Douchebags at the gym...

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  1. What about people with bad breath? This is distgusting. I dont know how many times I have moved down a few machines while doing cardio to get away from the nasty odor emitting from the persons mouth next to me. They have to notice me moving down and wonder why?
    Also there is this littl old asian dude that stinks like he ate garlic cloves the night before, I dont know what it is but its nasty.


  2. Oh, ther is one woman in every morning in my gym in jeans, a blouse, and sandals just leasurly bikeing on a recumbant. Her hair is done her makup etc. looks like shes ready to head to work. Then to top it off shes been hanging on to one of those shake weight things while biking lately.

  3. Quote Originally Posted by ken22 View Post
    What about people with bad breath? This is distgusting. I dont know how many times I have moved down a few machines while doing cardio to get away from the nasty odor emitting from the persons mouth next to me.
    Maybe they're in ketosis?!
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  4. Quote Originally Posted by ken22 View Post
    Oh, ther is one woman in every morning in my gym in jeans, a blouse, and sandals just leasurly bikeing on a recumbant. Her hair is done her makup etc. looks like shes ready to head to work. Then to top it off shes been hanging on to one of those shake weight things while biking lately.
    I'd talk to her, it sounds like she may be interested in giving out handjobs.

    Why do old guys smell like poop?

  5. I'm writing my congressman about dudes hanging out naked in the locker room. There's two curtains on the shower and plenty of hooks in there for a reason. Also, underwear before socks!

    Another thing that I fail to understand is why women come to do cardio while doused in perfume. The old women are the worst. Today I almost had to call my thirty minutes on the elliptical early because some tubby lady next to me had bathed in White Shoulders. Vomiting in the gym is cool, but not for that reason.

  6. loud people inthe gym laughing and yelling and being ****ing child like.an hour and 30 mins of this retarded ****.wtf man really your at the gym to work out not be jack asses.I wanted to hit'em both inthe head with a 45lbs weight to shut'em up.......damn 24 hour cameras.

  7. Swimmer here.
    When old people take up lanes and wade back and forth moving styrofoam blocks.
    They take up the entire lane. Sharing is impossible.

    I hate sharing lanes anyways, but old people just kill it.

    Plus I hate every azzhole who loses a band aid in the pool.
    I pretty much hate any male over the age of 12 wearing a band aid. Seriously? Is it that bad of a wound? If it's a blood gushing wound you should have a gauze pad with medical tape. What the hell does that little band aid do other than make you look like a straight sissy. Then you have the nerve to let it float around in the pool.

    Oh, and toilet paper in the pool. Have you not mastered the art of wiping your azz throughout your entire life?

    I pretty much don't swim at the gym anymore unless it's really really late.

  8. Quote Originally Posted by CCV3 View Post
    Swimmer here.
    When old people take up lanes and wade back and forth moving styrofoam blocks.
    They take up the entire lane. Sharing is impossible.

    I hate sharing lanes anyways, but old people just kill it.

    Plus I hate every azzhole who loses a band aid in the pool.
    I pretty much hate any male over the age of 12 wearing a band aid. Seriously? Is it that bad of a wound? If it's a blood gushing wound you should have a gauze pad with medical tape. What the hell does that little band aid do other than make you look like a straight sissy. Then you have the nerve to let it float around in the pool.

    Oh, and toilet paper in the pool. Have you not mastered the art of wiping your azz throughout your entire life?

    I pretty much don't swim at the gym anymore unless it's really really late.
    public pools.
    ick.

  9. Don't know if it's been posted, way too many pages to read Hahah, but nerd guys lifting heavy with terrible technique and grunting. I'm talking a group of nerds all doing this while the die hards and real lifters look aesthetic and bigggg!
    drofwarc

  10. Quote Originally Posted by drofwarc View Post
    Don't know if it's been posted, way too many pages to read Hahah, but nerd guys lifting heavy with terrible technique and grunting. I'm talking a group of nerds all doing this while the die hards and real lifters look aesthetic and bigggg!
    Sh!t, I guess I'm a douchebag then When I'm in the rack with 405+lbs loaded on my shoulders, I can't help but grunt when I'm doing ass squats. The noise just comes out

  11. Quote Originally Posted by kanakafarian View Post
    Sh!t, I guess I'm a douchebag then When I'm in the rack with 405+lbs loaded on my shoulders, I can't help but grunt when I'm doing ass squats. The noise just comes out
    Uhh...
    Which end does the "noise" come out of?
    mw2012

  12. Quote Originally Posted by ImJ2x View Post
    Uhh...
    Which end does the "noise" come out of?
    That was what I was thinking. It's not rare for me to squeak one out while I'm doing squats.

