My wife SHOCKED me today
- 09-25-2004, 04:50 AM
My wife SHOCKED me today
This is something I never thought I'd experience. My wife and I were in discussions and I wanted to asked her SINCE we have been dating and married had she EVER seen another man that she found attractive.
Now I guess this is a question I should have not asked IF I did not want to know the answer. But my stupid ass had to know. After I asked and asked and asked she finally told me. What shocked me is her answer.
My wife thinks Ronnie Coleman, Gunter ( which is not a real surprised) and Kevin are very attractive and sexy. She went on to say that she finds Ronnie or Gunter "sexually" attractive. I asked her to elaborate.
To my surprised she has ALWAYS found VERY BIG muscle men ( bodybuilders) to be very sexy and attractive. This was a big shock to me considering before we dated I was the only bodybuilder she ever been with.
I mean I've seen her past boyfriends and one of them looks like "J,J" (Jimmy Walker) from Goodtimes. Well I must admit I was jealous and a bit hurt but then I thought I'm not going to be the ONLY guy she finds attractive. It's just part of marriage and dating.
What do you guys think? Would you have been jealous had your wife or girlfriend told you they think Ronnie or Gunter is a sexual TURN ON ( in other words can get them wet)? Or would you find it okay considering you TOO find other women HOT and sexually sexy?
- 09-25-2004, 05:05 AM
It's a fact that your spouse finds someone else attractive. It's getting them to admit it to you that is the problem. that is of course if you want to know the truth.
What I have found out is the direct opposite of you. I am by no stretch of the imagination even close to your build or will probably ever be but aws i've grown bigger my wife tells me she hates it. I thought she was just telling me these things at first(i dont like muscles etc etc) to be nice but over the past year or so she lets me know her down right disgust of people like cutler, coleman and priest(three guys I look up to as far as BB goes)
You should be happy because the chance of her finding other body builders bigger than you is much slimmer than my wife finding some skinny guy.
- 09-25-2004, 06:46 AM
Yeah I understand Jay but that does not necessarily cheer me up. If my body is so good why would she even, look at Ronnie and Gunter as "sexual turn ons"? I'd probably prefer my wife to find it not as attractive. This way when I decide to slim down she would not still find the "big bodybuilding" look as sexually attractive.
Well you learn something new everyday.
09-25-2004, 06:50 AM
<nods> that's true but she's with you for a reason. Look at it this way you are probably a total package of what your wife wants where as coleman etc are just part of it.
My first wife was very athletic with almost no body fat etc etc and our marriage was doomed because well, she was a ****in crazty woman. My second wife who i've been with going on 9 years isn't athletic but she makes me happy. I still find athletic women attractive to look at even though I wouldnt disrespect my wife by doing it while with her.
Your wife is with ya because she wants to be with you and not someone else or she would be. Hope that helps
09-25-2004, 07:04 AM
Yeah I got ya. I guess when she sees Ronnie all she sees is a body but with me she sees much more.
I think the part that gets me is the "sexual" turn on. I mean had she just found them attractive becuz of their large muscles is one thing but to admit that she could get sexually turned on watching them is another.
I don't care how you cut it no MAN ( at least that I know) enjoys that thought? However I cannot talk as I find the fitness and figure women sexy. So i guess it's okay. Well at least you explained it.
09-25-2004, 12:15 PM
Bro I don't like it the same as you but she's going to be attracted to other guys. You see girls walkin around that you think are hot why should she be any different. You have to be secure and confident, remember bro she married you and not all of those other guys for a reason.
09-25-2004, 12:42 PM
Yea, same here. I bust my ass in the gym and dream of the days I look like those guys and I found out that my sig other doesn't like the look. But I keep driving on anyways because she knows I am happy and that makes her happy. She cut her hair really short and I didn't like her look, but she was happy so I dealt with it. As far as her being attracted to different types of figures, well...its a part of life.Originally Posted by Jayhawkk
09-25-2004, 02:13 PM
Nute, you ARE a BBer and definitely look like one! You may not be as big as Ronnie Coleman, but you are much closer in body type than say, 99% of the population, man. You should be glad that you have the look and body type she's attracted to. For my wife, it seems to be more of a face thing - Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, Jake Gyllenhaal...nothing I can do about it - I'll never look like those guys... Then again, she'll never look like Tera Patrick, Carmen Electra, or Salma Hayek! No sweat though, just because I like looking at those girls doesn't mean I think any less of her, and I know she feels the same about me.
