Help!! My gf is doing it all wrong...

[Sinate]

Hey there-


My girlfriend has some issues with her weight. They are all for not because she is freaking thin and has a fantastic body; but I know girls are "weird" about this kind of thing.


So anyway she wants to just loose some weight....She is very short, very short, andonly weighs around 100 pnds.


She wants to get back down to 90. She has always had HORRIBLE eating habbits i.e. eating only 2 small meals a day.


I always tell her how to properly eat to loose weight, and that she needs to actually excersise and she will see pounds come off naturally no problem!


So anyway she kept going about it her way and shes not loosing weight. She brought up taking diet pills to me. I kept pointing out the basic facts about stimulants to her, and she would hear them-

She kept telling me how her sister takes them and lost 2 pounds in one day! (Which i tried to explain to her was water weight and waste lol)


Anyway!!


Someone PLEASE explain to my girlfriend the basic rules of dieting, and help her realize how off her eating plan is. I figure maybe if she gets more indepth experienced outside opinions she will listen up a bit more. (Providing scientific date is encouraged as well)


So, thanks much in advance!

 

[flytrapcan]

No scientific data in this post.

My gf is about 5ft 3 and weighs 114. She started her dieting at about 122 - 124. Actually we both started and it's been fantastic and easy. We decided on a low carb diet. She eats smaller meals, actual MEALS, through out the day and a good supper to end the day. Oh and of course we have a treat at night, that can be frozen yogurt or jello. On the weekends we allow a meal on sat and sun that totally break the low carb rules - it helps to have your little cheats.

My gf loves to workout and personally I think if a woman is gonna be small she should at least be in shape, and at 114 she has great muscle tone and very visible abs.

From what I know eating only twice a day is unhealthy and will cause your body to retain fat, it thinks it is starving and wants to protect itself. Multiple smaller meals is better, like 4 -5 meals a day. I'm pretty sure she is eating at least 120 grams of protein /day and getting about 1500 calories.

OK now bring on the experts.

 

[jminis]

Two meals a day is a great way to lose muscle and water not fat. Her body will think it's starving itself and will be stubborn as hell to release any stored bodyfat. No need for scientific data, this is common, basic knowledge. I drill this into my clients heads everyday. The ones that listen accomplish their goals the ones that don't, well don't.

 

[RenegadeRows]

Tell her that by starving herself she is gaining weight. Her metabolism slows down and wallah, she's heavier than before.

 

[flytrapcan]

This is from my gf.

My trick is eating something, mainly foods high in protein (nuts, protein cookies, muffins every 2-3 hours and I also have a cup of green tea every morning) and of course my tuna or salmon every day for lunch. Also eating a fairly light supper, having salad and meat 4-5 times per week helps, I think.

 

[jminis]

This is from my gf.

Eating every 2-3 hours is fine but she needs to have the small meals balanced. Too much protein and it can be stored away thus her gaining weight. She needs a balance of carbs, fats and protein. Only weighing 100lbs she doesn't need much but what she's eating is pretty healthy for her. Fish, nuts, salads.

 

[Leggo my Ego]

Body issues can be a touchy subject for some people. The best thing you can do is coach her and guide her in the right direction. Give her literature on healthy dieting and even lead her to this forum to learn on her own (read, ask questions, etc.) If your girlfriend is as stubborn and strong willed as mine, this will be a task. If she persists to do things the unhealthy way, the help she may need will be help that is beyond your capacity.

best of luck

 

[stxnas]

Eating every 2-3 hours is fine but she needs to have the small meals balanced. Too much protein and it can be stored away thus her gaining weight. She needs a balance of carbs, fats and protein. Only weighing 100lbs she doesn't need much but what she's eating is pretty healthy for her. Fish, nuts, salads.

Sinate's GF is the one who is 100 lbs and Flytrap's GF is 5'3 and 114 and is eating healthy foods...Sinate's is the one not eating...just thought I would clear that up before people started getting confused.

