The most anabolic new discovery made possible by SCIENCE! - AnabolicMinds.com

The most anabolic new discovery made possible by SCIENCE!

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    Aeternitatis's Avatar
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    The most anabolic new discovery made possible by SCIENCE!


    Anabolic Log™: The most anabolic, molecularly-compounded log ever produced by science!


    Sourcing and processing the raw materials took over 157 years and spanned 4 generations of Nobel prize winning bionic scientists (obviously a project ahead of its time). Private funding for the project exceeded 575 million dollars drawing interest from such prestigious contributors as Bill Gates, Eddie Bauer, and Prince. The culmination of this multi-faceted effort results in:
    • 60% increase in lean muscle tissue
    • 42% increase in resting metabolism compared to controls
    • Upregulating clearance of muscle fatigue toxins
    • Massive gains within first day of use
    • Insane colon cleansing high fiber content
    • Resting hGH levels increased 78% leading to profound life extension
    • High tetra-amido macrocyclic ligand activator content (TAML's)


    How the most anabolic, molecularly-compounded log ever produced by science works:

    The main active compound in Anabolic Log™ is a chemical scientifically known as evotimberolanine™. Here is a picture of the active chemical evotimberolanine™ found in Anabolic Log™:



    As you can plainly see, the anabolic nature of the chemical is profound. At oxygen bond 13 and hydrogen bond 7, we discover that the chemicals anabolic nature stems not only from extreme affinity for the androgen receptor, but also by high antagonism of said receptor.

    • Increased NF-(kappa)B transcription
    • MyoD transciption surpassing the best myostatin inhibitors
    • Fox01, Fox03, and Fox04 upregulation increasing glucose disposal and immune response beyond anything ever seen


    It upregulates thyroid and leptin sensitivity as well as increasing lipolytic enzymes by 400%. It has thermogenic capabilities comparable to the notorious and ever famous synthetic chemical uncoupler known as DNP but without any of the life threatening side effects. The TAML's are remarkable at destroying fatigue toxins by accelerating the cleansing reactions with hydrogen peroxide. It is also in clinical testing for use as a cure in the treatment of 32 serious diseases including Lupus and Diabetes.

    I began supplementing with Anabolic Log™ and Chunky Monkey™ several weeks ago.

    I must say, the effects out perform even the most high dose testosterone enanthate/dianabol stack. Within five minutes I gained 35 pounds and my bench went up by 2 reps and 10 pounds. I lost 7% bodyfat and won the lottery. My girlfriend left me... but I found a hotter one who immaculately conceived the son of God. And I got a new boat.

    I give this supplement a 4/5 stars. I would've given it 5 stars, but it only comes in chocolate flavor.

    Thanks to the new Anabolic Log™ I am now able to compete in full contact origami. I have become a dynamic figure of my time, often seen base-jumping and crushing ice. I'm now known to remodel train stations during lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I wooed women with sensuous and godlike guitar playing. Suddenly, I can pilot Segways™ up severe inclines with daunting speed and cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in 18.5 minutes. I've become an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Brazil. I have come to enjoy bluegrass cello, and am the subject of numerous documentaries. I now can participate in suburban hang gliding.

    Now an abstract artist, I'm a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Specialists worldwide swoon over my newly created original line of evening-wear. Because of Anabolic Log™, my floral arrangements have earned me fame in worldwide botany magazines. Children trust me.

    I can now hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with incredible accuracy and read Paradise Lost, Moby ****, and Gone with the Wind in one day while still having time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I have recently performed several covert operations with the Spanish Inquisition. While on vacation in Florida I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small laundromat. The laws of physics no longer apply to me.

    Years ago, I had discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down (though it doesn't matter because I have found Log™). I've made extraordinary four course meals using only rice and a toaster oven because Anabolic Log™ increased my IQ by 300 points. I recently won bullfights in San Juan and cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka. I also played Hamlet and performed open-heart surgery while speaking telepathetically with aliens.

