Some people just are not cut out to run cycles. And I don't mean that as an insult. I shouldn't run cycles because I'm a normal looking slim guy who in clothing you couldn't even tell I lift. I certainly have not reached my natural potential and I'm lucky if I can bench 100kg. I just enjoy seeing the effects they can have on me. They certainly help me get into shape quicker than without. I have little mini projects, one time was to see my six pack when I was in my early forties. Another was to get to 220lbs and keep a relatively slim waist. Weird stuff. Then I stop for months at a time and return to "normal". I like learning how they work and giving others advise.
I remember a guy on here once who started a private chat with me because he had got hold of some epistane and I had used the same brand and mentally he just wasn't cut out (or ready) for it. Within a day he was like "I think I can feel it working", day two he was like "I look bigger already, this is amazing", day three "I haven't got any bigger, I felt a bit tired today, not sure it's working". I'm like "patience is key man, it will take a couple of weeks to kick in. Patience is key". Day four "I think my epi is bunk, I've ordered superdrol because I hear that makes you huge." I'm like "stay with the epistane, give it a few weeks stay the course". Day 7 "superdrol turned up today, took some already, bring on the gains!!" Day 10, "I've been feeling tired today and my pee was a bit dark, I think my kidneys are failing so I've stopped my cycle and started PCT"...
Don't really know where I'm going with this, just filling your thread with my waffling, but if your not mentally prepared as well as physically prepared with proper diet etc. I would save it until you are.
I'm the opposite of you in that if I start feeling lethargic, balls shrink or start getting back pumps I'm like "Yaas, my stuff's legit!!" Lol.