Help with love

[kwyckemynd00]

Totally agreed with you, Kwyck, but it’s not for Stephen to act that way. It means he’ll have to pretend something he is not. And if this one will run, somebody else won’t

Well, its not how lots of people are. In fact, the vast majority of people are entirely superficial for extended periods of time. That's why you learn 'new things' about your significant other for such long periods of time--that and you can't experience everything at once, of course.

She may be everything he sees in her and more, but he'll never know unless he plays the game.

Its unfortunate, but, it IS nothing more than a silly game.

 

[kwyckemynd00]

i think your trippin way to hard over this broad man, driving 200mi to show up at her classes without her permission when you've yet to meet her? Writing here those insane essays, man you are intense.

Didn't read all of that...driving 200mi? wow...

When a girl see's that she thinks obsessive. And, with all of the great hollywood flicks out there about obsession gone bad, girls flip. I'm not kiddin' either.

I understand where you're coming from--I'm a guy. I see your intent when doing things like driving 200mi to surprise her with a hello, or whatever. And, that would have been a wonderful gesture 100yrs ago (maybe even 50), but since then, that kind of guy has been entirely bastardized --thank you hollywood-- and girls freak out on that kind of stuff.

 

[DmitryWI]

Its unfortunate, but, it IS nothing more than a silly game.

Yep, and this is sucks. it's why I was dating women my age or older, a lot of 'em done playing games and know what they want. I wouldn't even go out with 19 year old(insert "liar") and waste my time unless I just want to get laid and nothing more.

 

[SOWarrior]

Chin up brother.

 

[Mrs. Gimpy!]

Can anyone guess why this makes me smile? It's rare; it isn't impossible. That's the magic of love. True love is rare, but it DOES exist. Only Hope can unlock the trussing that binds True Love. It's similar to faith. Only blind hope makes love and faith worth it, and that's all there is here really...a foo l's hope.

you will find true love . i think that the problem is that many people settle for a person that makes them "content"...not a "jump out of your seat " PERFECTION happy. my advice, dont settle for okay....because then you will never find your perfect love.

i understand what you mean by rare. its very rare to find someone like you did where you both can carry conversation with (souinds simple, but its not). but there will be someone better for you if this one doesnt work oiut. im glad that you are looking better

 

[TheCrownedOne]

you will find true love . i think that the problem is that many people settle for a person that makes them "content"...not a "jump out of your seat " PERFECTION happy. my advice, dont settle for okay....because then you will never find your perfect love.

i understand what you mean by rare. its very rare to find someone like you did where you both can carry conversation with (souinds simple, but its not). but there will be someone better for you if this one doesnt work oiut. im glad that you are looking better

Truer words have ne'er been spoken. Seriously.

You're more than a breath of fresh air, Mrs. Gimpy, you're a blessing in the best way. Like I told you before, I hope you have someone be as kind to you as you have been to me. God bless you, my friend

 

[TheCrownedOne]

i think your trippin way to hard over this broad man, driving 200mi to show up at her classes without her permission when you've yet to meet her? Writing here those insane essays, man you are intense.

Stephen
Comes on strong, goes down smooth​

​

I'll go ahead and preempt this by saying that it's going to sound pretentious, but I have copious circumstance to back it up.​

I've been told that there is something about meeting me in person that is very...special. I'm only going by what people have told me and how they've reacted, but something happens when people meet me face to face that opens them up to me like nothing else could. I guess maybe I have this "air" about me that is so friendly and comfortable. People always tell me they feel like they can talk to me about anything, even if we've just met. I don't know what it is, but it's there, and I guess that's why I was on this kick about meeting her. I kept thinking, "it's happened every time before. Meet her face to face, and you'll be set." I still want to go there, but I'm not going to.

 

[Mrs. Gimpy!]

