Flirting

[James]

Flirting…. Is it harmless?

Specifically flirting if your in a committed relationship.

Is if a form of unfaithfulness?


The reason I bring this up is because the girl I am involved with told me she is a *flirt*

Well she told me that shortly after we met.

Now the thought of her flirting with other guys ****ing infuriates me.

But wait… she said that she will no longer flirt now that she is involved with me.

She told me this after I let her know that I could not be with a woman that flirts with other men.

So can a person that flirts… change?

I always figured certain women flirt… and certain women don’t.

Ideally I would chose a woman that does not flirt as a *relationship type*

As luck would have it I have fallen hard for this girl and the relationship hit warp speed.

Like I said the thought of her flirting makes me crazy.

So… what do you guys think of flirting?

Can a flirt stop flirting?

 

[FitnFirm]

Hey, I see your issue here.


If you have really fallen hard already, I say go with the flow and give her a chance, there will be no need for flirting if she is getting everything she needs from you, mainly attention. Watch how she is out in public with you and such and then if she begins to be the same ole flirt she said she was then it would be a good idea to look elsewhere for a relationship.

 

[moklepaul]

Nothing wrong with flirting, as long as it doesn't go any further.

Just be happy knowing that other guys waste time flirting with her, but you take her home at night

 

[phillyb]

Nothing wrong with flirting, as long as it doesn't go any further.

I agree with that. There is nothing wrong with flirting, it's just two people talking. However, if some sort of physical contact starts to happen, i.e. putting her hand on his arm or chest, thats when I would become a little worried. Just don't make a big deal out of it, and let her know if any of her actions are bothering you.

 

[Mulletsoldier]

Not dissing you, but it seems like you might be insecure. This is a relationship, not ownership, so if she happens to speak or "flirt" with other men but is still faithfully committed to you, I don't see an issue. The fact that her flirting infuriates you implies that you are a very jealous cat, something that in my experience no woman wants, basically because jealousy implies a huge lack of trust and insecurity (not only in yourself but in her). If you cannot find it in you to "allow" your gf, girl, whatever she may be to talk to other guys, you might be out of luck for a fulfilling relationship man.

 

[mp5man1]

Only other guys girls can flirt. And guys of course

 

[yeahright]

Whether flirting is acceptable in the relationship is a matter for the two people in the relationship to define. You two need to find your own rhythm together, talk to one another when something is bothering you, understand where the other person is coming from.

Examples of how NOT to do this:

You shouldn't...........
I hate it when.............
I forbid................

Examples of successful ways to initiate these conversations:

It makes me feel sad/jealous/disrespected when you................
How does it make you feel when...........
Can we talk about.....................

The idea here is that the relationship is something that is a joint endeavor. It won't work unless both parties are comfortable with the structures/rules of that relationship.

Women (as a general rule) tend to respond better to emotions and the context of relationships. If her flirting is bothering you, you might say something like "Men are really stupid and when you flirt with them, they take it seriously. This makes me feel bad."

Ideally, her response should be something like "I don't want to do anything to hurt you....but this is a part of my personality. I'll do my best to tone it down and you let me know if it bothers you again."

With this example, she has acknowledged your legitimate concern, but also asserted her own identifty (this is part of my personality). People should be willing to make an effort to please their partner but not be expected to subvert the basic parts of their personality.

If her response is something like "you'll just have to live with it" then she's showing no concern for your feelings and you'll have to decide for yourself whether it is in fact something that you can live with.

 

[somewhatgifted]

for most guys a girl flirts and they get the green light. I find this annoying b/c it put you in an awkward place these dudes see you and automatically puff their chest towards you. Its a big competition for them and i would question why she needs all this attention, she sounds like she will never change and describing her behavior as "flirting" is a creative playful way to tell you shes playing games. I would simply switch roles with her and give her a taste of her own medicine. some consider this childish but thats how people learn pain and pleasure. your other option is to ignore it but why should you accept unnacceptable behavior. If she said something bothered her would you keep doing it? she already said she'd stop so remind her. Flirting is what sinlge people do, having social converations and exchanging jokes is normal for commited people but flirting IMO is not.

