Who here has in laws that are fat and out of shape?

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  1. Quote Originally Posted by CompeteNPC View Post
    I don't have any sympathy when a person destroys themselves and is content with it.

    He does nothing to improve his personal well being nor his health. He has two children on top of it and chooses to play video games and drink beer. Is he a good father? Good hearted yes, but setting a good example of what kind of man a person should be he is not. His kids will get a little older and I can't wait till they ask him why he is so fat. I will then explain to them cause he's a fat ****ing slob who has mental issues and can't lift worth ****. This makes me so ****ing mad, fawk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! FAWKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK KKKK! FAWKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK KKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Quote Originally Posted by CompeteNPC View Post
    lol Im ****ing around but hey it does piss me off a little bit. My post was not literally supposed to be taken seriously with the cussing.
    I don't have an issue with the swearing. I have a huge issue with you feeling the need to tell someone's kids that their parents are ".......a fat ****ing slob who has mental issues and can't lift worth ****." WTH gives you the right to do that???


  2. Quote Originally Posted by SFreed View Post
    I don't have an issue with the swearing. I have a huge issue with you feeling the need to tell someone's kids that their parents are ".......a fat ****ing slob who has mental issues and can't lift worth ****." WTH gives you the right to do that???

    100% agree....
    like whisky I'm a recovering alcoholic.

    for some people food is an addiction, I have empathy/sympathy for those struggling with addictions.....they just replace my vodka with a plate of food-but for the grace of GOD there go i.

    btw @Whiskey congrats on your 5 years!!!!
    GOD, FAMILY, COUNTRY!!!
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  3. Wow man.... do you have kids? If you had problems, not necessarily weight, would you like someone say that to your kids? I had drug problems in my past and I would be devastated if anyone had spoke about me like that. Why not try to talk to the guy rather than be a c unt... we should never avoid people, help who wants to be help but be nice who wants to deal with their own sh!t. You come across as a damaged person man, why do you bring your aggro to such a generally nice community? We’re here to help push people to better themselves, not shame them into a corner.

  4. Just let me know your location and I can find a great psychiatrist for you. You're mentally insane and nothing you say has any substance whatsoever. You spout ignorant bull**** and are terrified of and despise anything that doesn't fit your own personal agenda. In your mind if someone doesn't think, look, or act like you, they are a worse person than you. I hope you realize this makes you the worst person in ANY room that you ever step foot into, no matter who else is there.

  5. Jesus, why do feel the need to overly worry and judge others. If you are really like this, I feel sorry for you. You will live a very lonely life, not to mention, you attention goes to things that don't even concern you. This is going off an accumulation of your posts, not just this one.
    Performax Labs Product Specialist
    Follow My Journey: http://anabolicminds.com/forum/workout-logs/269588-antms-lean-bulk.html
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  6. Hmmm, interesting thread. I also come from addictive family. Everyone but me was alcoholic. Unfortunately my issue is I used food to cope with my upbringing. I still fight it daily.

    I've been on AM a long time. Started here fat with no muscle. Lost like 125 lbs. Took PHs and gained a lot of muscle. Got fat again, skinny again, fat again, see the trend? It's a struggle for some people, everyone's different. I work out with friends that are in way better shape than me, however my heart rate is better than theirs, they gas the F out.

    Anywho... I hate when people judge others without knowing the whole story. Not necessarily at OP since I don't follow all his post, just anyone really.
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  7. Quote Originally Posted by SFreed View Post
    I don't have an issue with the swearing. I have a huge issue with you feeling the need to tell someone's kids that their parents are ".......a fat ****ing slob who has mental issues and can't lift worth ****." WTH gives you the right to do that???
    Quite simply being their uncle and setting the right example because their father lives a lifestyle that is unhealthy!!!! If they follow in his foot steps they are facing a very tough and mean road ahead of them in life.

  8. Quote Originally Posted by CompeteNPC View Post
    Quite simply being their uncle and setting the right example because their father lives a lifestyle that is unhealthy!!!! If they follow in his foot steps they are facing a very tough and mean road ahead of them in life.
    And the example you are setting by being a judgemental, condescending, anger filled, self righteous prick is better how exactly?

  9. Quote Originally Posted by Whisky View Post
    And the example you are setting by being a judgemental, condescending, anger filled, self righteous prick is better how exactly?
    It will save their lives for the better. Tough love goes a long way. I could be a real prick and take their fathers photo, print out a thousand copies and post them as flyers all over the neighborhood asking if anyone has seen the fat abominable snowman ⛄️ That will get their attention!

  10. Quote Originally Posted by CompeteNPC View Post
    Quite simply being their uncle and setting the right example because their father lives a lifestyle that is unhealthy!!!! If they follow in his foot steps they are facing a very tough and mean road ahead of them in life.
    If you want to set the right example, then help their Dad change his lifestyle. It will be the hardest thing you've ever done in your life, but it will be the right example to set.
    Twenty-Two Until None
    I Am My Brothers Keeper

  11. Quote Originally Posted by SFreed View Post
    I don't have an issue with the swearing. I have a huge issue with you feeling the need to tell someone's kids that their parents are ".......a fat ****ing slob who has mental issues and can't lift worth ****." WTH gives you the right to do that???
    Agree.

