision on who to mate with wasn't horrible at all. I'm happy other than the fact that she can't save a dime. I can live with that. However, if things ever turn sour and we go our separate ways, she takes at least 50% of me with her. So now she's got her 100% - AND my 50%. Boy is it going to be easy for her to find a new man being 150% (at least) of a person! I'll have to hope I keep my youthful looks because at HALF a man, I'm not going to be very marketable...
My decision on who to mate with wasn't horrible at all. I'm happy other than the fact that she can't save a dime. I can live with that. However, if things ever turn sour and we go our separate ways, she takes at least 50% of me with her. So now she's got her 100% - AND my 50%. Boy is it going to be easy for her to find a new man being 150% (at least) of a person! I'll have to hope I keep my youthful looks because at HALF a man, I'm not going to be very marketable...
You're right: being able to properly interpret data and events, and trying to form fair and balanced gender opinions must mean I'm a feminist.
Simply because I'm not following the crowd and jumping in on the, "women suck!" sentiment, does not mean I'm ignoring the very real issues LG brought up; merely trying to interject some balance into the discussion.
And because you made a horrible decision in whom you'd mate with, and are consequently butthurt about it, does not mean 'the woman' is keeping you down. Do men get unfairly and unrequitedly screwed in family (divorce) court, and paternity related manners? Yes, they sure do; I recognized that a few times. As I said though Zero, you have to; a) separate the ability to insist on decisions in certain legal situations from culture wide power; and b) stop looking at gender issues so ethnocentrically - because women's lot in life has improved very significantly in the West, does not mean we are that far from the mid 1800's in other parts of the world.
Mulletsoldier
Binging on Pure ****ing Rage
If you knew you were going to marry this woman, why would you not have discussed the financial details of your union? Both in terms of within the union, and the unfortunate circumstance it would end? Despite bleeding heart-liberal bureaucrats using a band-aid solution to a dam-sized problem (gender inequity, that is), and creating unfair divorce/paternity laws, they do not force you to get married; the government does not force you to engage in casual encounters; the government does not force you to not wear a condom; and the government most definitely does not force you or anybody else to wed.
While some of these stories are unfortunate, I have not seen a single person offer what could even be slightly construed as responsibility for the actions which have transpired in their life. On the converse, the sentiment about women making .75 to every 1.00 in comparable situations is, "they haven't earned it". Well I see, in that particular context, individual responsibility is at heart, but in these mating choices, it's solely and deliberately the government, and women in general's fault.
Before anybody in this thread begins convincing themselves that their lot in life as a male is universally and deliberately disadvantaged, take a few days and travel to East Hastings (you can stay on West Hastings, it is fine there). Talk to some of the immigrant prostitutes brought in by either the Asian or Biker gangs from South America/Southeast Asia, for the drug trafficking/prostitution trade alive and vibrant on the coast. Ask them how it feels to be given the option of performing sexual favors, or facing brutal beatings or death. Ask them if they agree with you that objectification does not exist - that women choose that way. Better yet, tell them that you willingly chose a partner, without necessarily knowing your rights, and the situation turned out unfavorably for you. I'm sure they'll agree that the white male is the most disadvantaged population sub-group on the planet.
While some of these stories are unfortunate, I have not seen a single person offer what could even be slightly construed as responsibility for the actions which have transpired in their life. On the converse, the sentiment about women making .75 to every 1.00 in comparable situations is, "they haven't earned it". Well I see, in that particular context, individual responsibility is at heart, but in these mating choices, it's solely and deliberately the government, and women in general's fault.
Before anybody in this thread begins convincing themselves that their lot in life as a male is universally and deliberately disadvantaged, take a few days and travel to East Hastings (you can stay on West Hastings, it is fine there). Talk to some of the immigrant prostitutes brought in by either the Asian or Biker gangs from South America/Southeast Asia, for the drug trafficking/prostitution trade alive and vibrant on the coast. Ask them how it feels to be given the option of performing sexual favors, or facing brutal beatings or death. Ask them if they agree with you that objectification does not exist - that women choose that way. Better yet, tell them that you willingly chose a partner, without necessarily knowing your rights, and the situation turned out unfavorably for you. I'm sure they'll agree that the white male is the most disadvantaged population sub-group on the planet.
GuyverX
Well-known member
my cousin went to several doctors.
they all gave him the 'too young' line and refused.
one guy agreed off the record off insurance but he couldnt afford the price at the time.
my company pays for it so I got mine ASAP.
GuyverX
Well-known member
from what i have seen and heard, marriage is definitely not for me. ever.
too much risk without reward for me. love and companionship paling in comparison to freedom and my money being spent on what and whom I choose when I choose.
Mulletsoldier
Binging on Pure ****ing Rage
It was an analogy to point out that some of the complaints in this thread are being magnified to ridiculous degrees. Some (you included) have focused on the disadvantages of males in specific legal situations; many are complaining that women are universally advantaged - that's ridiculous.