  13. Quote Originally Posted by ImJ2x View Post
    Uhh...
    Which end does the "noise" come out of?
    Sometimes both! LOL

  14. Quote Originally Posted by kanakafarian View Post
    Sometimes both! LOL
    LMMFHWAO
    [hint: HW=hairy white]
    mw2012

  15. Quote Originally Posted by kanakafarian View Post
    Looks like one of my family reunions.
    mw2012

  16. Quote Originally Posted by ImJ2x View Post
    Looks like one of my family reunions.
    heall, that's my family!
    dad, left, mom next, brothers, the two messin around and me, on the right...
    yep, that's it alight!

    btw - where do you guys get those little animated smilie doods?
    especially the original one that moons you.
    awesome!

  17. Quote Originally Posted by jin View Post
    heall, that's my family!
    dad, left, mom next, brothers, the two messin around and me, on the right...
    yep, that's it alight!

    btw - where do you guys get those little animated smilie doods?
    especially the original one that moons you.
    awesome!
    Just google "smiley emoticon" or farting smiley, etc

  18. Ok, there is this one older brother that goes to my gym. He goes 2x a week and is always at the lat pull down machine. Not the nicer ones over in the free weights but the one with with two separate handles by all the other machines and cardio equipment.

    I see him when I'm warming up. He sits there and gyrates his hips to the porn music he is listening to for the full 10 minutes I warm up. Getting 1 set of 8 done in that time. Dude is hysterical! Most of his head is shaved except for on side and then it's braded. So a 4" round patch of 8" long hair. I don't know what it's supposed to be. I really need to get a vid of this guy... But i never bring my phone out of the locker room. Maybe someday cause words do not describe!

  19. I decided to mix it up a bit since it's time to shred down and join a boxing gym. Much better atmosphere than a workout gym. People are all legit. No one is really in "gym" shape except for me about 1 or 2 others but everyone is there to learn and burn cals.

    Plus half the class are college girls.

    So ya, that my life of gym douchebags has just been cut in half.
    It's good to mix it up once in a while.

  20. crack was very popular in his day

  21. Quote Originally Posted by Dizmal View Post
    Most of his head is shaved except for on side and then it's braded. So a 4" round patch of 8" long hair. I don't know what it's supposed to be.
    it hides the exit wound.

  22. Quote Originally Posted by kanakafarian View Post
    Sh!t, I guess I'm a douchebag then When I'm in the rack with 405+lbs loaded on my shoulders, I can't help but grunt when I'm doing ass squats. The noise just comes out
    Hahahah no but nerds doing this, I grunt but I take the piss it's even funnier when you count to ten in German like arnie
    drofwarc

  23. Quote Originally Posted by mich29 View Post
    loud people inthe gym laughing and yelling and being ****ing child like.an hour and 30 mins of this retarded ****.wtf man really your at the gym to work out not be jack asses.I wanted to hit'em both inthe head with a 45lbs weight to shut'em up.......damn 24 hour cameras.
    I experience this every time I hit up the public gym. Three dudes, all around 6 foot tall, couldn't weigh more than 185, all of them lift together and act like their workouts are so epic that everyone else is a lil beotch, and they throw down their 40 pound dumbells like they're 125's every time, and then slam them back in the rack, and stare at everyone. I like to stare back. Sometimes I can't contain myself and I laugh at them. Other times I like to stop and applaud them when they throw the weights down.

    I think next time you should throw that 45'er at those clowns.

  24. This guy with 'clown hair' ( a ring of hair around a bald head) just walks around the gym holding a paper towel. He also has a paper towel sticking out of his 1970's gym shorts.

    He wears a mesh athletic tank top with worn off numbers and striped socks up to his knees. One of his knees is wrapped in what appears to be a bloody ace bandage. I have never seen him attempt any type of physical activity in the gym but where ever he goes, he leaves a terrible stinch that lingers for what seems to be forever.