    ...all thanks to the new chocolate Anabolic Log™.
    MOTIV8 II Challenge
    -=The Big Squirrel Nut Swingers=-

  2. Elite Member
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    Someone has a bit toooo much time on his hands, eh?

  3. Snuggle Club™ mascot
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    Do any of the board sponcers have it yet? Will a generic version be available? Will this be included in the upcoming ban?









    EDIT: "It's lo-og it's lo-og, it's big, it's heavy it's wood! It's lo-og, it's lo-og, it's better than bad it's good!"
    Recent log:http://anabolicminds.com/forum/supplement-reviews-logs/213350-lean-efx-refined.html
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    You should be negitive repped for that sh*tty post Idunk.
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    Full contact origami LOL
  6. Registered User
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    Okay guys, this took me a long time. Don't you think it's worth at least one rep?

    And holy jesus is that a major dooky! LOL, who's crap is that freakin large?
    MOTIV8 II Challenge
    -=The Big Squirrel Nut Swingers=-
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aeternitatis
    Okay guys, this took me a long time. Don't you think it's worth at least one rep?

    And holy jesus is that a major dooky! LOL, who's crap is that freakin large?
    There ya happy!

    Not sure whos it is, but it was left in my toilet by a masked marauder!!!!
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    Anabolic Innovations will be doing a presale starting next week.


    CROWLER
    Sleep Supplement 3Z BCAA: Red Raspberry and Lemon flavors
    HGH/sleep enhancer: HGHpro
    Test Booster: TestoPRO and STOKED!
    Preworkout: MANIAC Fruit Punch and Pink Lemonade
  9. King Kong
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    Quote Originally Posted by CROWLER
    Anabolic Innovations will be doing a presale starting next week.


    CROWLER
    Dont worry Crowler, I got plenty more on the way if you need some extras.
  10. Elite Member
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    You sh*t waaaaaaaaaaaay too much Idunk. I can smell you all the way down here in the South!!
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    Quote Originally Posted by jmh80
    You sh*t waaaaaaaaaaaay too much Idunk. I can smell you all the way down here in the South!!
    You know it!!!

    Man I wish there was a smiley of a guy dropping a deuce!
  12. Elite Member
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    I found this one - which is HILARIOUS!




    This is good too.



    How about a pissing smiley?



    Here is Idunk knocking me DEAD with one of his farts!



  13. King Kong
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    Quote Originally Posted by jmh80
    I found this one - which is HILARIOUS!




    This is good too.



    How about a pissing smiley?



    Here is Idunk knocking me DEAD with one of his farts!



    Those are sweet!! Admin must have just added those!
  14. Elite Member
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    Idunk - thanks for the rep (I think it was you) and making me a Commie!

    Bobo - you can thank me later for posting those wonderful emoticons!
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    Yeah it was me.

    Whats the deal with the 'red star'?? Couldnt be something more american like a food stamp or something.
  16. Doctor Science
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    Look forget you guys. I just wanna know where I can get mine?
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    Hey woody, split
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    that is some funny/creative sh*t.
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    already tried it... dont work

    plus i think it gave me gyno
  20. Doctor Science
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    Quote Originally Posted by NickyNoNames
    already tried it... dont work

    plus i think it gave me gyno
    Yeah gave me gyno but it gave me good "wood" too
  21. Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by NickyNoNames
    already tried it... dont work

    plus i think it gave me gyno
    No, that's because you didn't use it correctly.

    It's a suppository.

    :redeemerw
    MOTIV8 II Challenge
    -=The Big Squirrel Nut Swingers=-
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    I thought a suppository is where you keep your money.
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    Quote Originally Posted by eisenmench
    I thought a suppository is where you keep your money.

    ewwww
  24. Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by eisenmench
    I thought a suppository is where you keep your money.
    That depends on how rich you are...
    MOTIV8 II Challenge
    -=The Big Squirrel Nut Swingers=-
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    lololol.. so I just saw this after posting my thread.. slightly different because of the points.. but ok... lol didn't think anyone else would have posted something kinda like this..
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