unmotivated fat loser

kw1k

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sums up my brother in a nutshell.

This kid is 17 years old, smokes cigarettes, smokes pot, doesn't exercise for ****, and was diagnosed with diabetes when he was 13 years old.

If he continues this **** he's not going to live past 40 years old. How the **** can i motivate this guy? How can i get him to start taking care of his health. I've talked to him about it and his responses is "i don't care". Well ***** you better starting caring unless you want to have heart problems in the future

He has a bad back due to poor posture, and doing dead lifts incorrectly for about 4 months than he stopped his whole "gym" phase.
 

kw1k

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Thats my problem man, and i cant get over it. I always judge him and i can tell it annoys him but I get so frustrated when i see him this way. In the past 2 months he has gained about 10 lbs.
 
methodice

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Try and relax about it all. Be a good role model and let him notice in his own good time.
 
methodice

methodice

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oh and don't refer to him as an unmotivated fat loser :)
 
SilentBob187

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Tell him that chicks dig three things, abs (shenanigans), biceps (shenanigans), and mullets (hell yeah!).

In all seriousness though, the only person that can motivate him to get in to the gym is going to be himself.

If you wanna be really mean, turn him in for posession. He's still considered a juvenile so he wouldn't be in for long, it could possibly put his life in perspective. Of course he wouldn't want to speak to you after this.

Or you could go Clockwork Orange on him and tape his eyelids open and make him watch Pumping Iron on loop.

It's early and I'm full of ideas.
 
Palo Alto Labs

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Get him interested in girls.
best motivator in the world



unfortunately there is little that you can do or say to get his head in the game.. ... some people just really dont care.. it sounds like he could be depressed or have a negative attitute towards life (some people who are diagnosed with diseases at a young age have this because they feel that life is entirely negative)
 
neoborn

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Sadly there is nothing you can do to 'make' him do anything. You can however express your concerns in a loving way and explain that you truly believe that you have a way to fix some of these problems over the course of time. Find something he would really like to fix and work on that with him.....baby steps!
 
KSMA

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I used to be 300+lbs when I was 19 and I am 6'3". For me it took a friend I had not seen in a while telling me bluntly that "I got fat" and "I looked terrible" to change. 100 pounds later i am a much healthier person thanks to him.

As for your brother, be honest with him, make sure he fully understands what is happening to his body and the danger involved. Express your concern as his older brother for his health and well being. You and your parents can help change his lifestyle by changing what foods are kept around the house, and attempting to limit the amount of junk he can eat.

Sometimes all it takes is seeing a positive result to desire further results. Offer help and support and hope he takes it. It wont happen overnight, you will have to struggle with him over this, bad habits are hard to break.

Also, I do agree, girls are great motivation.
 
wastedwhiteboy2

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at age 17 its too late to change a person. You could always kick his azz.:twisted:
 

teribleturtle

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at age 17 its too late to change a person. You could always kick his azz.:twisted:
Disagree, at 17 I was what can be considered a loser ( gangs, drugs, doing dirt) went to Jr. College got my act together, went to university and now its deciding between; Berkeley, U of Maryland, NYU, and M.I.T. for my Masters in Urban Planning. All I saying is that all hope is not lost at 17, I am with the previous person suggesting "Girls" they sure are an EXCELLENT MOTIVATOR!!
 
datBtrue

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Disagree, at 17 I was what can be considered a loser ( gangs, drugs, doing dirt) went to Jr. College got my act together, went to university and now its deciding between; Berkeley, U of Maryland, NYU, and M.I.T. for my Masters in Urban Planning. All I saying is that all hope is not lost at 17, I am with the previous person suggesting "Girls" they sure are an EXCELLENT MOTIVATOR!!
Awesome bro! I don't even know you but I'm proud of you.

I see you are a Terrapin...fingers crossed they make it to the dance on Sunday.
 
ValorOfOne

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One word....

Military. Get his ass to sign up, even if he can't make it through Bootcamp, his ass will have a new found perspective on life.

If he is far to obese for that road.. I suggest taking his laptop,weed,books,tv,xbox360 and throw them in the trash, then set the trash can on fire.

What will that accomplish? He will have nothing to do, and will be forced to look for other options. Or, you could just lock the fridge.
 

Highlanda01602

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One word....

Military. Get his ass to sign up, even if he can't make it through Bootcamp, his ass will have a new found perspective on life.

If he is far to obese for that road.. I suggest taking his laptop,weed,books,tv,xbox360 and throw them in the trash, then set the trash can on fire.