  12. There are a few good posts above, be there to support them and if they wish, to help them.
    Obesity and depression are self feeding and when a person has both they'll feed one another and it's a downward spiral.

    Depression, low self esteem etc as causes of obesity, all true. It's also the case that some people are reluctant to believe how shallow the world is. Some people are reluctant to believe that people will be nicer to them if they looked better. Some people are reluctant to believe that being skinnier is correlated to looking better. This being the 21st century, most people were brought up being told they should love themselves for who they are. Perhaps even if they're fat, shallow, judgemental etc. Some of these things are difficult to challenge or point out as they are ugly truths and people don't like to talk about them.
    A few things to consider

  13. Okay.. my 0.2 here..

    1) Get a life
    2) Get a F***ing life
    3) Stop being a judgemental piece of S#!T
    4) Try to be positive about life or just in general
    5) Help people (or at least try to) to whatever extend you can. I am sure that’s going to be hard for you to do.
    6) why don’t write a diary.
  14. Who here has in laws that are fat and out of shape?


    I’m curious. All the recovering alcoholics, food addicted members that posted in this thread. What people in your lives took it upon themselves to “help” and what exactly did they say to make you realize you had a problem that needed to be fixed? Everyone here is saying “help the guy” but not explaining “how”.

    Those writing about being “judgemental”, you don’t know anything about the OP. Aren’t you being judgemental as well?

    Also, is it possible that this hit a nerve for those here that are recovering from addiction? Sticking up for a fellow recovering addicted person because it reminds you of your past self?

    I’m looking for constructive suggestions because I also have family members that are food and alcohol addicted.
    May I suggest using this app to track your bloodwork tests:
    myBloodTracker for IPhone and IPad
    https://appsto.re/us/vvMndb.i

  15. Quote Originally Posted by u_e_s_i View Post
    There are a few good posts above, be there to support them and if they wish, to help them.
    Obesity and depression are self feeding and when a person has both they'll feed one another and it's a downward spiral.

    Depression, low self esteem etc as causes of obesity, all true. It's also the case that some people are reluctant to believe how shallow the world is. Some people are reluctant to believe that people will be nicer to them if they looked better. Some people are reluctant to believe that being skinnier is correlated to looking better. This being the 21st century, most people were brought up being told they should love themselves for who they are. Perhaps even if they're fat, shallow, judgemental etc. Some of these things are difficult to challenge or point out as they are ugly truths and people don't like to talk about them.
    A few things to consider
    Some people also learn to play the poor me card after they gain weight and learn to like that feeling. So they refuse to change. I believe my BIL falls in this category as well.

  16. Quote Originally Posted by kenpoengineer View Post
    I’m curious. All the recovering alcoholics, food addicted members that posted in this thread. What people in your lives took it upon themselves to “help” and what exactly did they say to make you realize you had a problem that needed to be fixed? Everyone here is saying “help the guy” but not explaining “how”.

    Also, those writing about being “judgemental”, you don’t know anything about the OP. Aren’t you being judgemental as well?
    Just to throw another $.02 in, I would argue that most of the posts calling the OP judgemenal are not necessarily in response to this thread per se but rather to the fact that well over half of the many threads he has started on this forum have been, at root, judgemental of those around him.

    To answer your first question as someone who recovered from an eating disorder,I would say the biggest help I received was from those family and friends who refused to be pushed away and were always there to emotionally support me as I struggled to beat my demons.
    Thanks be to God that no one (who mattered to me) behaved like the OP seems to want to. Sorry to say, but “telling it like it is” and “tough love” never really helps anyone.

    And if someone like him were to take it upon themselves to tell my kids all of my problems (as he seems to want to do for his brother In law) I am pretty sure it would not end well for that individual
  17. Who here has in laws that are fat and out of shape?


    Quote Originally Posted by kenpoengineer View Post
    I’m curious. All the recovering alcoholics, food addicted members that posted in this thread. What people in your lives took it upon themselves to “help” and what exactly did they say to make you realize you had a problem that needed to be fixed? Everyone here is saying “help the guy” but not explaining “how”.

    Those writing about being “judgemental”, you don’t know anything about the OP. Aren’t you being judgemental as well?

    Also, is it possible that this hit a nerve for those here that are recovering from addiction? Sticking up for a fellow recovering addicted person because it reminds you of your past self?

    I’m looking for constructive suggestions because I also have family members that are food and alcohol addicted.
    I’ll tell you one thing my family never did, they never give up on me or think I was a lost cause. Supported me through recovery when I never asked for anything..... sometimes just being there is helping.

  18. Quote Originally Posted by kenpoengineer View Post
    I’m curious. All the recovering alcoholics, food addicted members that posted in this thread. What people in your lives took it upon themselves to “help” and what exactly did they say to make you realize you had a problem that needed to be fixed? Everyone here is saying “help the guy” but not explaining “how”.