 

[Jayhawkk]

I flirt all the time and the women know i'm faithful and married. It's done jokingly with no intent for anything further. I also respect my wife enough to not do this in her presence.

 

[AllInOneBottle]

Somewhat gifted put it exactly the way i think,in my opinion flirting is a sign that the person who is flirting wants to be with/wants to hook up with the other person they are flirting with,so I think that is being unfaithful.Thats just what I think.

 

[James]

Wow good responses....I appreciate the input

To be fair (to her)… she did say she would stop flirting and I believe her… or am in the process of being convinced.

Mulletsoldier brings up the issues of insecurity, jealousy and trust.

This is something else that worries me…. I am not the jealous type.

It occurs to me that there is a valid reason for my jealousy or lack of trust.. call it what you will.

Its hard to put my finger on at the moment.

As if my spidy senses are going off like crazy telling me something might be off and maybe I should listen (hell this could be lack of sleep as much as anything… my spidy sense??...What about a bull****ometer

It also occurs to me that I may just be totally unsuitable for a serious relationship… lol sad but true?

Also… I do not want to change who she is.

If she is a flirt… she is a flirt.

Any change she makes she will most likely end up resenting me for… correct?

That said, its not something I am comfortable with her doing.

If you guys could not tell I have not been in to many *serous* relationships…. In that I never let my feelings run that deep.

This just hit me like a damn freight train (deep feelings/ love) and I am scrambling to figure these things out…. I am also sleep deprived for a while now…. Zombie.

Like I said I would not intend on getting serous with a *flirt* … simply rubs me the wrong way.

Yearhight – I have talked to her about this…. I am a very open person.

Thing is… instead of getting a handle on where she is coming from I am having a very hard time understanding/reading her.

Seems to be a bit of double talk and uncertainty when she attempts to express herself.

She has said that she does not want to do anything to hurt me and she will no longer flirt.

When all is said and done I guess I want to know if her stopping something she is naturally inclined to do is healthy.

If its going to be problematic I would like to know sooner as opposed to later.

So maybe I should word the question this way – *should* a flirt stop flirting or simply find someone who is comfortable with it?

Interestingly enough she would have none of me flirting with other women…. This is not a big deal to me since I don’t really flirt anyway.

Its tough… I do love this girl and believe it or not I want to do what would be best/right for her.....on the other hand I am selfish and want her in my life (I’m a little addicted)

Yes I have a headache now……

 

[B5150]

there will be no need for flirting if she is getting everything she needs from you, mainly attention.

I am a stealth flirt myself. But when my wife *truely pays attention to me I am very less likely to flirt. I imagine it holds true for both genders.

*not just listening to the words coming out of my mouth

 

[FitnFirm]

Definitions
flirt
verb

intr
flirted, flirting
1. To behave in a playful sexual manner towards them.

Thesaurus: ogle, philander, tease, coquet, dally, wink at, toy with.
Form: flirt with someone (usually)
noun

1. Someone who flirts.

Thesaurus: philanderer, wanton, coquette, heart-breaker, tease, siren, vamp, vixen, minx.
Derivative: flirtation
noun

Playful sexual behaviour
Thesaurus: affair, dalliance, fling, philandering, trifling, toying, coquetry, dallying.
Derivative: flirtingly
adverb

Derivative: flirty
adj

Etymology: 16c: compare flick, flip.

Phrasal Verb: flirt with something
To take a fleeting interest in it; to consider it briefly.To treat (death, danger, etc) lightly; to play riskily with it.

 

[B5150]

Phrasal Verb: flirt with something
To take a fleeting interest in it; to consider it briefly.To treat (death, danger, etc) lightly; to play riskily with it.

Bingo

 

[Jayhawkk]

You may pull the dictionary but I will almost guarentee you that most would consider many of the shoutbox comments flirting if their spouses were to watch.

