Is there a pheramone that will make wives have sex

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  1. lol- so you can take it back to the store and exchange it for something else .. :P

    I'll make sure to get one of those when I do decide to step in line to loose half my sh!t :P - j/k


  2. FYI, at least in the great state of texas, just make sure you pay for your house out of your bank account, never join that specific one, and just keep your loan current. Then it doesn't matter WHAT she does, because if it was a prior asset to the marriage (aka anti-sex relationship), you can always trade in on a newer, younger, more sex crazed model, and the old defunkt unit can't take anything expensive cept maybe your latest flat screen. Of course that works until the marriage juice sucks it all out of the new spousal unit! Then it's back to square one...



    (p.s. there's some satire/humor in there, so don't take it all literally)
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  3. b5150 greatest post ever

    but for 3 yrs ive been doing that lol

    minus the espn and ps2 part
    toes-on-the-nose.blogspot.com Deployed blogging

  4. Quote Originally Posted by 1meand View Post
    We have both read the book and been to one of his conferences. Trust me I have been trying everything, but I don't think she even wants to be receptive to me. We have two kids that she mainly focuses on and I'll just have to shut the sexual desire part of me off until the kids are out of the house(in 15 years). I've always heard and read that sex was God's gift to us, but if it's going to be like this, then I wish I had a gift receipt.
    I think she's telling you something very very clearly!

    Does she love you? Doesn't sound like it to me. If she loved you she wouldn't she want to fix it as much as you do? If you want to get all biblical on it, she has duties and this is one of them.

    Several things ( possibilities )

    1. Both get full blood / thyroid / hormone tests

    2. See a marriage / sex counsellor

    3. See a Dr. for her lack of libido

    4. Hire a baby sitter

    5. Do what you did when she "fell in love with you"

    6. Man it up baby ( i.e. be that young stud again, show her women want you )

    7. There are so many fcked up reasons a woman can lose interest it's not funny. They are fckin all round complicated. Here's a link to read some stuff:

    http://health.ivillage.com/sexualhealth/sxarousal/0,,9bp87snw,00.html?ice=iv|wb| sexhealing

    8. She's probably fckin hanging on mentally emotionally of how you "never took out the garbage" back when you were both first married, yes that's how fcked up it can be.

    9. She resents you for making her pregnant and taking away her youth / beauty etc

    10. She's fckin the office hottie at lunch time cause she's just tired when she gets home / you get home.

    Don't wanna rain on your parade but man it up baby and fix that ****, I dunno sorry but it just doesn't sound very positive to me, doesn't mean you can't fix it but SHE has to want to as well.

    Just my 40 cents.
  5. Never enough
    EasyEJL's Avatar

    Quote Originally Posted by 1meand View Post
    We have both read the book and been to one of his conferences. Trust me I have been trying everything, but I don't think she even wants to be receptive to me. We have two kids that she mainly focuses on and I'll just have to shut the sexual desire part of me off until the kids are out of the house(in 15 years). I've always heard and read that sex was God's gift to us, but if it's going to be like this, then I wish I had a gift receipt.
    I tried over and over today to post something, but I was having a hard time coming up with something that sounded nice. Luckily neoborn broke the ice for me so I feel a little less constrained. I bolded the one piece above, because that is the only piece of what you've said that matters. If she's not even lightly receptive, theres more wrong than having other things that fill her time. Its not like you are asking her to help build a model airplane or refinish your floors, sex is a matter of a few minutes (or a few seconds in neoborns case). If she can't and is unwilling to give you that 5 or 10 or even 30 minutes once or twice a ____ (fill in the timespan yourself), theres WAY more than just her focusing on the kids. They have to sleep sometimes
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  6. Quote Originally Posted by EasyEJL View Post
    I tried over and over today to post something, but I was having a hard time coming up with something that sounded nice. Luckily neoborn broke the ice for me so I feel a little less constrained. I bolded the one piece above, because that is the only piece of what you've said that matters. If she's not even lightly receptive, theres more wrong than having other things that fill her time. Its not like you are asking her to help build a model airplane or refinish your floors, sex is a matter of a few minutes (or a few seconds in neoborns case). If she can't and is unwilling to give you that 5 or 10 or even 30 minutes once or twice a ____ (fill in the timespan yourself), theres WAY more than just her focusing on the kids. They have to sleep sometimes
    They are truly like a deep deep ocean when we just wanna surf the waves!

