They walk among us

  1. Senior Member
    Skye's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Posts
    1,944
    Rep Power
    1113
    Level
    32
    Lv. Percent
    79.77%
    Achievements Activity ProPosting Pro

    They walk among us


    not sure were this came from, if its been posted or what, but it was worth reading





    Number One Idiot of 2006

    I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in
    toxicology at the
    poison control center. Today, this woman called in
    very upset because she
    caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly
    reassured her that the
    ants are not harmful and there would be no need to
    bring her daughter into
    the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the
    conversation happened
    to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison
    to eat in order to
    kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her
    daughter into the
    emergency room right away. Here's your sign, lady.
    Wear it with pride.


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Number Two Idiot of 2006

    Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield
    decided to steal a
    life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful
    in getting it out of
    the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a
    float on the river,
    they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards
    them. It turned out
    that the chopper was homing in on the emergency
    locator beacon that
    activated when the raft was inflated. They are no
    longer employed at Boeing.
    Here's your sign, guys. Don't get it wet; the paint
    might run.




    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Number Three Idiot of 2006

    A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America,
    walked into the Branch and
    wrote "this. Put all your muny in this bag." While
    standing in line, waiting
    to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that
    someone had seen him
    write the note and might call the police before he
    reached the teller's
    window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the
    street to the Wells
    Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he
    handed his note to the
    Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from
    his spelling errors that
    he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him
    that she could not
    accept his stickup note because it was written on a
    Bank of America deposit
    slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells
    Fargo deposit slip or
    go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated,
    the man said, "OK"
    and left.He was arrested a few minutes later, as he
    was waiting in line back
    at Bank of America. Don't bother with this guy's sign.
    He probably couldn't
    read it anyway.


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Number Four Idiot of 2006

    A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated
    speed trap that; measured
    his speed using radar and photographed his car. He
    later received in the
    mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead
    of payment, he sent
    the police department a photograph of $40. Several
    days later, he received a
    letter from the police that contained another
    picture, this time of
    handcuffs. He immediately mailed in his $40. Wise
    guy........ but you still
    get a sign!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Number Five Idiot of 2006

    A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun
    and demanded all of
    the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put
    the cash in a bag, the
    robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind
    the counter on the
    shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as
    well, but the cashier
    refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are
    over 21." The robber said
    he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him
    because she didn't
    believe him. At this point, the robber took his
    driver's license out of his
    wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it
    over and agreed that
    the man was in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in
    the bag. The robber
    then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier
    promptly called the
    police and gave the name and address of the robber
    that he got off the
    license. They arrested the robber two hours later.
    This guy definitely needs
    a sign.


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Idiot Number Six of 2006

    A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop
    nervously waving revolvers.
    The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner
    moved, the startled
    first bandit shot him. This guy doesn't even deserve a
    sign.




    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Idiot Number Seven of 2006

    Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty
    badly. He decided that he'd
    just throw a cinder block through a liquor store
    window, grab some booze,
    and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it
    over his head at the
    window. The cinder block bounced back knocking him
    unconscious. It seems the
    liquor store window was made of Plexi-Glass. The whole
    event was caught on
    videotape. Yep, Here's your sign. (Please note that
    all of the above people
    are allowed to vote.)

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





    IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:

    I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new
    neighbor call the local
    township administrative office to request the removal
    of the Deer Crossing
    sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being
    hit by cars out here!
    I don't think this is a good place for them to be
    crossing anymore." From
    Kingman , KS


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



    IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local
    Taco Bell and ordered a
    taco. She asked the person behind the counter for
    "minimal lettuce." He said
    he was sorry, but they only had iceberg. He was a
    Chef? Yep...From Kansas
    City !