 

[James]

Definitions
flirt
verb

intr
flirted, flirting
1. To behave in a playful sexual manner towards them.

Thesaurus: ogle, philander, tease, coquet, dally, wink at, toy with.
Form: flirt with someone (usually)
noun

1. Someone who flirts.

Thesaurus: philanderer, wanton, coquette, heart-breaker, tease, siren, vamp, vixen, minx.
Derivative: flirtation
noun

Playful sexual behaviour
Thesaurus: affair, dalliance, fling, philandering, trifling, toying, coquetry, dallying.
Derivative: flirtingly
adverb

Derivative: flirty
adj

Etymology: 16c: compare flick, flip.

Phrasal Verb: flirt with something
To take a fleeting interest in it; to consider it briefly.To treat (death, danger, etc) lightly; to play riskily with it.

Wow… good post.

I have never read the definition for flirt before.

This may be an issue of character.

A person willing to behave like that is not someone I would normally want to give my heart to.

 

[size]

Flirting is not harmless. To believe so is naive b/c in the long run someone is going to feel neglected or rejected.

Despite what many believe, flirting is going to lead to problems.

Would you put a fox in a hen house even if the fox promised just to look?

 

[Viperspit]

Flirting is generally harmless and I'd blow it off. You can tell right off if she has intentions of even thinking of taking it any further. If that's the case, dump her, there's plenty of hot chicks out there.

If FnF flirts in front of me she's gonna get a spanking.....

 

[Trauma1]

I would simply switch roles with her and give her a taste of her own medicine. some consider this childish but thats how people learn pain and pleasure.

I couldn't agree more with this statement.....flirting is harmless to a degree. Sometimes people need a taste of their own medicine to give them a better perspective of the situation.

 

[Jayhawkk]

If the flirting is going on in your face then there's other problems.

 

[Viperspit]

If the flirting is going on in your face then there's other problems.

Good point, if that's the situation then I'd be really pissed. to the point of #$@@%.......$@#$$@##$.....@#$@#$, then I'd @$@#%@#%$, right in the @#%@#% and tell #$@#$ to F#$ off!

 

[raider1]

My opinion is most flirting is harmless, but there are occasions when you get vibes about certain situations that it's not.. and tell her that certain guys take you doing this the wrong way and could lead to serious problems with the a--holes.. if she keeps doing it and knows how you feel, just WALK away because it will lead to more heartache the longer your together... It's just having respect for each other..it is a 2 way street

 

[3clipseGT]

Wow good responses....I appreciate the input

To be fair (to her)… she did say she would stop flirting and I believe her… or am in the process of being convinced.

Mulletsoldier brings up the issues of insecurity, jealousy and trust.

This is something else that worries me…. I am not the jealous type.

It occurs to me that there is a valid reason for my jealousy or lack of trust.. call it what you will.

Its hard to put my finger on at the moment.

As if my spidy senses are going off like crazy telling me something might be off and maybe I should listen (hell this could be lack of sleep as much as anything… my spidy sense??...What about a bull****ometer

It also occurs to me that I may just be totally unsuitable for a serious relationship… lol sad but true?

Also… I do not want to change who she is.

If she is a flirt… she is a flirt.

Any change she makes she will most likely end up resenting me for… correct?

That said, its not something I am comfortable with her doing.

If you guys could not tell I have not been in to many *serous* relationships…. In that I never let my feelings run that deep.

This just hit me like a damn freight train (deep feelings/ love) and I am scrambling to figure these things out…. I am also sleep deprived for a while now…. Zombie.

Like I said I would not intend on getting serous with a *flirt* … simply rubs me the wrong way.

Yearhight – I have talked to her about this…. I am a very open person.

Thing is… instead of getting a handle on where she is coming from I am having a very hard time understanding/reading her.

Seems to be a bit of double talk and uncertainty when she attempts to express herself.

She has said that she does not want to do anything to hurt me and she will no longer flirt.

When all is said and done I guess I want to know if her stopping something she is naturally inclined to do is healthy.