Like I told you before, I hope you have someone be as kind to you as you have been to me. God bless you, my friend

anytime you know where you can reach me (if you want, i'll give you my email)...

my kwycke is that "kind someone" . i am (if you can not tell, a hopeless romantic, as you are) and he is my PERFECT LOVE. i wish nothing but the best for you. stay sweet, but cautious. never compromise or settle for less than perfect happiness

 

[TheCrownedOne]

Didn't read all of that...driving 200mi? wow...

When a girl see's that she thinks obsessive. And, with all of the great hollywood flicks out there about obsession gone bad, girls flip. I'm not kiddin' either.

I understand where you're coming from--I'm a guy. I see your intent when doing things like driving 200mi to surprise her with a hello, or whatever. And, that would have been a wonderful gesture 100yrs ago (maybe even 50), but since then, that kind of guy has been entirely bastardized --thank you hollywood-- and girls freak out on that kind of stuff.

More great words. "Bastardized" is very fitting Thanks Kwyck.

 

[kwyckemynd00]

Just wanted to help out AM.com's Ebullient Bloviating Jubilare

 

[TheCrownedOne]

It is a work in progress. Excuse the mess.

My poor, poor pen, I run him dry.
My heart, it fears, will make him die.

There is too little paper,
And far too little ink,
And far, far too little time
To fully sit and think
Of all the ways that I care,
Of all the ways you don't,
Of all the time I've wasted,
Of all the time you won't.

My heart is broken for you,
My heart has split in two.
Your heart is still together -
There's nothing wrong with you.

You take my days and my time;
You give me none of yours.
Your words remain unwritten;
My words are open doors.

I sent them out: they came back
Without an olive branch.
It seems your tree has withered -
I never had a chance.

The world shall pall of my cries:
Friends shall aweary grow.
I am certain that the bed
Of my love shall be snow.

So I will go and live my life,
And always wonder why
The girl I loved ran away
And left me here to cry.

 

[kwyckemynd00]

Excuse me, its a work in progress...

She's young,
she's tripping,
and you need to chill out b/c that midn of yours is slippin

Obsessing over this whole thing isn't going to make anything better, bud.

Okay, think about this. You think she's so special, YET, she doesn't even have the courtesy to respond to the guy she led on and obviously hurt. She could easily say "I'm sorry, I'm not ready for this, we need to go our separate ways." That should be very easy, especially since your primary means of communication is online! Why are you wasting your time hurting over someone who if she were your significant other, AND she were acting in this manner, you'd be angry / displeased, not heart broken.

She is not exhibiting very desireable qualities, bud. You're much too nice of a guy to waste your time with her, and I would assume you're much too smart of a guy to waste your time heart-aching over a girl who is not acting in a manner that is consistent with what you would like in a person.

I'm sorry, but you really need to just get over it, asap. just go out, be with people, talk, and all will be well.

 

[BigCasino]

Excuse me, its a work in progress...

She's young,
she's tripping,
and you need to chill out b/c that midn of yours is slippin

Obsessing over this whole thing isn't going to make anything better, bud.

Okay, think about this. You think she's so special, YET, she doesn't even have the courtesy to respond to the guy she led on and obviously hurt. She could easily say "I'm sorry, I'm not ready for this, we need to go our separate ways." That should be very easy, especially since your primary means of communication is online! Why are you wasting your time hurting over someone who if she were your significant other, AND she were acting in this manner, you'd be angry / displeased, not heart broken.

She is not exhibiting very desireable qualities, bud. You're much too nice of a guy to waste your time with her, and I would assume you're much too smart of a guy to waste your time heart-aching over a girl who is not acting in a manner that is consistent with what you would like in a person.

I'm sorry, but you really need to just get over it, asap. just go out, be with people, talk, and all will be well.

See this is why I love this Kwyckey mofo! Nothin but straight shootin' and good advice. Seeing you post quality stuff like this makes me feel better you had me sign that contract agreeing to adopt Gimpy in the event some tragedy should befall you :cheers:

TCO, listen to Kwyckey, he speaketh the truth! Writing poems about her is not a way of getting over it, its a way of devoting more time to an issue that has a serious case of Old Yeller syndrome. Now, the next words I want to hear out of your mouth are "Yeller's my dog ma, I'll do it", and take this dog of an issue out back and put it out of its misery.