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



    IDIOT SIGHTING: I was at the airport, checking in at
    the gate when an
    airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in
    your baggage without
    your knowledge? To which I replied, "If it was without
    my knowledge, how
    would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's
    why we ask."
    Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



    IDIOT SIGHTING: The stoplight on the corner buzzes
    when its safe to cross
    the street. I was crossing with an intellectually
    challenged coworker of
    mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I
    explained that it
    signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled,
    she responded, "What
    on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a
    probation officer in
    Wichita , KS.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



    IDIOT SIGHTING: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and
    dear coworker. She was
    leaving the company due to" downsizing." Our manager
    commented cheerfully,
    "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not
    another word was spoken.
    We all just looked at each other with that
    deer-in-the-headlights stare.
    This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



    IDIOT SIGHTING: I work with an individual who plugged
    her power strip back
    into itself and for the sake of her own life, couldn't
    understand why her
    system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas
    County Sheriffs office no
    less.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



    IDIOT SIGHTING: When my husband and I arrived at an
    automobile dealership to
    pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked
    in it. We went to the
    service department and found a mechanic working
    feverishly to unlock the
    drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger
    side, I instinctively
    tried the door handle and discovered that it was
    unlocked. "Hey," I
    announced to the technician, "its open!" His reply, "I
    know - I already got
    that side." This was at the CHEVY dealership in Canton
    , Mississippi !





    STAY ALERT! !!

  2. Registered User
    somewhatgifted's Avatar
    Stats
    6'2"  210 lbs.
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    4,390
    Rep Power
    2336
    Level
    45
    Lv. Percent
    13.62%
    Achievements Activity ProPosting Pro

    Lmao heard a few of those before, prolly my long days of surfing... AHEM working.
  3. Board Sponsor
    mmowry's Avatar
    Stats
    5'9"  260 lbs.
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Age
    43
    Posts
    2,213
    Rep Power
    1601
    Level
    34
    Lv. Percent
    21.59%
    Achievements Activity ProPosting Pro

    Common sense is not necessarily common.


    Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths . Proverbs 3:5-6
    •   
       

  4. Board Supporter
    Bering C's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Age
    48
    Posts
    372
    Rep Power
    314
    Level
    16
    Lv. Percent
    15.65%

    This past summer at the Valdez oil terminal some workers saw a few people in a small inflatable motoring around just offshore, they asked their supervisor who they were and what they were doing, the sup said "I don't know throw some rocks at them",, Which they did and hit two of the occupants of the raft, one of which happened to be the visiiting Commandant of the US Coast Guard! Needless to say there was three postions opened at Veco that day.
  5. New Member
    baxter32's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    23
    Rep Power
    114
    Level
    4
    Lv. Percent
    32.95%

    Yeah, probably not a real wise decision to throw rocks at the coast guard.
  6. Registered User
    somewhatgifted's Avatar
    Stats
    6'2"  210 lbs.
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    4,390
    Rep Power
    2336
    Level
    45
    Lv. Percent
    13.62%
    Achievements Activity ProPosting Pro

    Quote Originally Posted by Bering C
    This past summer at the Valdez oil terminal some workers saw a few people in a small inflatable motoring around just offshore, they asked their supervisor who they were and what they were doing, the sup said "I don't know throw some rocks at them",, Which they did and hit two of the occupants of the raft, one of which happened to be the visiiting Commandant of the US Coast Guard! Needless to say there was three postions opened at Veco that day.

    I bet throwing rocks was too easy, they needed to break out the golf clubs.
  

  
 

Similar Forum Threads

  1. Replies: 68
    Last Post: 12-06-2012, 04:42 PM
  2. What is the distance they usually walk in the farmers walk?
    By CoorsLight126 in forum Powerlifting/Strongman
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 02-21-2011, 10:55 PM
  3. they walk among us, and some have really good ideas
    By lennoxchi in forum General Chat
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 08-02-2009, 01:48 AM
  4. Honestly, do they want us to smoke more?
    By spatch in forum General Chat
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 08-31-2007, 01:15 AM
  5. they gottem
    By destro19 in forum General Chat
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 10-24-2002, 04:11 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Log in
Log in