  25. The worst is the person who just lifts arms and does a little chest and shoulders and has no legs and looks horribly disproportional. The guy who takes orals for 2 months and then stops lifting while he comes off and then 2 montsh later goes on more orals and repeats the cycle and gets no gains.

  26. Quote Originally Posted by Husker89 View Post
    The worst is the person who just lifts arms and does a little chest and shoulders and has no legs and looks horribly disproportional. The guy who takes orals for 2 months and then stops lifting while he comes off and then 2 montsh later goes on more orals and repeats the cycle and gets no gains.
    Ron Ron?

  27. i knew a kid back in high school who ran a cycle of something oral
    can't remember
    wasn't into that sort of thing back then
    and DID NOT lift AT ALL.
    i remember tellin him,
    mike, you should lift weights and eat a lot right?
    let's watch pumping iron and see what arnold does...
    nope.
    dood was convinced the roids would do the work for him...
    dood never changed.
    drank a ton of beer the whole time, too.

  28. The c0ck blocker!! I just had one last night at the gym.

    So, I'm in the rack doing my squats and this chick comes up to me and asks, "how much weight is that?!" and when I'm about to reply, this douchebag wannabe in an undershirt 2 sizes too small interupts and says, "oh, that's 405lbs". And this girl continues her conversation with me while ignoring this douche but the guy just stands there staring at us as if he's a part of the convo. She and I both blow this guy off and don't even acknowledge that he's there. We spoke for a good 4-5 minutes before this clown finally got the clue and went back to doing seated calf raises with 45lbs! LOL

  29. This very day some guy comes up to me while I'm doing bent rows and says to make sure no one uses his bench while he goes and does whatever.

  30. Quote Originally Posted by rambo679 View Post
    This very day some guy comes up to me while I'm doing bent rows and says to make sure no one uses his bench while he goes and does whatever.
    i am not sure why
    busy
    gyms don't tie little white boards to the benches
    allowing 20 minutes to each signee.
    maybe with a wait 3 deep or something like that.

  31. I totally got crop dusted by this one fat gay dude today. I looked up with a wtf look on my face and he was just sitting their smiling... in what I'm guessing was his attempt to hit on me.
    Comic Sans makes me feel gangsta

  32. Quote Originally Posted by 2k1s View Post
    I totally got crop dusted by this one fat gay dude today. I looked up with a wtf look on my face and he was just sitting their smiling... in what I'm guessing was his attempt to hit on me.
    LOL hit on you by crop dusting?! I guess he was trying to claim his territory!

  33. This one is a few weeks old, some guy had the locker right below mine and was taking up all the space on the bench. I noticed that he was sitting their the entire time it took me to get my stuff, shower, etc and it looked like he was fevershly drying his one foot. Wondering what he was doing for so long I looked closer and realized he was scraping skin off his foot onto the floor for like 15 minutes and was still ped-egging it as I left.

  34. Quote Originally Posted by CCV3 View Post


    That was painful. F that chick. Physco

  35. Quote Originally Posted by bakerderek0 View Post


    That was painful. F that chick. Physco
    I'd still pee in her butt.
    Comic Sans makes me feel gangsta

  36. Quote Originally Posted by Vance View Post
    Hahahahah. I know just the type.

    He also has to grunt like Sharapova while doing lat pulldowns with 100 lbs and always lets all the weights slam down on his final rep just to make *sure* everyone in the building knows just how much of a **** he is.
    Don't forget about this guy screaming his rep count out at the top of his lungs while sweating so bad he looks like he just got done swimming!

  37. Quote Originally Posted by 2k1s View Post
    I totally got crop dusted by this one fat gay dude today. I looked up with a wtf look on my face and he was just sitting their smiling... in what I'm guessing was his attempt to hit on me.
    The dusting was probably his mating call

  38. I just joined another 24 hour gym and I am teaching spin at another gym, I have been plagued lately with large, hairy fat smelly women who smell like smoke and a bar and try to sit next to me while I am either riding a bike ( trying out a new spin routine) or while I am running on the treadmill, I am fast approaching my "you smell and your pissing me off" speech.


    TC
    RIP Ryan, :(
  

  
 

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