Don't worry, you will find someone that is right for you, that has that same great connection, when the time is right. Take care and God bless.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

By no means am I obsessing over this anymore. I write poetry all the time - it's what I do. Visit my Myspace page, and you'll see how often I write (however, I don't post everything I write). But she messaged me tonight saying she isn't ignoring me, she just hasn't had much free time recently. And I know that's true because she used to be online a lot, but recently she only gets on for a few minutes. I'm not moping around about this: I'm not staying in all the time waiting for the phone to ring. Life has continued to function as normal. But I'm not closing the book on her or this. Okay, so she isn't acting "perfectly." Well, so what. I make mistakes all the time, and my friends are gracious enough to forgive me. I'm not going to throw away the great thing we've still got between us just because she isn't giving me all of her time. You know that's going too far, Kwyck.
You guys have to understand how scared she was. I mean she was REALLY scared. She fell hard and she fell fast way before she was ready, so the only thing she knew to do was go away for a bit. It's been too hard for her to talk to me, and I understand that. Like I said before, I'm not in the same place I was at the start of this, but I've by no means shut her out, and I'm not going to. I just don't think that's fair.

 

[BigCasino]

You guys have to understand how scared she was. I mean she was REALLY scared. She fell hard and she fell fast way before she was ready, so the only thing she knew to do was go away for a bit. It's been too hard for her to talk to me, and I understand that. Like I said before, I'm not in the same place I was at the start of this, but I've by no means shut her out, and I'm not going to. I just don't think that's fair.

I like you man. You're a cool character. You always make me think of that song "King Without a Crown". You do what you got to do bro. Keep us posted.

 

[Mrs. Gimpy!]

But I'm not closing the book on her or this. Okay, so she isn't acting "perfectly."

I'm not going to throw away the great thing we've still got between us just because she isn't giving me all of her time.

You guys have to understand how scared she was. I mean she was REALLY scared. She fell hard and she fell fast way before she was ready, so the only thing she knew to do was go away for a bit. It's been too hard for her to talk to me, and I understand that.

It makes sense to me the "scared" issue. i dont doubt that she "does" care about you. you are such an understand nice guy. has she talked to you on the phone yet? you deserve a decent, person to person conversation about the whole sitution with her at the very least. you deserve that at the very very least, if she hasnt or wont, than its very inconsiderate of her. hang in there though buddy. im glad to see that you are doing better.

 

[jmh80]

I'm not sure if she was scared, or just flat weirded out.

I had a very similar situation happen my frosh year of college.
It was after that situation that I learned nice guys just get shat on much too often with women.

I'm quite sure you came on too strong with the "nice guy talk too much" persona.
I know I did.

My advice from having lived it - give up, her attitude and mindset about you has now changed forever.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

It makes sense to me the "scared" issue. i dont doubt that she "does" care about you. you are such an understand nice guy. has she talked to you on the phone yet? you deserve a decent, person to person conversation about the whole sitution with her at the very least. you deserve that at the very very least, if she hasnt or wont, than its very inconsiderate of her. hang in there though buddy. im glad to see that you are doing better.

Thank you for the compliment

Until last night, I had not had any contact with her since she wrote that blog. Last night I sent her a text message saying, "Thanks for the subscription" because she subscribed to my blog.

I guess maybe you could count the following as "contact." After she wrote that blog I noticed that she had edited the one preceding it. It originally said,
-----------------------------------------------------------------
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Hm.. it's weird. And almost in describable...

