- 07-07-2006, 08:54 AM
Anybody else have anger problems?
It's really starting to ruin my life!
I'll only fly off the handle once every few months, but the repercussions last a long time.
I'm also constantly irritated, so says my girlfriend. It's putting alot of strain on our relationship.
Last night I lost it again, i ended up yelling at my whole family, breaking furniture, etc.
Its very embarassing and I'm ashamed of it. Its caused by alot of stuff, my upbringing, insecurities, etc.
Time for counseling....I'm hoping it will help. I try really hard to stay cool alot, but sometimes its like I'm someone else, and I can't stop what I do.
- 07-07-2006, 09:06 AM
i did/do to some degree. when i was younger it was worse, now i have great control over it. Just remember to breathe deep and think before you act out.
- 07-07-2006, 09:13 AM
I have embarresed myself enough in my life with my inability to control myself. I had to ask myself "Is this who I am?" So working on myself with training is a huge component of my inner-peace. I am a free man from the law for the first time in my life. If you make yourself lose enough, you may also make yourself change. I am reading a great "Self-Care" book right now called "Riding the Dragon." It is helping.
Good luck.My The 1 LOG: http://anabolicminds.com/forum/steroids/254164-my-one-log.html
07-07-2006, 09:15 AM
I just saw the furniture thing, I once broke up with a girl and was HAMMERED and turned every piece of furniture over in the house. Everything except the couch which they found me half dressed and passed out on.
Seeing a Therapist beats seeing a lawyer. (Sorry YR)
My The 1 LOG: http://anabolicminds.com/forum/steroids/254164-my-one-log.html
07-07-2006, 09:30 AM
Thanks for the posts guys. Man I've quit smoking, and a slew of other bad habits but this one definately takes the cake. Angers run in my family for generations...I'm going to see a therapist, but my dad says "learn to control yourself" ... Anger can be a damn powerful emotion for me, so much that I end up in tears when I realize what I've done, who I've hurt, etc.
I have just shrugged it off in the past but now I'm at the point where I have to admit I have a problem in order to address and fix it.
I'm pretty sure the red hot rage I feel, if not controlled, will cause me to lose those who are close to me, if not more.
Again thanks for the support^^^
07-07-2006, 10:20 AM
My situation exactly.Originally Posted by tattoopierced1
I was recently reading about an anger disorder that is fairly common (something like 5-10% of people have it). I don't recall what treatment is like, but this is something to look into. As Motiv8er said, better to see a therapist than a lawyer. I'm not sure if this is it, but this should get you started
Psychological Impulse Control DisordersMany psychological problems are characterized by a loss of control or a lack of control in specific situations. Usually, this lack of control is part of a pattern of behavior that also involves other maladaptive thoughts and actions, such as substance abuse problems or sexual disorders like the paraphilias (e.g. pedophilia and exhibitionism). When loss of control is only a component of a disorder, it usually does not have to be a part of the behavior pattern, and other symptoms must also be present for the diagnosis to be made.
But, there are several psychological disorders that are defined primarily by loss of control. These impulse control problems will be described here briefly:
Intermittent Explosive Disorder
[Focus on this...]
Intermittent Explosive Disorder - Episodes of aggressive outbursts resulting in either destruction of property or physical assaults on others. Typically, this problem results in legal problems as well, because the individual is often charged with assault, or a domestic violence charge.
Loss of control is an essential feature of this disorder. The individual, usually male, has had several incidents of losing control of anger, resulting in aggressive acting out, either by assaulting others, or destroying property. The degree of aggression is always out of proportion to any precipitating factors that might be present (within an argument, for example). Typically, these individuals will not take responsibility for their loss of control, instead blaming the victim, other circumstances in their life, or some third party who may have told them something or said something that "caused" their uncontrolled anger. Lack of control is a central part of the problem, and inability to accept responsibility for the aggression helps to alleviate guilt. It also prevents the individual from making any changes.
