Finances - Marriage
- 05-20-2010, 09:42 AM
Finances - Marriage
For those of you who are married or have a partner, How do you handle your finances with your partner? Do you have joint accounts or individual accounts?
Going on two years of marriage and I have decided that its probably best that my wife and I have seperate accounts. By having seperate accounts, she is entitled to her spending money, as well as for me. We are both professional individuals and are tight to where our spending goes.
I plan to have a checking account for bills. A percentage of our individual check will go to this account to pay all bills. We both will have an individual account but with authorization to each others account.
What do you guys think of this Idea? I'm trying to figure out the best way to handle our financials that pleases us both.
- 05-20-2010, 09:50 AMBoard Moderator
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We just have 1 account. It seems to me that if the two of you can't be responsible sharing one account, its hard to share all the rest of the things in your lives too. Even as far as "each having our own spending money" is it somehow fair that if you make more you have more spending money? Or that if you make less you pay less of the bills? The only rule my wife and I have is that on any item over $50 we have to ask the other one first before buying. Otherwise it all goes into one account and we just do whatever we do.
- 05-20-2010, 09:53 AM
My wife and I (married 10 years) have 2 accounts. I learned that she has trouble with finances, so my account is for the bills and it allows me to make sure that I am not going bankruptControlled Labs Head Board Rep
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05-20-2010, 10:03 AM
we have 1 account, but we each get spending money every couple weeks. and like easy, we discuss big purchases.
05-20-2010, 11:08 AM
I'm not married, but my boyfriend and I share a checking account. I believe it all depends on your level of discipline with money. I have debt that I don't expect James to take care off unless I just cannot come up with payment. Vice versa. I'm a bit better at keeping up with money and bills than James so this joint account (which he uses occasionally to pay bills online or buy from Nutra) lets me monitor how much money he spends and how much he should save for bills. This happens to be his only bank account, I have my own checking and savings account that I use for my spending and saving. I tend to be spontaneous with my purchases which is why I choose to keep my own bank accounts. I don't carry much cash on me and I like to use my debit card. That and I've had these accounts since I came to America and they hold some sentimental value to me. When we eventually get married, I'll close my accounts and transfer the money into the joint. I don't make enough money to feel comfortable making the joint my regular account. It would mean using his money contribution more than mine.
05-20-2010, 02:58 PM
Problem I see with seperate accounts is how do you split up the contribution for bills are the bills split down the middle or do you do a percentage what? What about dates, does a married couple have to really decide how a bill at restuaraunt is split up? Plus its kind of sucks if 1 person makes alot more than the other.
05-20-2010, 03:26 PM
05-20-2010, 06:15 PM
Joint accounts. When you get married, it shouldn't be my money your money. It should be our money. Have a couple extra accounts and funnel some fun money or savings, but shared expenses and shared income. Regardless of who makes more. For 7 years I have made twice as much as my wife. We've lived together since 2003 and married since 2005. When we got married, we stopped dividing money.
If you can't figure out how to share money and bills without saying " I'm not paying for your bills and don't spend my money", you have bigger problems to deal with.
05-20-2010, 06:37 PM
Oh and Dave Ramsey says have an emergency fund so that should be a seperate account.
05-20-2010, 06:53 PM
Two accounts which I am the primary funder of and she is a secondary.
We budget the household account to cover household living expenses including utilities, groceries, insurance, cable, phone etc. Her entire check goes to that account. I direct deposit the balance of which she cannot cover - with a surplus. She is thrifty and fruggle and capable of having a surplus at the end of the week or month to do with what she wants - hair color, make-up, lotions, etc.
The balance of my check covers the car payment, mortgage and the savings.
I get what ever I want and she can have whatever she wants. If I want something I inform her I will be getting it. If she has a need for something that she cannot cover with her surplus (savings) I give her what she needs.
There is no mine and hers - its all ours.
05-20-2010, 07:07 PM
Between a man and a woman, it's everything or nothing at all.
05-21-2010, 12:42 PM
YAH go with 2 account it will prevent any arguments.
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05-21-2010, 12:44 PM
05-21-2010, 12:46 PM
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05-21-2010, 01:27 PM
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05-21-2010, 07:24 PM
We both have our own personal checking/savings account and then we have our joint checking/savings account. However, my wife access both, pays the bills, moves money around etc. The three accounts realy come in handy when I am deeployed or out of town/country for training and spending money while she is spending money. Since we can't always talk to each other in those cases at whim this helps prevent either of us over drafting.
Also, not to sound like an a$$hole or that I don't trust my wife, but my pay check is done via direct deposit and I lke to retain the ability to have the ability to deny access to my account and pay at any moment. Call it a trust issue if you will, but I have seen too many a person screwed over when they get out of the field or back from deployment and their wife has been draining the account and sleeping around etc. This I truly believe will never happen because I have an amazing women who looks out for me and I would be lost without, but it is my fail safe switch non the less.
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05-22-2010, 11:29 AM
With my exwife, we had 1 account. With my gf and eventual wife it is two. We divided bills based on income to allow both of us to a % of our income for savings and personal purchases. I prefer the current arrangement although I really never had any problems with my last one. If i want to save a little extra and make a purchase or buy a gift, she doesn't get all of the details. Not that I wouldn't tell if asked but it's nice to buy her some stuff without her knowing when, where and how much.
It's a personal preference and either can work or blow up in your face, if not handled properly.
05-22-2010, 12:00 PM
The way I see it, if you are both pretty good with finances, a joint checking and joint savings shouldn't be too hard. Considering youre both professionals, you deal with comparable incomes, and should be able to decide where money is going.
If one is better than the other with finances, then opening two accounts at the same bank allows same bank transfers when money is needed, and lets you have two accounts.
A joint savings is a good idea whether or not you have a primary joint account. Both parties can throw in some money every month and agree not to touch the funds, and use it for emergencies, or home renovation, vacation, etc.
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05-22-2010, 12:31 PM
Me and my gf had this discussion since we are getting married. If we aren't responsible and honest enough to handle money with eachother then why are we even getting married. I told her to get debt free before we get married and I am close to getting debt free myself. We dont want debt when we get married, it only leads to problems down the road.
Seperate accounts for personal spending, but only after the money for living expenses gets depostied into the joint account.
05-22-2010, 12:36 PM
I'd like to have all of her debt prior to marriage, that way if it doesn't work, I don't owe anything for it at a later date :P
05-22-2010, 12:39 PM
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