If its going to be problematic I would like to know sooner as opposed to later.

So maybe I should word the question this way – *should* a flirt stop flirting or simply find someone who is comfortable with it?

Interestingly enough she would have none of me flirting with other women…. This is not a big deal to me since I don’t really flirt anyway.

Its tough… I do love this girl and believe it or not I want to do what would be best/right for her.....on the other hand I am selfish and want her in my life (I’m a little addicted)

Yes I have a headache now……

Bro ive been in many a situations like urs before. Im not a very jealous person either and hide my jealousy very well as i can control it. The way i look at it though is that why should she have to flirt and get attention attracted to her if shes full happy with me? I never could understand that.

Im a very flirty person when im single and have a great time but when im in a relationship all the bs stopped and would very rarely flirt and i would only do it when she wasnt present. I just dont want another dude getting the wrong idea and im sure thats how you feel as well. I understand ur point fully bro and feel that if she says she will change give her time. Keep ur distance just enough to where if she would do something to hurt you, you wont be hurt terribly but dont put to much space between you both. Take it a day at a time and see if she does change and if she doesnt, just be honest with her. " Hey look i dont think this will workout " explain to her that thats how she is and thats fine but you arent comfortable with someone like that.

Hope it goes well bro.

 

[FitnFirm]

You guys crack me up LOL

There are Friendly people and there are flirts.

I am a friendly person, I love to talk to people, I can start a conversation with a perfect stranger and make friends very easy. Im just not shy. None of my remarks are sexual in any form, But I do praise others for their hard work and give out compliments when deserved.


Now the flirt is a different person ,the flirt looks for a response from the other person, if they see what they want they have succeeded in getting to step 1, step one leads to step 2 & 3 in a matter of time.

Ever heard the term " flirting with disaster"

Some girls like to make their boyfriends jealous, they think that means they like them more, WRONG!!!!!!!! This boils down to immaturity, insecurity, and lack of self respect. This person thinks they have nothing else to offer, so they use it as a tool to get attention in hopes of finding love or attention as they are starved of both!

 

[Beau]

I think a lot of what people call flirting would fall into two general camps (1) general light-hearted joking, and (2) actual flirtation, expressing some degree of sexual interest - even in jest.

The first camp: OK by me. I do it, and enjoy when others do. I would feel OK regardless of who saw me or heard me; regardless of whether it was my spouse, my child, my neighbor or someone from church. I would be OK with it if it were to be published in the newspaper.

The second camp: For me, not OK. I've just seen too much of it gone awry. If I would have any reservation about anyone (especially my spouse or my child) seeing me or hearing me, misconstruing things, or it being general knowledge - I shouldn't be doing it. If I would be the least bit concerned about seeing/hearing (etc.) my wife playing either role with someone else - that is another good litmus test suggesting I shouldn't be doing it.

I see it this way (and it sounds like I'm not the norm [its not the first time]): A guy flirts as a way of meeting some type of need. That need might be to feel attractive, feed his ego, get attention, amuse others, be friendly, break the ice, etc. It could be any number of things. To be really honest, one of those things just might be that he is "serving the ball over the net to see if the other person is willing to hit it back".

Certain things, IMO, need to be kept exclusive to those in a committed relationship. Certain needs should be exclusively filled by the other person in that committed relationship. If those needs aren't being met by the other party, or the other person in the relationship fails to be the sole recipient of that type of attention, I think it opens a crack in the door; one that will possibly erode the level of commitment.

I would have to think that many affairs start this way. Someone just doesn't accidentally trip and have his Johnson fall into someone else. It has to start somewhere. It just might be that one person showed an interest outside the relationship, even if “just kidding”. I’m going to guess that, as they say, one thing leads to another.

What would happen if you were to flirt with some drop dead gorgeous person – just in jest – and they offered to take you up on your offer? Suppose you were to use your best line (you know, “They didn’t call me Donkey-Boy in college for nothing.”) and she responded favorably (say, “make me bray like your hot monkey love mule”). Would you just say no? Would you say no if no one else would ever know about it?