Dr. Franklin uses both behavioral and cognitive interventions of this type of control problem. In particular, anger management techniques are needed, as well as discovering a way to deflect the anger so that it can be controlled.
Don't worry about the other disorders it is characterized with. They all involve lack of impulse control, but the similarity doesn't mean you'll start lighting fires or stealing...unless there is something else you want to tell us
07-07-2006, 11:29 AM
you can also try some natural sullotions
Riodola Rosia*not sure if i spelt that correctly*
Phenibut Powder(i know anxitey, but it seems to mellow me out a bit as well)
My personal favorite, Oxymist higher dosages anger is not a problem.
There are a couple others that people can chime in on, give those a try. I have a friend with a similar anger problem, I gave him oxymist to see how it would effect him. I didnt tell him anything outside its a bodybuilding supplment like NO2 (Gave him a false mindset to make sure wasnt a palcebo)
Anyways he's been super mellow ever since taking it and has tha nked me, for hooking him up. It even helped him quit smoking which has plagued his life for the last 6 month's. Although at times when he mega doses it, he can be a bit much(talk talk talk) He's alot better in this state, then in the STATE PEN.
Give these options a try, conciling works well as well, but becareful as they can screw you up more then help some of the time.
07-07-2006, 01:17 PM
Wow, I think I have that disorder. I recall when i was younger, my parents tried to send me to bed, and i flipped out and attacked them with a butchers knife. Long story short i was arrested, charged, got off with disorderly conduct, but only because I had to go see a counselor for six months. Terribly boring, in fact my suggestion is if a counselor doesnt work, get some Xanax, it usually makes you pretty mellow.
07-07-2006, 10:20 PM
Watch the labels man! Doc`s and drugs(not good ones) go hand in hand...
What kind of situations do you get pissed off about most? There are patterns you just need to find them.
Look for the signs... where do you feel anger first? And last before you lash out?
Do you bring things up from the past when angry? How far back? If way back... get out paper and pen when pissed and just keeping writing down what ever comes out. ALL of it! Resentment is a MF`er
These are the things you will hear in therapy... AVOID THE DRUGS to many sides... been there, labeled Rage Disordered long ago and moved on. Also avoid the guilt by doing the work to get better.
07-07-2006, 10:23 PM
Talk to a doc and a therapist. It very well could be chemical imbalances and sometimes drugs are better than the alternative of losing control one day andhurting someone you love.
Cymbalta has been getting good results for depression which can lead to those outbursts.
07-07-2006, 10:50 PM
Ya i've got some anger issues as well, i've gone off the handle on quite a few ppl but it's strange like it'll come in bouts like i'll be fine then for some reason i'll be an ******* for like a week, so when it hits me now i just keep myself busy and put that energy into something contructive. Because that's all it is, is negative energy. I'll punch a punching bag, lift weights, go for a run, walk my dogs, if i'm mad at someone i'll write a note to them and it'll get REAL nasty then u just tear it up, it's like a way of downloading all the anger if you will, you'll end up feeling really relaxed after that. But ya councelling sounds good, you just need to come up with strategies to deal with your anger issue. But 90% of the time i'm a real easy going nice guy. It's strange i'm sure i have some sort of weird anger disorder. Testosterone makes me happy and Tren doesn't make me a prick or anything just more aggressive in the gym, so i CAN control myself. But i still have the odd time i feel like i'm going to go break someone's arm or something.
07-07-2006, 10:58 PM
Does anyone ever get angry thinking about past experiences that pissed you off, like ex girlfriends, jobs etc? I get that alot, and ya i had an out of control temper when i was younger, i choked out my sister when she made my mom cry, punched and kicked holes in the walls, glad i got a handle on it now. It's really draining and keep this in mind anger and sadness are linked, so if you've got anger issues chances are you got issues with depression.
07-07-2006, 11:58 PM
I have to go to court mandated anger management classes.
This is the result of a slight altercation I had with my former neighbors (some drunk f*cks)
They charge $50 a class for eight weeks = 8 classes
They can charge what they want… because they know you *have* to go.