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]But I think i am falling....[/FONT]
And I'm scared- I'm really scared.
​

[/FONT]-----------------------------------------------------------------
And I noticed that she later appended,

-----------------------------------------------------------------
::edit:: I can't fall. I won't let myself.
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Anyway, her return text message said,

You are welcome. And I WILL write you back when I'm online long enough to...I haven't been ignoring you.​

My friend told me not to write anything back, so I didn't.
The thing is, she has been ignoring me, although I know she checks my blog. All I want is to talk to her about it on the phone so at least I have a better handle on what's going on. I don't want to talk her into anything, I just want to listen. Hopefully she'll give me that chance.

What I really wish is that I had someone close to her on my side, someone to appeal to her for me, someone to simply say, "hey, why don't you just talk to him." But I've got nothing. Anyway...going to a friend's house to watch SAW 2.

My initials are SAW

Have a good night, everyone. Enjoy the remainder of your weekend. Thanks again, Mrs. Kwyck

 

[Mrs. Gimpy!]

Last night I sent her a text message saying, "Thanks for the subscription" because she subscribed to my blog.

I guess maybe you could count the following as "contact."

noo...thats not contact.... there was a time when i didnt value the men i dated (before kwycke).... but i always made a point to give them an honest answer as to why i did not want to see them for the time being. its a simple courtesy. i hope that if ever i was to be left, that that person would give me a real conversation instead of leaving me hanging or with "loose ends". its not fair that shes ignoring you and making excuses. a phone call takes 5 minutes.

about the nice guy thats too nice ....its true, but once a relationship is already established.the sweet, complete openess is what makes the relationship work. too much too soon is a bit scary. kwyck and i took 7 months to say i love you....

 

[kwyckemynd00]

I'm not going to throw away the great thing we've still got between us just because she isn't giving me all of her time. You know that's going too far, Kwyck.

Oh, don't throw it away, and don't do anything that would damage the whole situation. I wouldn't recommend that by any means.

However, my personal fear (for you) is that you don't understand what seems to be going down, which will leave you pretty unprepared for the worst case scenario.

Again, most of us have been there/done that, and this type of behavior is always the first sign of 'the end'.

I hope I'm wrong though. Best of luck, and I would like to see the situation prove me wrong. Just please prepare for the opposite, for your sake.

 

[jmh80]

I say that she's moved on.

I think that your posts don't reflect your true feelings.
I think you are putting too much daily thought and energy into this girl.
And she's removed all her thought and energy from you. That's not healthy.

Just trying to be realistic here bro - but it seems to me that when a woman has made her mind up, there ain't no changin' it.
Bottom line - go looking for another fish.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

noo...thats not contact.... there was a time when i didnt value the men i dated (before kwycke).... but i always made a point to give them an honest answer as to why i did not want to see them for the time being. its a simple courtesy. i hope that if ever i was to be left, that that person would give me a real conversation instead of leaving me hanging or with "loose ends". its not fair that shes ignoring you and making excuses. a phone call takes 5 minutes.

about the nice guy thats too nice ....its true, but once a relationship is already established.the sweet, complete openess is what makes the relationship work. too much too soon is a bit scary. kwyck and i took 7 months to say i love you....

"Not fair" is a recompense I've grown all too familiar with. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to bother me like it used to. I just don't mind it as much when someone does me wrong. I enjoy forgiving people because I know it makes God proud, but at the same time I know I have to walk a fine line between being forgiving and being a doormat. That line, to me, is just too fine.

I'm sure that if things don't change then it won't be long before that part of me that longs for her will die. But I'd rather let time do the work and let it pass from me than risk making a big mistake trying to remove it myself.

She never said don't call me, so I wonder what would happen if I put it out there with a quick call one day? I don't know whether that is a total idiot thing to do right now, so I'll just hold off on that for a while.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

Oh, don't throw it away, and don't do anything that would damage the whole situation. I wouldn't recommend that by any means.

However, my personal fear (for you) is that you don't understand what seems to be going down, which will leave you pretty unprepared for the worst case scenario.

Again, most of us have been there/done that, and this type of behavior is always the first sign of 'the end'.