I say – don’t put yourself in that position. I used to be a huge flirt and I never cheated. I just saw the hurt it could cause, and I'm not willing to take that chance. I now make sure I flirt only with my wife.

OK - here is the hard part (and I'll probably be chastized): It isn't enough not to actively pursue someone else, or not to be "looking". I think we really need to make a concious effort not to send the wrong messages or put ourselves in the wrong place. My relationship with my wife (and her self esteem) is too important for me to jeopardize by acting like a horn-dog.

 

[yeahright]

:goodpost:

 

[Iron Warrior]

I like your distinctions Beau. Light hearted joking is normal and any man/woman who villifies his/her significant other for it has issues. I'm a very light hearted jokester and unfortunately have been with women who were too insecure/possessive about it and conflicts followed as a result. One time my ex nearly crucified me because she saw me joking with a high school friend who was very good looking, but it was nothing more then a friendly conversation.

Now the second camp as outlined by Beau is a different story. I would not hesitate to cut ties with her no matter how great she is in bed or how beautiful she is because IMO that is disrespectful and does not be tolerated. Any man with some self worth would not stand for that crap, if that is the situation you're under then I say cut ties and look elsewhere James.

 

[Jayhawkk]

Exactly my point earlier beau. Cat 1 is done by most people with no intent behind it and don't expect anything from it. Falls more in line of being funny or witty etc.

 

[BigCasino]

I am going to have to go against what quite a few of the other fellas are saying and caution you NOT to put up with that ****. While other people may be able to tolerate it, I can tell that you will not handle it well, and ultimately if it does occur regularly it WILL cause problems for you. I love the opposite sex, but when I am in a serious relationship, one of my ways of showing respect is controlling that urge to be "flirty", and I expect that respect to be recipricated. After all, if it is a serious relationship and you are investing time, money, and emotions into it, why the heck should your girl be parading around giving other guys the wrong idea, even if it is just "playful". As someone else pointed out there, there is a deff difference between having a convo, and flirting...

 

[CHAPS]

I had a girlfriend that was the biggest flirt you've ever seen, she'd actually touch the guy, i got in sooooooooo many fights with her about this, so finally i just decided to flirt like mad with other women, this made her jealous as hell, but she still didn't stop, so i dumped her ass. She was such a flirt that i felt i couldn't trust her and that when she was out with friends she'd end up picking up some guy.

 

[austinwsj]

what if you had been in a serious relationship for 5 years, and youre on a pretty libido inducing cycle, and somebody youve had your eye on "offered", what would YOU do?

im talking bout being moved in with the gf, in a financially stable and good relationhip, just the fire aint as strong anymore.

on the other hand, the new chick is pretty notch, one of the hot ones that youd rarely get the chance to bang, made the first move. AND she knows you got a gf.

what then?

no no or down low?

 

[FitnFirm]

what if you had been in a serious relationship for 5 years, and youre on a pretty libido inducing cycle, and somebody youve had your eye on "offered", what would YOU do?

im talking bout being moved in with the gf, in a financially stable and good relationhip, just the fire aint as strong anymore.

on the other hand, the new chick is pretty notch, one of the hot ones that youd rarely get the chance to bang, made the first move. AND she knows you got a gf.

what then?

no no or down low?

I say grow up and stop letting your penis make decisions for you, the fact that you even thought about that makes you less than perfect to be a trusted person in a relationship.

Did it ever occur to you that the new chick is just trying too see if you would bite? If you were single it wouldnt happen or it would of already, its a challenge for her to see if you would bite, did you fail? or did you pass?????

and lastly, a relationship takes two, if your bedroom is boring its half your fault, so instead of taking the easy way out to get a few minutes of pleasure for yourself, do something to improve the relationship for both of you, or get out.

 

[austinwsj]

hmm,

i respect the criticism, but theres a few other facts that I am leaving out.

i do understand that I am under the influence of raging hormones and temptation.