    And .....hey fcker! it's quality of time not quantity..pff so there

    P.s have some candy with love Neoborn
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  7. Quote Originally Posted by B5150 View Post
    You younger married guys need to learn a few things about what stimulates your wifes desire for you.

    Foreplay.

    Not the kind you are thinking about.

    Foreplay starts in the kitchen. Set the table, clean up, clean the dishes and or put them away.

    Foreplay starts in the laundry room. Wash both your clothes and put them away.

    Foreplay starts at the grocery store. Do the shopping. Or at least do it together.

    Foreplay starts at homework time. Help your kid do their homework.

    Foreplay starts at bath time. Give your kid a bath so your wife does not have to do it.

    Foreplay starts when ESPN, Comedy Central, PC's and PlayStation are turned off.

    Foreplay starts when I come home with her favorite candy and a blank card that says "everything that is good in my life is because of you".

    You guys get the picture. They operate on a completely different level. I used to get completely insane when my wife would not "just be horney" or find "my body irresistable".

    We bone because that's what we do. I used to think that I wanted a wife with a sexual desire that is compatable with mine. Geeze, I am sure glad she has some self respect in that area. God knows I am a lust machine that finds desire whenever the wind blows.

    Anyway...that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
    B5150,
    if you could find a brilliant chemist to take your idea and synthesize it into 6-9,cleanthedishesterone and
    1-3,dothelaundydiol buy a capsule maker, and put them in a real purty bottle, you would become a very wealthy man

  8. I have been married long enough (7 years) to know that B5 is right, do stuff around the house and make her life easier. After that, the rest works itself out. Also keep in mind that after kids things are more difficult

  9. Quote Originally Posted by B5150 View Post
    You younger married guys need to learn a few things about what stimulates your wifes desire for you.

    Foreplay.

    Not the kind you are thinking about.

    Foreplay starts in the kitchen. Set the table, clean up, clean the dishes and or put them away.

    Foreplay starts in the laundry room. Wash both your clothes and put them away.

    Foreplay starts at the grocery store. Do the shopping. Or at least do it together.

    Foreplay starts at homework time. Help your kid do their homework.

    Foreplay starts at bath time. Give your kid a bath so your wife does not have to do it.

    Foreplay starts when ESPN, Comedy Central, PC's and PlayStation are turned off.

    Foreplay starts when I come home with her favorite candy and a blank card that says "everything that is good in my life is because of you".

    You guys get the picture. They operate on a completely different level. I used to get completely insane when my wife would not "just be horney" or find "my body irresistable".

    We bone because that's what we do. I used to think that I wanted a wife with a sexual desire that is compatable with mine. Geeze, I am sure glad she has some self respect in that area. God knows I am a lust machine that finds desire whenever the wind blows.

    Anyway...that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
    This is RIGHT ON. Men and Women are completely different beasts. I've been married for 12 years and just this past year I started getting this right. It works every time!
  10. Never enough
    EasyEJL's Avatar

    Mixing her a couple of key lime martinis generally works really well for me
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  11. Quote Originally Posted by EasyEJL View Post
    Mixing her a couple of key lime martinis generally works really well for me
    I would ask my honey how my rohy...er method is working but she doesn't seem to remember....oh well

  12. Quote Originally Posted by neoborn View Post
    I would ask my honey how my rohy...er method is working but she doesn't seem to remember....oh well
    You lost me there bub. Care to elaborate?