I hope I'm wrong though. Best of luck, and I would like to see the situation prove me wrong. Just please prepare for the opposite, for your sake.

I don't know if I'm completely unprepared. You guys probably can't gather this from my posts here, but I am trying to keep things in some sort of true perspective. I guess I'm just the type of person who hates to quit ANYTHING. I have this fear that things will only fail the moment I stop trying, so I tend not to give up. I still believe in happy endings...

I think if she just came to me one day soon and said "I'm done with this," then I'd be disappointed but not so terribly heartbroken as I would have been a while ago.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

I say that she's moved on.

I think that your posts don't reflect your true feelings.
I think you are putting too much daily thought and energy into this girl.
And she's removed all her thought and energy from you. That's not healthy.

Just trying to be realistic here bro - but it seems to me that when a woman has made her mind up, there ain't no changin' it.
Bottom line - go looking for another fish.

No one really knows exactly what she feels or thinks except her. I don't see the point in quitting before things have been set in stone.

Sure there are plenty of other fish out there, but you may as well say that to anyone who is unhappy with their relationship. "Quit this and go try again with someone new." Nobody wants to do that, and unless it has been proven to be absolutely necessary for me to move on, then I'm waiting to see what may unfold. Now, if someone interesting comes along then of course I won't pass it up, but I'm not leaving this unless I have to.

 

[The Experiment]

Why are you still talking about her and talking to her? It does you no good.

She's not interested in dating you.

I repeat, she's not interested in dating you.

I'll say it one more time, just for clarification: she's not interested in dating you.

We've all been there. We've all fallen for some girl, been so sugary sweet that when a girl politely tells you off, you refuse to believe it. The only time you get it through your head is when she has to forcefully tell you that she doesn't want to be with you.

She just doesn't want to tell you straight up because she wants you to leave her with your dignity intact.

Leave her be. Oh and just in case you forgot:

She's not interested in dating you.

 

[jmh80]

Cosigned @ The Experiment.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

Why are you still talking about her and talking to her? It does you no good.

She's not interested in dating you.

I repeat, she's not interested in dating you.

I'll say it one more time, just for clarification: she's not interested in dating you.

We've all been there. We've all fallen for some girl, been so sugary sweet that when a girl politely tells you off, you refuse to believe it. The only time you get it through your head is when she has to forcefully tell you that she doesn't want to be with you.

She just doesn't want to tell you straight up because she wants you to leave her with your dignity intact.

Leave her be. Oh and just in case you forgot:

She's not interested in dating you.

So what is this based on, exactly? Because she isn't talking to me? Explain.

 

[DmitryWI]

I wanted to stay out of it, but I don't understand why are you all so sure she's not interested, it might be complete opposite and she's just scared because she was hurt before?

 

[Mrs. Gimpy!]

she hasnt even given you the respect or decency of one phone call. its not worth it. you shouldnt be the only one trying to make a relationship work. there is nothing wrong with believing in happy endings, and there are, but maybe your happy ending isnt with this girl. shes not ready right now, and if its meant to be, then shell come back to you. as i mentioned before, im as big of a romantic as you are, so i mean this all because i worry about you, not just because i want to crush your hopes .

 

[TheCrownedOne]

she hasnt even given you the respect or decency of one phone call. its not worth it. you shouldnt be the only one trying to make a relationship work. there is nothing wrong with believing in happy endings, and there are, but maybe your happy ending isnt with this girl. shes not ready right now, and if its meant to be, then shell come back to you. as i mentioned before, im as big of a romantic as you are, so i mean this all because i worry about you, not just because i want to crush your hopes .

I know you're right, and I know you aren't trying to crush my hopes. The truth is that this isn't fair - I can't deny that. I sent a reply to her text message from last night where I said, "why write when you or I can call and talk for five minutes?"
She responded with, "homework."

Nice.