BUT i was kinda throwing this out to the guys. the chick knows youre situation and is still hollering at you.

how many of you would bite?

 

[Beau]

what if you had been in a serious relationship for 5 years, .....and somebody youve had your eye on "offered"...

Honestly, I would hope if I was committed enough to be in a serious 5 year relationship - I would not have my eye on someone else. I realize I view most things through my married perspective.

I'm not saying that any time someone is in a 5 year relationship it would have to be exclusive (although it would be for me). To me, a serious relationship connotes exclusivity (otherwise it would be a casual relationship). To me, those who choose to live with someone chooses to "play house"; and for most this is probably a precursor to marriage (or a sort of trial period). I believe it means both people should probably be serious enough to make sure it is exclusive.

For me, I see to it that - by design - I do not knowingly have my eye out for another. That doesn't mean I do not notice others who are attractive (or naked); after all, I'm not dead. I just don't act on it or put myself in that position (again - by design).

Lets address another point: The fire. It is impossible for the passion to remain at the same fever pitch as it was initially. Think about when you were younger and goit a new puppy (or had a favorite song on a CD). You probably couldn't wait to get home to play with it/hear it. But after a while, the novelty died down. Metaphorically the same thing happens with the fire, over time.

For some, that sign of dying down may be a sign that they need to move on; to get some "new". For others, the dying down of the infactuation/red hot period is partially replaced by something that (while less scintillating) becomes the benchmark for a long term relationship: trust and committment.

Emotions are great (the good ones, anyway), but at some point the novelty of the "feeling in love" drops off. That is a primary difference between "loving someone" (a conscious daily decision) and "feeling in love" (infactuation/desire/passion).

The feelings of being in love don't go away alltogether, they just subside and are oversome by something else. They simply CANNOT be sustained forever at their initial level. Over time the novelty wears off - that is human nature.

 

[BigCasino]

Honestly, I would hope if I was committed enough to be in a serious 5 year relationship - I would not have my eye on someone else. I realize I view most things through my married perspective.

I'm not saying that any time someone is in a 5 year relationship it would have to be exclusive (although it would be for me). To me, a serious relationship connotes exclusivity (otherwise it would be a casual relationship). To me, those who choose to live with someone chooses to "play house"; and for most this is probably a precursor to marriage (or a sort of trial period). I believe it means both people should probably be serious enough to make sure it is exclusive.

For me, I see to it that - by design - I do not knowingly have my eye out for another. That doesn't mean I do not notice others who are attractive (or naked); after all, I'm not dead. I just don't act on it or put myself in that position (again - by design).

Lets address another point: The fire. It is impossible for the passion to remain at the same fever pitch as it was initially. Think about when you were younger and goit a new puppy (or had a favorite song on a CD). You probably couldn't wait to get home to play with it/hear it. But after a while, the novelty died down. Metaphorically the same thing happens with the fire, over time.

For some, that sign of dying down may be a sign that they need to move on; to get some "new". For others, the dying down of the infactuation/red hot period is partially replaced by something that (while less scintillating) becomes the benchmark for a long term relationship: trust and committment.

Emotions are great (the good ones, anyway), but at some point the novelty of the "feeling in love" drops off. That is a primary difference between "loving someone" (a conscious daily decision) and "feeling in love" (infactuation/desire/passion).

The feelings of being in love don't go away alltogether, they just subside and are oversome by something else. They simply CANNOT be sustained forever at their initial level. Over time the novelty wears off - that is human nature.

Just wanted to say thanks Beau for the post, it was very interesting and provided a prospective I had not spent enough time pondering.


To Austin, don't do it man. I wouldn't. I have had that happen many times, but you gotta stay strong. If you want to go play with that girl, then get out of your relationship, otherwise pony up some loyalty and keep on moving.

 

[austinwsj]

Honestly, I would hope if I was committed enough to be in a serious 5 year relationship - I would not have my eye on someone else. I realize I view most things through my married perspective.

