Need help...

LCSULLA

Well-known member
Ok heres the deal. I got this friend who is extremely overweight. He goes about 5'6 235-245lbs and none of it is muscle. He hasn't really been active since gym class in HS (which if I recall he skipped a lot of). He's my age 35 and been out of HS 18yrs this summer.
Now heres my problem: How do I convince him that he needs to change and loss the weight? His eating habits are HORRIBLE!
Last nite I met him and another friend at the comicstore where he works part-time and he is scarfing down a huge berretto with everything on it along with a bag of chips and salsa at 10:30pm.
Now the gym is out because I know he would never go and he would never put out the effort to achive anything. He would see no results and quit.
I wanted him to join me in BJJ or even thai boxing (no sparring). Hell I even told him I would pay a year membership for him. Unlike the gym, the classes are at certian times and I go to them so he couldn't say "Oh I was there". He also needs someone to push him and give him a more can-do attitude.
But I have tried every aurgument in the book. Example: he always falls for the 24-25yr hotties. You know the type 5'8 insane body, real eye candy. But he can never land the deal. He's not ugly and he can talk. And these women do think he is cool and everything, but they think about how fat he is and the deal is off. He hasn't been with a girl since 2000 or so.
And he doesn't want to date girls more in his league, so I would tell him that he can't have his cake and eat it too. You either have to be fairly fit to get the girls you like or you need to look for something more in your league. But he doesn't listen.

What I would like to hear from you guys is how would you convince him. I esp. want to hear guys and gals that may have been fat and lost a lot of weight. Tell me how someone would have convinced you to change your ways. I'll even take stories of people you know that have changed and what convinced them.
 
Well, in my experience it's like dealing with people who smoke or drink too much. You can do 90% of the work for them but until they are ready to change you'll do nothing but frustrate yourself. If what you've attempted to do hasn't worked and he's a friend you care about you can always try the candid approach. Some people can be shocked into changing.

Tell him you're worried about his health and the last thing you want to do is see him dead in 10 years because he ate himself into a casket. Find out the things he likes to do and use those tied into being at least somewhat healthy as a reason to lose some weight. Tell him you'll help him buy groceries and plan out the meals and all he has to do is read the chart and cook the meal and that all he needs to do is just show up and start out light and go from there. Give him a chance to find out something he likes in the gym/fitness atmosphere. Maybe he'll turn into a bjj freak or maybe find he's good at endurance running etc.

I knew a guy who fit his profile and went running with two women(long distance runners) one day after they talked him into it. 5 years later he runs marathons and a few months ago went to alaska to run one there.
 
take him to an old folks home and show him some overweight people with type 2 diabetes that have had to have a foot amputated...tell him this is where he is headed if he doesnt change his lifestyle
 
Remind him that he will never have sex if he is fat.

Two years ago I realized this. Now I'm 70 pounds lighter. And I intend to keep going, because every pound lost means another step up on the ladder of dating. Until I can walk into a bar, ***** slap some older executive out of the way who thinks he's the **** because he's got defined abs, and say to the chick he was hitting on, "Sup, you're hot, I'm young and wild, let's get this wagon train rolling."


Mega NRG Power!
 
I would make a deal with him, go like "I will give you $100 if you lose 5lbs in 1 month". Pester him be persistent.

When I realised how easy it is to lose weight it motivated me a lot, and the more overweight you are the easier it is to lose it.

If that doesnt work, you might haveto have a serious convosation with him and dont sugarcoat things, tell him how he is wasting opotunities to better himself, I bet if he lost weight he could root those hotties. The important thing is dont hold back if you think he is getting emotionally cut.

You could also try asking your hottest chick friend to try convince him, one way or another. Theres a big diffrence to being told something and seeing it happen, the chick needs to be able to do something like that but. Telling him "if u lost weight you could root her" doesnt cut it the same as a chick telling him to his face "if you were thinner I would **** your brains out".
 
It's worth mentioning that in Sci-fi/Apocalyptic/Pulp Fiction stories, the weak and the sick always get killed or die, whereas the strong, tough guys survive. Therefore, we're more likely to survive if **** goes down.
 
Tell him to listen to tom leykus ;)
You can be fat and get hot chics if they think you have $$$
bahahaha, i love that show
 
LCSULLA said:
But I have tried every aurgument in the book. Example: he always falls for the 24-25yr hotties. You know the type 5'8 insane body, real eye candy. But he can never land the deal. He's not ugly and he can talk. And these women do think he is cool and everything, but they think about how fat he is and the deal is off. He hasn't been with a girl since 2000 or so.
And he doesn't want to date girls more in his league, so I would tell him that he can't have his cake and eat it too. You either have to be fairly fit to get the girls you like or you need to look for something more in your league. But he doesn't listen.
Click to expand...

That's a big part of the problem right there. Hell, I don't mind doing average chicks, it beats doing your hand. Tell him to practice on the average ones for the good ones to come down the road when he gets in shape. Tell him that every day he keeps doing what he's doing will be another day he keeps looking how he's looking :)
 
Thanks everyone for your responses. Hopefully he will see the light. About 6-7 friends are going to sit him down and talk to him about it.
Ok my friends will do most of the talking; I'll be nodding my head. Seems I am too abrasive. :)
 
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