So I wrote her last night. This is it:

-------------------------------------
Time is a valuable thing, so I'm not going to waste much of yours. Everyone keeps telling me to move on and totally forget about you. They say this isn't fair to me, how you just disappeared and won't take a minute or two to just tell me what in the world is going to happen. They say, "a five minute phone call isn't asking too much, even of someone very busy." And their right.
I agree with them: I don't think this is very fair. Granted, we were just two people who became fast friends and were talking to each other without agenda, but since when is it okay to throw friends away? Courtesy is courtesy, and it hurts me because I never got the impression that you were an inconsiderate person. I'm not saying that you are an inconsiderate person, I'm just saying. I don't know about you, but like I said before I never set out to be your boyfriend or anything like that. I only wanted to be a good friend to you.
A part of me says, "leave her alone and don't send this message or she'll close the book on you and leave your cheese in the wind." Another part of me says, "have some self-respect - a five minute phone call isn't too much to ask."

So I'm going to ask you a question. Don't worry, it's nothing overly complicated, but no less important because of that.

I need to know what YOU WANT me to do - Stay or Leave?​

You said yourself,
I hope we can still talk and be friends like we have.

Well, I don't know what to think because I'm the only one trying to be a friend.

I know you're busy. I know that. I know you have a lot of tests and homework, but come on, I thought we were friends. Who doesn't have five minutes? I know you wouldn't treat your best friend this way: I know you wouldn't leave her hanging. And I hope you know I would never leave you hanging either. I also hope this doesn't make you angry with me because that's the last thing I want. But I also want you to know how I feel, whether you care or not.

Go in peace. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Your friend,
Stephen
-------------------------------------

She read it and hasn't replied. *sigh* So I've decided that I am going to wait two weeks and call. Until then, no blogs for her to read, no messages, nothing for two weeks. If she answers or calls me back, okay. If she doesn't, then that's it - I'm done.

You just refuse to bend,
so I keep bending till I break.
-Staind

Flame away, Experiment

 

[JonesersRX7]

:trout: you deserve the trout after sending her that.

I mean.. damn... "I'll call in two weeks" ....

DOOD!!! You will NOT call in 2 weeks... you will get her out of your mind right now!!!!!

Do you want us to sick a Beezle on you! This is going to stop now and you are going to get her out of your mind. Go do something you enjoy weather it be writing.. bike riding... a movie with friends... but what ever you do you do not think about her, talk about her... write about her.

It's honestly painful to see someone like this who I do not even know.. but I do know you are better than some 19yr old chicadee that can only respond "homework"

 

[TheCrownedOne]

:trout: you deserve the trout after sending her that.

I mean.. damn... "I'll call in two weeks" ....

DOOD!!! You will NOT call in 2 weeks... you will get her out of your mind right now!!!!!

Do you want us to sick a Beezle on you! This is going to stop now and you are going to get her out of your mind. Go do something you enjoy weather it be writing.. bike riding... a movie with friends... but what ever you do you do not think about her, talk about her... write about her.

It's honestly painful to see someone like this who I do not even know.. but I do know you are better than some 19yr old chicadee that can only respond "homework"

:rofl: You're a reason why this place is great.

I know everybody here wants to knock the crap out of me for being such a tool. I know But I don't know what to tell you guys. It is easier said than done to stop caring about someone.

Am I really not allowed to call in two weeks?? :hammer:

 

[CROWLER]

Your first post you asked for honesty. I gave it to you the very first day and you didn't like it. Kind of ironic how you got the notion that I was telling you not to care for someone after I spent half an hour writing a posts trying to help YOU.

Now here we are 5 pages later and everyone is giving you the same advice I did way back then.

BTW, who knows women the best other women right? Well 1 women board member gave me rep points for that post and 2 others contacted me and said it was right on and you will just get more hurt by chasing this girl.

I have 5 older sisters, I was raised by 2 women and I have a college age daughter, believe me when I tell you I have experience with women and how they think.

Best of luck to you and hope you get everything out of this relationship you want.

Just my 2 cents.