I'm not saying that any time someone is in a 5 year relationship it would have to be exclusive (although it would be for me). To me, a serious relationship connotes exclusivity (otherwise it would be a casual relationship). To me, those who choose to live with someone chooses to "play house"; and for most this is probably a precursor to marriage (or a sort of trial period). I believe it means both people should probably be serious enough to make sure it is exclusive.

For me, I see to it that - by design - I do not knowingly have my eye out for another. That doesn't mean I do not notice others who are attractive (or naked); after all, I'm not dead. I just don't act on it or put myself in that position (again - by design).

Lets address another point: The fire. It is impossible for the passion to remain at the same fever pitch as it was initially. Think about when you were younger and goit a new puppy (or had a favorite song on a CD). You probably couldn't wait to get home to play with it/hear it. But after a while, the novelty died down. Metaphorically the same thing happens with the fire, over time.

For some, that sign of dying down may be a sign that they need to move on; to get some "new". For others, the dying down of the infactuation/red hot period is partially replaced by something that (while less scintillating) becomes the benchmark for a long term relationship: trust and committment.

Emotions are great (the good ones, anyway), but at some point the novelty of the "feeling in love" drops off. That is a primary difference between "loving someone" (a conscious daily decision) and "feeling in love" (infactuation/desire/passion).

The feelings of being in love don't go away alltogether, they just subside and are oversome by something else. They simply CANNOT be sustained forever at their initial level. Over time the novelty wears off - that is human nature.

thats what im talking about. doubting my own comittment as the next step in the relationship is marriage and kids. is she the one? do i really want that? i dont know...
weve gotten along together great and i do care for her well being and getting what she wants, but do i wanna marry her???

i guess its the biological timeclock. the lady wants to move on and my mind is still on playing. keep in mind were both the same age and were both new college grads. in the game of life its nice to get a head start, buy a house and all that. but at the same time im **** scared of getting hitched to one person for the rest of my life. maybe just not ready yet? maybe this is an easy out? maybe im just nuts?

 

[CHAPS]

I'll be honest i dunno what i'd do, especially if i was on Prop or suspension, women turn into meat when i'm on that ****, lol. It depends what type of person you are, i can't say i wouldn't fool around with the other chick, i probably would, lol But that's me, depends on how much the other relationship matters to u, if you know it'll be ending soon then by all means go for the hot chick. If not think twice.

 

[austinwsj]

I'll be honest i dunno what i'd do, especially if i was on Prop or suspension, women turn into meat when i'm on that ****, lol. It depends what type of person you are, i can't say i wouldn't fool around with the other chick, i probably would, lol But that's me, depends on how much the other relationship matters to u, if you know it'll be ending soon then by all means go for the hot chick. If not think twice.

thx for being honest. lol.

 

[Mrs. Gimpy!]

You may pull the dictionary but I will almost guarentee you that most would consider many of the shoutbox comments flirting if their spouses were to watch.

agreed. i've flirted...joked, whatever some people may refer to it as with some members of the forum, but thats the kind of person i am. kwyck and i NEVER have a problem at all with that in real life, let alone on the internet. im in a 4.5 year relationship, and its absolutely great. wouldnt change a thing (except maybe wishing my school was over with). we are honestly happier than most married people and its due to our TRUST .

 

[Jayhawkk]

^^ Yes ma'am! Trust is key to any relationship. Without it, it will fail eventually. With that being said...You're quite hawt and I may have to take kwik out of the picture using my ninja skills and duct tape

 

[Viperspit]

You may pull the dictionary but I will almost guarentee you that most would consider many of the shoutbox comments flirting if their spouses were to watch.

Yep, that's why FnF is not allowed in the shoutbox anymore, if you catch her there, you have my permission for a 3-day ban on her

 

[Pitbull954]

^^ Yes ma'am! Trust is key to any relationship. Without it, it will fail eventually. With that being said...You're quite hawt and I may have to take kwik out of the picture using my ninja skills and duct tape

Jay your too much man. Your the reason I don't do ab's at the gym, I'm always laughing at you! LOLOL Duct tape!