The point was this: plain and simple, as a male in western society (particularly a white male) you are afforded advantages in everyday situations over other sub-groups. Google, "White Privilege" for some interesting reading. In reality, males are not disadvantaged in a general sense, nor necessarily more disadvantaged than females. Do you face those same circumstances? Anybody you know? Didn't think so. In reality, your stock in life is not that bad.
As well, the point was to showcase certain culture-wide attitudes which are differentiated from power in specific legal situations; somebody in this thread claimed female objectification doesn't exist. That process is defined as, "to treat as a mere object and deny the dignity of". Not positive, but I believe that fits the bill. You may not engage in any acts of soliciting prostitution yourself, but I guarantee you know somebody that has - even if at a strip club or otherwise. I'm also quite sure, that while you have thought it was disgusting, you didn't condemn it, nor consider the implications of such acts on culture-wide sexual attitudes surrounding women. "To make an object", as I said, I believe viewing a stripper as a hole constitutes that definition. While male strip clubs exist - and I'm sure the same lewd acts occur - the frequencies are incomparable.
Mulletsoldier
Binging on Pure ****ing Rage
Anyway, I see no need to reinvolve myself in this thread. I made my points clear earlier, and there is no need to rehash them.
At any rate, that debate is not the point of the thread anyway; I believe LG was merely attempting to point out some specific legal disadvantages (hopefully) and I initially misconstrued his purpose. Altering such ridiculously unfair laws for the better is a fine purpose, IMO, and not something I wish to perturb any further. I just saw it completely unnecessary for Zero Tolerance to involve me again with his comments.
At any rate, that debate is not the point of the thread anyway; I believe LG was merely attempting to point out some specific legal disadvantages (hopefully) and I initially misconstrued his purpose. Altering such ridiculously unfair laws for the better is a fine purpose, IMO, and not something I wish to perturb any further. I just saw it completely unnecessary for Zero Tolerance to involve me again with his comments.
thebigt
Legend
sorry you are withdrawing from this thread. i have issues with your comments about being advantaged by being a white male. given the title caucasion male means i stand on my own. i have no civil rights group representing me when i am singled out for merely being who i am. to me the only color with any advantage is green.
Triple Cs
Member
Be careful, those lawyers and forensic accountants get all over everything. I agree somewhat with your thoughts on a pre-nup. The cost money to draft and to defend, but I view the pre-nup as a character test. If she wants you to sign the marriage contract, than there is no excuse for her to sign a pre-nup contract.
Marrying much younger is always a wise choice, time is gentle on a man's physical appeal. People of previous generations had that right on point.
I totally disagree about having a child. You aren't taking away anything. You're not giving her a person which you will also be responsible for. She will do all the work of raising them. In addition to financial support, she will expect you to do a lot of extra work around the house pertaining to taking care of the kids. Not to mention she could change. It seems like she relaxes her efforts with you when she gets what she wants. Her effort in the marriage could be severly reduced. I feel that too many guys just are indifferent to children, and then realize how much unwanted work & sacrifice comes from something they didn't want in the first place.
thebigt
Legend
you are wrong on so many counts i don't know where to start. the dads i know are very dedicated to their kids. and single mom's can't wait to rush kids off to day care-even on days off and vacation. i have seen many guys who didn't really want kids do a 180 when they hold that kid in their arms.
Triple Cs
Member
Mulletsoldier is right, people do this and I don't see why. The thing is, marriage gives the woman a huge incentive to change. Why should she keep herself in top condition and put the effort into the relationship once the relationship is a contractual obligation.
Most women know the conditions and realities that favor them, and still many of them are unhappy. When you neglect the relationship, that will not make you happy. You will be the prison guard, always with an unhappy prisoner that only stays out of obligation and the financial consequences of leaving. Women will never abandon marriage like the 70s feminists wanted. Even without the monetary part, most never let go of the "princess day" fantasy. Even though weddings are held at locations where other "princesses" get married all the time.
I think men want to marry to "lock-in" the best girl the have ever known, or at least dated. The truth is, you can't "lock-in". She has an incentive to change for the worse in marriage.
One study compared the endorphins released in the first stages of love to the reaction that cocaine causes. I haven't done the drug, so I can't compare, but a lot of men drink the kool-aid an d propose. The others have "reached a certain age", want to have a traditional family or will do anything to keep their girlfriend.
The older generation didn't really realize the power dynamics had changed due to the legal system, until it was too late. Young guys have plenty of examples and should know better
Triple Cs
Member
I didn't say the dads aren't dedicated and I'm sure some do change their minds because the child is their blood. You can be happy with the results. How many of those guys who are getting stretched thin with children want to have more? They would probably be happy with those kids and love them also, but it doesn't mean that they should want to have them.
You want to be sure that you will be with the mother for life. You want to be sure that the mother will do a good job. You can love the kid and hate the circumstances. Also, by using a surrogate as I posted above, the child can never be taken away from the man.
Beau
Well-known member
GuyverX
Well-known member
excellent points.
I do find it rather amusing that women seem to think the 'right woman' can change a man's mind about marriage.
I always saw that as a codependency issue.
Where one's life choices mainly are reactionary.
Mine usually fall on the side of whats practical and will give me a good escape route, should the need arise.
GuyverX
Well-known member