 

[littlemack]

I've been in this same situation a couple of times with gf's.
My gf is 5'7" 109 but was 118 at one point. She was the same way. What helped her was that we would prepare our meals together. It took some experimenting to find foods that she liked that were also healthy, but it helped us both and we both supported each other. I keep protein powder and fruit always on hand if she wants a smoothie or snack. It also helps when you go on a fat loss diet and she begins to wonder why her small two meals a day aren't taking off fat like your 5-6 meals are. She may need some visual proof that your way is better.

 

[jminis]

Sinate's GF is the one who is 100 lbs and Flytrap's GF is 5'3 and 114 and is eating healthy foods...Sinate's is the one not eating...just thought I would clear that up before people started getting confused.

My bad good catch.

 

[stxnas]

My bad good catch.

Umm, yeah...I've had a lot of free time at work lately. Back to the thread though, this is really good. I wish my sister in-law would read this b/c they have the mentality of eat NOTHING and then they'll lose weight. They do a "good" job for about three days and then they junk out and make things even worse...ugh...

 

[CHAPS]

Make sure to top up her daily protein intake...if you get my drift :twisted:

 

[stxnas]

Excellent suggestion!

 

[dmix]

I've had the same issue. I found that no matter how much advice you give her, and how well grounded in science it is, it simply doesn't work until you build up their self-confidence a bit so they're willing to take some suggestion.

Since the science is somewhat contradictory to people who don't understand (not eating doesn't translate to worthwhile weight loss, the evil carbs aren't going straight to your ass, etc) - the only way to get them to understand is to have it be sort of an efficient, long-term goal of "improving health" rather than "i'm losing 10 lbs by next month".

So, tell her she's beautiful, have a lot of sex, try to make it a mutual goal, and when she's receptive, bring in the science and the right way to do things.

My $.01.

 

[jomi822]

she weighs 100 pounds. i dont care how short she is, she shouldnt want to be losing weight.

this is obviously a body image issue. you have already let it progress to the point where she is eating two small meals a day (what are we taling here, 1300 calories at the most?). the next step is diet pills, and after that, not eating at all.

 

[Dolarhyde]

Diet Pills... well that would make her as healthy as, Anna Nicole Smith for instance. heh but with that aside, you guys are all right, diet and exercise are the only real way to go. Sinate, what did she say when you told her this?
If she looks fine now tell her she's gonna look like Calista Flockhart if she loses any more weight.

 

[babolat]

My girlfriend was like that too. Well, right before I first met her kind of.

Losing weight that fast is called irresponsible. There are a lot of health risks, and its not worth it. Its harder to talk to her since shes already good looking and not overweight (I assume), but if she were, I would say to tell her "it didnt take a week to GAIN that weight, and its not going to take a week to lose it. Its a process, but it is worth while."

Maybe I am not helping, but I thought Id try.

 

[Thi]

I must say i agree with the people here. There advice makes a lot of sense. Loosing weight so quick is always harmful and it backfires. I was 104 a few months ago and dropped down to 99 lbs in less than a week due to a horrible break up, but gained it all back and then some after i started gaining my appetite back. Now to take off the extra 5-7 lbs i gained i run everyday and do weight training (not much tho cause i really don't like it, i perfer running). I eat really healthy, small meals etc..no weight loss yet for me, but feel hell of a lot better...i figure patient and consistency is the key, so imma continue on doing it. plus i ask questions on the board..something ur gf should try..really good motivator.

ps:
Keep in mind girls (some i should say) are crazy when in comes to weight/weight loss issues...i should know, just the more you want to loose quickly, the chance of it coming back with a vengence is so much greater...again i know, it happened to me.

 

[hrdgain81]

good luck man, I've been dealing with this kinda crap for the last 4 years. I would love to help, but I havent made any headway on this either.

If you actually get her to listen to you, post up a detailed description of how you accomplished this, so we can all learn from it.

*hint* using logic and facts wont work, it never works, you'll just tire yourself out.

 

[scott72]

she weighs 100 pounds. i dont care how short she is, she shouldnt want to be losing weight.

this is obviously a body image issue. you have already let it progress to the point where she is eating two small meals a day (what are we taling here, 1300 calories at the most?). the next step is diet pills, and after that, not eating at all.

