How to install a Southern home security system

The Neck

The Neck

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How to install a Southern security system:

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on the front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine.

3. Put four giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.

4. Leave a note on the door that reads:

Bubba -

Bertha, Duke, Slim & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.

Better wait outside. Be right back.

"Cooter"
 

Evil Eagle

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Hahahaha, nice!

Sent from my Android device
 
bluehealer

bluehealer

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I, Sir, am offended, I do not have a pitbull, I do not drink beer, and I wear a size 8 shoe.



BTW, you forgot to mention the VooDoo head hanging on the front porch.
 
diablosho

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I love these jokes in the morning! Thanks for the laugh!
 

airram479

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How to install a Southern security system:

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on the front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine.

3. Put four giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.

4. Leave a note on the door that reads:

Bubba -

Bertha, Duke, Slim & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.

Better wait outside. Be right back.

"Cooter"
Nice. But, i would have to learn how to translate that in spanish.
 

1slowcivic

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lol, that's awesome.
 

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