To whom it may concern:
We appreciate your business but we regret to inform you that we have implemented a new two minute policy. This policy states that from the time you first engage in conversation with myself or associates you have exactly two minutes to tell us all the useless information you feel you need to divulge, which is here stated and not limited to:
What you use to look like.
How much you use to bench press.
How you want to get big but not too big.
How you want to put on size and get leaner at the same time.
How your holding a lot of water right now
How you use to be all muscle and then you got sick or married or some **** that has caused you to look like the fat piece of **** you are now.