CROWLER

 

[kwyckemynd00]

Unfortunately, people almost entirely need to learn the hard way, right? I just went through this with my little bro. WE knew his chick (of 5 yrs) was a POS, and she finally tore his heart out and now he 'finally' gets it. lol.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

Secretly, I just want to keep everyone interested in my business and be the center of attention
I'm kidding...well, sort of

It isn't that I'm not listening to you guys. But think about it from my perspective. Everyone says, "forget it bro - no hope, no chance." But they don't have to deal with the niggling doubts like, "how do they really know it's over? What if they're wrong and you screw up bigtime, spending the remainder of your life kicking yourself in the face because of it?"

This is the best I can do. Two weeks is the best I've got in me. I can't just quit; I have to set a deadline for myself. So ya'll can go on thinking I'm nuts, but it wouldn't change anything if I shut her out now rather than two weeks from now. I'd still be doing the same things I'm doing now. If I am inspired to write something - regardless of what or whom it's about - I'm going to write it. If anything, this experience has done me well seeing as how it has inspired my writing and sketching. So for that I am grateful, and I am also very grateful to every one of you who continue to follow this thread and give me your opinions. Just because I'm not following your advice doesn't mean I'm not listening and appreciating it. So thanks again, friends.

 

[DmitryWI]

As much as I love happy endings, I was wrong about this one. But 2 weeks? Man, next time I’m in Alabama I will kick your ass for sure. FORGET ABOUT HER. Only month ago YOU told all these things, after me and Shannon break up, move on, forget about her, blah, blah, blah. And now you are doing opposite of what you told me. And I’ve been with her for 1.5 years, man, that’s it I’m kicking your ass. You know better!

 

[unitas27]

Just let it go, it wasn't meant to be. Maybe, just maybe, she will contact you when she's ready.

Another thing you could try is "let's just be friends" that way she won't feel the pressure of a relationship.

 

[DmitryWI]

Just let it go, it wasn't meant to be. Maybe, just maybe, she will contact you when she's ready.

Another thing you could try is "let's just be friends" that way she won't feel the pressure of a relationship.

Umm, you need to re-read this whole thread.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

In my defense, last night I was so close to just calling it quits completely, but something happened and I decided to sleep on it. Big mistake...or maybe not, I don't know.

I had a dream. I dreamed of her for the very first time, and it was more real than what I'm doing right now. She had driven to see me unexpectedly. I couldn't believe it. She had been ignoring me, yet there she was. So we went to eat with my best friend, and, although she was somewhat distant, I talked to her as much as possible. Slowly, she opened up and we had a great time talking and laughing. It was heaven.
Ater eating, we went to my best friend's house, and all the people we usually hang out with were there. By this time she had totally opened up to me, and we were being very affectionate, but it was nothing sexual because that isn't what this is about. I asked her what happened. I asked her what had changed her mind. She said, "because I came and met you in person."

I've never woken up more happy and more depressed at the same time. It was hell. I woke up thinking, "see?! That's why you should go down there!" But I know that more than likely that won't help anything.

The two weeks idea came from my safety supervisor at work. She was telling me about a very similar situation with her and her husband, and she said that while they weren't together he would call every 2 to 2.5 weeks to check on her and keep himself in her thoughts.

I'm tired of talking about this. I'm glad ya'll care enough to follow this and give me your advice: I truly appreciate it. But whether I end it today or not, I'll still be miserable. So I'm going to go be miserable elsewhere for a while.

I'll see you guys on the other side.

 

[refrieddreams]

Holy crap man...

Just the fact that you comunicate with her through blogs:blink: , text messages:blink: , I.M.s :blink: , and myspace:blink: , shows the imaturity of her.

Let her go me a kid man, do not feed her ego anymore. PLEASE!!

 

[The Experiment]

So what is this based on, exactly? Because she isn't talking to me? Explain.

What have I based it on? Reality.