09-25-2004, 04:05 PM
HHHMMMMM, if it was me I would be hanging pictures of those dudes in the bedroom for her so I could justify puting up pics of Timea and some pics from playboy.
Look at it this way, every man disassociate sex from love. She loves you, which for a woman is way more of a turn on, and she is with you. If she got the chance to sleep with one of those dudes she would probably run away because she isnt intimate with them like she is with you.
09-25-2004, 04:28 PM
Ok... you are on a site that caters to bodybuilders, which means that you more than likely are either 1) one yourself at some level or 2) are an aspiring BB'er or 3) an enthusiast or hobbyist, if you will.
With that said, it becomes apparent that you favor the sport and have a positive view of the physiques of the men in the sport. Now you say you wife tells you she also likes the way these guys look nd finds it attractive.
Call me crazy but I can only see this as a good thing! Women will always find some other men attractive (and vice versa, we are all human), but now you know it's something familiar to you, BB'ers. Now stop worrying about this crap, check your nutrition plan again, and get your ass back to the gym and show her what she likes, damnit!!!
09-25-2004, 06:15 PM
don't get all worried about it and let it drive you nuts. You would have more to be worried about if she said "no i don't find any man attractive" cause then she'd be lying. It's just human nature. But one thing I've learned is that if you do let it get to you and drive you nuts, and she picks up on it, she might actually start finding YOU less attractive. Ask any woman and i'd say that 99% would say that confidence makes a man extremely attractive. Just like the other guys said, i'm sure she loves you for who you are first and foremost. Lot's of people are attractive, but it's hard to find someone you can actually spend the rest of your life with. The more secure you show her you are in yourself and in your relationship, the happier you both will be. good luck!
09-25-2004, 06:48 PM
09-25-2004, 07:16 PM
Of course I do bulkmuscle. BUT let me explain this one. I tried to get my wife to watch porn with me and she was okay with it but began to compete with the women on the tapes. So now I watch them myself but we are trying to watch "some" together.
09-25-2004, 07:26 PM
well i wouldnt consider her thinking celebrities are sexual arousing a terrible thing. i mean, what woman doesnt look at guys like brad pitt and not drool? only in this case its top pro bb'ers.
09-26-2004, 05:00 AM
wait, wait, wait...........
Nuteboy did you honestly think for one split second that your wife does not think other men are attractive??! Is this about who she finds attractive or the simple fact that she indeed does find some other men attractive, because if it's the latter I cannot understand how you didn't see this as a reality of human nature and sexualty. I suppose should have prefaced that with the fact that I have never really understood blind jealousy. I surely hope this is not that, otherwise I do not see how you could even be married
09-26-2004, 05:17 AM
Well said jweave. After reading your earlier post in this thread, I have a question. You have seen this guys pics, right?Originally Posted by jweave23
09-26-2004, 01:33 PM
09-26-2004, 04:12 PM
Just become swingers. You can get some strange, and you won't have to put out as much energy trying to please her. Let the other guy do it.
Any other problems needed solving today?
09-26-2004, 04:57 PM
Being married for over 12 yrs I cannot expect my wife not to be attracted to other guys (or girls for that matter), and if you truley are best friends, lovers etc. etc. I say explore making each other happy, and realize you are human beings.Hell ,you've already got the look for her, and I say go out and get some training vids, and put them on for her.
09-26-2004, 06:37 PM
Stop being insecure.
For answers to board issues, read the Suggestion and News forum at the bottom of the main page.
09-27-2004, 06:19 PM
09-28-2004, 06:11 PM
ok, im not trying to blow my own horn here, but im considerd a pretty good looking guy. I was a model for a&f for 2 years and continue to do some light work. If I EVER had a girl say she found someone else sexualy attractive besides me, I would dump her like a brick. Keep in mind that im married at the current time, and she has never said anything of the sort. I know its stupid, but I really dont care, its one of my buttons. If you like them enough to get turned on by them, then by all means go seak them out and leave me with someone who only wants me. I had a girl i went out with for a week or 2 looking at a magazine in some store, and she commented on how hot she thought so and so was. I didnt say a word, led her to the car, drove her home, and never talked to her again.
09-28-2004, 06:23 PM
Dag, some of you need to chill, girls love to see confidence in their men, so if you act like you dont give a ****, they will like you even more, next time she brings it up, play it off, agree, or say something cocky/sarcastic.
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