Yeah I was surprised someone didn't mention this before this post. Trying to get down to 90 lbs is crazy. My 11 yr old daughter weighs more than that. Don't support the fact that she needs to shed some pounds. Lack of success from diet pills could lead to a major eating disorder. Be careful here. Take her height and determine what her ideal weight should be. Chances are very good she's already under that.

 

[scott72]

good luck man, I've been dealing with this kinda crap for the last 4 years. I would love to help, but I havent made any headway on this either.

If you actually get her to listen to you, post up a detailed description of how you accomplished this, so we can all learn from it.

*hint* using logic and facts wont work, it never works, you'll just tire yourself out.

Women don't like to be told how to do it from their boyfriends/spouses whatever. They like to learn it on their own or hear it from a friend. Offer her a subscription to women's health or something similar. My wife has that and she's always telling me different things she's learned in there and they're the same things I've been telling her for years, but of course she acts like its the first time she's heard it...

 

[dlew308]

I heard this on the radio before, giving backhanded compliments may work in convincing them to lose weight. I can't recall any compliments at the moment.

 

[MadMas]

she weighs 100 pounds. i dont care how short she is, she shouldnt want to be losing weight.

this is obviously a body image issue. you have already let it progress to the point where she is eating two small meals a day (what are we taling here, 1300 calories at the most?). the next step is diet pills, and after that, not eating at all.

Not always true. I had a 5ft1 ex who was 105 and could have dropped a few. She wouldnt have love handles at 95.

Dont get me wrong she looked good (hence the gf) but there was more to lose safe. If we are willing to push ourselfs to low bfs, we should allow others too.

 

[hrdgain81]

Women don't like to be told how to do it from their boyfriends/spouses whatever. They like to learn it on their own or hear it from a friend. Offer her a subscription to women's health or something similar. My wife has that and she's always telling me different things she's learned in there and they're the same things I've been telling her for years, but of course she acts like its the first time she's heard it...

Of course they dont scott, but personally I dont like hearing women ***** about it, especially when all the answers are right in front of them.

I got the gf a gym membership for her birthday, so she decides she want to do cardio 5 days a week. I know exactly what will happen, she will do that for a week and a half, then she will be burned out, and not want to go anymore. She put on 2lbs the first week and just couldnt understand why that would happen.

So I suppose i'm out 150 bucks, I should have known better.

 

[Dolarhyde]

Of course they dont scott, but personally I dont like hearing women ***** about it, especially when all the answers are right in front of them.

I got the gf a gym membership for her birthday, so she decides she want to do cardio 5 days a week. I know exactly what will happen, she will do that for a week and a half, then she will be burned out, and not want to go anymore. She put on 2lbs the first week and just couldnt understand why that would happen.

So I suppose i'm out 150 bucks, I should have known better.

lol that sucks man. Yeah women really know how to stick it to ya', eh? Did you bother telling her what happened or just said forget it?

 

[hrdgain81]

I didnt bother, she wont take advice on eating, she will skip lunch and eat almost nothing for dinner, and wonder why she is putting on wieght. I've told her many times her body is starving, and she needs to eat small meals more frequently ... she just responds "I dont have time for that, and I'm not a bodybuilder"

I'm past giving a Shvt about it, cause its not gonna change.

 

[scott72]

Of course they dont scott, but personally I dont like hearing women ***** about it, especially when all the answers are right in front of them.

I got the gf a gym membership for her birthday, so she decides she want to do cardio 5 days a week. I know exactly what will happen, she will do that for a week and a half, then she will be burned out, and not want to go anymore. She put on 2lbs the first week and just couldnt understand why that would happen.

So I suppose i'm out 150 bucks, I should have known better.

lol, I hear ya man. Mine keeps starving herself and wonders why she so tired all the time. I try to explain it to her, but then I get the "I don't wanna hear it!" Sooooo, then I just give up and worry about myself, but then I get the "you don't care about me!"....