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Opinions please...

Rodja

Rodja

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I have been talking to a girl for the past couple of weeks (we have a class together) and we went on a lunch date yesterday. Sadly, it took me almost a week to ask her out to something so simple, but that's beside the point. The actual lunch went really well and I can tell that she is into me and vice versa. However, right at the tail end of it, she casually throws out that she has a BF. It was relevant to the conversation we were having, she didn't just up and mention it. Not once did I get the vibe that she was dating anyone, so this completely caught me off guard.

Then, to add to the confusion, she mentions that she is probably going to break it off (they've only been together for about a month). Seriously, WTF is that about? I have talked to a few of my gal friends and they have all said that she likes me, but to not be too pushy. So, my fellow AM'ers what is your take on this whole situation?
 
I say pursue it but don't be surprised a few months down the road you find out shes getting plowed by some other guy. :run:
 
Shes only been dating him for a month, she could be "dating" like seeing a couple guys, seeing which one she likes. Again, don't be pushy. Just let things happen, and don't get too attached...cuz she seems to keep her options open.

But then again, I'm the guy that made the "Do you think girls..." thread. WTF Do I know??? :)
 
i say play it out man. Just from you said i can see she likes you and thats y she prolly dint bring up her bf til it came in convo. to me that means that she is interested in you and maybe she been planning to leave her bf and you just happen to catch her in the middle of it. also like the top post stated maybe she is a player. SO! i say just get to know her more and kinda get a vibe what kind of girl she is. And hopefully you just caught her in a middle of leaving her bf and you came right in time!
 
mindgame said:
i say play it out man. Just from you said i can see she likes you and thats y she prolly dint bring up her bf til it came in convo. to me that means that she is interested in you and maybe she been planning to leave her bf and you just happen to catch her in the middle of it. also like the top post stated maybe she is a player. SO! i say just get to know her more and kinda get a vibe what kind of girl she is. And hopefully you just caught her in a middle of leaving her bf and you came right in time!
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Somehow, I forgot to mention that she said (and these were her exact words), "I owe you a lunch date now."

I'm definitely going to play this by ear. It'll be interesting to see what happens next week.
 
that means she wants to see you again. plain and simple. she is sending you the signs that she is interested in you. all we have to see if she calls you or wutnot.
 
anytime man. dont forget the average woman will have sex after 3 hrs of talkin,textin,going out. thats when she feels confortable enough. FYI
 
Rodja, this is a very similar situation as to how i met my wife 5years ago. She truly is the best thing that has ever happened to me. We've now been married 2+ years my friend. ;)

If it's worth it to you, then you go for it buddy.
 
Trauma1 said:
Rodja, this is a very similar situation as to how i met my wife 5years ago. She truly is the best thing that has ever happened to me. We've now been married 2+ years my friend. ;)

If it's worth it to you, then you go for it buddy.
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That's what I'm thinking. There was this weird chemistry that is hard to explain as soon as we met. Plus, it doesn't hurt that she is smoking hot.
 
Rodja said:
That's what I'm thinking. There was this weird chemistry that is hard to explain as soon as we met. Plus, it doesn't hurt that she is smoking hot.
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Pics or GTFO.

I don't think any advice can be given other than to play it by ear. Good luck, be a little cautious.
 
Rodja said:
That's what I'm thinking. There was this weird chemistry that is hard to explain as soon as we met. Plus, it doesn't hurt that she is smoking hot.
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Bro the best advice i can give is if it seems right, then go for it. Too many people sit back and let the perfect opportunity pass them by.

I'll tell you this much. I had an amazing chemistry every time i was around my wife even when we first met. I knew deep down that she was the one. In the end, i was right. :)

:chick:
 
If she only mentioned having a bf when it was during an applicable conversation, mentions it in a way to make it seem as casual and of minimal importance as possible, and makes sure to mention she wants to break it off I'd say you're in good shape, ask her out to a few more friendly lunch dates over the next month or so and see what happens. As you girlfriends say, just don't come off overly pushy about it. Good luck man. :)
 
Rodja said:
That's what I'm thinking. There was this weird chemistry that is hard to explain as soon as we met. Plus, it doesn't hurt that she is smoking hot.
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It sounds like she wants to play the field, I bet the guy she's dating wants to take the relationship to the next level and she doesn't wanna go there. My advice to you; don't plan on going there either, DUDE, you're 23! live it up my brutha! Lotsa beatrices out there in that sea:chick::chick::chick::chick::chick::chick:
 
TheCrownedOne said:
Yep. Read my signature. Women will destroy you.
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And for every bad story, there is a good one. I've been on both sides brother. When the time is right, the opportunity will present itself. Whether or not you decide to act upon it, well that is another story.
 
Play it out, have fun. Don't be too pushy in the beginning, but don't be an assuming fool either. Later on at some point you will need to talk to her and figure out where she stands with you and what you want i.e. is she "dating around" or going committed.
 
Rod,
That was a test, bro. She was testing you to see how you would react with something off topic like that.

Just curious if you remember how you reacted to the situation when she said that.
Emotions? Body language?
(Not so much words - women seem to respond/observe non-verbal ques.)
 
jmh80 said:
Rod,
That was a test, bro. She was testing you to see how you would react with something off topic like that.

Just curious if you remember how you reacted to the situation when she said that.
Emotions? Body language?
(Not so much words - women seem to respond/observe non-verbal ques.)
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The tone in my voice didn't change too much, but I can't recall what my body language was. We were in a car, so there wasn't too much movement for me to make.
 