 

[xtraflossy]

Well, what she is doing is TESTING YOU!!!!
She did say that she is a flirt,... she got your reaction (I hope you handled it well, and remained secure that she was with you...) and then she said that she no longer would.

I ask you this... If you didn't think of her as a flirt before,.. how would she magicly become one now... and tell you this AFTER you got involved????????
The answer could be that: She made it up. Why she made it up I couldn't guess. But the more common are:
-If she felt that she wasn't getting enough attention from you...
- To test and see what your reaction would be,.. inessence, to find out how much YOU cared about HER. By responding the way you did, her need to KNOW how you felt about her was satisfied.

Just an observation on my part,.. in my own expirence, and from a little research and such...
Bottom line, IMO- if you didnt know she was a flirt before, it's probably cause she's not - But she wanted to see if you'd be pissed, upfront, or indifferent.

 

[bluegirl78]

This is James' girlfriend. I have read over all of the responses the last few days (I was present when James wrote the original post), and I feel compelled to respond...........

First, I do not consider myself a flirt, by the definition in the dictionary. But as a single woman, I did initiate and/or participate in friendly conversations with the opposite sex that sometimes included topics of a sexual nature. I never said it was something I did while in a relationship, felt strongly compelled to do, or needed in order to feel good about myself. But a quick fix of male attention isn't a bad thing when you are single.

Now, I am involved in a serious, committed relationship with a man that I love with all my heart. Not only would I not do anything to hurt him, I have no interest in any other man, whatsoever. I didn't think I needed to say that I wouldn't be, "flirting," with other men, because I thought that was implied by the serious nature of our relationship. Going out of one's way to imply to a person, other than your significant other that you are available, or interested, is disrespectful, and demeaning to your relationship. This goes both ways.... I also expect my boyfriend to respond to situations the way he would want me to.

So, James, can a flirt stop flirting? I don't know about anyone else, but it hasn't been hard for me.

 

[FitnFirm]

Yep, that's why FnF is not allowed in the shoutbox anymore, if you catch her there, you have my permission for a 3-day ban on her

Im glad I saw this before I ironed all your clothes for next week, and Im also glad you are off for 4 days so you can do the cooking for a change, while I lay in the sun eating bon bons Oh, dont forget to mow the lawn!!!! Kisses!!!!!!

 

[Viperspit]

Im glad I saw this before I ironed all your clothes for next week, and Im also glad you are off for 4 days so you can do the cooking for a change, while I lay in the sun eating bon bons Oh, dont forget to mow the lawn!!!! Kisses!!!!!!

You'll do all the above ......



and like it! But I will let you rub oil all over my :bb2:
while I lie in the sun tomorrow.

 

[yeahright]

This is James' girlfriend. I have read over all of the responses the last few days (I was present when James wrote the original post), and I feel compelled to respond...........

First, I do not consider myself a flirt, by the definition in the dictionary. But as a single woman, I did initiate and/or participate in friendly conversations with the opposite sex that sometimes included topics of a sexual nature. I never said it was something I did while in a relationship, felt strongly compelled to do, or needed in order to feel good about myself. But a quick fix of male attention isn't a bad thing when you are single.

Now, I am involved in a serious, committed relationship with a man that I love with all my heart. Not only would I not do anything to hurt him, I have no interest in any other man, whatsoever. I didn't think I needed to say that I wouldn't be, "flirting," with other men, because I thought that was implied by the serious nature of our relationship. Going out of one's way to imply to a person, other than your significant other that you are available, or interested, is disrespectful, and demeaning to your relationship. This goes both ways.... I also expect my boyfriend to respond to situations the way he would want me to.

So, James, can a flirt stop flirting? I don't know about anyone else, but it hasn't been hard for me.

Delightful.

 

[FitnFirm]

Delightful.

Doubleishious

 

[moklepaul]

Takeitoffish.

 

[refrieddreams]

I think she is insecure and needs attention.

Much like myself.