    Those writing about being “judgemental”, you don’t know anything about the OP. Aren’t you being judgemental as well?

    Also, is it possible that this hit a nerve for those here that are recovering from addiction? Sticking up for a fellow recovering addicted person because it reminds you of your past self?

    I’m looking for constructive suggestions because I also have family members that are food and alcohol addicted.
    The main thing for me was knowing that my family and friends were there for me when I was ready to make a change. They didn’t give up on me (and I gave plenty of reasons over the years).

    I was actually a drug addict (cocaine) and kicked that before realising I was an alcoholic as well - the alcohol took longer to beat. Over a 12 year period not once did I feel I had no where to turn, I was in a dark place for a lot of that but always had something there that I could cling too and that was people who had offered support.

    It was different people for the coke, drink and then finally the food but especially in the early days those people were 100% essential. The desire to change came from me but the ability to make it happen was significantly aided by the non judgemental support of those around me.

    You’ll note my comments above offering the op support whenever he is ready to change his approach to the world. If he has issues which make him take the approach he does to people I want him to know he has someone he can privately message to talk about it. Admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery......
  19. Who here has in laws that are fat and out of shape?


    Sorry, these are not constructive suggestions. What exactly does “being there for me” mean? How do you approach the “addict”? What do you do when they push you away?

    Quitting the addiction has to be physically and mentally excruciatingly hard to do. How, as a family member, do you convince the addict to stop the behavior?
    May I suggest using this app to track your bloodwork tests:
    myBloodTracker for IPhone and IPad
    https://appsto.re/us/vvMndb.i

  20. Quote Originally Posted by kenpoengineer View Post
    Sorry, these are not constructive suggestions. What exactly does “being there for me” mean? How do you approach the “addict”? What do you do when they push you away?
    Bro, you just need them to know you aren’t going anywhere and that ‘when they are ready’ you’ll help them.

    Sorry but there’s no approach which can instantly change an alcoholic or addict, for many of us we have to hit rock bottom first (that’s relative by the way, my view of rock bottom was being arrested for DUI and facing losing my wife and kids if I didn’t address my issues, for others it’s losing homes, jobs etc).

    You can try to ask some opening questions to give them an opening to talk to you but you can’t force it. Stuff like

    ‘Do you feel like sometimes your eating/drinking/drug taking gets on top of you?’

  21. So family members are supposed to wait for the addict to reach the low point? I personally have a hard time hearing this as I feel useless in helping them. I believe in proactive approaches to all problems in life and not waiting until things get so bad that it’s near or too late. This is totally frustrating.
    May I suggest using this app to track your bloodwork tests:
    myBloodTracker for IPhone and IPad
    https://appsto.re/us/vvMndb.i

  22. Quote Originally Posted by kenpoengineer View Post
    So family members are supposed to wait for the addict to reach the low point? I personally have a hard time hearing this as I feel useless in helping them. I believe in proactive approaches to all problems in life and not waiting until things get so bad that it’s near or too late. This is totally frustrating.
    Lol you are useless until you’re needed basically. Try force a situation and it 9 times out of 10 wont go your way. You could try to approach and say whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here to help you take the steps you want.... there’s no definitive answer to addictions.... you may be ‘proactive’ but a drug addict usually isn’t. Trying to force your way into other is just as bad as OPs thinking

  23. Quote Originally Posted by Juicedeez utz View Post
    Lol you are useless until you’re needed basically. Try force a situation and it 9 times out of 10 wont go your way. You could try to approach and say whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here to help you take the steps you want.... there’s no definitive answer to addictions.... you may be ‘proactive’ but a drug addict usually isn’t. Trying to force your way into other is just as bad as OPs thinking
    So addicts consider family members/friends interventions (yes, have to be “forced” as no addict is going to do it on their own accord) as a bad thing? Really? Rather than trying to help the addict you sit back and watch them hit the low point? Isn’t this heartless?
    May I suggest using this app to track your bloodwork tests:
    myBloodTracker for IPhone and IPad
    https://appsto.re/us/vvMndb.i

  24. No you’re being dumb about it. People don’t do **** if they’re forced to.... if you drag someone out and drop them in rehab or lock them in a house for a while, yeah it may work or they may end up resenting you for trying to control their life. Gotta look at it both ways. Either you try to force it and it works or you try to force it it doesn’t work and then they may hate you. It’s up to you if you wanna take that risk but if someone is truly going to destroy their lives, they’re going to do it regardless. I’ve still got a few friends who are addicts and I always say whenever you’re ready man I’m here to take the steps but I’m not gonna go and say look we need to sort you out now. All they would do is lie and try to avoid me, you know why? Because at that point the drugs are more important.

  25. Can we go back to food addiction per the original post. I know some will say addiction is addiction but how does a family member help someone with a FOOD addiction? Maybe the answer is nothing as you guys are saying already.
    May I suggest using this app to track your bloodwork tests:
    myBloodTracker for IPhone and IPad
    https://appsto.re/us/vvMndb.i
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