I caught a girl when she had been dating a guy 2 months but she wasnt really into him.

Shes my wife now. :D

Pursue. Pursue. Play it cool though...
 
Rodja said:
The tone in my voice didn't change too much, but I can't recall what my body language was. We were in a car, so there wasn't too much movement for me to make.
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The thing I've seen that works best in a test like that is just keep going about doing what you were doing - unaffected.

A major swing in emotion towards a comment like that can seem to drive attraction away.

Anyway - good luck bro.
 
Same scenario with me, the girl is fine. She's a model for vogue and glamour. Can get rough around the edges but sex is great.
 
jmh80 said:
Pics or that's not real.
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Possibility is you won't even find her attractive; I see women at my girlfriend's modeling agency - Sutherland Models - that is the 'official agency of Canada's Next Top Model' that are gnarly. High-fashion is very strange and seasonal.
 
Mulletsoldier said:
Possibility is you won't even find her attractive; I see women at my girlfriend's modeling agency - Sutherland Models - that is the 'official agency of Canada's Next Top Model' that are gnarly. High-fashion is very strange and seasonal.
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Yeah - that's true. I've seen girls in mags and on TV that were models but normal looking.
 
jmh80 said:
The thing I've seen that works best in a test like that is just keep going about doing what you were doing - unaffected.

A major swing in emotion towards a comment like that can seem to drive attraction away.

Anyway - good luck bro.
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I stayed pretty even keel after she said it and I am not going to let it stop me. She could have said no to the whole thing, but she didn't, so there is something there, especially since she said that she owes me a lunch date now.
 
I'd be prepared for more tests, Rod. She views you as appealing - girls will push buttons to see if you become a choad.
 
jmh80 said:
I'd be prepared for more tests, Rod. She views you as appealing - girls will push buttons to see if you become a choad.
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Life is a test, so that is nothing new to me. I can tell a huge change in my demeanor from a few years back and for the better. I used to be a huge *******, but I am much more chill these days. I credit MMA for leveling me out as ironic as that sounds. What sucks is that I won't see her until Monday (she went home for the weekend), but I guess it is a good time to reflect on the events.
 
After some time to think about it, I know that I will continue to move forward with ths situation I want to thank everyone for their thoughts on this situation.
 
Alexander said:
Pics or GTFO.

I don't think any advice can be given other than to play it by ear. Good luck, be a little cautious.
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Here are a few. She kinda looks like Denise Richards in these.
 

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She is very pretty, wishing you all the luck with this situation, been working 6 days on, just seeing whats up before i crash!!!!!!

TC
 
Rodja said:
Here are a few. She kinda looks like Denise Richards in these.
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Nice, looks like a little sex kitten. I mean that in a good way, not like she looks like a whore or something. Pics can be really deceiving, she looks like the type that looks even better in person. Nice catch though, if she's cool you had better put forth some effort. Good luck mate, and don't beat anyone up in front of her, unless they grab her a$$ or something:fool2:
 
Alexander said:
Nice, looks like a little sex kitten. I mean that in a good way, not like she looks like a whore or something. Pics can be really deceiving, she looks like the type that looks even better in person. Nice catch though, if she's cool you had better put forth some effort. Good luck mate, and don't beat anyone up in front of her, unless they grab her a$$ or something:fool2:
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Yeah, that's a good idea. IDK how she found out that I train either, maybe she overhead me talking to someone about it because I made a point to keep it on the DL. I tend to get a little stereotyped because of it. The best part of the whole thing is that I don't think she knows just how hot she is.

FYI, I usually deem someone like her to be way out of my league as far as looks are concerned, so this is very new territory for me.
 
Rodja said:
Yeah, that's a good idea. IDK how she found out that I train either, maybe she overhead me talking to someone about it because I made a point to keep it on the DL. I tend to get a little stereotyped because of it. The best part of the whole thing is that I don't think she knows just how hot she is.

FYI, I usually deem someone like her to be way out of my league as far as looks are concerned, so this is very new territory for me.
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Yeah, I can easily see you getting stereotyped for being a fighter. People assume you must be somewhat crazy, clearly they're ignorant. I mean you probably are crazy, but that has nothing to do with playing a sport.

I don't think she's out of your league at all dude. She might be thinking the same thing about you. Damn I'm gay.
 
Alexander said:
Yeah, I can easily see you getting stereotyped for being a fighter. People assume you must be somewhat crazy, clearly they're ignorant. I mean you probably are crazy, but that has nothing to do with playing a sport.

I don't think she's out of your league at all dude. She might be thinking the same thing about you. Damn I'm gay.
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:toofunny::toofunny:

I wish I had the ego to think that way. I was such a dork when I was a teenager that I never really developed a solid sense of self when it comes to meeting/picking up girls. I try to reinforce the notion that I am a good catch, but my efforts have been fruitless lately.
 
Little update for you guys/gals:
She broke up with her BF and we went on another lunch date today. We have tentative plans to hang out on Saturday night (which I hope happen). All-in-all, everything is looking fantabulous.
 
what did i tell you. she was going to break up with him the whole time but just waiting for the right time. I bet shes one of those females who hates to be single or alone for a long period of time. GL on saturday though.
 
If you're too passive I would bet Alexander's life you are going to be relegated solely to a friend. The worst thing to assume is that because 'you're there for her', you're automatically qualified for her next mate. She could have wanted to skid this guy for ages, and has now engaged you as a plutonic confidant - ensure the message that you are the prize is related.
 
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