A joke for BPMartyr
- 08-13-2008, 01:50 PM
A joke for BPMartyr
A biker is riding by the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents. The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrifi ed parents, who thank him endlessly.
A New York Times reporter has watched the whole event.
The reporter addressing the biker says, 'Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.' The biker replies, 'Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.' The reporter says, 'Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a journalist from the New York Times, you know, and tomorrow's paper will have this story on the front page... So, what do you do for a living and what political affiliation do you have?'' The biker replies, 'I'm a U.S. Marine and a Republican.' The journalist leaves.
The following morning the biker buys The New York Times to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on front page: * U.S. MARINE ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH *
- 08-13-2008, 02:46 PM
08-13-2008, 02:49 PM
08-14-2008, 03:13 AM
That joke is ignorant.
Love ya Jay.
08-14-2008, 03:22 AM
08-14-2008, 08:21 AM
08-14-2008, 05:56 PM
08-19-2008, 06:59 PM
08-19-2008, 07:03 PM
08-19-2008, 07:10 PM
08-27-2008, 05:52 PM
Q: What do you get when you offer a Liberal a penny for his thoughts?
Q: How do you confuse a Liberal?
A: You don't. They're born that way.
Q: Why is it good to have a Liberal passenger?
A: You can park in the handicap zone.
Q: What's the difference between Elvis and a smart Liberal?
A: Elvis has been sighted.
Q: What do you call a Liberal with an IQ of 130?
A: A foursome
Q: How do you get a one-armed Liberal out of a tree?
A: Wave to him.
Q: What do you call a basement full of Liberals?
A: A whine cellar.
Q: What is the definition of gross ignorance?
A: 144 Liberals.
Q: What is foreplay for a Democrat?
A: Thirty minutes of begging.
Q: What is the Democrat doing when he holds his hands tightly over his ears?
A: Trying to hold on to a thought.
A Democrat found a magic genie's lamp and rubbed it. The genie said, "I will grant you one wish." He said, "I wish I were smarter". So the genie made him a Republican.
Q: What the difference between a Liberal and the rear end of a horse?
A: I don't know either.
Q: Why do so many Liberals live in L.A.?
A: Itís the only city that is easy enough for them to spell.
Q: What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A: A Liberal parade.
Q: What is it called when a Liberal blows in another Liberalís ear?
A: Data transfer.
Q: Why don't they let Liberals swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.
Q: How do you plant dope?
A: Bury a Liberal.
Q: What's the difference between a Liberal and a sack of manure?
A: The sack.
Q: What's the definition of a Democrat running for Congress for the first time?
A: A mouse trying to become a rat.
Q: What's the difference between God and a Democrat?
A: God knows He's not a Democrat.
Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a prostitute?
A: The prostitute gives value for the money she takes.
Q: What's the difference between a Liberal and a catfish?
A: One is an ugly, scum sucking bottom-feeder and the other is a fish.
Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a lawyer?
Q: What do you get when you cross a pilgrim with a democrat?
A: A god-fearing tax collector who gives thanks for what other people have.
Q: Why should Liberals be buried 100 feet deep?
A: Because deep down, they're really good people.
Q: Why did God create Democrats?
A: In order to make used car salesmen look good.
Q: What is a recent Democrat graduate's usual question in his first job?
A: What would you like to have with your french fries, sir?
Q. How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Just one, but it really gets screwed.
Q: How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb?
A: It's irrelevant; they still don't know they're in the dark!
They say that Christopher Columbus was the first Democrat. When he left to discover America, he didn't know where he was going. When he got there he didn't know where he was. And it was all done on a government grant.
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