What will that accomplish? He will have nothing to do, and will be forced to look for other options. Or, you could just lock the fridge.
I speak very highly of our military, but that may be too much of a jump...
Try to spark his interest in sports. Monotonous cardio or the beginner weight lifting routines aren't the most alluring ideas to many. But if there is a goal in mind, say to become faster/stronger/BETTER, a new mindset forms. In either case however, you have to accept an individual for who they are.
 
MashedPotato

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Actually wont the military turn him away and tell in no uncertain manner to "come back when you've lost 100lbs".

In all reality though, i think the girl thing really is a good idea. Just the idea of having more "ladies" checking me out, helps me go that extra mile in the gym.

...now if only i could use the ladies motivator to get my coursework done....

(im stuck in DC trying to get my coursework done, whilst watching american gangsta....ha)
 
RenegadeRows

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Just be a good role model, encourage him to become more active occasionally, but accept him for who he is. Above all be a friend.

If you push someone to change they will do the opposite out of spite.

Easier said then done.
 
ecu19

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at age 17 its too late to change a person. You could always kick his azz.:twisted:
I disagree with this also, I was a little sh1thead in high school, and boy was I fat. I don't know what it was, but got my ass in gear on the physical side (I always had the smarts, just never really applied myself), and was on the chancellors list last sem. (4.0) and graduating soon. 3.55 is my gpa currently and i'm breezing by in classes, with little effort now. Enough about tooting my own horn, just wanted to let you know that 17 is not too late.

It really isn't up to anyone to make you change, (your brother) has to want to change himself. Nagging from my parents made me spite them more when I was in high school. Now they love what i've done with myself, and my life.
 
Force of Green

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Slip some clenbuterol and deprenyl in a glass of juice and... nahhh that's awful.
 
Force of Green

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Haha, I'm kidding. You can't really change people. People need to want to change themselves. You can only show people the reasons to want to change for the better.
 
MashedPotato

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Haha, I'm kidding. You can't really change people. People need to want to change themselves. You can only show people the reasons to want to change for the better.
Thats absolutely true. Showing your friend the error and the consiquence of his ways will hopefully change his actions and attitude.

Takes a lot of patience.
 
VolcomX311

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Every single year my best friend says, "this year I'm going to get a gym pass. I need to get in shape." And in the beginning I used to get all psyched and tell him all the ways I'd help, how to eat, the results to expect, getting all excited thinking he was serious. Now I just say, "right, uh-huh, gym pass..."

People truly have to want it themselves, you can only "temporarily" psych someone up, but if the motivation is solely placed on an external source, that motivation will last about as far as lunch time.

But I did sort of drug him once, just with Niacin, I thought watching him get paraesthesia would be funny
 

skunkman

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I would have to agree that the idea of more women being attracted to you is great motivation.

I had a similar situation with my bro and was always getting on his case about his life style (weed, cigs, pills, etc). This really only strained our relationship. After moving out I decided that the best way to get him motivated was to look past that stuff and treat him like I would as if he was doing the right things. Basically excepting his decisions. After I started approaching him with a neutral attitude we developed a very healthy relationship. He eventually felt comfortable enough to come to me about his drug and money issues. Once it reached that point it became easy to give advice on ways to eliminate those things in his life. He still smokes cigs but he's been going to the gym for the last year and a half. He's lost weight and looks way healthier.

Just try to except him for who he is and develop a relationship regardless of his current habits. Easier said than done. haha It took about a year of this for him to finally break down and decide he wants a happier life.

Good luck man.
 
bolt10

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But I did sort of drug him once, just with Niacin, I thought watching him get paraesthesia would be funny
LOL i have contemplated doing this to some friends before...i bet it was pretty funny
 
Force of Green

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Maybe he has a lower dopamine receptor content than the normal range? Atypical symptoms such as low motivation, pis$ poor eating, cigarette enjoyment, etc are signs of low dopamine activity.
 

krazy

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Let him mess up, make mistakes, and generally waste his life. Hes only 17. Youve got to be young and stupid sometime, right?

Its good that you are there to support him. Be a good role model, by all means. He has to make the decisions though. He has to hit rock bottom and look in the mirror and feel disgust at what he sees before he will generate any internal motivation to change. You yappin at him aint gonna do ****... :)

Wish you all the best.
 

krazy

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Maybe he has a lower dopamine receptor content than the normal range? Atypical symptoms such as low motivation, pis$ poor eating, cigarette enjoyment, etc are signs of low dopamine activity.
Dont put the 'chemical imbalance' label on this. Hes generally just a lazy ass. No need to medicate...

(Sure he might benefit from dopamine stimulation but who doesnt. This type of thing only manifests positive benefits when the user is aware of what they are doing to themselves through supplementation and has a specific goal in mind. Popping Ritalin's just gonna make him feel weird)

By the way, low motivation, piss poor eating, cigarette enjoyment are the traits of a large subsection of American culture :)
 

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