You know the situation better than anyone. But I Agree. It needs to be two way.She will not work out with me or around me, for some reason it makes her uncomfortable! We have been together for 10 years and have only been to the gym together 3 times! I did not put any pressure on her at the gym, I left her to do her own thing and told her if she needs help just let me know... So were that comes from is again, self esteem issue and its nothing I caused! Regardless of what this thread my sound like, the things you guys are saying about making for health and telling her she looks good... I do!!!! This is why I have been so frustrated, at this point its not me or what I need to do... This is about her, I cant make her happy! She needs to want to be happy and get in control of what she wants in life! I will be there to support her and help her, but if things dont change this will only go so far. I am hoping for the best, but I also realize that I do not deserve to be a pay check and a punching bag... Thats not a marriage should feel like!!!!