Update:
Today is day 8 and I’m pretty much through the physical withdrawals. Any physical withdrawals I feel at this point are the result of heightened anxiety (sweaty palms, racing heart, etc.). The last two night I’ve slept very well, even deeper than usual. I attribute that to my body needing extra sleep because it’s recovering from the lack of sleep and overall abuse it was exposed to on those first 5 days of withdrawal. I exercised every other day for the first week and actually went pretty hard but that was literally the only physical exertion I had during those days. The rest of the day I would rest.
So what am I feeling at this point? The battle is definitely not over. It’s a mental game now. I’m dealing with anxiety, boredom, a sense of dread, agitation, anger, mixed with nostalgia and sentimental thoughts. To put it simply, I’m emotionally raw. The good news is that I have absolutely zero cravings to use any opiate at all. My outlook on the future is bright, I just have to get through this next stretch of detox.
Also, I’d like to mention that this withdrawal may not simply be from kratom alone. I used pain pills and kratom (switching it up day by day and mixing them together other days) for three months and then switched to just using kratom for the past two months. So I was using opiates for five months total (let’s please not argue about whether kratom is an opiate because it certainly functions as one for me). So maybe the damage I’ve done to my neurochemistry is cumalutve and I’m currently experiencing a withdrawal that is largely the result of kratom, but still partially the result of the pain pills I took previously. In addition to this, I’ve been addicted to opiates a couple times over the last seven years, including heroin (haven’t touched that for 3+ years), so my body is prone to getting addicted to them again very fast.
Last thing I’d like to mention is that I’ve withdrawaled cold turkey about four or five times over this five month period. Every time I would make it about seven to ten days and then relapse. So my body is beaten down from this shyt and I’m so sick of the sleepless nights, cold sweats, restlessness, mental anguish, and the other thousand withdrawal symptoms, even the minor ones like runny nose, goosebumps, and yawning. I’ve finally gotten over that hump and now have absolutely known desire to touch any of that stuff again. I can’t handle another withdrawal in my life.