[INFOHAZARD]

Q: How Many Bush Administration Officials does it take to change a lightbulb?


A: You're a lunatic! There's nothing wrong at all with the light bulb!... First you said there was light, now you flip flop and say the bulb needs changing!... What do you know, you don't know how much light the president had before the invasion!

[DieTrying]

[MarcusG]

Vote bush and get a **** for free.

[jweave23]

actually it takes seven

How many Bush administration officials does it take to change a light bulb?

Are you ready for this?

The Answer is SEVEN:

(1) one to deny that a light bulb needs to be replaced;

(2) one to attack and question the patriotism of anyone who has questions about the light bulb;

(3) one to blame the previous administration for the need of a new light bulb;

(4) one to arrange the invasion of a country rumored to have a secret stockpile of light bulbs;

(5) one to get together with Vice President Cheney and figure out how to pay Halliburton Industries one million dollars for a light bulb;

(6) one to arrange a photo-op session showing Bush changing the light bulb while dressed in a flight suit and wrapped in an American flag;

(7) and finally one to explain to Bush the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.

[jweave23]

another favorite:

Hu's On First

(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That's what I want to know.

Condi: That's what I'm telling you.

George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow's name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The Chinaman!

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya' asking me for?

Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That's the man's name.

George: That's who's name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader
of China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condi: That's correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of
China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don't want Kofi.

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk.
And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the
U.N.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice, here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we
should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

Source: James Sherman

[wojo]

the funny thing really is we have elmer fud and rocky dennis(from the movie mask) running for president

[VanillaGorilla]

You guys honestly think that Kerry doesn't flip flop?

[kwyckemynd00]

I liked the "hu" joke; the other two just sucked.

VG, Kerry doesn't flip-flop. He "thinks in complexities". Remember that

[Jeff]

Yeah the hu joke was good, I can just hear the slow drawl in my head right now.

Did you guys see http://jibjab.com/

check out "This Land" (this one is better) and "Good to be in DC"

[glenihan]

kerry doesn't "flip-flop" he can just admit when he was wrong and made a mistake to me that's the sign of an intelligent mad

[goldylight]

Originally Posted by glenihan

that's the sign of an intelligent mad

he sure is mad

[kwyckemynd00]

Originally Posted by glenihan

kerry doesn't "flip-flop" he can just admit when he was wrong and made a mistake to me that's the sign of an intelligent mad

well, then he admits that he's wrong and makes mistakes too often for my comfort. Honestly, do you want a guy who changes his mind, makes mistakes, (but admits them) to be in charge of our entire country? lol. You got it, bud....