  13. *Duplicate Post please delete*

  14. Quote Originally Posted by SatireWolf View Post
    You lost me there bub. Care to elaborate?
    Good thing I wasn't trying to get you to follow then eh. If you want to understand read the whole thread nublet
  15. Never enough
    EasyEJL's Avatar

    Quote Originally Posted by SatireWolf View Post
    You lost me there bub. Care to elaborate?
    It always looses the humor when you have to explain
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  16. Ohhh... R00f13s and w1ff13s, never would have put the 2 in the same context. ZOINK! WHO DA THUNK BRAIN! You can verbally abuse me now!

  17. Quote Originally Posted by sumguy View Post
    Okay, you guys sealed it, I'm never getting married. What's the point then?
    That is absolutely crazy. Not all marriages result in no sex. Sure if you don't get along and nobody tries in the relationship. Or one person dominates the other and turns it into a hate fest.

    But I'm married and we have sex everyday. And yeah he pisses me off alot but we still have that passion. We try new things to boost drive just for the fun in it.

    You get back what you put into a relationship.
  18. Never enough
    EasyEJL's Avatar

    Quote Originally Posted by crader View Post
    But I'm married and we have sex everyday. And yeah he pisses me off alot but we still have that passion.
    How long have you been married? Somehow I just recalled the marriage jar old wives tale. Thats if you take a jar the day you get married, and every time you have sex the first year of your marriage you put a bean into the jar, and every time after the first year you take a bean out, you never empty the jar

    I've been married 12 years, the jar would have been emptied before the end of year 2 in our case.
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  19. Quote Originally Posted by B5150 View Post
    You younger married guys need to learn a few things about what stimulates your wifes desire for you.

    Foreplay.

    Not the kind you are thinking about.

    Foreplay starts in the kitchen. Set the table, clean up, clean the dishes and or put them away.

    Foreplay starts in the laundry room. Wash both your clothes and put them away.

    Foreplay starts at the grocery store. Do the shopping. Or at least do it together.

    Foreplay starts at homework time. Help your kid do their homework.

    Foreplay starts at bath time. Give your kid a bath so your wife does not have to do it.

    Foreplay starts when ESPN, Comedy Central, PC's and PlayStation are turned off.

    Foreplay starts when I come home with her favorite candy and a blank card that says "everything that is good in my life is because of you".

    You guys get the picture. They operate on a completely different level. I used to get completely insane when my wife would not "just be horney" or find "my body irresistable".

    We bone because that's what we do. I used to think that I wanted a wife with a sexual desire that is compatable with mine. Geeze, I am sure glad she has some self respect in that area. God knows I am a lust machine that finds desire whenever the wind blows.

    Anyway...that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
    You know, i am not married and or considering it anytime soon but, i found this to be an INSANELY useful piece of mind. My girl and i have been together for a year and like 2 months now, the sex has slowed down GREATLY from when we first were together(i think thats the story of every single relationship to ever exist)...and it still drives me crazy that she won't just bang me all the time like we used to, as my mindset is thats basically what you are here for.

    Well thats obviously wrong and i think after reading this i will try some things differently and see where it gets me, even if the kids/laundry stuff does not apply, i still get the picture.....bravo sir.

  20. Quote Originally Posted by EasyEJL View Post
    How long have you been married? Somehow I just recalled the marriage jar old wives tale. Thats if you take a jar the day you get married, and every time you have sex the first year of your marriage you put a bean into the jar, and every time after the first year you take a bean out, you never empty the jar

    I've been married 12 years, the jar would have been emptied before the end of year 2 in our case.
    Well...we met at the Arnold and married the next month so...3 months. But even still we work on our relationship everyday.