If a girl really wants to go out with you, trust me, she'd make herself available. If she wasn't, she'd be more than willing to talk it out with you to find that one moment of time where she's free. She ducks your e-mails and when she replies (note: she replies because she feels cornerned, guilty, or might think you haven't got the hint yet), she makes vague references and then disappears.

So I've decided that I am going to wait two weeks and call

I give up. Seriously.

But whether I end it today or not, I'll still be miserable. So I'm going to go be miserable elsewhere for a while.

I'll see you guys on the other side.

End what? There's nothing there to speak of.

Those last few sentences are pretty damn disturbing also; unless the other side means something else other than death. Just trying to look out for you and to remind you that if you are thinking of doing it, she's not even close to being worth it.

 

[kwyckemynd00]

So I'm going to go be miserable elsewhere for a while.

I'll see you guys on the other side.

Its not the end of the world.

And, its not her you're missing, its rejection that is killing you. Trust me, you'll realize it later on. We all realize it--this was the same experience almost every guy goes through at one point in their life. How you deal with it / learn from it now is what counts!

You need to be HONEST with yourself and with your view of who she REALLY is. Its obvious that she isn't everything you thought she was--NOT EVEN CLOSE! Given that, why would you bother to feel this way about someone who wasn't anything you thought she was? You didn't care about HER, you cared about a person you THOUGHT was her, a person who doesn't exist. You fell in love with a GHOST! Think about it...

 

[jmh80]

I give up. I guess the experiences of 10-15 guys in similar situations ain't enough. It's up to you weather you want to listen and believe us.

Good luck. I see you'll have to learn it yourself.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

Those last few sentences are pretty damn disturbing also; unless the other side means something else other than death.

Indeed they do. Give me a little more credit than that, ****. I meant the other side of this situation.

 

[The Experiment]

Indeed they do. Give me a little more credit than that, ****. I meant the other side of this situation.

Its just that I had a friend who said similar stuff to that post you made. Nobody paid any attention to what he said and assumed it wasn't a big deal. Two months later, he shot himself in the face.

Just looking out for you is all.

 

[TheCrownedOne]

I appreciate it.

 

[Rictor33]

"bad luck in relationships" "dated the worst of the worst". There is a good chance she isn't going to be interested in you as any more than a friend. Many girls who have these experiences continue to date *******s. A problem you might have made, of course this is purely speculation is that in being open with her and there for her you ruined your chance to create mystery about you and therefore she became less interested in you. Women need a challenge and unfortunatley being "nice" and "open" isn't a challenge for them. Women date "*******s" because they are a challenge, because they don't give a **** or appear to. Same goes with anyone, people want what they cant have and once they get something or too much of it it soon loses it's luster. Just view this as a learning experience. Take the lesson you learned as positive and move on with that lesson. Go look up some dating e-books or something, they will explain to you what you've done wrong and how to fix it. I can tell you are inexperienced with women, and being 22 thats ok man. What doesnt kill you will only make you stronger. Our society with all the movies and fairy tales about how love works and music about broken hearts are written by pussies who have no idea without money/fame how to get a girl (or a few girls) and keep her (them). Go out and make it a point to meet girls man, you can do it, any man even an ugly guy can bag a decent-looking girl if they plays his cards right and tries enough times.

 

[4everbulking]

i think you're better off without her plain and simple in the mean time go out and get laid

 

[kwyckemynd00]

Many girls who have these experiences continue to date *******s.

Very true...there is something about the ******* that chicks just seem to love. Almost every guy learns this, its like 'the secret'...its almost a technique you have to develop in order to get chicks, its really funny. As the nice guy, you get hurt. As the *******, you get all the chicks. Its disgusting, really. I'll never understand why almost every girl I've ever met says they 'want a nice guy' but always turn the nice guy away for the *******.

edit: But, in order to keep the girl, you've got to ditch the ******* after a couple of months or else they get sick of it. They're 'attracted to *******s' but they want their *******s to be nice guys. :rofl:

 

[jmh80]

Man, this curse filter is making everything suck around here.