Last edited by James; 07-08-2006 at 12:25 AM.
07-08-2006, 02:45 AM
Rhodiola rosea will definitely help. Remember to take it at least 2-3 times per day for best results. I was seriously raging out a week ago due to frustration and fatigue. The most I will allow myself to do is throw things around a little and I would never hurt my loved ones, but it IS difficult to keep a cool face and not scare everyone. My wife could see me stewing and bristling and just grabbed me and held me for a while. It made me realize I better chill out. I took a 300 mg dose of Rhodi and everything's been much MUCH mellower since.
Other supplements to be seriously considered. If taken regularly, these will help with depression, anxiety and anger issues.
B12--sublingual or injectible
B6- 100 mg per day
magnesium asporotate-- lots everyday with some zinc
folic acid at 2-5 mgs per day
L-theanine is good for mellowing mood as well.
07-08-2006, 09:41 AM
I used to have alot of anger , not directed at one person but several, wrong doings,death...etc...I mean we all do right? I work out everyday alone, walk, ride a bike, alone....It has helped me, it's my time. If i want to swear, whatever, no one suffers or sees it but me.....
Just my 2 cents...good luck
RIP Ryan, :(
07-08-2006, 11:51 AM
i've had that problem in younger days. Therapy. I found out what I thought I was mad about really what wasn't making me mad. It can help you discover why you are mad and why you act that way. I didn't need any "drugs" to get under control either just needed to understand the root of my anger. Hope that helps.
07-08-2006, 12:22 PM
Whenever I feel like I'm about to boil over, I tell myself that I am not an animal. Therefore I have control over my emotions and I will not let them control me.
07-09-2006, 02:05 PM
Definitley second the Rhodiola. Its amazing how sublte, but well it works to control stress.Rhodiola rosea will definitely help. Remember to take it at least 2-3 times per day for best results. I was seriously raging out a week ago due to frustration and fatigue. The most I will allow myself to do is throw things around a little and I would never hurt my loved ones, but it IS difficult to keep a cool face and not scare everyone. My wife could see me stewing and bristling and just grabbed me and held me for a while. It made me realize I better chill out. I took a 300 mg dose of Rhodi and everything's been much MUCH mellower since.
I used to have anger issues, I'd blow up, scream and yell and break stuff, etc. I got through it on my own by following the advice EEMain mentioned above...take a deep breath, think about what you're doing. Sometimes its almost like you have to 'redirect' that energy into something else. Drop and do some pushups, sprint down the street, etc. Eventually your initial reaction to a situation that angers you will change. Some people might really need drugs, but I'd say do your best to avoid them...in most cases its teaching yourself how to replace an ingrained behavior (the flip out response) with a new one. Kind of like rewiring your brain in a way
07-09-2006, 02:54 PM
unfortunately I need to spread reps before giving to BV, and EEmain again.. But they give good advice.
I rewired myself much like BV said. In the past 6 years, I've had only a few flip outs. Mostly because I was disrespected, and taught the people that it cannot go unpunished.... I justified it by telling myself that. lol... unfortunately I was as wrong as they were... I'm still learning compassion and teaching myself not to be so quick to judge... but in my enviroment it is VERY hard not to do so.
Breathing is such a huge part of this.. People have noticed that Babies breathe with mostly their diaphram... their tummies heave moreso than their chests... Diaphramatic breathing is taught in many meditation-orientated disciplines... Babies had it right the whole time... much like their fascination with boobies.
**sidenote*** Trenbolone use renders me much more liable to eat people if I don't remember to breathe.
07-09-2006, 03:06 PM
Anger is an e-motion... just that energy in motion.
Learn to deal with it not eat it... or it will and does eat at you. Wisdom or bull****... you decide?
07-09-2006, 03:29 PM
Here's a little story that was told to me once.
A Grandfather and Grandson are sitting together after the Grandson had an episode of anger.
