The Word newbie these days seems to come with a hex attached to it. Before a newbie could be defined as:
Newbie- Adj. One who has taken interest in an area that they are unfamiliar with.
Now a newbie, with the stigma of ignorance attached, is looked down upon for repetitive questions and requests of information that has been covered several times previously. So how should you handle these people? Heres how:
1. First, do us all a favor and remember that not every newbie is a teenager. Not to say that the majority of newbies are not teens, but you have to be open minded and remember older members can be newbies also. As my parents taught me before their departure, respect your elders. If a newbie steps in and wants to know the difference of protein powders, before you tell "Damn, someone should have told your parents to not have sex drunk", pick apart the language used. You can usually tell a teen from an older individual by the use of language. Heres an example translation of teen language from those who respect the english language:
"kewl" = cool "lyke" = like "phat" = very cool
"boi" = boy "wot" = what "Shud" = should
*After you decifer the bull****, you can then decide the age of the person. If you conclude the person is obviously older and can successfully combine words to form a reasonable sentence, show some respect and answer their question or lead them in the right direction.
2. If you're tired of answering the same questions over and over again,DON'T. Simple. Instead of saying "Listen you piece of ****, use the search function or we'll burn your house down" Just ignore and avoid the question. Just because you are a "vet" doesnt mean you have to answer every question. Let someone else do it.
3. Educate yourself. Instead of screaming "God Damn! If your dad would have pulled out just a bit quicker I wouldnt have to deal with your newbie ****!!" Try teaching a newbie. I dont know if anyone's ever heard "the best way to learn something is to teach it" and anyone who has even been in college/grad school knows this is EXACTLY right. Teach them. What does this accomplish? Well not only will you gain respect for your patience and willingness to help a newbie, you're also reteaching yourself and helping store this knowledge in your long term memory. Go out of your way, teach them what they want to know, and then some. You might answer more questions they might have and save yourself from having to do it in another thread later on.
4. Not everyone was born knowing everything and you can bet your sweet ass you didnt know much when you got started in this sport. Remember that. They have to learn somehow and to be honest, sometimes using the search function and reading hundreds of articles arent the best way. My old professors always said "direct attention and direct responses to questions are the best way to learn". Let's face it, everyone wants THEIR question answer, no matter how many times its been asked. So before making yourself look like an ass and posting a cute picture you have saved on your computer for them to read, help'em out or ignore them, your wise ass didnt know it all from birth.
5. Take someone under your wing. It's called "giving back". what goes around comes around. Yep, whether you like it or not, its the truth. Take a newbie or two under your wing, get them in a chat room or PM them and help them along, let them talk your ear off and answer their questions. I do it everyday and I dont mind at all. Create good karma for yourself (and I dont mean here at BDC's dumbass) I mean in life. You do something for someone, eventually you may need something from them and dont give me the "This guy's a tool belt, what could I possibly need from him?" Well this tool belt might know everything there is to know about making...say pipe bombs (you get the picture), well you might want to make one someday, you punk this guy, do not expect him to help you.
6. Do not lie to newbies. If they ask a question and you dont know the answer, dont make it up or bull**** it, this is come back and bite you in the ass. Not to mention risk your "vet" status. You lie to them once, everyone will know, thats how it works. The best thing to do is if you dont know the answer, dont reply to the thread, or if they ask you directly, refer them to someone who knows the answer (not me please). Avoid being a smart ass also. Newbies are new. They respect you. Anything you tell them, they'll follow, thats whats great about being a vert and/or mod. You're in a position to be a leader and be respected. Dont blow it by being a smartass or dick head. So if someone says "Whats a good dinner if Im bulking?" Dont say "Have some choc. milk and a ham and cheese hot pocket" Seriously, it sounds dumb to us but they just might believe you.
7. Tough love. I find that tough love works well not "**** off you morbid crack baby" Give them the answer and explain to them how they could have found it for themselves. Now most teenage newbies will come back with "I just wanted my question answered *******, dont tell me how to search" Then by all means, flame away.
8. Careful who you call a newbie. Some people are highly involved & educated in nutrition/training and dont know much at all about PHs, AAS etc. Dont kid yourself, you dont know everything and will never know everything, swallow your pride and ask for help. No one will think less of you, if anything it will just add to your arsonal of knowledge. You'll find me asking various PH questions from time to time, I wont lie, I consider myself a pro hormone newbie.
9. Educational flaming. I touched on this above. No one has yet to define a "flame". So I will.....lets say a flame is like a new truck. An educatonal flame is like a Caddy and a "Im bored so I'll pick on someone" flame is like a Nissan. There are a variety of styles, some cruel but funny, some obviously well thought out and some ignorant and make you look more ignorant than the newbie. Example of an educational flame:
"Yo YJ, I need sum info on how to get leen muscle mass on glutimen, how many scoops do I take?"
Well... Glutamine really isnt as important as a solid diet and proper traning. I hope you do not think only glutamine will give you the results you need, if so you'd better take up tennis or soccer. Now glutamine is the most abundant free form amino acid. I dont find it very resourceful, but if you have it take it at 20 grams a day, 10 upon awakening and 5 before training and 5 after. Best of Luck.
Now A Bad flame:
Look mother ****er.... Ive seen you post around here and everyone of your questions make you look like you are a 5th grade drop out, use the search function and this is why relatives shouldnt reproduce.
10. The final request in handling newbies. Do not correct their spelling, sentence structure, choice of words, or vocabulary. They're here to have a nutrition/training/supplement/AAS question answered, not a lesson in english. Save yourself the time, answer the question and submit it. No one is impressed with your spell checking ability or grammatical skills. Im one of the worst spellers out there....(re-read this post ) When I ask a question, I want the answer, not a lesson in basic english. And remember, not everyone has english as a native tongue. Im guilty of this, but I wont do it anymore, do not stoop to the level of correcting vocabulary.
I was obviously bored sitting here at work, so take this for what its worth, I dont think it's half bad now that I re-read it. Give newbies a chance, it will only benefit you. If the infamous Yellow "newbie killa" Jacket can do it, I know all you guys can.
Ps. "killa" is teen or "ganster" slang for killer.