Being harsh with a friend? (Weight)

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  1. Quote Originally Posted by SFreed View Post
    Everything you ever wrote, or just this one post.
    Ummm...more likely than not everything ever. Like, even in kindergarten.


  2. Quote Originally Posted by HIT4ME View Post
    Ok...I will say this. I have lost from my high to my low over 130 pounds, maybe more. I didn't do that all on my first try. People fail. She has tried and failed and she is like MOST people who have lost serious weight.

    And it is depressing in itself.

    And there is so much conflict - you eat to much and we will tell you you are unhealthy and will die and call you fat, if you eat too little you are being crazy and unhealthy and have a bad relationship with food. Do this but not that. Everything you think is right is wrong and what you learned was wrong yesterday is right today.

    It's a tough game and it isn't all just will power. There are a lot of forces outside of our control making us fat. Not saying you cannot overcome - but you don't have to try to be fat, it will just happen because of those forces we don't control.

    Be ready for her to fail...but don't treat it as failure. Pick her up, dust her off and say, **** you failed...games not over. If your teammate drops the ball, do you quit playing....especially if they put in hard work?

    Be harsh but kind and show her there is no quitting.
    Shes failed 5 times? That diet thier was her 5th attempt in about 10 month.. Thats whats getting to me the most as its me that structures it all and writes everything down and takes her weigh in's Ive done diets with mates before and had success but this is a tough one.. My other mates never had health issues just wanted a better physique.. Shes a good lassie but does herself no favours sadly.. She recently took 2 weeks off work and sat in the house the full time.. No exercise.. No output.. As i says i went for lunch the other day and took my own grub. Im glad because the full meal was done in a deep fat fryer. I never label good and bad foods but its easy to make healthier choices that still satisfy you.. I came from just under 16 stone and now im around 11 stone 5.. I can eat a ton of food and have off days like everyone but i have... Consistency and dedication. She suffers anxiety but it stems alot from being unhappy with the way she looks and feels.. I sat and explained that SHE can turn all of that around. Put in 6 months of eating well and exercise and she will have a ton more confidence in herself. She goes on holiday in 5 month and has spent alot of money on smaller clothes as an incentive to keep going but just can't do it. Her first diet she lost 3 stone and everyone was noticing the change. She stopped and regained 3 and a half stone back in no time. Just went on an all out binge. I says to her the other day see if you had stuck to that diet do you know you would have been at your target weight now? I got about 40 different excuses. The scales at the shop were broke. Constant times of the month.. Stress.. A was like dont we all suffer stress? I lost control of my work van last year and took out a lamppost.. A telegraph pole and snapped a tree in half and brought that lamppost right through the front windscreen and it wiped out the passenger seat next to me. How i survived? Not a clue.. Lost my job 4 month later.. Stress? Did i stick on over 3 stone.. No chance i dealt with my demons and look even better these days and became a better person and took the stress as a learning curve of life issues. They happen.. Sorry for ranting in folks im just want to see her succeed so badly.. Ive just exhausted every avenue
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