The Grandfather says to the Grandson,
"There are two Wolves inside everyone. One Wolf is filled with Anger, Frustration, Self-doubt, and Misery. The other Wolf is filled with Love, Compassion, Understanding, and Kindness. These Wolves are constantly battling inside all of us. Which one would win the battle?"
The Grandson replies,
"I would think the stronger one?" To which the Grandfather says,
"Dear Grandson, it is the one you feed, that will eventually win the battle."
07-09-2006, 03:51 PM
07-09-2006, 04:55 PM
Great story, Ubi.
Antidepressants are the worst ****ing thing you could do to yourself. Try to meditate, yoga would help too.
07-09-2006, 06:09 PM
Great info from everyone, really good info i think. I love the story too Ubi and its exactly true. Its a vicious cycle, just like drugs and alcohol which are bad and when you feed it, it only gets worse. Its what you become used to and eventualy becomes so bad you make excuses for it.
Im a very very laid back person, relaxed, gentle, compassionate, romantic, and overall a great guy but i would have bouts of anger issues. None of them ever led to the law thank god and i never hurt anyone around me and never laid a hand on anyone but i knew if i didnt correct the problem , one day something may get out of hand.
I also find that i usualy get really angry over stuff i beleive in and compassionate things. What i do now is stop and breathe, breathing has helped me in so many ways. I ask myself if i really wanna lash out and who will it benefit, the obvious answer is noone and i make myself relax and calm down.
Good luck bro and i hope things workout for you, before you see a doc, try the therapist if you indeed need to go there, if that doesnt help try some of the herbs suggested here, anti-depressants arent cool in my eyes and only make problems worse.
E-Pharm Rep... PM me with any questions or concerns
07-09-2006, 07:33 PM
Wow, that story is really awesome! Thank you for sharing that with us.
Tons of good info from everybody on this subject. I'm quite surprised how many of us are living with the problem...and how many of us have conquered it. Maybe BBing attracts us, as a means of venting our anger and making something positive out of it.
I recently got a book, by a buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh. He writes alot of books on alot of subjects, but this particular one "Anger: Cooling the Flames" has been a good read. The idea is to acknowledge your angry, and deal with the emotion in a calm, collected and organized fashion. It's been helping.
I hope we can keep this thread going a little longer, so far I'm surprised at the support everybody has shown. Thank you!!!
07-09-2006, 08:13 PM
I myself had recent horribly embarrising and shaming moment with my wife when I WAS hammered. There is the problem. ALCOHOL. I found that I never explode when I am sober.....almost never unless I am in a fight or flight situation. I am trying so many things to redirect myself to something other than drinking. Even ON cycle I have a hard time not drinking every day. I am now 5 dyas with only 2 beers that i drank while watching UFC last night. My goal isnt to quit drinking but to never EVER allow alcohol to get me to were i am hurting the people I love most. Any helpful hints would help.
07-10-2006, 04:45 AM
Originally Posted by kjkriston
I have a friend who is just like that. He's been in and out of jail the past year, convicted felon for assault D/W. His problems are caused by alcohol. I recommend going to meetings, as alcoholism is a serious thing. Good luck man.
07-10-2006, 05:49 AM
If alcohol can cause this then giving it up is the way to go. The effect isn't worth the risks if you're one of the ones who has problems controlling themselves.
07-10-2006, 06:29 AM
Back when I was 14 or so I started getting a pretty short fuse, punching the door and all that then around last year I got pretty abusive if I had been drinking too much and lately I've just decided it's not worth doing to myself so I stopped going to pubs/clubs. On the downside it means I pretty much don't get to socialize with my friends but I know that if I were to goto somewhere that served drink that I'd just get drunk and do something stupid.
On the plus side I've saved a hell of a lot of money.
07-23-2006, 05:31 PM
Yea dude,that is how I drive myself nuts often.Thinking about things you have no controll over anymore is just torture.Ex girlfriend I can relate there. We can only affect the future,or we can make ourselves nuts thinking about things that bother us.I tend to stay in the past more than i need to.Originally Posted by CHAPS
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