  21. Quote Originally Posted by crader View Post
    Well...we met at the Arnold and married the next month so...3 months. But even still we work on our relationship everyday.
    Get back to us at year 7 ...k thx.. I wish you both love happiness, and much much much sex.
  22. Never enough
    EasyEJL's Avatar

    Quote Originally Posted by neoborn View Post
    Get back to us at year 7 ...
    Its kind of funny retrospectively, mine didn't slow down (even during the pregancies with our 2 kids) until maybe year 11, and that was the year she got pregnant and had a miscarriage, which just left us an emotional mess. I guess I just got lucky
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  23. Quote Originally Posted by EasyEJL View Post
    I tried over and over today to post something, but I was having a hard time coming up with something that sounded nice. Luckily neoborn broke the ice for me so I feel a little less constrained. I bolded the one piece above, because that is the only piece of what you've said that matters. If she's not even lightly receptive, theres more wrong than having other things that fill her time. Its not like you are asking her to help build a model airplane or refinish your floors, sex is a matter of a few minutes (or a few seconds in neoborns case). If she can't and is unwilling to give you that 5 or 10 or even 30 minutes once or twice a ____ (fill in the timespan yourself), theres WAY more than just her focusing on the kids. They have to sleep sometimes
    So true..
    Of course, it is apparent that you should have and make the time to change some things with yourself to make you more attractive... wether that be for your wife, or for potential other women, or for yourself...
    Never stop improving ... women can sense this drive alone and are attracted to it.

    I also don't think it can be ALL "bad" .... I'd really like a few more people to chime in and tell me that things are still great after so many years....
  24. Never enough
    EasyEJL's Avatar

    Quote Originally Posted by xtraflossy View Post
    I also don't think it can be ALL "bad" .... I'd really like a few more people to chime in and tell me that things are still great after so many years....
    at almost 13 years, I have sex with my wife as often as i want to. At one point a few years back there was a lull, and she wasn't quite so interested. I made it really clear "I go grocery shopping, i cook all our meals including parties for your friends, I play bartender at our parties, I drive to see your relatives, and do plenty of other things that you want to do. You can put up with 5 minutes (ok i'm lying, 15-20 seconds) worth of me grunting 4-5x a week whether you happen to want to do it or not, cause trust me, theres a lot of stuff i'd rather not do that takes up way more of my time than that". We've never had a problem after that

    Actually she "starts the process" plenty of the time nowadays, that down period was just during a bunch of particularly hard financial stuff right after moving into our first house around 7 years ago. Thats generally what hits you in the crotch first, having a hit in the wallet.
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  25. This is why I think you should date someone for a lengthy period of time, to get to know them and find out if you 2 are sexually compatable.

  26. Quote Originally Posted by texxlnghorn View Post
    This is why I think you should date someone for a lengthy period of time, to get to know them and find out if you 2 are sexually compatable.
    That can sometimes be the problem, they give you everything you want until the ring goes on or the kids get born. Then things change.
  27. It's Not All Bad...Check It Out!


    I'm sure this post (though interesting, funny, etc) is scaring the heck most unmarried guys.

    I'm married over 12 years, we have 4 boys (10 and under) and we are loving life together. We are both take care of ourselves because we want to look good and feel good in the arms of each other.

    Put your girl first in all you do and she will be swept away and dedicated to you.

    No joke... we have sex every day to EOD. In fact I just finished our Lover Lounge. We have a covered porch and she begged me to tile the floor, screen it in, install hot tub, wicker furniture, etc. 1st night the hot tub went live...bamb! hot sex in the backyard!!! Women love a man that provides physically and emotionally.

    Marry the right one and you'll only marry once!

  28. I would love to hear more from 1Meand

  29. What do you want to hear? I could go on for hours.
  30. Never enough
    EasyEJL's Avatar

    Quote Originally Posted by 1meand View Post
    What do you want to hear? I could go on for hours.
    i'd like to hear what you plan to do next. Waiting 18 years till your kids move out before you have sex again doesn't sound like a viable plan. Do you or your wife have parents nearby enough that you could maybe do a 3 day weekend to vegas or a cruise and leave the kids with grandma/grandpa?
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